I’d like to start with MLMs—the companies that prey on women and their desires for community, comradery, financial freedom, and hope. Their greed and lack of compassion brought me to a place in my life that was equal parts amazing and terrible. It was in this cultish world that I found an overwhelming need to show my support of others by shopping, spending, and giving all my time. It taught me to use credit cards, kit knap, and hide purchases from my husband. It also introduced me to the most wonderful, caring women—the MLM boss babes—who I’ll never forget and never stop supporting. It was here that I found friendships before the #writingcommunity.
To Alexandria, Kayla, and Abby, who encouraged me to chase all my writing dreams and funnel my energy into this—writing—rather than whatever direct sales company had my current attention with all its shimmering false promises. You ladies gave me permission to follow my path and step away. Thank you.
To Kate, who taught me that not all MLM tribes are yucky. You have always been a powerful being that won’t conform, instead, creating community for us outliers. You’re a goddess, always and forever. Thank you for being you and teaching me to accept me for me, and reminding all of us that our inner Bish deserves to shine.
To my #writingcommunity, I would be lost without you! Bianca, thank you for creating a podcast worth cussing about, then inviting Carly and CeCe to join you. The #TSNOTYAW community you ladies have created means so much, not only to me, but to many writers. Also, you brought me two very important people: Kat and Heather. For that, I’m eternally grateful.
To Kat, you are the meow! You’re one of the strongest people I know. Despite your eternal lack of sleep, you keep growing stronger every day. You are incredible and selfless. I’m so glad that I get to know you, and I’m honored you call me your writing bestie.
To Heather, I simply don’t know how I thought my world was complete before you. You are a light in my life and a brilliant writer! Thank you for trusting me to read your work when you didn’t know me. And thank you for loving me and accepting me, idiosyncrasies, and all.
To Jodi, I’m incredibly thankful for everything you have done, still do, and will continue to do for me. My writing is better because of you. You ask me the tough questions, then make sure I do the near-impossible work of answering them. More so, you accepted the part of me that was struggling, disorganized, and utter chaos, then taught me to own it. And I cannot wait to see Elizabeth in the world (the OG—I’m incredibly honored Elle gets to be her namesake).
To CeCe, thank you for pushing me to dig deeper, think harder, and create better stories. Thank you for making me see that spies are not the answer (not now, not ever). This story and my MCs are indebted to you for this. Elle and Olivia would be very different women without your intervention.
To my writing group, you ladies bring me joy with your stories, our discussions, and lasting friendships. You pulled me out of my hermit shell and onto Zooms, which I cherish!
Thank you, Lindsay, Megan, Bonnie, and the dynamic duo (Amanda and Lisa Marie), for all your wisdom and encouragement.
To all my beta readers (for this story and others), you helped bring this book and my writing to life, and I’m so very thankful for the time and thoughtful feedback you gave me. Jen, my P2P peep, I’m honored to know you. Keep sending me your romances to read and brighten
my days. Haley, keep dreaming and discovering yourself. You are remarkable, and your stories are magical. To the entire #TSNOTYAW community, thank you for your encouraging, funny, and supportive existence. Huck, you’re a positive glimmer in this writing world, and I’m so grateful for you. Kiersten, thank you for sharing your realities with me, and reminding me I’m not alone and sacrifices are acceptable (our children will appreciate us, and our pillows will last longer than their counterparts). Nidhi, you’ve taught me what strength and positivity really look like, infused with comic relief in tough times. Elaine, thank you for always smiling and asking the best, well-thought-out, and engaging questions—if I ever need to speak publicly, I hope you’re in the audience.
To Saida, thank you for always encouraging me and checking in on me. Thank you, friend, for always being in my corner. To Bre, thank you for always making time in life for me, and for allowing our friendship to never falter even when you don’t hear from me for extended periods of time. To my co-workers, Donna and Kristina, thank you for encouraging me to follow my dreams and find a semblance of work-life balance. To the countless people who checked in, encouraged, and motivated me, thank you.
To Alex and Tina, thank you for giving me a chance and helping me turn a story I love into something worth sharing with the world. Alex, thank you for believing in me and always being in my corner. Tina, I thought I knew what a challenging edit was, but then you showed me otherwise. Your edits, bred from honesty, morphed this book into what it is, and I’m eternally grateful for that. And both of you, thank you for being flexible, for understanding each writer is unique, and for adapting and adjusting to allow this book to change far beyond what any of us originally thought it would. Then, when I thought it couldn’t improve, you sent me a request for a “surprise” edit—and a surprise it is! You believed in me enough that you’d suggest one more round of revisions, and for that, I’m grateful. Add in the incredible Bonnie (who I’m eternally indebted to and thankful for) with her brilliance and selflessness in helping me brainstorm and restructure, and voila! This book is born. Thank you for giving me this chance and investing in me!
My family… I saved you for last because I knew I’d feel all the big emotions.
Mom, thank you for the many times you have helped (and no doubt will help) us with the kids, and for giving them the grace that, often, I cannot. Thank you for showing me that life isn’t all the hard things, but what we learn from those things, and how we recreate ourselves when we pick ourselves up from the rubble.
Dad and Jane, thank you for making me practice my spelling words a million times (no, I still can’t pronounce or spell some of them). Thank you for teaching me I need to pay the bills and find the balance between reality and dreams while also being on my side and believing in me. Jane, thank you for teaching me not to suppress my inner perfectionist but to, instead, use it for good. Dad, thank you for teaching me that it’s good to have a passion, that hyperfocusing on it is normal, and that it’s okay when new passions come along.
To my siblings:
Ashley, I love you. You deserve the world. In this story, Bella dog gets an alternate happy ending that I hope you’ll love.
To my brothers, all the buttons you’ve pushed have given me personality, dark inner dialogue, and a twisted sense of humor.
Tay, you and Sarah helped me create Elle, who is no doubt a little like you (Tay), in more than one way.
Austin, keep smiling, because it brightens the room.
Cam, you’re an incredible powerhouse and a human who sees everyone for who they are—accepting them and teaching the rest of us to be a little more open.
Kolton, thank you for flinging shit at me and allowing me to poorly attempt to sling it back (and Shawna, thank you for putting up with his ass).
Matty, you are stronger than you will ever know; please remember that, and that we love you so very much.
To my in-laws, Tracy, Kevin, Brittany, and Brett, thank you for believing in me, and understanding our chaotic life.
And to all the grandparents (mine and Mat’s), thank you for encouraging me and understanding the same of our always busy existence.
To my children, you three are everything wonderful and aggravating in this world. I needed each one of you, and I will continue to need you every moment of every day for the rest of my life. I’m so incredibly grateful I get to be your mom. I’d also be forever thankful if you allb would stay in bed at bedtime and not wake me up in the middle of the night. Love you!
To my husband, Mat. You are my biggest fan, and that’s everything to me. You encourage me, push me, and believe in me when nobody else in this world does. You make me do the hard stuff, and you encourage me to balance life. You never get upset when I hyperfocus—you just understand. You love me beyond words, which is an immense privilege. Thank you for always believing in me. I’m so lucky to have you as my partner. Loves!