Once upon a time there was a bad pirate.
The bad pirate drove around in an old truck,
which had huge black wheels,
a sixteen million fish-power engine
and a whole load of bombs in the back.
The pirate had a pet white pointer shark
that rode on the front of his truck.
If the pirate took a dislike to somebody
—which happened all the time—
the pirate would
throw bombs at them,
and if that didn’t work,
the pirate would say
‘KILL!’
and the shark
would leap
off the truck
and bite
them
in half.
And that
was pretty much
the pirate’s life—
just driving around
throwing bombs and ordering shark attacks
on the unfortunate townspeople and, every
now and then, capturing a ship and stealing all the
chocolate.
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But one day the pirate and the shark heard a loud roaring noise. |
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It had |
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It had |
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It had big sharp blood-dripping teeth. |
But the pirate just smiled,
grabbed some bombs
from the back of the truck
and threw them at the dinosaur.
The first bomb
blew off its legs.
The second bomb
blew off its arms.
The third bomb
blew off its head.
And the dinosaur—or what was left of it—went
crashing down to the ground.
‘Good boys,’ said the pirate patting the remaining
bombs. But while the pirate was doing this,
the dinosaur put its
arms back on . . .
and then it put
its legs back on . . .
and then it put
its head back on.
The pirate heard a loud roaring noise and looked up
to see the huge dinosaur once again charging up the road
towards the truck. But the pirate just laughed and said
to the shark, ‘KILL!’
The terrifying shark launched itself off
the bonnet of the truck,
flew through the air
and bit the dinosaur’s heart right
out of its chest.
Then
the shark
bit off its legs.
Then
the shark
bit off its arms.
Then
the shark
bit off
the dinosaur’s
head.
And the dinosaur
—or what was left of it—
went crashing down to the ground.
‘Good shark,’ said the pirate, patting the shark’s head.
But while the pirate was doing this
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the dinosaur put |
and then it put
its head back on.
This time the pirate
didn’t smile
OR laugh.
The bombs hadn’t worked.
The shark hadn’t worked.
The dinosaur was indestructible!
The dinosaur stood above
the pirate’s truck,
and
opened
its
jaws
wide.
But then a curious thing happened.
Instead of swallowing the pirate,
the truck and the shark whole,
it said,
‘Hey, wanna
play football?’
The pirate said,
‘Sure, but I don’t have a football.’
And the
dinosaur said,
‘No problem, we can use the shark!’
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| And before the shark could protest, the dinosaur picked it up and kicked it to the pirate, who kicked it back, and they played shark football for the rest of the afternoon. |
And
after dinner
they raced each other
in their trucks until it was time for bed.
THE END
