HAVING CELEBRATED HER ESCAPE from the company at Grosvenor Square, Helena was dismayed when, halfway through the musicale the Darnell ladies attended after dinner, she looked up to see the Standish party arrive.
The group halted at the entrance to the refreshment room where their hostess had escorted her guests while the second set of musicians tuned their instruments. Though Charis and Lady Darnell at once walked over to greet Adam and his fiancée, Helena hesitated, not sure she could force herself to be polite to Priscilla three times in one day.
To her surprise, Miss Standish and Lady Cordelia waved and began walking toward her.
Satisfied as Helena was to have put a scare into Priscilla’s cousin, she doubted Francis would have had time to warn Priscilla not to trifle with her again. Still, how much damage could she do in a drawing room? Helena need only parry the girl’s falsely sweet words without losing her temper—difficult as that might prove.
“Dear Miss Lambarth,” Priscilla said as they reached her, “we have yet to manage a comfortable cose today. Shall we rectify that omission? Cordelia told me of the extraordinary adventures you were relating at dinner.”
“I recounted some incidents about which I had read.”
“And you are so well-read,” Priscilla commented. “Charis tells me you are studying philosophy—in Greek!”
“Even if Papa were to permit me to examine such a heathenish tongue, which I’m sure he would not,” Lady Cordelia interjected, “I should never presume myself clever enough to study a subject normally reserved for gentlemen.”
Tired of hearing what females were or were not supposed to do—and under no obligation to be conciliating to Lady Cordelia—Helena said, “How fortunate that you recognize your limitations.”
Lady Cordelia flashed her a look full of animosity. “But I understand you are more enterprising than a gently bred female in many ways, Miss Lambarth.”
“Indeed,” Priscilla said. “Traveling all the way to London on the common mail coach—without even a maid!”
From the periphery of her vision, Helena noted other guests drawing near, heads inclined to catch the conversation. Miss Standish had aimed enough barbed comments at her during various afternoon calls—when Adam was not present—that his fiancée’s hostility to Helena was probably well known.
Why not give all these eager observers the show they were expecting? Helena thought. Having worn out her patience for ignoring Priscilla’s baiting during their previous meetings today, she replied, “I rode on the roof, too. You mustn’t omit that little detail.”
“But that wasn’t the boldest of her adventures!” Lady Cordelia said. “Priscilla, did you not tell me Miss Lambarth actually prowled about London at night, disguised as a boy? Oh!” she exclaimed, putting a hand to her lips with a look of mock dismay. “Dear me! I forgot I wasn’t supposed to mention that. Pray, excuse me, Miss Lambarth!”
Someone gasped and the matrons nearest them froze. A sudden silence spread across the room, until even Darnell and Lord Blanchard, conversing near the door, looked up.
Miss Standish glanced at Helena, both anxiety and triumph in her eyes. “Oh, I’m sure ’twas all a hum—wasn’t it, Miss Lambarth?” she said nervously.
“No, it wasn’t!” Lady Cordelia interposed. “Priscilla, you swore to me ’twas absolute truth!”
Stricken to realize that Darnell must have divulged her escapade to his fiancée, Helena studied the girl, who seemed unable to decide whether she was glad or sorry to have her betrayal of Darnell’s confidence revealed. But though Miss Standish had offered her a possible avenue of escape, Helena never considered taking refuge in a lie.
Besides, true or not, when added to her previous social missteps, the allegation alone would probably achieve Miss Standish’s obvious desire: creating an on-dit scandalous enough to permanently discredit the girl she perceived as her rival.
“Why, no, Miss Standish, ’twas quite true,” Helena replied calmly. “I even watched the horse of Lord Blanchard’s friend outside White’s.” Gesturing toward the diplomat, she switched into the tones of one of Dickon’s street mates. “’Old yer ’orse fer a copper, me lord?’”
In the now silent room, her words carried clearly to every guest. While Lord Blanchard’s jaw dropped, Helena watched shock and disbelief wash over the faces of those nearest her. Despite her paucity of experience, she knew there were limits to the eccentricities Society would excuse because of her wealth. In the outraged or dismayed looks she was now receiving, she read that she had just bypassed those limits.
