An hour later, Jen returned to her room and kicked her heels off. Her feet hurt more than she was willing to admit. The dancing might not have been the wisest choice with her shoes. She grinned. But totally worth it.
She slipped out of her dress and hung it up. She paused at her bra and considered Madison’s invitation. She’d let thoughts of Rachel ruin her evening earlier than she’d planned. Fuck that. She’d come here alone on purpose to do what she wanted with who she wanted. At this point, she wasn’t sure if the scotch was talking, but she didn’t care. She wasn’t drunk; all her faculties were intact. She could still make sound decisions, but the more cautious side of her had already left the building. She didn’t have a swimsuit, but that didn’t matter. It would feel good to soak her feet in the pool. She pulled on a pair of shorts and a dark blue T-shirt before palming her room key and leaving her phone behind.
The pool was empty and the patio quiet. She suppressed her disappointment and then considered why she felt that way in the first place. What was she hoping would happen? A quick wedding hookup with someone half her age? The less reserved side of her responded with a resounding yes. And why not? She deserved a little recreation. She worked hard, and she was essentially a single parent. Considering the fact that her last two relationships had crashed and burned, having sex with no repercussions felt like a great idea.
The more conservative side reminded her that women in their twenties came with a lot of baggage, the kind she had already packed up ten years ago. She rolled her eyes at herself and muttered, “It’s only baggage if you pick it up.”
“Are you looking for Madison?”
Startled, Jen pulled her eyes from the rippling water and turned.
Kayla hefted a pair of sandals. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. We’re inside. Why don’t you join us?”
Jen wavered. “I don’t want to intrude.”
Kayla shook her head, and the beads in her hair clicked together. “You’re not. Come on.”
Jen took a deep breath and followed her.
Over her shoulder, Kayla said, “So you’re Jessie’s aunt?”
Jen caught up and said, “Yes. How do you know Jessie?”
“She dated my ex-boyfriend. When he dumped her the same way he dumped me, we became friends.”
Jen smiled. “Booty buddies. I can relate.”
Kayla laughed. “I’d never called it that, but it works.” She breezed through the French doors and opened her arms, holding her shoes aloft. “I return victorious.”
A round of cheers and whoops greeted her. Jen surveyed the group, mostly mid-twenties, more women than men, more people of color than white. Madison lounged in the circle. Jen watched her face change from amused to interested when their eyes met. Smiling, she scooted over and opened up a spot beside her.
Jen returned the smile and walked over.
Madison looked up. “I thought you went to bed.”
“I’m not that old.” Jen settled beside her. The cushion dipped and pushed her closer.
“I didn’t say you were.”
Kayla dropped on the other side, and the cushion dipped farther. Jen steadied herself on Madison’s thigh. Madison shifted, and Jen pulled her hand away. “Sorry.”
Madison moved her arm and slung it behind Jen along the couch. Jen slid closer, and Madison leaned in. “Much better.”
Smiling, Jen shook her head and listened to the conversation around her. She felt comfortable in a crowd. She could make small talk with anyone. This particular group was a bit younger than her normal crowd. Not that it bothered her in the least. Occasionally, Kayla or Madison would give her some context. But she kept quiet for the most part, content to soak up the feeling of Madison’s body against hers. About twenty minutes into another story and she’d gotten no further signals from Madison except that damn arm around her shoulders. She could feel the day catching up. She’d hit the bathroom and stay for another ten minutes before making her excuses.
She stood, and Madison asked why with her eyes. Jen leaned in and whispered, “Bathroom.”
Madison pulled back with a half smirk and nodded.
Puzzled by her reaction, Jen walked away. She had just finished on the toilet and was mid-wipe when the door opened, and Madison walked in.
“Oh!” Madison’s face turned red, and she backed right out of the room.
“Fuck.” Two simultaneous thoughts occurred to her. One, she’d forgotten to lock the damn door and two, Madison had thought Jen was sending her a signal. Suddenly, her odd look made sense. Jen shot off the toilet and yanked her shorts up in one motion, her balance a little more off than she was accustomed to. Opening the door, she stuck her head out. Madison was making her way down the hall. “Get in here.” Madison turned, and Jen waved her back.
