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Matt
There was little to accompany Matt when he woke up. He hadn’t expected Chris to be there; he already knew that he had to leave early, as he’d been informed as much amidst a bunch of longing kisses at the doorway last night.
They’d so nearly slept together. It was probably a good thing that they hadn’t – but now the lack of intimacy was extra stark. There wasn’t even a note waiting for him, or a box of aspirin on the counter or... anything, really. He was forced to wonder how Chris was feeling this morning. Was he hungover, or regretful, or both?
Preferably neither, of course. But that might be too much to hope for, given the amount they’d had to drink.
He took his time leaving the apartment, safe in the knowledge that it’d be secure behind him. Matt could only hope it wouldn’t be the last time he visited. Honestly, after the way he felt last night, he was willing to discard the no-dating-a-subject rule entirely.
Matt was kind of a cynical person by nature. He had to be, in this line of work; it was important to be guarded. However, even he knew that a connection like this was rare. The two men had clicked so quickly, and so definitively; it’d be foolish to throw away a bond like that. He’d spent enough time in the dating pool to know that you couldn’t force it, and should value it where it appeared.
Arriving at the stadium, however, he had a faint sense of despair. Matt wasn’t the type to believe in superstition or instinct or anything of the type – but he couldn’t fight the feeling that Chris was going to be distant again. As he came to sit in his spot on the stands, he found no evidence to shake that suspicion. Chris wasn’t looking up, and it seemed deliberate.
Matt sighed, pulling out his notepad again. It’d be just his luck to ruin things after they had gone so swimmingly – and after he’d been forced to acknowledge the strength of his attraction. When you were willing to sacrifice all your pre-existing principles to pursue a relationship with somebody, it had to mean something.
Usually, the other person felt something too.
Unfortunately, when Chris finally did look up in Matt’s direction, the worst-case scenario was confirmed. There was a look of shame on his face, and his jaw was clamped tight; he didn’t dare to look at Matt for long, or to wave as he had the first time they’d met. Darren Schloss was soon at his arm, pulling him away to talk about something.
No prizes for guessing what.
He sighed, turning down to his notepad. It was easier to look away and pretend he hadn’t seen it. After all, he was going to have to continue to be professional through all of this up-and-down he was getting from Chris. If that meant putting a wall up against his feelings, then... well. Better start now.
Damn it.
