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★☆★☆★
Well, I got my wish. Cara didn’t go out with me anymore, because that guy she’d met at that military bar was taking up all her time. Apparently his name was Riley, and he was only staying the summer here in California, and then he had to go back to Colorado to his base.
Is she freaking for real? I thought I was stupid. She was even more stupid. Why on earth would she get involved with someone so unavailable? Once that thought flitted through my brain, I literally laughed out loud. Who was I to ask that sort of question? I wrote the book on attracting and dating unavailable guys. In fact, I had laughed so loud, Ashlynn put her doll down to look up at me with a questioning look in her big chocolate eyes.
I turned the stove off and put the noodles into a strainer while I walked over and scooped her up into my arms, planting a kiss onto her tiny, upturned nose.
“What are you laughing at, baby?”
She pointed a chubby finger at me. “Mommy, you were laughing.”
I chuckled again. For a two-year-old, she spoke pretty damn well, especially considering it was just her and me. Maybe that was why she talked so well. It wasn’t like she was around a lot of other kids. Only the ones at daycare, and occasionally, little Aiden, who hardly spoke at all.
Jason had indeed moved back to San Diego, as I suspected he would. And he and Aimee had had a super huge ridiculous wedding on the beach. The reason I knew this was because he had posted a zillion pictures of it on Facebook and I had seen it all. I’m glad he was happy, but he was kind of an asswipe for leaving his daughter.
Did I blame him for going back to where his family was? Not really, but what was more important? His new wife, or his daughter? Now Ashlynn was only gonna see her daddy in the summer and sometimes on Christmas or whenever he drove up here. We had never gone to court over this whole thing, because we’d never needed to. Jason had paid me a good chunk of change every month, and saw his daughter on weekends, so I had no reason to complain. But now that he had moved and remarried, things had changed.
Completely.
I hadn’t seen a dime from Jason in two months, and I had waited patiently for him to get a job in Southern California and send me some child support, but he just hadn’t. I was too busy and too tired to take legal action, so I just continued to wait, hoping he’d make good on his promise to send me some money.
Just another problem in my life I didn’t have time for. Not only was I short on my bills every month now, I never got a break. I loved my daughter more than life itself, but there were definitely times where it was nice when she was with her daddy so I could just unwind and let my mind rest. I didn’t have that now. And I was too prideful to ask my parents or sister to watch her unless I was really desperate. And I certainly wasn’t going to ask them for money.
I finished feeding Ashlynn her dinner of plain pasta and peas when I glanced at the clock on the stove: 6:10 p.m. I groaned. Was I really sitting at home on a Saturday night by myself? How had my life come to this? I again had to tell myself that it was time to grow up and be a parent and enjoy this time while Ashlynn was little and stop dwelling on being in a relationship. I did not, however, want to sit home. I was sort of amped up and needed to get some of my energy out so I decided I was gonna go to the gym.
I didn’t get to go very often, as I couldn’t go before work since daycare didn’t open that early, and then I felt guilty for going after work, putting her in the gym’s on-site childcare when she’d been in daycare all day. So I would usually just take her on stroller walks, or go to the gym when Jason had her, or when my parents would take her. So now that Jason was gone, I had zero help, which meant no gym time.
I parked the car and went inside and showed my still new-looking gym membership card and took Ashlynn to the on-site daycare facility. She practically wiggled out of my arms to get down once she saw all the toys and other kids in the room, which of course made me happy. She didn’t even look back once I’d closed the little half-door to the room and walked away. It made me smile.
This particular gym was pretty high-end. I was paying a good chunk for it every month and I shook my head as I realized I really should use it more often. It had everything from cardio machines, to free weights, to weight machines, and even juice bars and oxygen bars.
I decided to hit the dreaded Stairmaster to try to tone up my ass, and even though it was busier on a Saturday night than I thought it would be, it still wasn’t bad. I found a free one wedged between a really skinny blonde girl I tried not to stare at, and a huffing and puffing buffed bald black dude who I was afraid might sling sweat on me, he was pumping his arms so fast up and down on the machine.
