SEPARATED FATHER

MARK HALLIDAY

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Driving along the city’s edge at night

he obeys all traffic signals with chilly prudence.

God might be watching for an excuse to nail him.

He has ceased to live in the house where his daughter lives.

What could be more wrong?

Yet the car is running smoothly; it doesn’t know

what kind of man is at the wheel. Indeed

most people seem unable to read on his face

what he has done. Lone cowboy of the night

beyond civilization, he feels ice-gloved

in the unmistakable primacy of self,

who used to think he’d do anything

for his little girl. When he drives past the house

at 2 A.M., slowly, to see her dark window

and believe she is sleeping soundly, he recognizes himself

as protagonist of more than one rather dreary short story

but now it’s him,

it’s him

and the moon is so bright:

above his car and later above his tiny new apartment

it is so damned

bright that no one (not his wife, not any smart or wise person)

can tell him it isn’t romantic. Unfortunately

it is romantic. So

he has a new phone, and he has one mint wrapped in silver

from a restaurant called La Famiglia, where no one knew he was a dad;

and he’ll phone the woman who changed the meaning of joy.