Epilogue

Without doubt my entire life was overshadowed by my childhood and the tormenting acts of violence and hate I had to witness. Although I was a child and got the impression that what was happening around me and to me was normal, to be surrounded by barbed wire and watch towers, men pointing guns at you all the time, to live with constant fear, cruelty, beatings, screaming, shooting, endless mental and physical torture and death, and to be called a non-person during your formative years, leaves a scar. And throughout my life I have been aware of that scar, sometimes minimally, sometimes powerfully.

People ask me if I blame my father for the suffering we had to endure. He could have put aside his beliefs in right and wrong, and become a hero of fascism, been part of the killing machine. I’m proud of him for not taking the easy way out, for understanding the consequences of his actions, for not becoming part of the national hate, a quiescent part of the assassination machine. His courage was limitless. If it had killed us all, he still could not have chosen any other way. For my father there was never a possibility of compromise. And he willingly paid the price for his convictions.

My mother’s obsession with saving my life at any cost gave her a superhuman strength, which I have tried to live up to all my life. Eventually I did not believe any longer that I was part of the Untermenschen, the non-persons, who don’t deserve to live. I survived the hell, but hardly anyone else did: ninety-eight per cent of all deportees died. Surviving doesn’t make one special – but it does make one extraordinarily lucky.

Although I have appeared on the stage, on television and in films, and have had several books published, I believe that my most important achievement was to bring into this world an extraordinary human being who will carry on what my mother taught us about love and inner strength – about the destruction hate breeds; about happiness; contentment and not blaming others when things don’t work out. She taught us not to lead a useless life, to strive to become a better person, to live with love in one’s heart . . . to be happy.