Jerry Foltz, winner of the 1995 South Carolina Open, is a golf journalist and former touring professional who spent eight years on the Buy.com Tour. He is a weekly columnist for golfonline.com, and has been the on-course commentator for the Golf Channel since 1997.
How to Retrieve a Ball Lost in the Washer
Source: Frank Miller is a golf construction and industry consultant. He owns a sod farm and a golf green construction company in Kihei, Hawaii.
How to Tee Off in Front of a Crowd
Sources: Bruce Jackson of Inside/Out in Provo, Utah, is a specialist in performance psychology. His clients include athletes and business leaders • Jim Campbell is the Director of Golf, Cape Cod National Golf Club, Brewster, Massachusetts.
How to Retrieve a Ball Stuck in a Tree
Source: Michael Martinez is a professional tree climber and owner of Specialized Rigging and Tree Care, Inc., a company specializing in the care and maintenance of trees.
How to Retrieve a Ball from a Gopher Hole
Source: Frank Miller.
How to Scale a Fence to Retrieve a Ball
Source: Greg Gaffney is an eleven-year veteran of the Naples, Florida, police force, and an avid fence climber.
How to Play Out of a Water Trap
Source: Jim Campbell.
How to Play Out of High Saw Grass
Source: Mark Heartfield is the head golf professional at the Sankaty Head Golf Club in Siasconset, Massachusetts. In the winter he is director of golf at Orchid Island Golf and Beach Club in Florida.
How to Carom the Ball off a Wall
Source: Andrew Campbell is the assistant golf professional at the Merion Golf Club in Ardmore, Pennsylvania.
How to Thwart a Cheat
Source: John Morgan is a professional gambler and a confessed golf cheat who lives in Oakland, California.
How to Stop Thinking about a Horrible Shot
Source: Randall McCracken is a golf pro at Willow Creek Country Club in Salt Lake City, Utah.
How to Stop a Runaway Cart
Source: Mr. X, who prefers to remain anonymous, is a technical representative and trainer for one of the largest golf cart manufacturers in the world. He has worked with electric, gas, turf, and industrial carts for 14 years.
How to Get a Cart Out of a Sand Trap
Sources: Mr. X. • Chad Moore sells and services golf carts at Florida Southern Golf Carts in Brooksville, Florida. • Golf Cars, Inc. in the greater Philadelphia area, Pennsylvania.
How to Start a Dead Cart
Source: Mr. X.
How to Putt with a Driver
Source: Mark Blakemore is a Class A PGA professional with more than 19 years of golf instruction experience. He is the owner and operator of www.PGAProfessional.com, which features free golf tips and articles, handicap calculators, and other golf resources.
How to Drive with a Putter
Source: Mark Blakemore.
How to Keep Score without a Pencil
Source: Paul Attard is a PGA golf professional and is the head of golf at the Brooksville Golf & Country Club in Brooksville, Florida.
How to Get a Club Out of a Tree
Source: Warren Lehr is director of golf at Paa-Ko Ridge Golf Club in Sandia Park, New Mexico.
How to Survive If You Run Out of Tees
Source: Paul Attard.
How to Deal with an Alligator Near Your Ball
Source: Kent Vliet, Ph.D., is a faculty member of the Department of Zoology at the University of Florida, Gainesville. He serves as the Coordinator of Labs for the biological sciences program and has studied alligator behavior for twenty years.
How to Deal with a Snake Near Your Ball
Sources: Joseph B. Slowinski was an associate curator of herpetology in the Department of Herpetology at the California Academy of Sciences in San Francisco. He studied venomous snakes in Myanmar (Burma), where he collected cobras, Russell’s vipers, kraits, and sea snakes. • Guinevere Wogan is an assistant in the Department of Herpetology at the California Academy of Sciences.
How to Spot a Rabid Animal
Source: Centers for Disease Control.
Sources: Glen Needham, Ph.D., is the codirector of the Ohio State University Acarology Laboratory. • Janet Tobiassen, DVM, is a small-animal veterinarian with a doctorate in veterinary medicine from Oregon State University. She is a member of the American Veterinary Medical Association and serves as the Veterinary Medicine guide at about.com (vetmedicine.about.com).• The Lyme Disease Network of New Jersey, Inc., www.lymenet.org.
How to Survive a Bird Attack
Source: Patty Sprott is an ecologist who disseminates scientific findings of the Long Term Ecological Research Network, a National Science Foundation—funded program. She has studied and written about terrestrial/aquatic interactions among animals, wetland turtles, and bird attacks for the Florida Fish & Wildlife Department. She is online at www.lternet.edu.