But when her defiant gaze met Lady Darnell’s stricken face, she realized her downfall would not be hers alone.
Not unless she acted quickly to distance herself from the family that had become so dear to her. Already Charis, recovering from Lady Cordelia’s pronouncement, had stepped in her direction, while Adam, a furious scowl on his face, was striding toward her.
Before he could reach her, she said softly for Priscilla’s ears alone, “If you expended as much passion trying to please Adam as you have in disparaging me, you’d both be much happier.”
Meanwhile, like marionettes controlled by the same strings, the rest of the guests drew back. Stepping forward to intercept Adam, Helena said urgently, “Don’t bother about me! Tend to Aunt Lillian and Charis.”
“You can’t think I’ll just abandon you—”
“Please, Adam! Don’t let my disgrace become theirs.”
For a moment he hesitated. Then, recognizing the truth of her words, he nodded. “All right—for now. But don’t think this is over yet.” After giving her hand a quick squeeze, he proceeded past her to his fiancée.
With a withering glare, Adam clamped a hand on Priscilla’s arm and led her toward Charis, Lady Cordelia scurrying after them. Standing alone in the center of the floor, Helena could almost see opinions that had been teetering between amusement and censure turn against her.
How sad Society is, she thought. All these people so trapped by their ridiculous code of rules that matrons and suitors who had flattered her and solicited her company a moment ago no longer dared meet her gaze.
Even Lady Jersey, after giving Helena a tiny, pitying shake of her head, turned away without speaking. Other guests hastened to follow her example. Helena was wondering whether she should wait until they had all exited before departing herself when a voice rang out.
“Pray, Miss Lambarth, lend me your arm.”
Helena turned to see Lady Seagrave approaching her. After first encountering the woman in Lady Jersey’s parlor, Helena had often noticed Lady Seagrave watching her when they chanced to be at the same gathering, had even exchanged a few words with her at several functions. Toward the mother of the wild young man Helena’s mother had loved and fled to, Helena felt some of the same mix of gratitude and resentment she’d always harbored for the son.
Those emotions gave way to puzzlement as Lady Seagrave reached her side. Had the exile of Gavin Seagrave for killing a jealous husband in a duel made his mother sympathetic to other victims of scandal? Helena wondered.
“Madame.” Helena curtseyed to the older woman.
Lady Seagrave placed her hand on Helena’s arm. “I find the room has grown suddenly…chilly. I wish to return home. Would you drive with me, please?”
Helena, too, had to get home—and it would not be wise to count on claiming a seat in the Darnell carriage. Still curious why Lady Seagrave was suddenly befriending her, Helena said, “Are you sure you dare take me?”
The older woman smiled. “Are you sure you dare leave with me? Yes? Then let us go.” Murmuring her thanks to their still speechless hostess, Lady Seagrave clasped Helena’s arm and guided her firmly out of the room.
As if by agreement, neither spoke until they were seated in the carriage. “Thank you for your assistance, Lady Seagrave,” Helena said. “If you would set me down at Darnell House, I should be most appreciative.” She smiled sardonically. “I expect it would be prudent for me to begin packing at once.”
“Don’t you wish to know why I intervened?”
Helena shrugged and raked the woman with a scornful glance. “Because it amused you?” she suggested.
To her surprise, tears began to glimmer in the older woman’s eyes. “Ah, how like him you look—full of scorn and ready to defy the world! So like your father.”
Helena stiffened. “I would thank you not to liken me to Lambarth, madame.”
Lady Seagrave smiled through her tears. “Never would I do so, my dear! I meant your true father—my son Gavin.”
“My true—! Helena gasped. For a moment, shock held her immobile. “Are you claiming that Gavin Seagrave is my father?” she demanded at last.
Lady Seagrave nodded. “Indeed I am. ’Tis a rather long story. Why don’t you come home with me and let me tell it to you?”
Numb with astonishment and silenced by an incoherent jumble of disbelief, grief and curiosity, Helena allowed Lady Seagrave to conduct her to her North Audley Street town house and shepherd her up to her parlor.
