Taichi
December 20, 1942
When I awake, we’re still on the bus. Kansas still stretches on, flat and snow-covered with a pearl gray sky for as far as I can see.
“Oh, good,” Aiko says. “You’re awake. We’re supposed to arrive in a few minutes.”
I rub at my bleary eyes. “Okay,” I say through a yawn, and then I let my head rest against the cold, hard window.
Once again, I’ve been loaded on a bus and told where I’m going. Stafford, Kansas, with several other Japanese American families. Once more, I had to pack all my belongings into bags that are no more than I can carry, though I never really unpacked them at Death Valley, so at least it was easier this time.
And at least at Death Valley, everyone was saying goodbye. Aunt Chiyu and Uncle Fuji had been too nervous to come with us and live in predominately Caucasian communities, so they had chosen to be sent to one of the other camps in Wyoming. Lillian, her newborn son, and Ted’s parents were going there as well. Mrs. Yoneda and Tommy were being permitted to move back to her parents’ house in Los Angeles, so long as she promised to check in with the WRA about Tommy once a month.
A few other families had chosen to go to Wyoming as well, but most of us were being sent to various farms in the Midwest. Or for a lucky few who were the right age and could afford it, to a university.
I’ve desired a life outside the fence since April, but now that I have it, I find that I understand my aunt and uncle’s fears. In Colorado Springs, our bus had stopped so we could get some food, only the restaurant refused to serve us. We were only able to eat because a Caucasian man saw and went in to place an order for us. I had never felt so ashamed while eating a hamburger. There had been another incident in Garden City when I tried to buy a piece of fruit at a filling station.
I’m jolted out of my thoughts by the bus stopping, and then turning off.
We’re here.
Aiko stands, and an envelope flutters out of her pocket and onto my lap. She snatches it up before I have a chance to react.
I stand too, relishing how it feels to stretch my legs. “What was that?”
“Nothing.” Aiko’s smile is bashful. “Just a letter I received from Ichiro before we left Death Valley.”
On a better day I would’ve smiled and teased my sister. Instead I say, “Anything interesting?”
“Mostly news about people we both know at the hospital. Not much that would be of interest to you. Though he did say that James Kanito had a very well-attended service. Even a lot of the administration came.”
I snort as we start moving down the aisle. “I’m sure the Kanito family really appreciated their presence.”
“Obviously it doesn’t make up for what happened.” Aiko’s voice and expression are both tender. “But isn’t it better that they came? Don’t you think it hopefully shows that they won’t just ignore complaints anymore?”
Since we’re stepping off the bus, I don’t feel like I have to answer her. Of course I’m glad James’s service was well-attended, but I’m also not so naïve anymore to actually think—
Evalina.
I can’t seem to move. It’s really her. She’s really standing at a bus station in Stafford, Kansas, shivering in the cold, and watching me with delight on her face.
When she opens her mouth to call to me, her jaw trembles. “I promised that when you got off the bus, I would be here.”
I drop my bag and run to her.
Evalina
December 25, 1942
As soon as breakfast is over, I pull on boots to guard my feet from the snow and tie on my coat that’s always been sufficient in California, but that the Kansas wind seems to laugh at as it blows right through.
I march down the road with exaggerated steps to warm myself until I arrive at the flaking, white house. Before I can knock, Taichi whips open the door—his handsome face still catching me off guard after being without it for so long—and pulls me inside. The wood-burning stove has their humble workers’ house so warm, I don’t hesitate when Taichi takes my coat off my shoulders.
“Thank you,” I murmur. “Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas, Evalina.”
Even after five days, I still feel a strange shyness in our first few minutes together. Both his parents and Aiko are always here, and they’re always very friendly, but the newness still leaves me feeling awkward. If my mother were here, she would warn me that I’m being a pest, coming over here every day. Taichi assures me I’m not.
“Where are your gloves?” Taichi presses my hands between the two of his, which makes my heart feel as though it just burst into flames.
“I couldn’t find them.”
“You should have waited to come over until you found them. I like all of your fingers. I would rather you not lose any.”
I laugh, and some of the embarrassment slips away. “Merry Christmas, Mr. and Mrs. Hamasaki.”