Madison shook her head. “No, it’s okay. I’m sorry. I thought—”
Jen summoned her authoritative voice. “Now.” There was a moment when she thought Madison’s embarrassment might win out, but then it was gone.
Shutting the door behind them, Jen moved in front of Madison and turned on the sink. She washed her hands. Madison was staring at her in the mirror, a slight blush to her face.
Jen held her gaze while she dried her hands. “I think we need a little clarity in our signals.”
Madison shifted to give her more room, but Jen stepped into her space. Without her heels, they were almost the same height. Throwing her arms on Madison’s shoulders and tucking her hands behind her neck, Jen pulled her closer. “Is this what you want?”
Madison put her hands on Jen’s hips. Her eyes dropped to Jen’s lips. “Yes.”
“Then ask.”
“Are you as skilled a lover as you are a dancer?”
Jen’s breath caught at the question. Now that it was out there, there was no doubt where the end of this conversation would lead. Her heart rate sped up, and her voice came out much softer than she was expecting. “Do you want me to show you?”
* * *
Madison leaned in and breathed the word, “Yes,” across Jen’s lips before she kissed her. It was clumsy at first, finding the right tilt of her head, but then Jen moved one way, and she moved the other. And the awkwardness faded, replaced by a growing desire as her mouth moved of its own accord, nipping and pulling at Jen’s lips until Jen opened her mouth. Madison’s tongue dove inside and swirled around before pulling back. Jen took the lead then, moving in and out of her mouth as their hands roamed.
The door began to open just as Madison touched Jen’s stomach. Madison pulled back and threw her hand against the door, shutting it. She fumbled for the lock. “There’s someone in here.”
They listened for a moment, and then Jen opened the door and looked out. Grabbing Madison’s hand, she said, “Come on. Let’s go somewhere else.”
Madison followed her upstairs, her tongue slightly sore from the intense kissing session. Still holding Jen’s hand, she paused at the threshold of Jen’s room, unable to move forward. It was one thing to fantasize about sex with a stranger and another thing to go through with it.
Jen turned. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m good.” She forced a smile and stepped into the room, closing the door behind her.
Jen stared. “Are you sure?”
Madison swallowed, trying to figure out what was holding her back. It wasn’t her first time, and yet it had that same weightiness to it. A beautiful woman wanted to have sex with her, and she was paralyzed. Seeing Erika had brought up all her insecurities. She needed to get over herself and quick if she wanted this to happen. She kicked off her shoes and opted for a half truth. “Just a little nervous.”
Smiling, Jen hooked her hands into Madison’s belt and pulled her closer. “So I’m not another notch on your bedpost?”
Madison laughed. She’d only slept with three people. Only one of them was a onetime deal, the other two were long-term relationships. She didn’t hop into bed with people, even though she wished she did. It would hurt less when they dumped her. She was more concerned about being a notch on Jen’s bedpost, but she didn’t say so. “No.”
“Good. I hate being just a number.”
“You’re not.” Silencing her doubts, Madison pulled her closer and started kissing the line of her jaw up to her ear.
Jen groaned and tilted her head back. “That feels nice.”
Madison smiled against her neck and slid her hand under Jen’s shirt. She brushed against Jen’s bra strap a few times before she decided to take it off for an unobstructed feel.
Jen lifted Madison’s face and met her in a messy kiss. She pulled back halfway through, leaving Madison chasing her lips as Jen yanked her shirt and bra over her head. Madison paused and looked at Jen’s breasts. Her eyes widened at the intricate tattoos along Jen’s shoulders and upper chest. Jen had worn a fairly revealing dress earlier, and not a single tattoo had shown through.
“They’re my secret.” Jen stepped back and turned around. More artwork covered her back, centered along her spine and fanning out to the edges.
Madison brushed her fingers along the ink. “It’s gorgeous.” Bright bursts of color mixed with deep black lines in stylized patterns. She leaned in and placed a light kiss along a red blossom.
Jen reached behind and tangled a hand in Madison’s hair. She moved closer, trailing kisses along Jen’s shoulder blades. Jen leaned back and sighed. “You have a tender touch.”
