53
As Long As It Takes
“You’re cheating!” Stacy stood up, reached over and bopped the middle brother, Damien, on the head. “You know good and damn well that wasn’t your book!”
“Watch your damn language!” Stacy’s mom shouted from the other room.
Everyone laughed.
“She’s just mad,” Damien told his brother, Brent, as he raked up the cards and shuffled for another hand of a family favorite, bid whist. “The only way she and Scully are going to see Boston is if they pack their bags and go with us!”
Damien and Brent high-fived.
Stacy rolled her eyes.
“Forget both you nuckas,” Scully mumbled.”
“Mama, Scully’s in here cursing,” Damien yelled.
“Stop lying, punk! I said forget!”
Their mother walked into the dining room with her hand on a slim hip. “I tell you, some things haven’t changed in twenty years. Am I going to have to break up this card game?” She placed a hand on Stacy’s shoulder. “Do you need some more girl power in this room?”
Stacy placed her hand on top of her mom’s. “I can handle these clowns.”
“Come on and sit down,” Scully said, rising from his chair. “I need to go check on the nieces and nephews.”
One of their cousins sat down and soon the trash-talking, and bantering across the table began again. Amid raucous laughter, Scully reentered the room. “Stacy, you have a visitor.”
Stacy’s brow furrowed. “Who?” Her answer walked into the room, carrying two dozen roses. She stood and faced him, indignation written across her face. “Tony, I told you that I didn’t want drama today. What are you doing here?”
“It’s on me, sis,” Brent said, rising. “He called me, asked if he could come over, and I said that it was okay.”
“Oh, so when did you start speaking for me and when did I stop being able to speak for myself?”
“Listen, I’m not trying to get in your business—”
“I can’t tell—”
“But I know that both of you are missing each other; both of you are hurting. I figured that since this is the day we’re being thankful and all, that we could call a truce for a minute.”
“I can’t believe you did this, Brent. You of all people. It was just a few short weeks ago that you were on the verge of getting arrested for assault!”
Brent fixed Tony with a determined look. “I’m still not far from it. If he ever puts his hands on you again, Tony knows how it’s going down.” He turned to Stacy. “But what you don’t know is that he also called two weeks ago and asked to meet with the family. Without you.” Stacy looked from Brent to Tony, with a confused expression. “He shared what had brought him to that awful place with you, and what he was doing to make sure it never happened again. He also wanted our forgiveness. I’m one of the ones who gave it to him.”
“I’ll only stay a few moments,” Tony said, the conversation now finally with him instead of about him. “But I wanted to see you, Stacy. And give you these.” He held out the roses.
Several seconds went by without her moving. Brent finally stepped forward. “Girl, are you going to just let the man’s arm fall off?”
Stacy took the flowers. “They’re lovely, Tony. Let me put them in some water.”
When Brent left the room, an awkward silence followed. Unlike Brent, Damien still had nothing to say to the man who’d dared put his hands on his sister. His and Scully’s was the forgiveness for which Tony was still waiting. “Time will tell,” was Damien’s answer when Tony insisted how sorry he was. Even now his fingers were itching to open up a can of whoop ass and use it on the man who hurt his sister. As for hotheaded Skully, he was only two seconds and about five feet away from let-me-handle-this-punk-ass-fool, so he again left the room.
He’d left, but Stacy didn’t trust Skully. He was likely to get to thinking about what happened and bum-rush a brother. “Let’s go outside,” she suggested, turning and leaving without waiting for a response. While walking to the sliding doors just off the dining room, she tried to sort out the myriad of feelings that seeing Tony had brought on.
“I didn’t mean to upset you,” Tony said, as soon as they were alone in the Gray’s backyard. “But you haven’t answered your phone all day. Or returned my calls.”
“Maybe that should have told you something,” Stacy quietly replied.
“I guess. But the last time we talked, you said that you weren’t going to close the door on us, that you were going to give me time to prove to you that what happened was a once-in-a-lifetime mistake.”
“I said that, Tony. And I meant it. But that doesn’t mean I want to talk to you on the regular, because I don’t. Yes, I’ve forgiven you, but I haven’t forgotten. I’m not going to fake the warm and fuzzy feelings when they are not there. I always said that if a man ever hit me, it would be one hit too many. And I’d be gone without looking back. Whatever you said to my brothers may have softened Brent’s position, but two of my brothers are still very angry. And, quite frankly, so am I.”
Tony took a deep breath. “There are no words for how sorry I am. If I could take back that night—”
“But you can’t....”
“But if I could, I would never, ever have put my hands on you. If I knew then what I know now, I never would have begun taking the steroids; and I would have listened when my supplier told me to back off.”
“Woulda, shoulda, coulda...”
“Doesn’t change a thing. I know.”
The two were quiet as they watched two yellow-rump warblers flit between the bird-of-paradise bush. One seemed to be chasing the other before both stopped and had a chirping conversation. Stacy imagined the one doing the most chirping was female because as soon as the other bird jumped on the same branch, the chirping bird took off again. Observing the birds’ shifting for closeness and distance, Stacy wondered whether or not she and Tony would ever again be on the same page.
“I know you’re trying,” Stacy said at last, her back to him as she continued to look for where the birds had gone. “The flowers are nice. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“So...” She finally turned around and looked at him. “Did you have a nice time with your family?”
“It was good, the usual. Mom asked about you. She’s still mad at me too.”
This elicited a slight smile from Stacy. She loved the feisty Mrs. Johnson, admired her courage in battling back from cancer. The day after the incident, she’d called Stacy and let her know in no uncertain terms that her son was one-thousand percent wrong, that she didn’t condone what he’d done, and that she would totally understand it if Stacy filed for divorce. After they’d talked for almost an hour, she’d also admitted that Tony had never been a violent man and that what had happened was totally out of character. Stacy had continued the relationship with his mother, even when she and Tony were not speaking.
“The family is thinking about going somewhere together for Christmas and New Years.... Maybe renting a large cabin in Big Bear or a house in Palm Springs.”
“That sounds nice.” For them, not Stacy. She hadn’t been to Big Bear since her debacle there with Bo and Darius. And she couldn’t remember the last time she’d been to Palm Springs.
“Do you know what you and little man are doing yet for Christmas?”
Stacy shook her head. “Haven’t even thought about it.”
“I probably don’t have to tell you what I’d like—for us to spend it together.”
“Tony—”
“I’m not looking for an answer today,” he said, putting his hands up in surrender. “I know I’m going to have to work hard to earn your trust, for you to let me back into your life.”
“You’re right. And I honestly don’t know how long it’s going to be before that happens. Besides, I’ve been in this game long enough to know what the deal is. It’s probably not like you’re hurting for company of the female persuasion.”
“Listen, Stacy.” He placed a hand on her arm. She didn’t flinch or pull away. “I’m not even looking at any other women right now. And I’m not being unfaithful. You’re my wife and you’re the one I want. Good things come to those who wait. You’re worth waiting for.”
Stacy looked in his eyes and saw honesty, sincerity, and vulnerability. In short, she saw the man that she married. Her heart flip-flopped, revealing the love for him that was still there, and the room to believe that their marriage could be saved. “You say that now. But how long do you think you can wait for me to get over what happened?”
Tony dared to take one step, and then another, and then there it was: Stacy wrapped in his arms. “I love you. I miss you. And I can’t see myself living without you. So I will wait as long as it takes.”