CHAPTER
10
Never Being Satisfied
With the publication of the article in the Harvard Business Review, the fledgling company took off. With their first employee coordinating the office, Herb and David were no longer just chasing after the next opportunity, while trying to come through for their current clients and, occasionally, catching their breath. They now had time to concentrate on innovative ways to improve their premiere service, anticipate the needs of their clients, and consider how their company might evolve.
At this point, by helping to solve a perennial problem that had plagued companies since commerce first began, they had found a niche in the marketplace for which they were becoming known.
While it was still far from perfect, they had discovered a way to help companies identify people who were cut out to truly connect with and persuade others—and avoid hiring people who did not possess these qualities needed to succeed in sales.
“At the time,” Herb says, “with President Kennedy’s announcement that we would land an American on the moon before the end of the decade, it created a world of possibilities. All of a sudden, everyone was asking, ‘If we can put a man on the moon, why can’t we do this, that, or the other thing?’ That spirit of ‘Why can’t we do this? What is to stop us?’ filled the air. It was a very exciting time in which everything seemed possible.”
Herb pauses, then adds, “Take that backdrop, and couple it with the notion that, for better or worse, I have never been completely satisfied—at least, not for too long. I guess that created a dynamic where I was always trying to be ‘just a little better.’ So, as we were advising companies on who they should hire for their sales positions, I realized that, while we were helping companies increase their batting average significantly, there were some cases in which we were missing the mark. And, that’s what I wanted to dive into.” He adds, with an intensity that still prevails, “Why were some people with empathy and persuasive skills not making it in sales? There had to be another ingredient. What were we missing?”
As Herb interviewed some of the sales leaders he was working with, and reviewed some of the psychological assessments of people they had recommended who did not quite make it in sales, he had countless conversations with his business partner David. “We were missing something,” Herb says. “But I wasn’t sure what. I just couldn’t figure it out.” Then he started looking within himself, exploring his own thoughts and feelings about sales. That is when he came to a realization. “I was focusing on how people who had a desire to persuade others needed to have a positive sense of themselves. And that is definitely needed,” he says.
“But sales, like sports, is also a game of rejection,” he adds. “In baseball, a batter who gets a hit one out of every three times at bat could end up in the Hall of Fame. So, what is as important as the hit is what happens to that batter on those two-out-of-three times when he strikes out. Does he take it on the chin? Does it get him so far down that he sinks into a slump? Or does he view it as just part of the game? Can he just shrug it off and get himself mentally prepared for his next time at bat? He can’t take it personally,” Herb says. “That will send him into a tailspin. It’s the same thing in sales. Except there the odds are even more against you. In most sales situations, it is far fewer than one out of every three opportunities that you close a sale. So how does a salesperson handle that rejection? That was my ‘aha’ moment. Could we discover a way to measure how someone would handle rejection? That’s where we needed to go.”
There was one sales applicant in particular who still sticks out in Herb’s mind. He had recommended this applicant to a client because he had outstanding empathy and was driven to persuade. “Sure enough,” Herb says, “he started out like a whirlwind. Shortly after the training period, it looked like he was going to become one of their star performers. Three months later, however, all of his progress came to a grinding halt.” As it turned out, this individual had a strong enough need to persuade, so he closed some early sales. But when the rejections started to kick in, he was not able to look at the situation and realize that it was just the statistics finally catching up with him. “Instead,” Herb explains, “he saw the rejections as the truth finally being told. He saw the early success as simply a fluke, and the failures as a true representation of himself. Then, as he desperately tried to turn his situation around, he pressed too hard and drove away prospects that he would have sold earlier. The more he pressed, the more he failed, and the more he failed, the more he came down on himself, spiraling, unfortunately, to his own undoing.”
In order to succeed in sales, Herb saw, you had to view rejection differently from the majority of people on this planet. Most people, when they are rejected, say to themselves, “Well, that wasn’t a whole lot of fun. I don’t think I’m going to try that again.”
But successful salespeople, Herb found, view rejection as a learning experience. It is not to be taken personally. Rather, when they are turned down or lose a sale, they are walking away saying something to themselves along the lines of, “I understand what just happened. I didn’t know enough about my prospect, or my competition, or the marketplace.” And if they could, they would go through a revolving door and replay the situation all over again—with a different ending this time.
