epilogue

To: Kathryn Lowell, Associate Curator,
Hirshhorn Museum

From: Miriam Ariel Feldman

Dear Señor Picasso,

My name is Miriam Feldman, and I pushed your sculpture at the Hirshhorn. Perhaps you are wondering why anybody would do such a thing, but I think you of all people can understand, given that you married twice, had many mistresses, drove everybody crazy, and, in every portrait of you I have ever seen, you look like you never blink. As far as I can tell, you spent your life pushing things. Still, as my mother would say, that doesn’t mean that’s what I should be doing, and your sculpture certainly wasn’t mine to break. Also, since you are now the most famous artist in history, your work has gotten really expensive, and one can’t just go around knocking down expensive things every time one is mad.

Which brings me to the next part: why I did it. I have been thinking about this a lot, and it’s hard to put it into words, so I thought I would use pictures. I chose five pictures for you because my school counselor (who you would probably want to sleep with) asked me for five, and I thought it was a good number. I hope all the pictures together will tell the story of what happened. It helped me understand. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I thought I owed you the truth, artist to artist, if I may.

When we get critiqued, our photo teacher makes us say no more than three words about our work, but we can’t name anything that’s in there. Here goes.

The first is about falling in love.

The second is about losing.

The third is about holding on.

The fourth is about the truth.

The fifth is about hope.

I welcome whatever you bring my way, be it a life-long curse or a flood of insults, and I am ready to face it with grace, humor, and quite a bit of strength. You see, Señor Picasso, I know this may sound dramatic, but I think I was dying there for a while, or at least disappearing, and your sculpture changed everything. I am the one who pushed it, yes, but you are the one who made it. For that, you crazy bronze bender, I am forever grateful and at your service.

Yours, Miriam