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★☆★☆★
How many missed calls and texts was I going to avoid? I thought about changing my number, but shit, then my controlling mother would ask why I changed it. Not to mention, I wasn’t going to stay in San Diego forever. I knew I’d be back in Northern Cali after I graduated. Who wants to deal with changing their area code and getting a new number? This one I’d had since high school and I wasn’t changing it.
So... screw Chris and all his stalkerific ways.
I couldn’t believe it had been a year since we’d broken up. It wasn’t like I could just push him from my mind and heart when he continually pursued me. I wish he didn’t. I wish he hated me. I wish he thought I was gross, repulsive, and would just ignore me. But he didn’t. He called and/or texted at least once a week. And like a dumbass, I would sometimes respond to him. Why couldn’t I let him go? I should be angry, hurt, and have enough strength and resolve to just tell him to go to hell. But I couldn’t. Shame on me. Unavailable men – that’s one weakness I’d have to work on. I couldn’t afford weaknesses in my life. Not at this point.
I had just come out of Statistics class. It was a Friday and I was wiped out. All I wanted to do was sleep, but of course when I got a text from Jayda asking if we were going to TJ tonight, there was no way I was going to stay home. Homework be damned.
I am sooo gonna flunk outta college.
The hot shower felt good, and I put on a short skirt and a loose pink tank top with some cowboy boots. After I’d abused my long blonde hair with the flat iron and put on enough lip gloss to be seen from space, I grabbed my purse and headed downstairs, where Steph was waiting for me in her little Volkswagen Beetle. Jayda was in the passenger seat.
“You ready to get your party on in TJ, girl?” she asked, eyeing me up and down.
I smirked. “Oh, yeah.”
It had been a few months since I’d been out with my friends. Between the breakup with Chris, and now my recent breakup with Jason, another Marine I’d been seeing, I’d turned into kind of a homebody – and I kinda hated it. Jason and I didn’t last because he’d be gone for weeks on some mission – which sucked, by the way, because I always thought he was lying and was really with some girl... my trust had been shot all to hell.
Thanks, Chris, you asshole.
The girls made small talk about school and guys while we sipped Everclear from a plastic bottle, each letting out a whoop and a grimace as we sucked down the alcohol that tasted like, well, rubbing alcohol. I was rockin’ a nice buzz as we pulled up to the club in Tijuana. As soon as Stephanie parked the car, she took a few quick swigs from the bottle and threw it, now empty, back into the car. We looped arms as we walked into the El Gato club and paid our cover charge. It never failed to amuse me that they didn’t ask for I.D. Of course I didn’t mind. I was already 22 so it didn’t matter, but I still found it odd.
As I eyed the bar, a twinge of sadness blanketed my body and I felt my stomach clench. I hadn’t been here since the night I’d met Chris, and of course I was reminded of our first dance and all that. I shook my blonde head and tried to smile. I didn’t need Chris and all his cheating ways... even if he was the hottest thing I’d ever had the pleasure of pleasuring.
Many times over.
Jayda ordered shots of tequila and handed me one. She recited our favorite toast: “Here’s to the men that we love. Here’s to the men that love us. But the men that we love aren’t the men that love us. So fuck the men, here’s to us!” The three of us screamed in laughter then downed our shots. It burned a trail down through my chest and into my belly until a satisfied smile decorated my full, glossy lips.
I set my shot glass down on the bar. Lots and lots of military men in this place. I heaved out a sigh at all the eye candy and tried to push my brain away from Chris and his delectable body and talented tongue.
“Let’s dance!” Jayda yelled, grabbing my arm.
I smiled in agreement and followed her to the dance floor. Along with Stephanie, we writhed against each other to the beat of the music to many male admirers. I found a small satisfaction in the fact that so many superhot guys were watching us dance. I really wanted – no, needed – to make out with a guy tonight. I could close my eyes and pretend they were Chris as I raked my fingernails over the short hair on their head.
After about four dances, I was at the bar ordering a Jack and Coke and I heard a male voice breathe into my ear.
“You are a great dancer.”
I turned around to see a guy with an amused expression on his very masculine face. He was definitely a Marine and had dark brown hair in that telltale regulation haircut. My knees buckled a little when I saw him smiling down at me.
His eyes were a very light color, and as hard as I tried, I couldn’t not look down at his tight chest and arms as they were hugged by his dark T-shirt. The region under my skirt clenched a little, and I had to mentally tell myself to plaster on a smile and act aloof. I really just wanted to throw myself at and on this guy.