“Resilience, quite simply, is an individual’s ability to feel good enough about him- or herself, so they can accept rejection not as a personal affront but as part of life,” Herb says. “Someone with resilience has the ability to leave the rejection behind and go on from there. Those who accept themselves, who have a strong enough sense of resilience, operate freely and fully, allowing themselves to function at or near the top of their capacity.”
As Herb discovered a way to measure resilience with the same accuracy and depth that he knew how to measure empathy and persuasiveness, he dramatically improved his firm’s ability to predict whether someone could succeed in sales.
From there, as their work expanded beyond the automotive, insurance, and mutual funds industries, Herb says, “We soon learned that being able to sell was just one piece of the puzzle. Although all sales jobs involve, at their core, the ability to persuade, the breadth of these jobs is virtually limitless.”
Sales jobs range from quick-closing, hard-selling, short-term, commission-only positions to the opposite extreme, where the persuasive element is much more subtle and takes place only a few times a year at the end of a long process. Similarly, many sales positions require little technical background, while others require the salesperson to be a technical expert in a particular product or service. Some sales jobs presume that the individual customer will buy once and likely never again, while in most other sales situations, a one-time-only buyer would be disastrous.
“As we got deeper into the sales process, and closer with our clients,” Herb says, “we understood that we needed to ask a lot more questions in order to understand the requirements of the specific sales role, and, therefore, the personality attributes required for an individual to fill that role successfully.” He adds, “This is when we coined the phrase ‘job matching,’ which, essentially, was a shorthand way of connecting the actual requirements of the job with the personality qualities needed to succeed in that position.”
They were adding science to a hiring process that prior to that had gone on nothing more than first impressions and gut reactions.
“Even today,” Herb says, “when we ask a manager what the three most important responsibilities are for someone reporting to him or her, then we ask the person reporting the same question, we rarely get the same three answers from both the manager and the person reporting to that manager. Then, on those rare occasions when we do get the same three responses from the manager and the person reporting to him or her, it is extremely seldom that we get them in the same order of importance.”
That is amazing when you stop to think about it.
How in the world could managers hire for a position, let alone manage expectations, if there was not clarity and consistency on the three major responsibilities for that position?
The implications were far-reaching—for Caliper, as well as for the clients with whom they were working.
Herb’s company was quickly moving beyond where they started.
As he began to broaden and deepen the personality assessment, he realized that identifying two of the qualities that were required to succeed in sales was just the start.
Herb was now asking fundamental questions that got at the heart of what drove people in all walks of life. By assessing and understanding the motivations of people in the workplace, he was gleaning a clear understanding of the requirements of not just sales, but also customer service, technical, management, and leadership positions. He and David were moving beyond sales and becoming poised to help companies improve their ability to hire and develop top performers in every position, and at every level. They were gaining key insights into why some companies succeed and others flounder.
By identifying best practices, they were starting to evolve from being a company that assessed potential to one that could advise clients on all of their human resources needs—from hiring and developing top talent to team building to succession planning to leadership development.
Lessons for First-Time Managers
Interestingly, as Herb and David hired their first employee, they both became managers for the first time as well. They found that supervising someone else is a new responsibility and provides more than a few new and interesting challenges.
Before Herb and David were both leaders and top performers in their organization—everything started and stopped with them. But now things were going to be different.
They needed to learn the fine art of managing.
While there are many books, articles, and seminars on what makes an effective manager, studies show that most people in management positions have little or no management experience or training before taking on their current role. In addition, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, more than half of workers who move up to supervisory, managerial, or executive positions came from other roles inside the same firm.
At the end of the day, a company’s productivity and ability to retain top performers depends largely upon the skills of its managers. But first-time managers often have misperceptions about what it means—and what it takes—to be a successful manager. There is a huge change in both mindset and behaviors when moving from doing work oneself to achieving results through the work of others.
“The most common mistakes of new managers tend to fall into two categories,” Herb says. “They are either too tough or not tough enough. It is a very difficult balancing act.”
Managers who are “too tough” in their approach to supervising others rely on their authority to get things done, Herb explains. “They might say, ‘I’m simply going to tell people what to do, and if they just do it the way I’ve always done it, they’re going to be fine.’ But it rarely works that way.”