Madison’s ego swelled. Erika had told her she was too clingy. Nuzzling Jen’s neck, she wrapped her arms around Jen’s waist and squeezed.
Jen turned and tilted Madison’s face toward her. “Did I say something wrong?”
Madison shook her head. “No. I’ve been called clingy.”
Jen’s mouth set, her features severe and foreboding. “Erika?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
Jen stopped her from pulling away. “It does. You’re a beautiful woman, and I want you to show me who you are.”
Jen’s words sank into Madison’s heart, and she pulled her into a searing kiss. Jen matched her intensity, and they moved back toward the bed, never letting their mouths and hands stray too far from each other. Madison yanked her shirt over her head and tossed it across the room. Jen shimmied out of her shorts and let them fall where she stood. Jen popped Madison’s button and unzipped her pants. Madison pushed her boxers down with her pants, toeing off her socks at the same time and kicked the whole pile off to the side.
Jen had her hands poised to take off the last bit of clothing between them when Madison reached out and said, “Let me.” Slipping her hands into both sides of the black lace panties, she pushed them down and sank to her knees. She helped Jen lift one foot and then the other before she took the panties and held them. “These are very nice.”
“Yeah. I picked them up in Chicago. They were a really good deal.” She rattled off a few other random details.
Madison glanced up and smiled. Jen’s face was flushed, and she had lost all the severity of her features.
She frowned. “What?”
“Do you always babble when you’re nervous?”
Jen made a face. “I do not babble.”
Madison twirled the panties in her hand. “So I really needed to know the whole history of these underwear.”
Jen bit her lower lip. “Probably not.”
“Sit down.”
Jen sat on the edge of the bed. Madison palmed her thighs and pushed her legs apart, revealing a dark tangle of hair and pink inner lips. She looked up at Jen and deliberately licked her own lips. Jen swallowed and clutched the side of the bed. Leaning in, Madison nuzzled Jen’s wiry hair and took a deep breath. Jen shifted in her hands, and her breath hitched.
Sticking out her tongue, Madison opened Jen’s outer labia and took a tiny lick.
Jen gasped and rocked forward. Madison moved closer and took another lick. Jen’s breath stuttered. Madison liked that sound and wanted to hear it again. She took successively longer and longer swipes, punctuated by breaks and that breathy sound Jen made.
Jen gripped her hair and forced her to look up. “Stop teasing.” Her whisper ended in a tone bordering on a beg. “Please.”
Madison felt her own wetness increase with that one word. Lifting one of Jen’s legs over her shoulder, she leaned in and licked her entire labia, running up and around the outer petals. She made a few passes across her clit once, twice, before moving down toward her opening. Jen’s insides clutched at her tongue, holding it in place before letting it go.
Madison licked Jen’s center, up and around again and again, while Jen’s hips rocked toward her. Madison moved faster, trying to keep up. Pulling almost painfully on Madison’s hair, Jen gasped and convulsed under her hands and her lips. Madison kept licking until Jen muttered, “Stop.”
A little worried, Madison pulled back. “Are you okay?”
Jen groaned. “Yes. Just too much. Come here.”
Too much? She climbed up on the bed and laid next to her. Did she not like it? Jen had her eyes closed, taking deep breaths. Did she wear her out? She was older. Madison was so lost in her thoughts she jumped when Jen rolled over and threw her leg across Madison’s body.
“Did I startle you?” Jen smiled and inched closer.
Madison turned and faced her. Jen’s brown eyes traveled up and down Madison’s body, as if looking for ways to uncover her secrets. She shivered in anticipation.
Running her hand down Madison’s side, Jen’s eyes darkened and she said, “Tell me what you like.”
Madison closed her eyes at the touch. “I like your hands touching me.”
Jen shifted and straddled Madison’s hips. Her fingers splayed across Madison’s stomach and moved toward her breasts—featherlight touches that soothed and aroused. Madison lost herself in the sensation, growing wetter with each touch that moved lower and lower. “What else?”
Madison struggled to recall what she was asking.