When they were both settled, Lady Seagrave began, “From his earliest years, Gavin was wild—passionate, impulsive, ready to fight at the first perceived slight, just as quick to forgive. He’d wooed his share of ladies, but when he met your mother, they fell instantly and completely in love. From that moment Diana favored only Gavin, ignoring Vincent Lambarth, who had courted her for months. Though her family—your late grandparents—thought Gavin too unsteady and refused his suit, she would have wed him anyway—if not for the duel.”
Lady Seagrave sighed. “A trumped-up affair. To protect her actual lover, the married lady in question named Gavin as her paramour, expecting he would deny it and that her husband would let the matter drop. But once insulted, Gavin insisted on having satisfaction. They met, the husband died and Gavin had to flee England.”
“So what makes you think he’s my father?”
“Diana, as you could imagine, was heartbroken at Gavin’s sudden departure. Then within the week, her family announced she was to marry Lambarth. Even at the time I thought the unseemly haste more than just an attempt to distance her from Gavin’s disgrace, but being persona non grata to the Foresters, I was not permitted to see her. Even if I had, suspecting what I did, how could I urge her to refuse Lambarth and wait for Gavin, when neither of us knew where he was or when we might hear from him again? By the time he did contact me, ’twas too late. Diana had married Lambarth and gone with him to Cornwall.”
“All you’ve told me are your own suspicions,” Helena said flatly. “Have you any real proof?”
“Patience, my dear. After a few years, I heard there was a child. I kept hoping Lambarth would bring the family to London, but he never did. Then my son contacted me, saying he’d sent agents into Cornwall to check on your mother and learned she was grievously unhappy. He was determined to rescue her and her child, and take them back to the estate he’d settled in the Caribbean. As you know, that rescue was not entirely successful. It wasn’t until after his men brought the hysterical Diana to him that she told him the child she’d borne—the child they’d failed to free—was not Lambarth’s daughter, but his.”
“Mama told him that?” Helena demanded.
“Yes.”
“You swear this is the truth?”
“I swear it.”
“But…” Helena shook her head. “Mama wrote me letters—many, many letters over the years. Not even when she knew she was dying did she inform me Lambarth was not my real father. Why would she not, if it were true?”
“After their second rescue attempt failed, Diana and Gavin believed Lambarth when he vowed he would see you dead before he would relinquish you. Not daring to attempt another rescue, Gavin engaged the best lawyers in England to find some legal way for Diana to wrest you from Lambarth. But as his acknowledged daughter, legally they could do nothing. So Lambarth had his revenge, making them live knowing he held Diana’s beloved child in his power.”
“That still doesn’t explain why Mama didn’t tell me in one of her letters. Or why you are only now coming forward, when I have met you on several occasions.”
“Since Lambarth refused to divorce Diana or release you, what point would there have been in telling you? Your parents’ only hope was that you would survive until Lambarth was dead or incapacitated enough that you could be freed. Then, as either heiress of Lambarth’s estate or in possession of the fortune Diana had amassed, you could claim a respected place in Society. A place that would never be granted the illegitimate daughter of a man who’d fled England in disgrace.
“For the same reason,” she continued, “I dared not show too much interest in you, for though in voice and profile you favor Diana, in coloring and stature you are all Gavin. The resemblance would be only too obvious had he not been absent from England for so many years. Even now, ’tis striking enough that some might recall the old scandal and remark upon it, were I to spend much time in your company. And so…I watched from a distance, my heart breaking that Gavin was not here to see you. That I could not claim my only grandchild as my own.”
Still not sure she believed it, Helena said wryly, “A grandchild who has caused a scandal nearly as great as the one created by the man you say is my father. Are you sure you want to acknowledge me?”
“Oh, my dear, selfish as it is of me, I rejoice in your scandal! Were it not for Miss Standish’s knavery, I should never have allowed myself to approach you. And if you wish to attempt a recover, I shall still let our relationship go unacknowledged. But I could not do so without, just this once, seizing the chance to let you know the truth. But here I’m rattling on, when I meant to show you this first.”
Taking Helena’s hand, she led her out of the parlor, down a hall and into a small, elegant sitting room. Gesturing to the portrait of a young man that hung over the mantel, she said, “Your father, Gavin Seagrave.”
Helena felt her breath leave in a rush. But for the gender of the subject, as she gazed at the man’s snapping dark eyes, curly black hair, tall frame and arrogant tilt of chin, she might almost be looking in a mirror.
