Ellie felt like a coyote caught in a trap, ready to chew off her own foot in order to escape. Trouble was, there wasn’t anywhere to escape to and nothing to escape from as best she could tell.
She couldn’t even explain to herself what was wrong. Just some massive foreboding anxiety, like waiting for a tornado to hit. She was simply antsy as hell and needed something to keep her hands and her mind busy. Right this minute.
All around her the kitchen bustled with activity, but each time she offered to help, she was refused.
“Water, water everywhere, nor any drop to drink…” she muttered. The line from one of the classics she’d studied in school popped into her memory, and for the first time she felt as though she completely related to it. It seemed as though everyone but she had something to do.
“What is it you say, lass?” The big cook swirled past her in a cloud of flour and cinnamon.
“How about the wash? I could help with the laundry.” She’d seen how hard the women worked at that particular task, how very long it took.
Bridey laughed as she smacked her fist into a big lump of rising dough. “It’s no wash day, milady, or I just might take you up on that offer. Now off with you. Yer underfoot here in my kitchen and I’ve baking to do.”
“Can I help with—”
“No,” Bridey interrupted. “Now go on. Be a good lass and find something else to do with yerself.”
Ellie wandered into the great hall where Anna and some of the other girls were cleaning tables to prepare for the midday meal. She reached for one of the pails of soapy water, but Anna’s hand over her own stopped her.
“Dinna even think to do that,” the girl cautioned as she shook her wild mop of red curls. “Bridey would have my hide if she found you in here cleaning.”
“Come on, Anna. I’m going absolutely nuts if I don’t find something to do with myself!”
“I’ve something you both can do.” Sallie leaned awkwardly against the door, her hands splayed across her huge stomach. “My daughter has decided it’s time to meet the world. I need you to find my mother and Ran. Quickly.”
One look at the expression on Sallie’s face and Ellie started off at a run. “I’ll find Ran. You get Rosalyn,” she shouted over her shoulder as she hurried out across the hallway and through the big entry door.
Gathering her skirts up in one arm, she raced across the courtyard, slowing for a moment to yell up at the guards on the wall walk who stared down at her.
“The MacPherson! Where is he?”
The big guard lifted an arm, pointing. “The stables, milady.”
She didn’t need him to add that her exposed legs were improper. She could see judgment in his expression. He could glower until his face fell off for all Ellie cared. Right now she was a woman on a mission, and speed meant more to her than some ideal of modesty.
She ran for all she was worth, across the bailey, into the stable yard and through the open doors of the stable itself.
“Ranald MacPherson!” she yelled as she entered, stopping to bend from the waist and catch her breath for a moment.
From one of the stalls in the back came a muffled “Aye?”
“It’s time! Hurry up. Sallie needs you.”
She barely had the words out of her mouth before he stood in front of her, bare-chested and dirty, a wooden paddle-shaped shovel in one hand.
“It’s my Sallie’s time?” He threw down the tool without waiting for her answer and began to run.
Once again, Ellie hiked up her skirts and took off after him. Halfway across the courtyard she’d nearly caught up when a sound caught her attention.
A low, keening howl.
She paused, scanning the courtyard, listening intently.
Nothing.
She shook her head at her own imagination. Must be the excitement of the moment getting to her after such a long, dull spell.
Hurrying, she entered the keep in time to see Ran scoop his wife into his arms and bolt up the stairs with what looked like every female in the place following in his footsteps.
Except Bridey. The old cook stood at the bottom of the stairs, a silly grin on her face.
“That’s what every woman should have. A husband who loves her so much, he’d gladly make the fool of himself.”
“I didn’t think men in this time were with their wives when the women delivered babies.” Ellie caught herself and quickly amended her question when she saw the puzzled expression on the woman’s face, “Here in Scotland, I mean.”
Bridey nodded as if that made more sense to her. “It’s the same everywhere, I’d fancy. I dinna ken any who do.” The wide smile returned as she leaned close to confide, “Ah, but there would be the devil to pay with Lady Rosalyn if Ran dinna attend to Sallie. And after all these years, I suspect the lad wants to be with her. Did you no see the way he looked at her? It’s so romantic.”
Missy’s sharp bark interrupted Bridey’s confidences.
Ellie looked down to find the little dog fairly dancing around her feet.
Stop shutting us out! Hurry!
“What?”
Missy ran toward the entry door, her nails clicking on the smooth stones.
Baby needs you.
Excusing herself, Ellie followed more slowly, the whine she thought she’d heard earlier returning and growing stronger. As she realized the sound wasn’t in her ears but in her mind, she picked up speed. In the courtyard she paused, unable to locate the source of the sound.
“Where is he?”
Outside the walls.
Up the stairs to the wall walk she raced, ignoring the shout of the big guard as she leaned over the edge to look down below. Sure enough, Baby lay just outside the gates, his whimper clear in her mind now.
“Open the gates,” she instructed the startled guard.
“Sorry, milady. My orders are to open only for recognized riders. Seeing as there’s no one there…” He let the thought dangle as he stared at her.