How to Survive If You Hit a Beehive
Source: Eric H. Erickson, Jr., Ph.D., is director of the Carl Hayden Bee Research Center, part of the USDA’s Agricultural Research Service. He has 31 years of research experience and is the author of more than 150 scientific publications on honeybee biology and crop pollination.
Source: George Arrington has instructed classes in self-defense for more than 25 years. He holds a fourth-degree black belt and formal teaching license in Danzan-Ryu Jujutsu and has also studied Karate, Aikido, T’ai-chi Ch’uan, Pa Kua, and Hsing-I.
How to Control Your Golf Rage
Sources: Lawrence Arnold, M.D., is a licensed psychotherapist who lives San Bernadino, California. • www. angermgmt.com is a website devoted to anger management. • Victor Bartok is a stress management specialist who lives in New York City.
How to Prevent a Club from Flying Out of Your Hands
Sources: Wayne K. Clatterbuck is an associate professor in the department of Forestry, Wildlife & Fisheries at the University of Tennessee’s Agricultural Extension Service in Knoxville. • Warren Lehr.
How to Avoid Getting Hit by a Ball
Source: Randall McCracken.
How to Survive Being Hit in the Goolies
Sources: Roger Rosen, M.D., is a general practitioner who lives in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. • The American Red Cross First Aid and Safety Handbook by Kathleen Handal, M.D.
How to Carry an Injured Golfer
Source: James Li, M.D., practitioner in the Division of Emergency Medicine at Harvard Medical School in Cambridge, Massachusetts, is an instructor for the American College of Surgeons’ course for physicians, Advanced Trauma Life Support. He is the author of articles on emergency practice in remote settings.
How to Treat a Sprained Ankle
Source: James Li.
How to Treat a Blister
Sources: Roger Rosen. • The American Red Cross First Aid and Safety Handbook.
How to Treat Poison Ivy, Poison Oak, and Poison Sumac
Source: Susan Carol Hauser is the author of Outwitting Poison Ivy: How to Prevent and Treat the Effects of Poison Ivy, Poison Oak, and Poison Sumac, and Outwitting Ticks.She teaches writing at Bemidji State University in Minnesota and is online at www.intraart.com/hauser.
Sources: Roger Rosen. • The American Red Cross First Aid and Safety Handbook. • The Complete Idiot’s Guide to First Aid Basics. • James Li.
How to Avoid Dehydration
Source: James Li.
How to Avoid Lightning
Sources: Dave Rust, Ph.D., is a lightning expert at the National Severe Storms Laboratory in Norman, Oklahoma. • John Ogren is the Warning Coordination Meteorologist for the National Weather Service and a specialist in weather safety issues. • Thunderstorms, Tornadoes, Lightning . . . Nature’s Most Severe Storms, a joint publication of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, the U.S. Department of Commerce, and the American Red Cross.
How to Survive a Tornado
Sources: Harold Brooks is head of the Mesoscale Applications Group of the National Severe Storms Laboratory in Norman, Oklahoma. He has researched tornadoes and their effects on people for 15 years. • Federal Emergency Management Agency. • National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration.
How to Put Out a Cigar Brush Fire
Sources: The U.S. National Park Service. • www.fire wise.org is a website devoted to fire-fighting techniques.
How to Cure a Golf Addiction
Source: Adapted from resource material provided by Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous.
Rules and Regulations
Sources: USGA Official Golf Rules. • Rules of Golf by Tom Watson. • The Illustrated Golf Rules Dictionary by Hadyn Rutter.
The authors would like to extend their thanks and the promise of lifelong, good golf karma to all of the experts who contributed their knowledge and experience to this project. Without you we are nothing— or at least we’re a lot less knowledgeable.
Joshua Piven thanks all of the experts who contributed their time and golfing expertise, as well as the entire cast of the film Caddyshack for their inspiration, wisdom, and creative golf advice.
David “Fuzzy” Borgenicht thanks Jay Schaefer, Steve Mockus, Erin Slonaker, Terry Peterson, Brenda Brown, Joe Borgenicht, and the entire clubhouse at Chronicle Books and Quirk Productions. He would also like to thank his golf-nut grandmother, Helen Sandack, for not getting angry with him at age 10 when he “accidentally” hit her good golf balls into the road behind her house.
Jim Grace thanks his father, Bill Grace, for being an exceptional golfer, and an even better father. He also sends a huge “thank you” to the golf pros who took time out of their full summer days to answer his never-ending list of questions: Andrew Campbell, Jim Campbell, and Mark Heartfield. Finally, he would like to thank his wife, Lisa, and editor, Erin Slonaker, who now know more about golf than they ever wanted to.