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Matt
Nobody had really given him any solid details – and obviously none of this had been reported by any media. As such, there was nothing for Matt to do but nervously twiddle his thumbs and re-read the non-descriptive texts that the Rangers management had sent him. All he knew was that Chris had gotten into a fight, and that he needed Matt to be there as soon as possible.
Was he hurt, Matt wondered? Or had he hurt someone? It was difficult to say. Despite how violent the sport could get, Chris just wasn’t an aggressive person. For him to have gotten into a fight in the first place, something pretty awful must have happened.
Based on the fact that he had been called at all, Matt figured it had something to do with him, or at least with Chris’s sexuality.
Maybe they should have been prepared for this. Matt had tried to warn Chris that the first few practices would be tense and unpleasant, and that he should just try to keep his head down and act normal no matter what any homophobic jerks may throw at him. Apparently, that advice had fallen on deaf ears.
Of course, there was a slim chance this argument wasn’t about Chris’s sexuality at all, but somehow that seemed unlikely.
Matt could already imagine Chris’s flushed face and his indignation – the insistence that he hadn’t expected people to be this bad about it.
Chris was sweet, and there was something very endearing about introducing somebody to queer life. In fact, it was almost sexy. However, Matt could see that it might also get tiring. It had upset Chris so much just to see that stranger shift away from him at Starbucks. Of course he would probably overreact if his teammates weren’t great – but what did he expect?
It probably wasn’t fair to ask that of him. Most straight boys would never pay attention to how gay people were treated; it just didn’t apply to them or occur to them.
As he headed into the stadium and made his way directly to the staff area, Matt tried to ignore the knotting in his stomach. Despite how frustrated he already felt with the situation, he knew it was important to keep an open mind so that he could perform well on Chris’s side.
After all, no matter what had happened, it’d be Chris’s side that he took.
Right?
He was ushered into a meeting room, and came immediately face-to-face with one of the team’s senior player liaison officers, Chris himself, and his teammate Darren Schloss. This was the guy who took issue with Matt before, wasn’t it? If this was a homophobia issue, then... well. It wouldn’t be all that surprising.
“Ah, Mr. Tucker,” said Greg, the liaison. “Greatly appreciate that you could make it down here so fast.”
“The Sports Illustrated office isn’t far,” Matt assured him, taking a seat beside Chris out of instinct. Chris didn’t look up, but Matt felt him shift a half-inch in Matt’s direction regardless. “How can I be of help?”
“We had an incident after training today,” Greg said, tone halting. “I’ll let Chris and Darren explain it to you, but... Chris asked that we bring you along. He said that you’ll be able to articulate what he means for us.” He paused. “Tensions are running high.”
“Yes, I thought so,” said Matt, getting comfortable in the chair. “Though I don’t know anything about it. All I know is that there’s been a fight of some sort.”
“Some fight,” said Darren, voice dark.
Chris sat up, throwing a rough look in Darren’s direction. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Just a couple of punches,” he clarified. “Nothing big.”
“A couple of punches would knock me flat on my back,” Matt reminded him, half-playful and half an admonishment. “I guess I can assume what this is about.”
He was met with silence, so Greg cut in after a few long seconds.
“Darren feels... misled,” said Greg, clearly trying to be diplomatic as well as polite. “Whereas Chris feels affronted at the implication he has been lying about his sexuality.”
Matt glanced between the two of them. “I’m not surprised Chris feels affronted,” he said eventually. He figured he’d best take his time, to make it at least seem like he had been thinking about it. “Darren, I’m fully aware you don’t think very highly of me, or of people like me. But you should know that this is a new thing for Chris. He didn’t find out about it much earlier than you did, in the grand scheme of things.”
“Well, that’s what you say,” said Darren, not even looking in his direction. “I think that’s horseshit, but you’re not going to admit it, so...”
“Darren,” warned Greg.
“What? I didn’t ask to bring him here. It’s him that needs a fucking supervisor, like he got called to the principal’s office as a kid. You feel better now your gay mom’s here to deal with it for you?”
“Watch your fucking mouth,” Chris barked back. Matt could feel the angry spark in the air – the hint that this fight might just re-ignite. He laid a hand on Chris’s shoulder, trying to keep him subdued. The last thing they needed was for this to get out of hand.
Again.
