| |
After the walk, they returned to the hotel. Evan had time to shower, change clothes, and read for a short while before Jeremy texted him to say he was ready. They drove to Harbor Town, a waterfront area on Calibogue Sound located near the southwestern end of the island. There was a large marina, shopping, restaurants, and a red and white striped lighthouse overlooking it all.
Jeremy glanced at his watch. “We have about twenty minutes to kill. Do you want to wander for a bit?”
“Is your leg up to it?” Evan asked, then winced, wondering if it would upset Jeremy but he merely chuckled.
“I think I’ll skip any sprints, but an easy walk will be fine. Sitting for too long is usually worse than walking. Window shopping or near the marina?”
“Marina.”
The sun was low in the sky, and the temperature had begun to drop. With a light breeze coming off the water, it was a picture-perfect evening. Jeremy was dressed in khakis and a textured white button-down shirt with the cuffs rolled up to his forearms. The hour or so they’d spent outside had already made Jeremy’s tan darken, and against the white shirt, his eyes seemed more green than usual.
Evan would have felt boring beside him in his charcoal trousers and pale gray shirt, but the look in Jeremy’s eyes when he opened the door made him think Jeremy liked the way he looked too. He hoped so then wondered why it mattered so much. Wasn’t he supposed to be trying to get over Jeremy? It wasn’t going very well.
They walked in comfortable, easy silence. Evan was content to listen to the squawk of seagulls and the gentle clanging of metal against metal as the wind rattled the sails of a large sailboat they passed. The fresh, salty air filled his nose, and if this had been a date, it would have been absolutely perfect.
“I miss sailing,” Jeremy said, out of the blue.
Evan glanced at him. “I didn’t know you sailed.”
“Stephen and I used to go out. Funny, but that’s probably one of the things I miss most about being with him.”
“Not being in the relationship or the sex or anything?” Evan managed to ask without blushing.
Jeremy shook his head. “No, not really. Sure, I miss those things, but it’s sort of a general feeling, you know? I miss having them, but it has nothing to do with Stephen specifically.”
You could have them again, Evan thought, but he wasn’t being fair. Evan didn’t know what he wanted from Jeremy anymore. And even if he did, Jeremy thought he was too fucked up to give it to Evan. Maybe after this weekend they could be friends again, but nothing more. It stung, but eventually, he’d get used to the idea, right?
Jeremy continued. “I liked being out on the water a lot though.” He gestured toward a large boat that probably had a much fancier name like yacht or cabin cruiser, but Evan knew nothing about boats. “Ever wish you could afford one of those?”
Evan shrugged. “If I had that much money, I doubt I’d spend it on a boat, but it would be nice to have the money, I guess. I dunno. Most days, I’m grateful to have a decent job and a place to live.”
“Yeah, good point.” They walked for a few more minutes before Jeremy glanced at his watch again. “We should probably head to the restaurant. It’s about ten to six.”
“Okay.”
They turned back, walking toward the cluster of restaurants and shops. Evan spotted Stephen first, his silver hair gleaming in the sunlight as he laughed at something Russ said.
Russ grinned when Evan and Jeremy approached. “Hey, glad you could make it. Hope you settled in okay at the hotel and had a good afternoon.”
Evan opened his mouth to reply but it was drowned out by a squeal of “Russ!”
Alarmed, he turned to see a girl about his age with long dark hair hurtling toward Russ, who caught her and hugged her tight.
“Hey, sis.” Evan could hear the smile in Russ’ voice.
He’d nearly forgotten Russ had a younger sister.
“Oh, my God, I can’t believe y’all are gettin’ married!”
She hugged Stephen, who looked taken aback by her enthusiasm, but he smiled and hugged her back anyway. “We’re glad you could be here for it, Addie.”
She launched into questions about the plans for the wedding as several more people arrived. Evan began to feel a little overwhelmed by the chaos of loud voices and the number of people greeting and congratulating the grooms. He stepped back, running into Jeremy, who steadied him with a hand on his shoulder.
“Sorry,” he muttered. “It’s a little crowded.”
“It’s fine.” Jeremy’s hand felt hot, even through his shirt, and Evan was surprised by how disappointed he was when Jeremy let go.
Stephen spoke up. “Let’s head inside, and I’ll introduce everyone then.”
Everyone trooped into the restaurant, voices dropping as they passed tables filled with other guests. Stephen led them toward a private room in the back, and Evan ended up sitting between Jeremy and Russ’ dad, who introduced himself as Alan. Evan vaguely remembered him from the engagement party. He had a gruff voice and kind smile that immediately put Evan at ease. Addie and her boyfriend Joseph sat on Alan’s other side, and she offered Evan a friendly wave when Alan introduced them.
Stephen spoke up, introducing everyone at the table. Evan was grateful to recognize Monty and his girlfriend Emily, but as Stephen went around, Evan began to lose track of names.
