Chapter Seventeen

 

 

 

Laura

 

As I stare out of the window and watch the trees go by, it finally sinks in that I am never going home. To my father, to Eight, to anything that I ever knew or loved. I’ve lost everything now, traded in a life of comfort for one of complete uncertainty. So much weight has been put on my heart in the past few days, but finally my strength has met its limit. I am breaking.

“Laura, are you okay back there?” Ryan asks, eyeing me from the rearview mirror.

“I’m fine,” I say, though it’s far from true. There is one way that Ryan can help, however. I could use a nice distraction. “So, do you have any more secrets you want to tell us?”

“Yeah, I have at least ninety-seven questions that I’d like to ask you,” Shane says, leaning his head back on the car’s leather seat and putting his arm around me. I leave it there, resting in the comfort Shane brings. At least I will have someone familiar to look out for me wherever we’re going.

“Same here. For starters, how is a rebel your daughter but you’re the head of the Royal Guard?” I ask. Taeler and Ryan don’t favor each other, so the thought that they might be related had never entered my mind. How could such a reckless girl come from someone so calm and in control?

“Well, I don’t think that position is going to belong to me anymore after today.” Ryan chuckles, shaking his head. “For a long time, my true loyalty has been with the rebellion. Actually…I’m the leader of it. I have always been a close friend of your father’s, but after he made some questionable decisions and forced me to abandon my family, I started the rebellion that has been growing for the past seventeen years.”

I don’t know what to say to this. Everyone my father has ever trusted has betrayed him. Alicia, Ryan and now me. No wonder he is so cruel. After all of the lies he has endured, how could he be any different?

“My identity has been kept a secret so that I could continue my work as head of the guard, orchestrating things from the palace. My position as Peter’s second-in-command gave me the ability to place rebels in the palace, in training camps… Anywhere that I saw fit, really.”

“So what you’re saying is that you’ve lied to me my whole life,” I say, sighing and returning my gaze to the trees outside my window.

I’ve been betrayed too, just like my father. Three times, by three different people. Instead of enraging me, I just find it exhausting. I am too tired and too hurt to be angry.

“Oh, Laura, don’t think of it like that—” Ryan begins, but Shane cuts him off.

“She has every right to think of it like that. You’ve been pretending to be on her side for her entire life, but really, you’ve been plotting to kill her father, and you’ve got her older sister all roped up in this nonsense,” he says, crossing his arms.

Even though he’s lost his position as my bodyguard and I’ve likely lost my role as Princess, Shane is still protecting me. In the midst of all the sadness that overwhelms me, this makes me smile.

“It isn’t like that at all. It’s true, many rebels do want Peter dead, but I’m not one of them. In fact, I even agree with Peter in some aspects. I think that it should be Laura, not Eight or Alicia, who inherits the throne. Laura and Eight are the only people in their family who don’t let rage or hate cloud their judgment, but Laura is the only one fit to rule a country.”

“Eight would be a fine ruler—” Alicia begins, but Ryan glares at her from the rearview mirror and she immediately shuts her mouth. As much as I care for my sister, I’ve had enough of her insensitivity for one day.

“Alicia, your brother is far too naïve to ever have a chance at ruling Karkonia successfully. Laura, on the other hand, has a good balance of intellect and compassion. For her entire life, she has done nothing but think of what would be good for Karkonia—not for herself or for revenge, which is what you and your father focus on. She cares for her people and wants only what is best for this country, which is why she alone is worthy of ruling it,” Ryan says, finishing the argument.

Even if he did betray me, I’m glad he’s still on my side. Ryan is a powerful ally to have. Even if my father announces that he’s with the rebellion, many of our people will still follow and respect him. He’s loved by all of Karkonia, known for his wise counsel.

“But if you want me to become empress and father wants the same, why is there a problem? Just let things be,” I say, a bit perplexed. If the royal family and the rebellion have the same goals, why is there even a need for a rebellion?

“If your father is left unchecked, he will start wars that he can’t win. Peter used to be a good man, Laura. You often remind me of the way that he was when we were young, always looking for a way to better Karkonia. But power and greed have since corrupted him, and now that’s all he cares about. He wants an empire, no matter the cost to our people.”

“If I’m so much like him now, don’t you worry that power and greed will corrupt me too?”

“No, I don’t. I have faith in you, Laura. If you abandon your notions of becoming the heartless empress that your father wants you to be, you can become the ruler that he should have been,” Ryan says. “I started the rebellion not to usurp your father, but to keep him in check. Without us, Karkonia would have crumbled years ago.”