I took the towel from around my neck and set it on the machine’s faceplate, along with my water bottle, and fumbled with the buttons until I found a comfortable setting to start at. I got into that rhythm and was quickly reminded of how out of shape I was.
Thankful for the distraction of the TV in front of me, I was glad I didn’t have to be alone with my thoughts, so to speak. I really began to get into a new reality show when suddenly 30 minutes had gone by. I was a sweaty mess, but the adrenaline high was awesome, and I was in a much better mood than when I’d arrived.
Wiping off my face and re-adjusting my ponytail, I walked to the weight machines and stood with my hands on my hips, trying to decide what to work on first. I really could use some arm work, but I needed to firm up my stomach, too.
While I was waffling back and forth, a deep, rich voice interrupted me, and I spun around to see who the voice belonged to.
“I would suggest the free weights,” he said.
I was immediately met with piercing aqua eyes, and as mine traveled down his face, I noticed very straight, white teeth, and a deep dimple on his right cheek. I tilted my head to the right, trying to remember where I knew this guy from. And more important than that, why someone so gorgeous would be speaking to me. I looked at his short, light-colored hair at the top and it reminded me of an athlete.
My amber-colored eyes grew wide. “Oh, my God. You’re Dalton’s brother, that baseball player!” I cringed at the sound of my own voice. I swear I heard myself squeak like an excited 16-year-old groupie.
His handsome face became even more handsome as it lit up in a genuine grin. “Yes, it’s Jace. And you’re Miranda, right?”
Both my eyebrows rose. “You remember my name from meeting me once in a dark club?”
He nodded, then lifted his orange plastic water bottle to his lips, taking a long sip. I watched with a little too much interest as his full lips hugged the nozzle and then his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed.
Then I had to swallow down my own embarrassment at gawking at him. I flicked my eyes back up to his.
“Of course I remember you,” he quipped. “You’re not easy to forget.”
I had to suck in my cheeks to keep from grinning. Wow, what a player. Just like I knew he was. Who says stuff like that? Players and guys with game, that’s who.
“Well, Jace, it was nice seeing you again. Have a nice workout. I’m gonna go hit the arm machines.”
“You sure you don’t want to use the free weights?” He jerked a thumb behind him. “I’ll spot you.” He had a wicked gleam in his eye.
I shook my head and turned on my heel toward the machines.
“Your loss, princess.”
I stiffened and turned around. “Excuse me?”
Half of his face kicked up into that cocky grin I was already beginning to love to hate, and he feigned innocence. “What?”
“Don’t call me that,” I said through my teeth.
It’s what my dad calls me. I wouldn’t let this guy or anyone else call me that.
“Then what can I call you?” He grinned, a curious look on a face that looked way too innocent for what I knew was probably lurking behind the charm and muscles.
I put my hands on my hips and tried not to smile. Charming asshole. He totally knew it, too. “Miranda works just fine.”
“And at what phone number would I reach her majesty, Miranda?”
I suppressed the urge to stomp my Nike-clad foot. I walked slowly toward him and got into his personal space. I realized I probably did not smell like roses, but I didn’t care. I craned my head to look up him, realizing he had to be at least six-three, and gulped down a strange desire that began to lick its way up my body, like a fire encouraged by gasoline. He smiled down at me, not backing down – and not smelling bad, either. In fact, he smelled quite good, and it just made me madder.
“I don’t know why you want to refer to me as royalty, but I’m not. What I am, though, is busy working out. Bye, Jace.”
I turned on my heel and stalked toward the weight machines without looking back and found the first available machine and sat down on it.
Fuck that guy.
***
It was Sunday and I had overslept. Ashlynn and I both. I hadn’t slept well, my thoughts and dreams kept drifting back to that sexy baseball player. His honeyed words from his clever tongue and all his good-smelling yumminess wasn’t going to break me down. I had been there, and I was done falling for unavailable, cocky assholes who would just hurt me in the end.