“We agreed that Mr. Tucker would be invited here to shed some light on this argument,” said Greg, glancing between the two players. Neither of them were facing front and center now. “He’s not here to supervise. He’s here to take the toxicity out of this and assist me in dealing with it – because frankly, I don’t know what to do with either of you.”
“And why would he?”
“Darren...” Greg warned again.
Matt shook his head. “It’s fine. I wouldn’t like an outsider coming in to cast judgment on me either. Not if I didn’t understand why. So let me explain why I think it is,” he said. Admittedly, he was deliberately using a condescending tone at Darren, but Matt figured he had at least earned that. Darren had spent the last however long trying to get a rise out of Chris, after all. Asshole. “Not only do I know the truth about how Chris first came to understand this part of himself – and your role in that process – but I also have some understanding of how people with your views often misunderstand my community. In fact, I’d say I have some expertise on the subject of homophobia in sport. So it seems reasonable to me that your team would trust my judgment.”
“First of all, you’re obviously biased,” said Darren. “Since you’re sucking his dick.”
Chris bristled. “If you don’t watch your fucking mouth-”
“Second?” Matt prompted firmly, cutting Chris off with another gentle hand on his arm. Not right now. Calm down.
“Second,” Darren said, pointing an accusatory finger at Matt. “I had fucking nothing to do with him being a faggot. Don’t you dare imply that.”
“I really need you to tone down your language,” said Greg. “Or it’ll be an immediate suspension. I’ve asked you several times now.”
Darren snorted. “You’re going to suspend me anyway.”
“Shouldn’t I?” said Greg. “I’m sorry, Mr. Tucker-”
“Matt,” he corrected. “Please.”
“Matt,” Greg continued. “I will let you finish what you’re saying. You’re right; we consider your input on homophobia in the sport to be very valuable. But I’m not expert – and Darren, even I feel offended by the basic facts here. You goaded and physically assaulted a member of your team on the basis of his sexuality. What do you expect me to do with that?”
“I expect you to suspend him too,” said Darren. “Since he hit back. And I expect you to find him different facilities to change and shower in for the future.”
“Oh, fuck you, Schloss.”
“You wish, Knoll.”
“Now both of you,” said Greg, raising his voice. “Simmer down. If I have to call our external security inside here to handle you, I will not be happy about it.”
“From my perspective,” said Matt, speaking as calmly as if nothing had just happened, “giving Chris separate facilities would be unethical – and, whether you feel that way or not, it would be very bad press.”
“I agree,” said Greg, rubbing a hand over his face beneath his glasses. Poor guy. Who knew how long they’d been going at it before Matt got here, with only Greg to hold down the fort? “That’s not feasible.”
“So just suspend him, then. And don’t expect me to go anywhere near him when I change.”
Matt jumped in before Chris could get beyond opening his mouth. “I sincerely doubt Chris wants to be anywhere near you either, Darren. For a start, he’s not attracted to you – and beyond that, would you want to be near an old friend that started treating you like this? You’re not going to be holding hands and singing Kumbayah.”
“I already caught him looking at me,” said Darren. “All the way through training.”
“Yeah,” said Chris. “I was watching you avoiding me. Slipping off to the exact opposite side of the room whenever I moved, no matter what you were doing. Figured you had some kind of fucking complex. Clearly I was right.”
“See?” said Darren. “He doesn’t even deny it.”
“He’s allowed to look at you, Darren,” said Greg. He sounded tired, and Matt wasn’t surprised.
“No, he’s not,” Darren insisted. “It’s perverted.”
“He wasn’t looking at you in a perverse way,” Greg continued. “Like he said. He thought it was strange that you were steering so clear of him. Making such a big deal of it. You guys used to be friends; I don’t think it’s unusual to make note of how much effort your friend is putting into ignoring you.”
“Just happens to be while I’m lifting weights.”
“Well, it was a gym,” Chris shot back, tone dry and sarcasm heavy.
“Anyway,” said Greg. “I think we can agree that in the future, Chris won’t be paying Darren too much close attention. I’m not making it a rule; I’m just saying that’s probably going to be the case.”
“You’re fucking biased, man.”
“I’m trying to handle the situation the best I can,” said Greg, watching Darren shake his head and avoid eye contact. “Now, I’d be interested to hear what Matt has to say on the topic of suspension.”