On the other hand, managers who are “not tough enough” may feel uncomfortable with their new authority. They may be managing people who were formerly their peers and still want to be friends like they were before. But, when someone moves from peer to manager, the rules change. “They are now in a position where they have to hold not just themselves accountable, but others as well. And, sometimes they either don’t know how to do that or don’t want to,” Herb says.
“Among the most important lessons for a new manager is realizing that people don’t want to be told what to do and how to do it—they want to know ‘why.’ The people in your organization want to know they are part of something that is meaningful. Let them know how their assignment or project fits into the company’s larger goals and overall objectives,” he adds.
What are the personality attributes needed to succeed as a manager?
“You need to be bright enough to be able to think on your feet,” Herb says. “You also need to be assertive enough to be able to push an agenda forward. Of course, you need to be persuasive, so you can bring others around and create consensus. In addition, you need to be resilient enough to rebound from difficult situations that might arise. You also need to be self-motivated, as well as have what we call external structure, or the ability to organize thoughts, work, and people. And last, but not least, you need to have a high sense of urgency, or a need to get things done—now, rather than later.”
How are those personality attributes translated into behaviors?
“What you see in effective managers,” Herb says, “are individuals who know how to establish goals, priorities, and expectations for their team. They know how to persuasively sell ideas while gaining support and buy-in from others. They recognize problems, issues, and opportunities. They are also willing to make tough decisions, and know how to leverage resources effectively.”
What are some other pieces of advice that can help people to become successful managers?
“First and foremost,” Herb says, “when someone takes on a management role, it is often in addition to his or her day-to-day responsibilities. So it can be overwhelming. It is important to discuss with your manager what is expected of you in this new role so that you can work toward achieving realistic goals.
“It is also important to know that you have much to learn and be open to learning from your team,” he adds.
“Communication is also vitally important. In the beginning, don’t be afraid of overcommunicating. It is better to state what you think is obvious than to find out later that your team did not understand your expectations. Also, listen. Invite and welcome questions and insights from others. Make sure they know that you are there to listen to their concerns and ideas, as well as to help provide solutions.
“And give praise often,” Herb says. “No one will ever complain that you said ‘thank you’ too often. Provide feedback that is real, honest, and positive. Praise individuals formally as well as part of what you do every day.”
Another cardinal rule is to address concerns immediately. “Whether behavior or performance related,” Herb says, “it is important to address concerns before they become a bigger problem and affect the team and its productivity. Address these concerns one-on-one, in a way that is honest, straightforward, and highlights a place for improvement.”
Along these lines, you also need to recognize that you are now there to be a coach. Your professional growth as a manager starts or stops with how well you can allow, encourage, and help develop someone else’s growth. Become the mentor you always wanted to have. Establish trust, and others will seek out your advice.
One of the most difficult challenges for new managers is learning how to manage conflict within their team. “Conflict is not bad,” Herb says, “it is necessary to drive ideas and creativity. Team members should absolutely feel comfortable stating their opposing viewpoints. But it is also important to realize that some members of your team, including yourself perhaps, may have a low tolerance for conflict. So they will avoid it, which can shut down ideas and negatively affect your team’s dynamics. In many ways, conflict can have a Goldilocks effect. How much is too much? How much is too little? What is vitally important is to understand the nature of the conflict within your team. Then allow it, so long as you can move past it, keeping it light and healthy.”
Equally important is to manage priorities. As a new manager, in order to make sure that your larger goals are achieved, you need to manage day-to-day priorities. It is your job to keep everyone on your team on track, whether you are managing a project, time, people, or resources. It is a matter of looking far and wide—keeping your eye on the big picture, while focusing on what is most important right now. All the while, you have to keep in mind that we all have a tendency to leave until later our least-favorite things-to-do.
How do you, as a new manager, measure the progress of someone on your team?