But was Jace really an asshole? I could tell by his demeanor that he kind of was. I, of course, didn’t know him at all, but I knew his kind. Like military men, he probably had a girlfriend in every city he would bang when he would visit, and then never call them again until he got back. Dalton had told me they were from the Bay Area – born and raised – and that Jace was beyond stoked when the local minor league team had scouted him out at the local university a couple years ago and recruited him.
That also brought up another point in my mind. How old was this guy? I was pushing 27, and he was probably still in his early 20s. Something else I didn’t need. Men were immature as it was, and I didn’t need that in my life at all.
I was going to pick up the phone to call my dad for advice, which I knew would probably not end in him telling me to stay away from the guy once he found out he was a baseball player, but I never got even the second number punched into my cell phone’s lock code in when my doorbell rang. I looked down at my yoga pants and prison T-shirt, and shook my head, which was in a ponytail again. My hair was so long and thick, I normally slept with it up to keep from getting it tangled in my arms or pillow, and I really hadn’t done anything since getting up except make coffee and dwell on a cute baseball player who I think was hitting on me at the gym.
I went to the door and threw back the small curtain on the window and saw Cara standing there, her son Aiden on her hip. I slid back the deadbolt and opened the door to find Cara’s eyes red-rimmed and full of despair. She looked like death warmed over, dressed similarly to me, and I became alarmed. As soon as I asked her what was wrong, her chest jerked in a sob and I quickly grabbed Aiden from her and ushered her inside. Ashlynn was in her room playing so I put Aiden in there with her and left the door cracked so we could talk.
Cara was wiping her eyes and nose with some tissue from a box next to my china hutch, and I walked over and hugged her. “What the hell is going on?”
Sadly, I kind of already knew. I had seen that look on plenty of faces while living in San Diego. But I let her speak.
“Riley’s... leaving.”
I tried to keep my face impassive as I said, “Of course he is, honey. But you knew this.” I swept some hair off her forehead. “Summer fling, remember?”
She shook her head. “No. He’s going to Afghanistan, and he has to leave in a week or two.”
Damn.
I swallowed back, wanting to cry with her. “For how long?”
She sniffled. “Six to nine months.”
Ouch.
I hugged her and led her to the couch, ordering her to sit. Pouring us both a glass of wine – yes it was only one in the afternoon but I didn’t care – I handed her one and she took a sip.
“I’m so stupid, Miranda. So stupid. You were right. What was I thinking?”
I chuckled. “You weren’t. These dudes are slick. They’re handsome and hot and lonely and you are their only focus... then they leave.” Or cheat on you, I wanted to add, but I didn’t, because she didn’t need to hear that, or my negativity right now.
“What are you gonna do, girl? Wait ‘til he gets back?”
She shook her head. “I think that’s another reason I’m so upset. Yes, he was supposed to be a summer fling. But it turned into more. We’d talked about trying a long-distance thing between here and Colorado, but here and frickin’ Afghanistan?”
I pursed my lips together and regarded her. She was whipped. There was no doubt about it. But I already knew that. She had told me all summer long that her Army guy was just a summer fling, and she was gonna let him go once the summer was over. But I wasn’t stupid; I saw the way she looked at him, the way his name would roll off her tongue like a reverent prayer. But I played along and nodded my head and encouraged her to let him go once the summer was over. She had a life here, a son whose father lived here and was involved, no matter how much of a prick that guy was, and her extended family, too. And of course me. I didn’t want some military guy whisking her off and away from us. But I was selfish like that.
We stayed and hung out at my house until it got dark, made a big, fattening lasagna with garlic bread and brownies, and ate until we both felt better. I so badly wanted to tell her about my interaction with Jace at the gym last night, but it didn’t seem like the appropriate time, and thought maybe I’d tell her another time.
Then I realized there really wasn’t much to tell. The guy didn’t even have my number, and unless he bugged Dalton for it, probably wouldn’t. How sad and desperate was I that I was excited to tell Cara about getting hit on at the gym?
Pathetic.
Cara and Aiden finally left and I was exhausted from playing counselor to my best friend. Not that I minded, really.
I shook my head as I placed my sweet daughter in her princess toddler bed, and smiled again at the royal theme of the room as I flipped off her light.
Your majesty. Really?