SO LONG LONELY AVENUE

JAMES HARMS

“In this case I think it’s better to face it—we belong together.”

— RICKIE LEE JONES

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I remember Lani floating from her body

and asking me to ask the surgeon for her teeth.

And how she sang over and over

“We belong together,” while I carried her

to the car and folded her in, slipped a prescription

in her blouse and put her hand there, as if

pledging her allegiance, or holding her heart in.

We drove across Bloomington,

the spring air thick as a thousand feet of water.

Lani sang in her seat at a stop light as a boy

in a blue Chevy watched and frowned,

his idle erasing her song. Her head

lolled back like a child’s beneath a night sky—

stars for the begging, the moon

dripping into a pail of old rainwater.

She kept singing, “We belong together.”

I carried her up the stairs to bed and brought her

soup and straws to sip it through,

I brushed her hair one hundred times.

A week later, with cheeks like Dizzy Gillespie

and codeine in her veins,

Lani searched all day for cilantro

and made salsa in the middle of Indiana.

We trimmed our three rooms

with white, red and green, and invited everyone

we sort of liked to our place

for Cinco de Mayo. It was a night where

people fell down a great deal.

All year we’d looked for that apartment,

where she could work and I could work

and we could throw parties and be better forever.

But that was a small, wound-up idea

of how two people come into each other’s arms

repeatedly for the time it takes to

ask for everything, and to take what’s given.

Then, one day, he asks for something

she doesn’t have, something she’s never had,

and he asks because he knows this, that

she can’t give anymore. So he leaves.