It all made sense—perfect, awful sense. Lambarth’s rage, the beatings, his twisted desire to keep her a prisoner he seemed at once to both want and despise.
She turned to Lady Seagrave. “Did Lambarth know?”
“Though he, too, was dark-haired and dark-eyed, he must at least have suspected. Did…did he treat you badly?”
Badly. The small word did not begin to encompass what the man she’d called father had done to her. Curling her damaged hand into its glove, she said simply, “Yes.”
Lady Seagrave closed her eyes, as if receiving a blow. “My dear child, I am so sorry. ’Twas your mother’s darkest torment, to think of you all alone at Lambarth’s mercy. Forgive me! If I had insisted on seeing Diana before she married him, perhaps I could have somehow prevented it.”
Vowing to conceal what she had suffered, Helena took Lady Seagrave’s hand. “With only suspicions, you could have done nothing. Nor should you reproach yourself now.”
Lady Seagrave smiled tremulously. “Thank you, my dear. Knowing the truth, you still have a choice. For all her flightiness, Lillian Darnell is a clever lady. If you wish it, I’m sure she can figure out a way to salvage your reputation. It might be best to maintain the fiction that I am simply an acquaintance who, having weathered scandal before, felt sympathy for you tonight. It will be enough for me that you know you are my grandchild.”
“I have no intention of letting Aunt Lillian risk any more of her social standing trying to redeem me. I shall leave Darnell House tomorrow as soon as I can pack my things. And if…if you will have me, I should like to stay with you until I decide what to do next.”
“Are you certain?” When Helena nodded, tears brimmed once again in the older woman’s eyes. “Nothing would give me greater pleasure. Why not send a note to Darnell House telling them you will stay the night? Oh, I have so much to tell you!”
COMING GROGGILY AWAKE THE NEXT morning in a strange room, it took Helena a few moments to remember where she was. She’d managed only a few hours of sleep after sitting up nearly until dawn listening to Lady Seagrave describe everything she knew of the love between Diana and Gavin, their reunion after Gavin’s rescue and their life together.
Her parents had wed under local Caribbean law, but to their grief had no more children. Having amassing wealth as a privateer, Gavin settled down after their marriage to become a successful shipper of rum and sugar. Tapping his network of trading partners and some less respectable contacts from his days on the high seas, he had watched and waited for the day the daughter he dare not acknowledge could be freed.
She was still marveling at these revelations when Lady Seagrave entered bearing a tray of hot chocolate.
“Good morning, my dear! I would have let you sleep longer, but you said you wished to be up early.”
“Thank you,” Helena replied, accepting a cup. “But you must be tired, too. You shouldn’t have waited on me.”
“You would have me send a maid? Indeed not! I needed to make sure you were truly here and not just a dream.”
“I am quite real…Grandmama,” Helena said shyly.
Tentatively Lady Seagrave reached out her arms. Helena let the woman enfold her in a hug, then clung to her in a wave of gladness. She was finally free of Lambarth, of the man whose cruelty had caged her spirit much more successfully than his castle walls had imprisoned her body.
Lady Seagrave’s eyes were moist as she released Helena. “So, have you decided yet what you wish to do?”
“Not precisely. I must remove from St. James Square and it would probably be best if I left London.”
“You are sure you do not wish to attempt repairing your reputation? Lillian Darnell can work wonders.”
“No, I’ve seen enough of Society to feel certain I shall get along quite well without it. My only regret is my scandal must cause problems for the Darnell family. Otherwise, I am ready to go elsewhere.”
She couldn’t bear remaining to witness her beloved Adam married to Priscilla Standish, even at the distance of a news item in the Morning Post. It hurt too much to imagine him wed to a gloating Priscilla or to envision how living with his bride’s pettiness might slowly stifle his warmth and compassion, until the choice honor dictated narrowed into naught but the bitter fulfillment of duty.
“Should you like to travel?” Lady Seagrave interrupted her dark thoughts.
Helena shrugged listlessly. “Perhaps.”
“If you are certain you wish to acknowledge our connection, would you consider sailing to St. Kitts? There could be no greater joy for my son than to finally meet the daughter he has loved and longed for all these years.”
