This day has gone to shit and it’s barely even started.
The battery on the truck is flat because Juda left the light on inside the cab last night. Dipshit. After jump-starting it, I wipe my hands on my jeans and put the cables back in the toolbox on the side of the truck. Just fucking great. Now I’m running thirty minutes late for this morning’s egg deliveries.
Pulling up by the back entrance to Buck’s Big Burgers, I round the tray and grab Buck’s daily order. I grit my teeth when I notice him stomping his fat arse up to the truck. I hated this guy in high school, and I still do, but I try everything I can to keep things between us professional. While he does everything he can to be a dick.
“Mornin’, Buck,” I say politely.
He curls his hands around his wide hips. “So nice of you to show up. I’m running a business here.”
I tune him out as he continues to berate me for the next three minutes straight.
Maybe it’s because Juda is right and I am severely sexually frustrated, or maybe I’m done with Buck’s superiority complex, but when he mentions how unprofessional this is for the fifth time, I lose my shit. “For fuck’s sake, Buck, I’ve got other stops to make. As you’ve pointed out, I’m already behind schedule, so would you just take your fucking eggs and let me get on with it?”
His upper lip curls in an ugly sneer. “How dare you talk to me like that? I’m a paying customer. Don’t you know anything about customer service, you moron? The customer is always right! And you’re fucking late. So what are you going to do to make it up to me?”
Over his shit, I pick up his crate of eggs and drop them at his feet. “I’m going to let you find a new supplier. That’s what I’m going to do, Buck.”
I can see his blood boiling in his veins. His face reddens so much I’m sure he’s on the verge of busting a vessel. Before he can get another word out, I stroll back around the truck, hoist myself into the cab, then send him a one-fingered salute out the window as I pull away.
That felt fucking amazing. I grin to myself as I make my way to my next stop.
* * *
Delilah trundles along at my side as I head out to the birthing paddocks to check on a couple of llamas that should be dropping a bundle any day now. She likes doing the rounds with me, and it’s good for her to get out and about with her own kind.
Some days, I’m sure she thinks she’s a human. That girl is going to get a rude awakening when she’s strong enough to be out in the paddocks full-time. I ruffle her soft coat as she trots along at my side.
“Yo, I’m goin’ into town. You need anything?” Juda calls out to me, leaning on the timber railings around the paddock.
I shake my head. “Nah, I’m good. What are you going in for?”
His mouth kicks up in a smirk. “To let off a little steam.” He winks. “Then I’ll drop ’round to Aunty K’s and pick up this week’s treats.”
Nodding, I shift my attention back to the llama I currently have my entire arm inserted in.
Juda calls out again. “I was serious this morning. You spend too much time with animals and not enough with females of the human variety. Mona has a sister.”
“Fuck off,” I grumble. I hear his laughter as he makes his way to his car. Then he tears down the dirt drive, flicking rocks and dust all over the side of the damn house and pissing me the hell off.
Genie must sense the tension in my body and stiffens up. I stroke her back with my free hand. “It’s okay, honey, shhh.” I soothe her as best I can. It can’t be comfortable having someone’s arm up your arse end, but it had to be done. She had issues with her last cria, so I’m keeping an extra close eye on her this time around. “Baby’s doing fine, girl. I think you’ll be able to meet her tomorrow,” I say as my arm slides out of her.
After removing the lubed-up shoulder-length glove, I throw it in the bin on my way out of the barn. Juda’s taunts roll around inside my head as I stomp up to the house. I run a hand through my hair, and I let the back door slam shut behind me.
Asher arches a brow. “Juda?”
“Is it ever anything else?”
Asher shrugs and goes back to whatever he’s doing on his laptop.
For the most part, we all get along pretty well. But recently, Juda has really been pushing the whole “you need a woman” bullshit. He doesn’t understand that being in a relationship takes time and effort, and I don’t have the energy required for that. I’m not like him; I can’t do one-night stands. It was never my thing, not even when I was younger. I mean, yeah, I’ve resorted to it over the years, but it never felt right.