I think of the battles that our army has fought with the rebels in recent years. They’ve been a constant annoyance to my father, one that he has worked for so long to get rid of. And Ryan’s right. The rebels have certainly delayed his plans for war with Malibah. I want to believe Ryan is telling the truth, that he always had Karkonia’s interests at heart. But how can I believe him when he’s lied to me for my entire life? This is too hard, too much. I just want to go home.

But I can’t. I have no home anymore, and although I wish it weren’t true, I have no choice but to trust Ryan. Whether I like it or not, my life and my future are in his hands now.

“I can see how that could be true,” I admit, “but I’m still very hurt, Ryan. Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve negotiated with Father—”

“Laura, don’t pretend you wouldn’t have been angry with me. You would’ve had me killed on the spot,” Ryan begins.

“She didn’t have me killed,” Shane interjects, “and I betrayed her. She would’ve given you a chance to explain.”

“How could I know that? Especially while Peter has spent the past six years training her to be just like him. How could I know that she wouldn’t immediately kill me? Turn me in?”

“You say you see good in her. You should’ve trusted that,” Shane says, but I stop him.

“Enough already. Fighting won’t solve this. Yes, maybe Ryan should have trusted me, but he was right to fear me. I’ve changed a lot since you came around, Shane. If Ryan had told me before, it is possible that I would’ve killed him to please my father,” I say, looking down at my feet.

Befriending Shane has changed me, as has being reunited with my sister. They reminded me of the girl I used to be, when I was innocent and young and thought that there was good in everyone.

Maybe I was right back then. Not all rebels are good, but Shane has showed me that some of them are. And Alicia has shown me that even my father, who I believed to be the most wonderful man in the world, is susceptible to evil. My whole world has been turned upside down, but now my eyes are finally open.

I’m waking up.

“For a long time, Laura, we had hoped that you would show signs of rejecting your father’s dreams of power, but we only found that you wanted to build a Karkonian Empire as much as he did,” Ryan says, a sad look in his hazel eyes.

“I don’t think that’s true now. I don’t know what I want anymore, but anything that involves war isn’t it. We need peace. Karkonia needs peace,” I say.

Ryan smiles. “And with you, we can achieve it.”

“How so? Father wants a war.”

“We have a plan, Laura. Alicia and I have been working on this for a long time, and now that you’re with us, it just might work,” Ryan begins, full of excitement.

“I’m not with you, and I’m not with Father. I’m with Karkonia,” I say.

My country doesn’t need a power hungry emperor or a rebellion. They need an end to the war and destruction that my father and the rebels have caused.

“Laura, we are too. You don’t have many options right now. You could return to the palace and try to persuade your father to stop the war, although it’s very doubtful that he would actually listen to you at this point. Or, you can ally yourselves with us and we will help you take the throne. If you want peace for Karkonia, you need us,” Ryan says.

Unfortunately, he’s right.

As much as I hate to admit it, I do need the help of the rebellion. I want to help my country but I don’t stand a chance of accomplishing anything alone. If I want peace for Karkonia, I’ll need support, and that’s not something I’m likely to get from my father. When he wakes, he’ll think I’ve betrayed him too, and he’ll be right. I have.

I could try to win the hearts of the people by myself, but without Ryan to keep my father from sending us to war, I don’t have the time to even attempt such a thing. Allying myself with the rebellion is the only option I have, at least for now. I need someone to endorse me, and they’re the only willing candidates.

“All right. I’ll become your ally on one condition,” I say, crossing my arms and looking into the reflection of Ryan’s stare in the mirror.

“And what is that?” he asks.

“Let Shane and his sister be free,” I demand.

When I say the words, Shane’s face lights up. Back at the palace, I promised him that I would help him, and now that I can’t grant him royal protection, maybe this is it. This is what I can do to ensure that he and Lainey have a safe and happy life, even if it means that I’ll never see him again.

But it doesn’t look like I will get my wish.

When I give my terms for the agreement, Ryan’s face hardens and he turns his attention back to the road. “I can’t do that.”

“Of course you can, Ryan, just—”

“I can’t, Laura. Shane will never be free of the rebellion because of his connection to me.”

“What are you talking about, Ryan? I don’t have any connection to you,” Shane shouts, now sitting upright, glaring ahead at the Jeep’s driver.

“Yes you do. You… You just don’t know it. Shane… You… You’re my son.”