The Caribbean—far from Adam and the heartache of knowing he could never be hers. Certainly she was curious to know the man her mother had loved, whom she resembled so closely and had just discovered to be her father. Maybe Gavin, who had borne grief and loss himself, could teach her how to endure it. “I believe I should like that.”
“Wonderful! And you will stay with me until arrangements can be made?”
“I will return tomorrow after I have…taken leave of the Darnell family,” she said, those few words barely hinting at the heartache performing them would cause.
“Excellent!” Lady Seagrave cried. “Enjoy your chocolate then, my dear. I shall visit Gavin’s London office immediately to see what can be arranged. Ring if my staff can assist you with anything.”
After agreeing to meet for dinner, Lady Seagrave left. The note Helena had sent to Darnell House the previous night had instructed Nell to bring fresh garments this morning. While she waited for the girl, she would write some additional notes.
To Aunt Lillian, apologizing again for the scandal she’d caused and telling her she would return this evening after the ladies went out to collect her things. To Lady Jersey, asking that she not hold Helena’s transgressions against the Darnell family. To Mr. Pendenning, saying she would call this afternoon to discuss plans for her future.
But to Adam she would write nothing. Instinctively she knew he would wait for her tonight, that he would not let her depart without seeing her one last time. She both longed for and dreaded that meeting.
Uncertainty might cloud her future, but one fact was blue-sky clear. Now that she knew not a drop of the blood in her veins came from a wretch depraved enough to beat, starve and imprison a child, there was one last thing she meant to do before leaving London.
Though she would not attempt to trick the man whose honor she so admired into breaking his betrothal vows, while Adam Darnell was still unmarried, she was quite prepared to compromise his honor just enough to seduce him. Before she was forced to abandon him to a loveless marriage, she would give him one night of joy in the arms of a woman who loved him completely.
And if time permitted before she returned to Darnell House, she would seek out the courtesan she’d once seen in the park and ask her the best way to pleasure a gentleman.
AFTER COMPLETING HER ERRANDS and returning to share a simple dinner with Lady Seagrave, Helena was about to set out on her last, most important mission when Nell came in, announcing that Mr. Dixon had called for her.
Though she had assured Nell and Dickon that Lady Darnell would find them other positions after she left, with a loyalty that warmed Helena, both affirmed they would rather follow their mistress, regardless of where she settled. Far from reluctant to leave the city of his birth, Dickon had expressed a great enthusiasm for visiting the island realm of planters and privateers.
Her thoughts consumed by her approaching rendezvous with Adam, Helena’s first impulse was to tell Nell to send her caller away and proceed immediately to the address in Covent Garden her disapproving maid had charged Dickon to obtain. The courtesan, Dickon had obligingly discovered, would soon be leaving to meet her lover at the opera.
But Mr. Dixon had been her friend from her first Society appearance. His seeking her out after last night’s disgrace could only mean he intended to offer his support. She couldn’t repay his loyalty by avoiding him.
Resigned to postponing the meeting with the courtesan, Helena cheered herself with the reflection that, under the terms of her bargain with Mr. Dixon, perhaps she might ask him a few of the questions she’d intended to address to the pleasure woman.
When Helena entered the parlor moment later, her caller rose and came over to kiss her hand fervently.
“My dear Miss Lambarth! How I regret that a dull dinner engagement at my great-aunt’s prevented me from attending the musicale last night. I should not have left you standing in the middle of the floor, I assure you! I can’t imagine why Darnell was so hen-hearted!”
“Thank you, Mr. Dixon, but you mustn’t think badly of Adam. Knowing he needed to protect the reputations of the ladies of his own family, ’twas I who demanded he leave me and see to them. Then Lady Seagrave offered her help.”
“Did you really hold Blanchard’s friend’s horse outside White’s? ’Od’s blood, I wish I had seen it!”
“Yes, but enough said of that.”
“Indeed, ’twas the talk of the clubs! I can’t imagine another female skilled or intrepid enough to do so.”
“Certainly not a lady,” Helena observed dryly. “Instead of discussing that, may I presume once again upon your friendship and ask some rather indelicate questions?”
His eyes lit and he grinned. “Absolutely!”