There were a few poker buddies of Stephen’s, and Evan was surprised when he learned two of them were dating each other. There were some people who worked with Russ and Stephen and their dates and spouses, but they all blurred together. Stephen smiled at an elderly African-American woman and introduced her as Miss Esther. Evan realized he recognized her from his hometown of Putnam. In fact, he was pretty sure he’d seen her at the Piggly Wiggly market and at a couple funerals.
Evan liked the way such an odd assortment of people had come together to celebrate Russ and Stephen’s wedding. He remembered what Stephen had said about gay people creating their own families, and he thought Stephen had done very well. It felt nice to be a part of it.
Wait staff came around to take drink orders and drop off platters of appetizers, and when they finished, Alan leaned in to speak to him. “How do you know my son and Stephen?”
Evan briefly mentioned how they met and about his abrupt arrival in Atlanta. Alan scowled. “What is wrong with all these damn parents?”
“I’m sorry?” Evan asked, a little confused.
“I know too damn many parents who’ve kicked their sons out for being gay, and I can’t figure out what the hell is wrong with them. How can they not want their children to find happiness like that?” He gestured toward Russ and Stephen across the table from them. Stephen had his arm around the back of Russ’ chair, and they were both laughing about something. Their gazes caught, Stephen’s eyes crinkling at the corners as he smiled. He leaned in to brush his lips across Russ’ cheek, and Russ pulled Stephen in to whisper something in his ear. “It’s hard enough to find love in this world, and the thought of tellin’ my son he’s wrong for wanting it makes no sense to me.”
Evan looked down at the white bread plate and excessive number of forks in front of him. “Want to go tell my parents that?”
Jeremy, who had apparently been paying more attention than Evan realized, put his hand on Evan’s knee. “I think I’m first in line to give them a piece of my mind for how they treated you.” Evan flushed at the contact and the protective note in Jeremy’s voice.
“Sure, but only if I get to say how I feel about your parents to their faces, Jeremy,” he replied. It still made him so angry that they’d abandoned Jeremy when he’d needed them most. “They’re worse than mine.”
“His too?” Alan shook his head and handed a huge plate of crab cakes over. “This is what I mean! It’s goddamn ridiculous.”
Evan turned his head and grinned at Jeremy. He liked Alan a lot and began to see where Russ’ personality had come from. He put some crab cakes on his plate before handing it over to Jeremy, who made a face and passed it on. Evan shifted so he could look Alan Bishop in the face. “You really never cared that Russ was gay?”
“Naw. Just changed things a bit. Parents—the decent ones anyway—worry about their kids. Russ being gay made me worry about different things. But, hell, I was pretty sure he was gay long before he’d worked it out in his head. There was some singer who turned into an actor. Can’t remember his name, but he was real popular when Russ was a kid. Russ was maybe five or so and he was glued to the radio or the TV screen whenever he was on.”
Evan grinned, wondering whom Alan was talking about. “You don’t remember his name?”
“Not off the top of my head.” He raised his voice so Russ could hear him. “Russ, who was the singer you had a crush on when you were little? He’s an actor now. Did the movie about the gold heist.”
Russ groaned and it was the first time Evan had ever seen him look embarrassed. “You had to bring that up, didn’t you, Dad?”
Alan chuckled and Stephen looked back and forth between them. “You aren’t talking about Mark Wahlberg, are you?”
Russ rubbed his forehead. “Yes.”
“Didn’t he have another name as a singer though?” Alan asked. “He was in some band or somethin’.”
“Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch,” Russ muttered.
Stephen burst out laughing. “Oh, Russ.”
“I was a kid! Trust me, now I wonder what the hell I was thinking.” Russ shook his head. “So embarrassing.”
Jeremy laughed. “I don’t know. I was a pretty big fan of him too. I was about twelve or thirteen when his Calvin Klein underwear ads came out. Trust me, I jerked—” he glanced at the elderly woman at the end of the table and cleared his throat “—err, found the ads very ... inspiring.”
Everyone at the table laughed, and Miss Esther had a small smile on her face that made Evan think that despite her age, she wasn’t exactly an uptight old lady.
“See, someone gets it.” Russ threw Jeremy a grateful smile. “When I was a kid, I might not have known why I liked him, but I knew I did.”
“Hell, I knew you did,” Alan said. “Russ just didn’t look at girls the way he did boys. My brother was gay, and I had a pretty strong suspicion Russ was too, but I didn’t see any point in bringin’ it up ’til he was ready. He thinks I don’t know about the times he snuck out to meet up with a guy that whole summer before he told me he was gay, but I knew that too.”
Russ buried his head in his hands. “I have no secrets, do I?” he muttered, and Stephen grinned and rubbed his neck.
“I like hearing them,” Stephen teased.
Jeremy sat back in his chair and crossed his arms. “Oh, I’d bet you have a few embarrassing crushes in your past too, Stephen.”
“You might be right.” Stephen gave Jeremy a wry grin. “Doesn’t mean I’m going to admit to them.”