Pouring myself a scotch, I knock it down in one hit, drawing Asher’s eyes to me yet again. He closes his laptop, places it on the coffee table in front of him, and turns his torso towards me.
“What?” I snap. Asher has always been the quiet, contemplative one of us. And it’s clear he has something to say now.
He throws an arm over the back of the couch and tilts his head to the side. “Maybe Juda has a point. You spend all your time here. You don’t go out. You don’t socialise. You’re just going through the motions every single day.”
“And your point is?”
“There should be more to life.” He says this like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
I shake my head. “Life isn’t a party. It’s hard work and sacrifice.”
“That’s where you’re wrong, brother. Yeah, some of it is about working your arse off and sacrificing things occasionally, but that’s not all it’s about. If you have no joy in your life, what’s the point of living it?”
A lump forms in my throat, and I look away from him, unable to maintain eye contact. I gave up my own dreams and aspirations to take over the farm after Mum and Dad died. It was so long ago I don’t even remember what I wanted to do with my life back then. Raising Juda and making sure the farm brought in enough money to pay for Asher to go to college was all that mattered.
Keeping my gaze fixed on the empty scotch glass in my hand, I mutter, “I’m going for a shower.”
Asher speaks to my retreating form. “You should be a little selfish for the first time in your life and pass some of your workload on to me and Juda for a while. We can handle it, you know. Just think about it, Eli.”
Could they handle it? Probably. Would it really be that simple?
Once under the hot spray, I allow myself to imagine what it would be like to come in from working in the yards to a beautiful woman waiting for me. My chest constricts with longing. I want it so much.
When I get out of the shower, I need to go for a drive. I don’t know where I’m going, but between Juda and Asher’s words, I have a lot of thinking to do.
Day seven of battling the red river, and I’m craving sweets big time. And not just any old sweets—I need McKenna’s Heavenly Treats. It’s just over an hour’s drive away but so worth the trip.
I pop a couple of my lower-grade painkillers since today is only a level six on the pain scale, then throw my heat packs in to warm. The second the microwave dings, I pull them out, drop them straight into my oversized handbag, and make my way to my car. Once inside, I secure the heat packs in place, hook up my Bluetooth to play Krista and Becca Ritchie’s latest book, Tangled Like Us, then reverse out of my drive.
In preparation for eating all the things, I’m wearing my favourite stretchy black leggings, a chunky black cable-knit sweater dress that stops just above my knees, and a pair of brown suede booties. It’s understated yet stylish, and most importantly, baggy, thus somewhat hiding my bloated endo belly that I plan on extending with all the bingeing I’m about to do.
I swoon along to the story as I drive. These girls can write some seriously amazing stuff. Part of the reason I haven’t bothered finding a bakery with gluten-free awesomeness closer to home is because the drive gives me an opportunity to get my audio romance fix.
Pulling into a parking spot three stores up from McKenna’s Heavenly Treats, I just about squeal in excitement. This is what life without sex has come to: excessively over-the-top levels of enthusiasm for baked goods.
After throwing my heat packs into the back, I snatch my bag from the passenger seat, swing my door open, and step out of my car. I gasp in terror. Air pushes into my body. A vehicle careens past me. I plaster myself to the side of my car. My heart thunders in my ears. Christ. In my eagerness to get my sugar fix, I didn’t even look.
I press my shaking palm to my torso, swallow hard, and count back from ten under my breath to calm myself. That was too close. I didn’t even have time to see who or what almost hit me. Smoothing a hand down my ponytail, I swing my head from side to side, checking the traffic this time before rounding the hood of my car and stepping up onto the footpath.
“Hey, you!” A pair of seriously pissed off, blazing blue eyes scan over my body, causing my throat to constrict as a man storms towards me.
“Umm, yes?” I squeak.
His eyes narrow to slits. “You just stepped out in front of me. I could have killed you! What were you thinking?” He comes to a halt a mere foot from me.
He thinks I did that on purpose? Straightening my spine, I glare up at him. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Next time you get out of your car, maybe check for traffic first.” His eyes sear through me.
My top lip lifts in a snarl. “You’re the one driving like a lunatic down a busy street—filled with people, I might add. Maybe you should drive a little slower and be aware of your surroundings.”