“My dog,” she countered irritably. “My dog is down there. Now open the gates or I’ll do it myself.”
The guard crossed his arms, a grin spreading over his face. “No, milady, I dinna believe you’ll be doing that anytime soon.”
Ellie glared at the man, quickly realizing she wasn’t getting anywhere. “I swear they must sprinkle the food with stubborn around here,” she huffed, turning to go back down the stairs.
The muffled “There’s a good lass” from behind her did nothing for her mood.
If that big goon thought she was going to simply give up, he could just think again.
She stood at the inner gate, staring through the grate down the long dark tunnel. There had to be a switch or a handle or something around here. How did they lift the massive gates? To her right she noticed a low doorway built into the wall.
Missy’s frantic urging and Baby’s pathetic whimpers continued to grow louder, filling her head. How she’d managed to shut it out before was beyond her understanding.
“Quiet! I can’t think,” she hissed as she stepped into a small dark room.
“Pardon?” The guard inside, the same one she’d encountered once before on the wall walk, looked up in surprise from the floor where he sat rubbing a cloth up and down the length of a sword.
“My dog’s caught outside the gates. I need you to open them.”
He shook his head, a patronizing smile lighting his face before he returned his attention to the weapon in his lap. “I canna open the gates without the man on the wall gives me leave. It’s orders.”
“Look.” She paused, searching her mind for the man’s name. “Gregor. Please help me.”
Again the old man shook his head stubbornly. “Without the order, I’ll no open the gates. Now be a good lass and run along.”
If one more person told Ellie to “be a good lass” today, she was going to scream. She clenched her teeth against the irritation she felt and looked around the little room. Mounted on the wall were a series of gears with a large chain looped around them leading to what looked like the steering wheel on a pirate ship. That had to be what she wanted.
Fine. They wouldn’t help? She’d damn well do it herself.
Ellie threw herself at the wheel, pulling down with all her strength.
It didn’t budge.
“Here now!” Gregor yelled, on his feet amazingly fast for such a large man.
Though he grabbed her around the waist and pulled, she held on for all she was worth.
“Open the damn gate!” she shouted over his rumblings to let go.
“What have we here?” Dair’s huge shoulders filled the small doorway as he entered. “Unhand the lady, Gregor. What would yer missus be thinking of you now?”
“She’s trying to raise the gates,” the guard huffed, backing away.
Ellie kept her hands clenched on the wheel, watching the two men. “My dog is trapped outside the gates. He needs me. And these…” She floundered for something appropriately harsh to call the guards who frustrated her efforts. “These men won’t listen to me.”
Dair’s lips rolled in as if he bit them to keep from smiling and he quickly looked down at the floor. When he lifted his head, his expression was blank. “Gregor, lift the portcullis for the lady.”
“I canna. The MacPherson gave us strict orders after the shepherds reported Gilberd’s disappearance. We’re no to open the gates without…” The old guard sputtered.
“On my authority, Gregor. Lift the grates. Milady? May I escort you out to retrieve yer animal?” Dair lifted an elbow, offering his arm.
Ellie backed away from the wheel, watching as Gregor slapped a lever before easily turning the crank.
“Well, no wonder,” she muttered as she took Dair’s arm and tried to reclaim some modicum of dignity, grateful Caden wasn’t around to see this latest demonstration of her inappropriate behavior.
Through the first gate, she let go of Dair’s arm and ran to the far gate, bending to slip under as it opened.
Baby lifted his head, panting.
“You poor thing. You’re exhausted. She dropped to her knees and cuddled the dog’s head in her lap. He shouldn’t be here. He was supposed to be watching over Caden. The realization sent a lurch through her stomach even before she asked the obvious question.
“What’s wrong, Baby? What’s happened to Caden?”
“I willna allow it.” Dair crossed his arms in front of him. “It’s no proper for a lady.”
Ellie clasped her hands in her lap, counting to ten to keep her temper in check for at least the hundredth time since she’d walked into this room. She had to remember the mind-set of the men in this day and age. Alasdair Maxwell couldn’t help acting like a medieval macho knuckle-dragger. It’s what he was.
“Mayhap you can follow the animal, Dair. Just to see if it’s even the truth.” Alycie spoke from her seat against the wall.
Rosalyn sat across the desk from Ellie, her own hands clenched tightly enough her fingers had lost their color. She looked up and captured Ellie’s gaze, as if she desperately searched for some solution to their troubles. Some solution that could only come from Ellie.
“Well, crap,” Ellie muttered rising from her chair and taking a deep breath. The knuckle-dragger was just going to have to get over himself. “It is the truth. Don’t bother asking how I know. You’re simply going to have to trust me on this one. And no, you can’t just follow the dog. I’m going.”
She’d made up her mind. For all she knew, this was what she’d been sent to do. And she certainly didn’t intend to blow the opportunity to get home if it was. More important, Caden needed help and he was going to get it. From her. He believed in her enough to have sent the dog with a message asking for help and she wasn’t going to let him down.
“It’s no proper…” Dair began his litany again.
Her counting and clenching were at an end. The anger she’d contained so “properly” bubbled over. “What happened to you being pledged to my service?”