“Aww, come on,” Jeremy coaxed. “You didn’t have a bachelor party. A few embarrassing stories at dinner seems fair.”
Russ grinned. “Yeah, I want to hear them, Stephen.”
Stephen sighed and shook his head. “I’m sure you all remember Dukes of Hazzard, right?”
“The one from the eighties, right, old man?” Jeremy teased, and Stephen rolled his eyes. Evan glanced over at Russ, who seemed amused rather than jealous of the banter between them.
“Yes, the one from the eighties. Not the ridiculous remake.”
“That was one hell of a car,” one of the men from Stephen’s work said.
Stephen grinned. “It was. Although I was more excited about Luke Duke. Never was a fan of blonds.” He ruffled the back of Russ’ hair affectionately, and Russ turned his head for a quick kiss.
“I’m afraid I was partial to Daisy,” Alan said, chuckling. “There wasn’t a man alive who didn’t want that car, and every straight man I knew wanted that woman.”
A couple of the guys at the other end of the table chimed in about their crushes on her, and the whole table began to reminisce about their own adolescent crushes as the appetizers were cleared away and massive bowls of salad were brought out.
Evan felt Jeremy’s hand on his forearm, and he turned to see Jeremy grinning. “Time to fess up about your embarrassing crush, Evan. I figured you’d be uncomfortable if I asked when the whole table was listening, but you at least have to tell me.”
“Thanks,” Evan said. He would have been embarrassed. And he definitely wasn’t admitting to Jeremy that his biggest crush was him. “Um, let me think ... I had a huge crush on Jake Gyllenhaal for quite a while. I—I found this bootleg copy of Brokeback Mountain online and watched it in my room so my parents wouldn’t know.” He swallowed, remembering how he’d felt afterward when he realized not much had changed since the sixties, at least not in Putnam. The rest of the world was changing now though. “I kinda thought that was how all gay relationships ended.”
Jeremy squeezed his shoulder. “Nah, not all of them.” Jeremy glanced across the table, and Evan’s gaze followed to see Russ and Stephen, who were absurdly, ridiculously in love. Jeremy turned back to face him. “You have good taste though. Nothing embarrassing about having a crush on Jake Gyllenhaal.”
Evan nudged Jeremy with his elbow. “What about you? I never heard yours.”
“I admitted to Mark Wahlberg,” Jeremy joked. “You want more?”
Grinning, Evan pressed further. “C’mon, tell me,” he coaxed. “I’m so curious who else.”
“Will Smith, okay?” Jeremy glanced over and rolled his eyes.
“He’s hot,” Evan said, confused by why that was embarrassing.
“Yeah, he is now. But this was in the Fresh Prince of Bel Air days when he was all skinny and awkward and his ears stuck way out. I totally had a thing for the stupid nineties backward baseball caps and baggy pants thing.”
Evan snickered. He’d seen the show a few times on TV, and Jeremy had a point. “That’s pretty bad.”
“So, let’s make this even. Tell me another crush of yours,” Jeremy coaxed.
“Hmm. I watched the X-Men movies all the time because I had a thing for Hugh Jackman as Wolverine. I guess I’ve kind of always had a thing for older guys with dark hair,” Evan admitted before he could stop himself.
Jeremy gave him a slow grin. “Is that so?”
Thankfully, Evan was saved from responding as the main courses arrived. Everything was served family style, so Evan took a healthy portion of shrimp and grits and braised beef.
When Jeremy struck up a conversation with Monty and Emily, Evan focused on eating for a while and let the conversation at the table flow over him.
Jeremy turned back to face him as the dinner plates were cleared away. “You doing okay, kid?”
Evan smiled at the nickname although it sent a little stab of sadness through him when he thought about the last time Jeremy had called him that. “Yeah, I’m good. Sometimes, I like listening to everyone for a while before I join in.”
“Okay. Just checking. I don’t want you to feel left out.”
“I don’t, but thanks for asking.” He felt warm inside knowing Jeremy was keeping an eye on him, that he cared if Evan was comfortable and enjoying himself. No one had ever done that for him before. His father had shouted at Evan for being too quiet, and kids had teased him for hanging back rather than joining in their loud, chaotic games. But other than a vague memory of a teacher in elementary school who seemed to understand that Evan didn’t always want to join in, everyone else had always pushed and shoved him into activities that made him uncomfortable and unhappy. Jeremy was outgoing, yet somehow, he never made Evan feel bad for being different.
Desserts arrived, whole trays of mini bites of cake and little cups of mousse, and Evan and Jeremy fought over the last coconut lemon cake. Jeremy finally gave in and handed it to him with an overdramatic sigh.
It made him stupidly happy, and he grinned at Jeremy after he finished it. “Thanks.”
“Good thing I like you, kid,” Jeremy grumbled, but his eyes twinkled. Evan couldn’t look away. For a few minutes, he completely forgot about how weird things had gotten between them. He was just happy to be sitting at a table sharing dinner with him as they celebrated the wedding of their friends.