Thinking about the strange excitement that had filled her when Adam’s lips touched hers, she said, “What is it about kissing that makes men desire it?”
Though Mr. Dixon reddened, he gamely replied, “Kissing—and other forms of affection that proceed from it—are…profoundly pleasurable. Shall I show you how much?”
Ignoring the offer, she continued, “Were I to kiss you, how could I make the experience…more pleasurable?”
As she waited expectantly, his face turned scarlet. She was about to conclude she had exceeded even his tolerance when at last he said, his voice a throaty rasp, “You could let me draw you close, so that I felt the whole length of your body against mine. Open your lips, so that I might touch your tongue with my own.”
“Doing so would make you want…more?”
His exhaled a gusty breath. “Merely looking at you makes me want more. But if you wish a tutorial on kissing, I am much better at showing than describing.”
“You…want to kiss me?”
“More than I want my next breath.”
Regretting now that her inflammatory questions had obviously ignited his desire, she thought perhaps she owed him a kiss. A goodbye kiss for a faithful friend.
Perhaps a kiss that would show her whether her passion could be aroused by one man only.
“Kiss me, then.”
He moved quickly to take her in his arms. Thankfully he did not try to bind her against him and his lips, though insistent, remained gentle. She found his caress…pleasant, but he engendered no urgent need within her to draw him closer or to open her mouth to his probing.
Unlike Adam. In a rush of sensation, she remembered how he had sparked her to flame with the merest brush of his lips. Made her chest ache with wanting to be encircled in his arms and never let go.
She eased away from Mr. Dixon. Before she could apologize for using him so shamelessly, he dropped down to one knee.
“Marry me, Helena! No man could admire more than I your unconventional, questing mind, your strength, your uninhibited passion. You may ride whatever horse you choose, drive as fast a phaeton as you desire. We can even explore the streets of the city in disguise together! Let Society gossip as it pleases. I shall never forsake you!”
“Please, Mr. Dixon, get up!” she said, dismayed by the direction her inquiry had gone. “You mistake me entirely! I should not have gone out in disguise if I could have explored as I wanted. Nor did I choose a spirited horse just to set Society on its ear. I have never tried to incite gossip, but only to live according to my lights.”
“Then let me live with you, protect you, love you.”
Not sure whether it was love, loyalty or a secret desire to tweak Society that had promoted his unexpected declaration, she said, “Mere words cannot express how honored I am. But I cannot accept your offer. I fear, by kissing you, I have already imposed grievously upon your friendship. I never wish to marry.”
“Perhaps you need the right gentleman to persuade you.”
“I cannot be persuaded—and I have made you uncomfortable in the bargain. Forgive me.”
He rose and took an agitated turn about the room. “It’s Darnell, isn’t it?” he asked, gazing back at her. “He will never break his word to Miss Standish, you know.”
A bit alarmed that he had guessed her secret, Helena avoided a direct answer. “I would not have him break it.”
“Then why not consider my suit?”
“I am leaving London soon. May we not part as friends?”
“You are resolved upon this?”
“I’ve long wished to travel.” She gave him a deprecating smile. “I believe I’ve just been given the perfect opportunity to do so. As it happens, Lady Seagrave is about to set out for the Caribbean, and I have agreed accompany her.”
“You cannot be dissuaded? I should always be proud to stand by you and support you, even as just a friend.”
“And I am honored by your friendship. But I must go.”
He studied her for a long moment, then sighed. “I suppose there is nothing left for me to do but to once again express my deepest admiration and devotion. I wish you well on your journey! Remember, if you ever change your mind, England and I would rejoice to welcome you home.”
Bowing low, he kissed her hand and walked out. Thoughtfully, Helena watched him go. Her guilt at refusing him was lessened by noting that he did not appear to be a man whose fondest hopes had been crushed. She suspected that, had she been unwise enough to accept his offer, the admiration he felt for her “unconventional” spirit would have swiftly dwindled once he discovered his scandalous bride caused him not just to be barred from the balls and dinners he deemed “dull,” but also to be denied admission to his clubs and cut by many of his peers.
As for her plans for Adam, though Mr. Dixon’s kiss had been mildly titillating, it had not come close to igniting within her the intensity of desire, the tenderness or the sense of completeness Adam’s had.