Lifting a large hand, he scrubs it through his dishevelled sandy brown hair and shakes his head at me. “You’re saying that was my fault? Lady, you’re insane.”
Strangely enough, this is not the first time the opposite sex has questioned my sanity. Sliding my tongue across my top lip, I brace myself for battle. If this guy thinks he can call me insane before he even knows me, he’s deluded. I’m about to let fly with a litany of insults, when I realise the annoyance that filled his blue eyes moments ago has been replaced by heat.
I swallow, my anger faltering. “Uh,” I mumble. Shit, get it together, Charlotte! He’s a redneck country bumkin, and he just called you insane. In an attempt to get my head right, I take a deep breath, but it backfires. He’s so close I’m overwhelmed by his intoxicating scent: a mixture of soap, earth, and leather.
Leather? Where the hell did that come from? Does he work with leather? My head spins a little at the possibilities as my eyes leave his to travel over his muscle-clad body. Firm biceps strain the fabric of his red chequered button-down, followed by defined tan forearms protruding from his rolled-up sleeves. I just about swallow my tongue. I love arms.
Continuing my perusal, I’m met with thick denim-encased thighs. I follow them down to the cowboy boots they’re tucked into and sigh. He’s so fine. If I hadn’t recently taken a vow of celibacy, and there wasn’t a murder-scene-type situation in my pants, I’d be climbing him like a tree already.
When my eyes finally return to his, I’m in more of a make-love-not-war kind of mood. And he’s looking at me like I’m his next meal. The longer we stare at each other, the thicker the air around us becomes. Need pulses through me as he slowly lifts his hand towards my cheek.
His warm palm cups my jaw, his thumb tugging my bottom lip free from between my teeth. My tongue snakes out to wet my lips and grazes over the tip of his thumb, still pressed against my flesh. A deep but quiet groan escapes him, traveling right through me to my very core.
But while it served to turn me on even further, it seems to have pulled him back to reality. He drops his hand as though he was just touching a leper and takes a step away from me. Confusion at this whole encounter fills me, and I rub at my forehead, trying to remember how I came to be standing here with this delicious stranger.
What the ever-loving fuck?
I got out of my truck, intent on ripping this broad a new one. How did I end up touching her and imagining those full red lips wrapped around my dick?
Swallowing hard, I force my incredibly inappropriate thoughts down, then grip the back of my neck and rack my brain for something to say.
Nothing comes to mind. Great. Just fucking brilliant.
Her lips purse, and her hazel eyes stare straight through me, shining with lust just as powerful as my own.
“Fuck,” I growl. An image of shoving her up against the red brick wall just three feet from us and filling her mouth with my tongue swirls behind my tightly closed eyes. I clamp my jaw shut, grinding my teeth together.
I’m jolted from the fantasy by cool fingers sliding over my exposed forearm. My eyes pop open. She’s stepped closer and is looking up into my eyes with confusion. I take another step away from her, breaking our contact. It’s hard enough to think without her touching me.
“Look,” I say. “Just be more careful in future.” Then I turn around and stalk back to my truck parked haphazardly a few spaces up.
“Seriously? That’s it? You eye-fuck the shit out of me then just walk away?” she demands, storming after me.
I turn, looking at her over my shoulder as she follows my retreat. She’s not going to let it go, so I pause at my truck—hand on the handle, ready for a quick escape. Clearing my throat, I gear up to apologise for my behaviour, but she cuts me off.
“Don’t you dare say the word sorry right now.”
Raising a brow, I’m stumped. What does she want then? “Uh, what would you like me to say?”
She tilts her head, her bright-red ponytail swishing over her shoulder as she places a hand on her hip. “How about introducing yourself, then buying me a coffee?”
Clearly, I heard her wrong. Furrowing my brows, I lean towards her slightly. “I’m sorry, what?”
Her eyes flash with annoyance. “So that’s how it’s going to be. You’re going to bitch out and leave me hanging. What a gentleman.” She shakes her head, then turns on her heeled boots and walks back towards McKenna’s Heavenly Treats.