I am sure most parents can attest to the pride they feel when they hear or see their child pass on something learned from them. We remember how that same child reacted initially when we taught them the lesson in question or showed them how their behavior was not something to be proud of – that they knew better. We remember the pout, the anger at being corrected or encouraged to do and be better.
“But he said it first,” or “But she took my toy first!” Words of defense and justification. Here is your daughter or son, however, teaching that very lesson to your grandchild, showing that what you said many years ago – the teaching – has not been ignored or even forgotten; that the words were taken in and continue to guide. That the wisdom is now being imparted to the next generation.
We feel pride, and some relief, to know that the wisdom we too received from those who came before us is being passed on. Maybe that is all we can hope for – that one generation will make sure the next knows how we are meant to live as human beings, caring for one another and respecting each other’s humanity. I am sure, then, that those of you who are parents and grandparents can imagine my joy in being asked to introduce a book by my granddaughter, Mungi, about a principle that has been central to my teachings to my children and our larger community.
Ubuntu is a concept that, in my community, is one of the most fundamental aspects of living lives of courage, compassion and connection. It is one that I cannot remember not knowing about. I understood from early on in my life that being known as a person with ubuntu was one of the highest accolades one could ever receive. Almost daily we were encouraged to show it in our relations with family, friends and strangers alike. I have often said that the idea and practice of ubuntu is one of Africa’s greatest gifts to the world. A gift with which, unfortunately, not many in the world are familiar. The lesson of ubuntu is best described in a proverb that is found in almost every African language, whose translation is, “A person is a person through other persons.” The fundamental meaning of the proverb is that everything we learn and experience in the world is through our relationships with other people. We are therefore called to examine our actions and thoughts, not just for what they will achieve for us, but for how they impact on others with whom we are in contact.
At its most simple, the teaching of this proverb and of ubuntu is similar to the Golden Rule found in most faith teachings: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!” But one who has ubuntu goes a step beyond that. It is not only our actions we are called to keep track of, but our very being in the world. How we live, talk and walk in the world is as much a statement of our character as our actions. One with ubuntu is careful to walk in the world as one who recognizes the infinite worth of everyone with whom he or she comes into contact. So it is not simply a way of behaving, it is indeed a way of being!
Everyday Ubuntu offers the reader a chance to reflect on the ways in which the practice of ubuntu can help us to be someone in the world who builds bridges, someone who sees each interaction as a chance to foster a more positive environment. The stories that Mungi shares are ones we can all relate to at one level or another. They are the everyday opportunities and challenges we are given to live in the world with ubuntu. On any given day, we are each offered many chances to be the person who – whether it be through words, actions, or even silence and inaction – offers space to those we encounter to experience care and relationship.
I am both proud and happy to be able to encourage you to read a book that introduces a philosophy that has meant so much to me, written by my own granddaughter. I believe that it will open your eyes, minds and hearts to a way of being in the world that will make it a better and more caring one.
God’s richest blessings.
Archbishop Desmond Tutu
Cape Town, South Africa
May 2019