“What else do you like?” Jen persisted.
“Your mouth—” She gasped when Jen’s lips captured her nipple and sucked. She arched her back. Jen switched nipples, sucking and pulling before alternating kisses with light nips down Madison’s torso. She kissed along her lower stomach, and Madison jerked her hips. Running her hand up Madison’s body, she cupped Madison’s breast and squeezed. She kissed her center and then opened her up.
Jen’s tongue touched her everywhere, lingering licks and quick flicks, gentle suction and hard pulling. She lost track of individual touches, succumbing to the overwhelming sensations, and her orgasm grew until it crashed out and over her.
Jen crawled up her body and kissed her. Madison tasted herself on her mouth, which turned her on more. Jen pulled back with a grin. “What else do you like?”
* * *
“Fuck. Fuck. Ah…” Jen came with three of Madison’s fingers inside her and flopped back on the bed, pulling Madison with her.
“Whoa, wait.” Madison slid out of her and slumped against her.
“Umph.” Jen groaned.
“Sorry.” Madison moved on to her stomach, worried she’d hurt her.
Jen glanced at her. “So not graceful.”
Madison felt mildly embarrassed but didn’t care. Hours of nonstop sex had her endorphins pumping overtime. “I didn’t hurt you?”
Jen sighed. “No, I’m good.” She chuckled. “You’re good.” She yawned, and Madison followed suit.
Madison lay on her stomach and drifted half-awake, half-asleep. In that twilight state, soft kisses brushed along her spine, and she hummed. “That feels nice.”
The movement continued up toward the nape of her neck. Fingers brushed her hair to the side, and Jen whispered in her ear. “I like this color. It suits you.”
Smiling, Madison started to roll over, but Jen held her still. Leaning in to kiss her, Jen said, “I want you like this.”
Madison shuddered at Jen’s voice, the tone and the command behind them. Jen’s hands slid down her back and over her ass, gripping and massaging her cheeks. She clenched her ass, anticipating her next move. Her sleepiness faded and left her with a different and deeper arousal than before. Vulnerability gave way to desire. The feeling of Jen hovering over her increased her awareness as Jen’s fingers moved down toward her opening. Lying along her back, Jen kissed her just below her earlobe and pushed a finger inside her. “So wet.”
Madison groaned and bucked her hips.
Jen thrusted and added another finger. “Is this okay?”
Madison arched her back and gripped the sheets. She nodded.
“Good, because I want to fuck you.” Jen kissed her shoulder blade and pulled away.
Jen kept up the pace, pushing in and out, in and out, with a speed that left Madison unable to focus on anything but the fingers inside her. Jen’s other hand slipped around Madison’s waist and brushed along her clit.
“Oh yes.” Madison curled into Jen’s body.
Jen kissed her ear. “Do you like that?”
She nodded, eyes closed now, and said, “Don’t stop.”
Jen pushed her back down, and her fingers twisted inside and set up a corkscrew motion that made her toes tingle. She came hard and quick. She tried to move, but all her strength had left her. She tried to speak, but the words would not come. She fell asleep to the steady sound of Jen’s breathing.
She woke to a shrill ring and a muffled hello. The mattress dipped, and Jen got out of bed. She closed her eyes and started to drift off again.
But she woke up at the words, “I’ll be home in an hour.” Totally disoriented, she tried to match the words with the voice. Erika always had to be home, but this was Jen. Suddenly, everything about the night before felt suspect.
Jen touched her back, and she pretended to be asleep. She heard Jen sigh.
Her heart sank while she listened to Jen quietly pack up. Who did Jen have waiting for her at home? She felt so stupid, pretending that this one night was the start of a different pattern, a new her, but it was just the same old reality. She should have known better; all her life she’d been second best. She waited until Jen left before she got up.
In the bathroom, she found a note tucked next to the soap. Even Jen’s handwriting was a reflection of her, bold and sharp. “Sorry I had to leave. My son is sick. I had a good time, and I’d love to go dancing again.”
She’d left her number. Madison read it twice. Son. After Erika, anyone with a family was a nonstarter. She crumpled it up and tossed it in the trash.