Herb says, “I always believe in having, at the most, three key initiatives for someone on your team to work on. Sometimes it is just one. Keep it simple, straightforward, and measurable. And be clear with each individual on your team what their goal is, and how what they are doing contributes to the overall goals of your organization. That way everything is in the open, and you are perceived as fair. Then you can measure progress, and how close the person is to obtaining his or her individual goal. As a manager, it is letting everyone on your team know that you are in it, together, with them, sharing ideas, concerns, and accomplishments. And that they can make a difference. Let them know how important they are, while always using the word we.”
In keeping with this advice, it is most important to honor yourself and to honor those with whom you chose to surround yourself. Create a tone of continual learning, for yourself and for those around you. As if it is your mantra, repeat often and with conviction that you are committed to everyone in your organization constantly finding ways to keep learning and getting better. “Regardless of how well things may be going right now, the future is around the corner, always presenting new challenges and opportunities,” Herb says. Staying the same is a sure way to fall behind.
One final piece of advice for a new manager is to consider what you will do when the first mistake happens. Because it will, so be ready for it. Keep taking risks and encourage everyone on your team to do the same. Realize that there will be mistakes and that’s OK. But, more important, realize that the first time a mistake occurs, whether it is something that you happen to cause or someone on your team inadvertently caused, how you handle it will set the tone for how you are perceived afterward.
So, be ready for things to go wrong. But don’t get upset because it happened on your watch. Let your team know that you are all in it together. Consciously get ready to shrug your shoulders. And smile. Allow mistakes to happen—so that you can learn from them. That is the only way you will see new and innovative ideas flourish.
On a final note, Herb says, “One of our clients, who heads up human resources for a Fortune 500 Company, told me that she reminds the managers in her company that they go home to dinner every night with everyone they work with.” That’s a funny thing to think about. That accounts for a lot of dinners we may not realize we are having. But, as a manager, you are, in fact, part of the dinner conversation with everyone on your team. Whether you set a wonderful tone or whether you are, in fact, driving people absolutely crazy, every day, there is a new example of who you are and how you come across.
Are you fair? Inconsistent? Moody? Inspiring? Indecisive? Clear on your vision?
People will either need to recover from being with you or want to share how fortunate they feel to be among the few lucky ones who have a truly great boss.
In the end, the message is to believe in yourself—as you believe in those with whom you surround yourself. And let them know that. Say it out loud. What happens when someone believes in you? You excel. You stretch. And, sometimes, you even surprise yourself.
What Are You Practicing?
Musicians have a saying that if you don’t practice for one day, you’ll notice. If you don’t practice for a second day, other musicians will notice. And if you don’t practice for a week, the audience will notice.
So, what are you practicing now?
Musicians can practice running scales from the top to the bottom of their instrument’s range. Or, they can practice rhythmic challenges, new concepts, or work on particularly difficult pieces that require enormous dexterity.
The notion of practicing is something that leaders could learn a lot about by listening to musicians.
So, what is it that you are practicing?
This is not something that most leaders think—or even talk—about. We usually just do whatever it is we’re doing. As leaders, we live more in a world of doing than practicing.
But musicians, regardless of how accomplished they are, always practice.
That’s interesting to think about.
What would be different if you were practicing? What would you practice? Would it be communicating your vision? Implementing your plans? Measuring progress? Recognizing success? Mentoring others? Honing your intuition? Staying focused on what is important? Being more flexible? Getting more in tune with yourself? Connecting more with others?
What are you practicing? It’s a question worth asking yourself.
Listen and learn from musicians.
You can take your leadership skills to a whole new level by figuring out what you are going to start practicing.
Today. Tomorrow. Next week. And beyond.
Questions to Ask Yourself About Being Satisfied
These questions are posed for you to consider as you create your own vision, tap into your personal strengths, and pursue your own leadership journey. Your answers to these questions will provide a starting place for you to consider how your attitude about being satisfied plays into your approach to leadership. You are encouraged to consider these questions at different times, as your answers will undoubtedly evolve and change as your leadership journey unfolds.
1. What drives you?
2. Are you always challenging yourself?
3. When are you satisfied?
4. When are you not satisfied?
5. Is “good enough” ever good enough for you?
6. Can you find that precarious balance between always striving, while savoring your successes?
7. Are your sights always set higher?
8. What is your ultimate dream? What do you really want?
9. What are you willing to do to bring that dream alive?
10. How can you connect your potential with your dream?
11. What would it be like to live your dream?