They look up from their morning tea. “Merry Christmas, Evalina.”
The house is so small, there isn’t really anywhere we can go and have privacy. With the snow, we can’t even go outside. But the Hamasakis are used to close quarters, and his family is respectful about letting Taichi and me talk as if they are not present.
We settle on the couch by the stove. Taichi’s fingers clasp mine.
“How was Christmas morning at the Bishops?”
“Fine. They’re a nice family.”
“They seem like it. They’ve done a lot for us.” Taichi smiles, but it’s strained. Being sent somewhere else that he didn’t get to choose has cost him in pride. I hadn’t thought about that, but I could see it soon after arriving. He didn’t just want out of Manzanar, he wanted to be free on his own terms.
“What will your parents be doing this morning?” Taichi asks.
“I don’t know, really.” My stomach squirms with guilt, even though Mama and Daddy had blessed the trip. “It’ll be a quiet Christmas for them.”
He squeezes my hand, perhaps seeing my sadness. “Maybe the three of you can celebrate next week.”
I try not to, seeing as his parents are about ten feet away at the kitchen table, but my tears well and fall before I can do a thing to stop them. In five days, I will say goodbye to Taichi yet again, get on a train with the Bishops, and go back to San Francisco.
“I just wish you could come with me,” I whisper.
I cover my face, feeling sharp humiliation. On the very first day, after Taichi got over the shock of me being there to pick him up from the bus station, we had vowed that we wouldn’t waste our time whining about how little time we had.
“I’m sorry.” I wipe at my tears with the sleeve of my sweater. “I know we said we wouldn’t do this.”
“I wish I could go with you too. Or that you could stay here.”
“Maybe I could.” My heart inflates at the thought. “They have universities here just like they do in California. What does it matter if I go to school here or there?”
“No, Evalina.” Taichi’s tone is gentle, but the words sting all the same. “That’s foolish when we don’t know that . . .” He swallows.
“You don’t know that what?”
Taichi looks at me and takes a deep breath. “We’ve heard talk that enlistment might soon be open for the Nisei.”
My response falls out involuntarily, no more than a whisper, “No.”
Taichi is quiet for a moment. “How can I not, Evalina? If I want places like Manzanar to become just a bad memory, or Diego to be released if he really is in a POW camp, how can I not do my part?”
Given everything that’s happened to him in this last year, how can he be willing to fight for America?
Taichi leans forward until his forehead is matched with mine. “I don’t like it any more than you do, but you need to go back home. You need to study hard and get your law degree. And then someday we’ll be battling together. Side by side.”
“You can’t guarantee that.”
“No,” he says quietly. “But I think the chance of it happening is worth fighting for.”
I swallow. “Me too.”
“But not now.” He leans back. “Right now, we get to rest and enjoy being together. And you get to open your Christmas present. Don’t look at me like that. It’s not much.”
“Still. I didn’t expect anything at all.”
“That’s why it was so fun.” Taichi grins and hands me a box. “Merry Christmas, Evalina.”
I slide the top off the box and burst out laughing. “It’s an orange.” I pull it from the box and hold it out to him. “You gave me an orange.”
“They had them at a gas station we stopped at on our way. I tried to buy it because it made me think of you, but they wouldn’t let me.” Taichi’s face flickers again, showing his bruised pride. “Not until the guard said that we were on our way to help with cattle for the war effort. Then they seemed okay with it.”
My blood pressure rises. “You should’ve bought it and thrown it at them.”
Taichi laughs. “I thought about it, because I assumed that’s what you would tell me to do. But then I decided that I would much rather eat it and think about you.”
“So, why didn’t you?”
“Because I slept instead, and when I woke up again, we were practically here. Now I get to enjoy it with you.”
I pierce the peel with my thumb. “Mrs. Ling thinks oranges are lucky for that reason. That they’re shareable.”
I hand half to Taichi, and his fingertips brush mine.
He smiles. “This is the luckiest orange I’ve ever eaten, then.”
In a few days, this will all just be a memory. And if Taichi really does enlist, who knows how long it will be before we see each other again.
But there will be plenty of days ahead for sadness and fighting. Today, I will instead choose to be brave by feeling the joy offered to me in this moment.