“Well. Darren isn’t wrong,” said Matt. “At least not about one thing. I am biased in Chris’s favor and personally offended by homophobia, so I’ll save us all the pointless exercise of giving my private opinion. What I will comment on is the optics.” He shifted back in his chair, not looking Chris’s way. If he was irritated that Matt wouldn’t stick up for him, then they could talk about it later; Matt didn’t want to see it right now. “If this story gets out – which it absolutely might – and Darren is not suspended, there’ll be a lot of questions about that. Questions which you’re going to find it hard to answer to the public’s satisfaction.”
“Bullshit,” said Darren, shaking his head.
Matt ignored him and continued. “The sports industry is one thing, but the public at large is moving strongly in a socially liberal direction. You’re only going to attract negativity by letting open homophobia go unpunished. I’m not saying he should be kicked off the team, but there should be some sanction.”
“And Chris?” Greg asked.
“You could make the argument that letting him stay without suspension is giving special treatment,” said Matt. “I’m sure somebody like Darren would make that argument. There may be some backlash from them if you don’t. However... I’d say the mass media, and the public at large, wouldn’t respond well to seeing a gay man suspended for defending himself in a situation like this. A situation that the club should not have allowed to happen in the first instance.”
“Well, we hold our hands up to that,” said Greg. “We were planning on some LGBT sensitivity training, but... clearly, the situation got ahead of us.”
“I think you’re right to move in that direction,” said Matt, largely ignoring the two athletes now. Chris was silent beside him, and Darren was behaving like a ticked-off teenager. “I don’t know how many of your team share Darren’s thinking, but... any of them who do aren’t going to take this very well. You’ll need to make it very clear from the offset that airing their grievances like this won’t be tolerated. Maybe advise them on how to act if they don’t like their teammate’s sexuality.”
“Which is what, in your book?” said Darren, voice dripping with sarcasm. “Kiss him on the lips and tell him you’re proud anyway?”
“Keep your distance without making a big deal out of it like some kind of hormonal teenage girl,” Matt corrected, giving him a thin smile. He didn’t relish the sexism in that statement – but he knew being referred to as a girl would bother someone like Darren, and that was his goal right now. “Behave exactly as you would if you didn’t like one of your teammates’ wives or girlfriends. It’s none of your business, and it doesn’t matter.”
“So how exactly did I turn him gay, then?” said Darren. “If it’s none of my business, and it doesn’t matter. You said it was something I did.”
“No,” Matt corrected. “I said you had a part to play in the process. You didn’t turn him gay. You made it harder for him to accept his sexuality when he first encountered it – which is something I’d like the Rangers to look out for, moving forward,” he said, turning back to Greg. “If there are any other LGBT teammates, then they need to know there’s support and understanding there for them. Not judgment.”
“Of course,” said Greg, nodding slowly. “We’ll work on that.”
“Coming to terms with your sexuality can be hard,” Matt continued. “The last thing you need clouding that process is a fear of the truth. People have to work through a lot of baggage by themselves, and making them think they’ll need to leave the sport they love is not something they need on top of that.”
He spared a glance at Chris. Was this what Chris had asked Matt here for? Was he expecting answers like these? When he looked, Chris wasn’t facing his direction – but he was nodding slightly in agreement.
He didn’t look mad at Matt. Actually, Matt felt more irritated with him for taking Darren’s bait in the first place. They’d have to talk about that later.
“Alright, then,” said Greg. “I’ll need to talk with upper management, but it sounds like we have a solution.”
“I’d like to suggest something else,” Matt said, slightly cutting in on Greg’s summary. “Since you’re not going to be suspending Chris, I suggest a short course in anger management instead.”
He could feel Chris look up beside him at that, but he kept his eyes pointed in Greg’s direction. Again – they could talk about it later.
“You think so?” said Greg.
“This probably won’t be the last time somebody confronts him with a bad attitude about his sexuality,” said Matt. “It won’t always be a teammate who won’t press charges. What if a member of the press tries to get a rise out of him? There’s plenty of homophobia there too; lots of sports writers are part of the big boys’ club. I think it’d be a good move for both Chris and the Rangers if that’s his consequence.”
Greg nodded slowly, taking notes. “Okay. That... makes sense. So. Exact terms are to be agreed, but... anger management for Chris. A suspension for Darren. Nobody presses charges. Nobody gives the story to the press – but if it does leak, then we’ll be upfront. Finally, this never happens again. Are we in agreement, gentlemen?”
Darren’s eyes were like fire.
But they were a fire that Matt felt proud to have tamed.