She waited only a moment, glaring at the silent knight. “Yeah, I thought as much. Listen to me, soldier boy. I don’t give a rat’s ass about ‘proper.’ I’m going after Caden if it hairlips every cow in the state of Texas, and you can either come with me or not. Your choice.”
Behind her, Rosalyn rose from her seat to come around the desk and stand beside Ellie. “The lass speaks the truth. She must go. Will you no, as a personal favor to me, protect her on her journey?”
“I’ll come along with you, Dair,” Alycie stood and walked to her brother’s side. “With me to chaperone, you’ll no have to fear for her reputation, aye?”
Dair’s glower lit on each woman in turn. “I canna fight the lot of you, can I?” He sighed and threw his arms into the air. “Verra well. It is decided. I canna allow you to go alone, so I go as yer protection, milady.”
Ellie didn’t mistake his bow for anything other than the sarcasm he intended, but it didn’t matter. It didn’t even matter that Miss Perfect was coming along.
Caden believed her. He’d trusted in her enough to send Baby with his message and she was going to save Caden. Then he and his beloved could get married and have lots of perfect, proper little children.
And she could go home.
“I really do have to get going.” Ellie stroked a finger over the downy soft forehead of the baby in Sallie’s arms. Such a tiny little creature with such serious blue eyes.
Sallie shifted, obviously trying to find a comfortable spot in the bed where she sat and instantly her husband was at her side, helping to adjust her pillows. She smiled as he paused to stroke a big finger over his daughter’s forehead just as Ellie had done.
“I ken yer need to be off, but I want to give you something to take along. Ran?”
Her husband moved to the end of the bed and opened the lid of a large chest, pulling out what looked to Ellie like a simple bundle of cloth. He laid it on the foot of the bed and unwrapped it carefully, revealing two belts and two small daggers, which he placed beside his wife before taking their daughter from her arms.
“Several years ago I learned the hard way of the need to protect myself. I’ve worn these ever since. I would feel so much better if you would take them along with you.” Sallie moved the weapons to her lap.
“I don’t think I could…” Ellie began, but Sallie was hearing none of it.
“You can. Many women in our time wear a belted dagger at their waist. Many claim it’s for household use, but I ken the truth of it. Our men willna be there always when we need them. We have to take responsibility for our own protection.”
Ellie stifled a grin. Apparently she’d been way off base in believing all the women here were meek and subservient. This one, at least, was clearly as serious about self-defense as anyone Ellie had met in her own time.
She reached out and took the smaller dagger and belt from Sallie and fastened it around her own waist. With its pretty jeweled handle, it looked almost like jewelry.
“There. Now if I can just manage to wear this without stabbing my leg, I should be in fine shape defending myself.”
Sallie shook her head, a look of irritation settling on her face. “Dinna be thinking like a fool-headed woman. Do you no realize if yer taken, they’ll see that weapon and remove it? You’ll no be able to stop them. We canna be as strong as the men who seek to harm us, so we must be smarter.” She lifted the second dagger, longer than the first and very thin. “While many a lady wears something like what you have at yer waist, no so many have one of these. Here. You hide this one. I strap it to the inside of my leg. Here.” She slapped the inside of her thigh before holding the weapon and strap out.
Ellie had misjudged her. Sallie was way more serious about self-defense than Ellie had ever thought of being.
“Thank you.” Ellie accepted the knife and leaned in to give Sallie a hug. “I’ll wear it, I promise. I really have to go. They’re waiting for me.”
Hurrying down the hallway, Ellie considered the lethal-looking weapon. Sallie might appear to be a petite, helpless woman, but Ellie could learn a thing or two from her. Somehow she couldn’t imagine Sallie allowing anyone to move into her family home and take it over like Ray had done to her.
She entered her room and started to strap the knife to her inner thigh.
No, that might work for someone like Sallie, but Ellie had proven herself less than graceful on too many occasions since she’d been here to try that. She’d likely end up cutting a slice off her horse or severing her own artery at the rate she’d been going. The leg strap wouldn’t work for her.
She leaned over the chest at the foot of her bed and lifted the lid, digging through the clothing she’d worn since she’d been here. There, at the very bottom, she found what she sought. Her bra and panties, tucked in the corner where she’d placed them that first day.
She unlaced her overdress and tugged off her shift before stabbing the dagger through the elastic back of the bra. She slipped her arms into the lacy straps and snapped the little fastener closed between her breasts before pulling up her shift and overdress.
Satisfied she was ready, she headed for the courtyard, where Dair and his sister waited, conscious of the feel of the little garment she’d once taken so for granted. Though the elastic now felt restrictive and uncomfortable, the cold blade had warmed against the skin of her back and hardly felt out of place at all.
She could get used to this. And though she didn’t expect she’d ever be a major ass kicker, she was beginning to believe that just maybe she could be a force to be reckoned with. It gave her a rare sense of control over her destiny and made her feel for a brief moment like a heroine out of those books she loved so much.
Confidently Ellie pushed through the great entry door to begin her journey.