A shiver of excitement swirled in her belly. Since it appeared only Adam could create the magic she’d felt in his arms, she was more anxious than ever to recreate that experience and allow all those feelings full play.
Grateful as she was to Mr. Dixon for showing her how to begin, she still wanted a bit more instruction in the art of seduction. If she hurried, she should catch the Divine Alice before she left for her rendezvous.
SOME TIME LATER, LADY SEAGRAVE’S carriage deposited her at Darnell House. Helena entered to find Harrison himself stationed by the door.
“Miss Lambarth, welcome back!” he cried. “Lady Darnell wished me to inform you that she and Miss Charis would like to see you at your earliest convenience.”
Surprised and warmed by the concern evident in Harrison’s normally impassive face, Helena handed him her cloak. Though she’d suspected her aunt would not allow her to slip away without a struggle, her chest tightened at her new family’s demonstration of support even as she dreaded what would no doubt be a heart-wrenching meeting.
All the more reason to get it over with quickly, she told herself. “Then I shall go immediately,” she replied. Squaring her shoulders, she followed him up the stairs.
As soon as Harrison admitted her, both Lady Darnell and Charis rushed over to embrace her. “That hateful girl!” Aunt Lillian said through a haze of tears. “I shall leave this house the minute Adam brings her here as his bride. But you mustn’t despair, my dear. I am still Somebody. If we retire to the country until the next scandal captures the attention of the ton, we can still—”
“Dearest Aunt Lillian!” Helena interrupted her, feeling guiltier than ever that instead of the reproaches she deserved for bringing scandal down upon them, her aunt was thinking only of redeeming Helena’s position. “I cannot tell you how grateful I am, but I refuse to allow you to put yourself out any further on my behalf.”
“You cannot think us so poor-spirited as to desert you!” Charis said. “I should not have consented to leave you last night, had Adam and Nathan not both said ’twould be better to let you go with Lady Seagrave and end the incident quickly rather than prolong it by arguing.”
“Indeed, we shall all stand by you,” Lady Darnell affirmed. “As soon as Charis is wed, let us go to Claygate. By the Little Season, much of the talk will have died down. I doubt the highest sticklers will ever be induced to receive you, and naturally Almack’s is out of the question, but my friends, who value you for yourself, will send enough invitations to keep us tolerably amused.”
“My dear Aunt Lillian, retire to Claygate if you wish, but I cannot accompany you. Perhaps later, when all has passed into memory, I may visit you—or Charis, at whatever embassy she is gracing as hostess. If you still want to acknowledge me then. For you see, there is more to the scandal even than what Lady Cordelia revealed last night. Something quite shocking, of which I have only just learned myself. Will you not sit while I explain?”
Briefly, Helena detailed what Lady Seagrave had told her, finishing by informing them she meant to journey with her grandmother to meet Gavin. Though at first, Aunt Lillian gasped and nearly swooned, after reviving she declared that even if Helena meant to acknowledge Seagrave as her father, the Darnell family would support her.
“Then you are far too good! Not that I mean to post a notice in the Times, but as I plan to spend time with Lady Seagrave, sooner or later, the secret will be out. I’m not sure which would be worse for you—to be connected to a hoyden who sneaks about the city in masculine dress, or to have housed the illegitimate daughter of a privateer.”
“To us, you are just ‘our Helena’ and we love you,” Charis said fiercely. “Can we not persuade you to stay?”
Were it for their love only, she might be swayed. But she knew she could not remain and conceal for long the strength of her feelings for Adam—and she had already exposed them to scandal enough.
Feeling the burn of tears again, she shook her head. “I’m sorry. I love you both dearly, and I shall be very sorry to miss your wedding, Charis, but I must go.”
While Lady Darnell reached for her handkerchief, Charis gave her a long, searching look. “I understand,” she said, giving Helena a hug. “Damn Priscilla! Do what you must, my dearest Helena. Remember that wherever you travel, you will always find a welcome with Nathan and I.”
After more hugs all around, Helena insisted they not cancel their plans to attend the ball to which Lord Blanchard was to escort them later in the evening. Leaving them to complete their preparations, she returned to her room to set Nell packing. Then, after the ladies departed, she went to the library to wait for Adam.