“So I’ve been told,” I responded coolly.
He smirked again, and I noticed he had nice teeth. I tried not to stare at them. “Wanna dance again, or are you taking a breather?” he asked right before he pressed a beer bottle to his lips. I suddenly really wanted to be that bottle.
I shook my head and set my shot glass down. “Sure, let’s go.”
He put his hand out and I took it, following him to the dance floor.
The song was a bit fast, but that didn’t stop him from putting his large hand on my hip and pulling me in close to him as we swayed together to some country song. It just dawned on me that they were playing country music in here. Last time I’d been here, they were playing hip-hop. I so did not care. He swung his hips with mine and as I tilted my head up, I looked into his light eyes as they caught the reflection of the pulsing lights of the club.
He smiled down at me, then put his lips to my ear. “What’s your name?”
“Miranda,” I said back into his. “You?”
“Braden.”
I smiled. Very hot name for a very hot boy with his very hot body pressed up against mine. I inadvertently pressed myself closer to him, suppressing a groan at the feel of his hard body against me.
His hand moved lower down my back into dangerous territory, and I wanted nothing more than for him to lean down and kiss me with those beautiful lips.
But instead of kissing him myself, I said into his ear, “You in the military, Braden?”
He nodded, the gel from his hair shining under the pulsating lights. “Yes, ma’am, Marine Corps.”
“Well, you certainly keep yourself in shape.”
Oh, my God, Miranda. Calm down!
He chuckled and practically licked my ear as he purred, “Oh, so do you, Miranda.”
I shivered as his breath tickled my ear, and decided I needed to get to know this guy better.
The song ended after some very dirty dancing by the both of us, and we headed back to the bar. Braden never let go of my hand, and his touch sent a rush of tingles throughout my body.
A knowing look by me to my girlfriends – with them nodding back to me with a wink – let me know that I was okay to leave with this guy.
And that’s exactly what I did.
***
I sat alone in this stranger’s bed, instant regret blanketing my heart. Why do I do this? Am I this insecure that I need to just sleep with random guys to boost my self-esteem? I justified to myself that it had been a while, since I had broken up with Jason anyway, but that really didn’t make me feel any better.
I didn’t know where Braden had gotten off to, maybe the bathroom, so I got up, threw my clothes on, and went to his fridge, helping myself to some bottled water. As I drank it, I found my purse and fished inside of it for my phone. I groaned as I saw two texts from Jason telling me he missed me.
I’m such a shitbag.
I didn’t even text him back. What good would that do? I didn’t miss him really. Who I really missed was Chris, but that was done and over with. I couldn’t have what I really wanted, because what I wanted wasn’t good for me. I wanted all the bad things Chris brought to the table, knowing they were unhealthy, but still, his face, his body, his words of pleading at the Starbucks the last time I’d seen him kept inundating my mind, and at times, I had to stop myself from getting all torn up and shedding a tear over the jerk.
But hadn’t he broken up with Amber? Begging me to come back to him since he had broken up with her? I shook my head as I shoved the phone back into my purse and raked my fingers through my hair. I was glad he’d broken up with her, but on the flip side, what did it matter? He had been with her while he had romanced me, kissed me, made love to me, taken me to heights I’d never experienced before... and Amber and I had both been victims of his charms. And what charms he had, too. I could see why Chris Ferguson would never, ever be alone. He had game. He was hot, and knew how to woo a girl out of her panties faster than a vampire flitting through the trees with a human girl on his back.
My thoughts were interrupted when Braden came back into the room wearing nothing but jeans. His bare chest was near perfection, those sex lines near his hipbones disappearing into his waistband. I had to tell myself to look into his face instead of his hard body. He sat down next to me and smiled.
“Sorry about that.”
I cocked my head to the side, looking confused but smiling. “What are you apologizing for?”
He cleared his throat and looked down. “Well, I was gonna at least try to romance you a little, ya know, offer you a drink and make out with you a bit. But you’re so freaking hot, I don’t know what came over me.”
I laughed. “No worries, Braden. You’re hot, too.” I leaned up and kissed his beautiful lips.
He smiled, his eyes twinkling. “Mmm,” he said. “You have a fabulous kiss, Miranda.”
“Thanks,” I replied lamely.
He said, “I can take you home, or you can stay the night here.”
I looked at him, contemplating his words. I then threw caution to the wind. What we had just done... I considered to be round one. So with a mischievous grin twisted up on my lips, I said, “Sure, Braden. I’d love to stay over.”