I stepped onto the bridge, dressed in my slave clothes and multicoloured cloak. I looked halfway decent and certainly better than in an oversized, grey ship suit. Alwin looked up as I entered. ‘Rae.’
I turned away without acknowledging him and sat in the other seat. He keyed the view screen shutter and it opened.
I sucked in a breath. The Saturn Space Station was huge. It must have had 200 levels, with protrusions and spires up and down its skin. Small pinpricks of light emitted from it and it glowed silver in the sunlight. So this was a Class Five Space Station. This is what drew people away from Outpost 311. This was the place I’d dreamt about. Although in my dreams my arrival was always grand, like Del Divlan’s promotional tour. With the press taking images and broadcasting them live. No, I was arriving like a fugitive without even decent clothes to wear. I began to fear that this family Alwin had found wouldn’t want me or perhaps it was a mistake and I wasn’t related to them at all. A nervous clenching worried my stomach.
As my gaze tracked along the skin of the space station, all of the hubs, ports and gantries merged into one. My heartbeat upped a notch, leaving me short of breath.
Our ship headed to the lowest level of the space station, or was it the top? I couldn’t tell because as we drew closer we could only see what was in front of us. Other ships were circling in, following the assigned holding pattern. We were inserted in the queue and when operations cleared us we headed for our allotted landing bay.
Alwin groaned loudly when the landing fee notice flashed up on his screen. Then I saw him wince as he authorised the transaction. His gaze slid in my direction but I turned away and stared at the console, trying to count the number of green lights. Perhaps being an auditor wasn’t so interesting after all if the pay was so low that a mere landing fee hurt.
I forgot my angry, nasty thoughts about Alwin because the approach to the landing bays was even more breath-stealing than the approach to the station. As I watched, things that were miniature grew larger, vagueness turned to detail. Some of the rivets in the outer skin looked as big as I was.
‘Rae,’ began Alwin, ‘can you power down the main drives for me. Centre panel, bottom row.’
‘Sure,’ I said, thawing a little. I’d just realised that I was going on a big adventure. There were more people on this space station that I’d ever seen in my whole life. I was going to see them all at the same time, not drawn out over the years of my life.
Alwin used the thrusters to nudge himself into the landing bay’s buffer field. There was a slight bump when it engaged and slid us into place.
He powered down the ship and launched out of his chair. ‘Give me five minutes, Rae. I need to clean up and I think a change of clothes is in order.’
I shrugged, feigning disinterest. Guiltily, I realised that I’d locked him out of his quarters and that he was probably itching to shower. There was a san unit off the bridge, he’d been able to use that at least.
Looking over my shoulder I saw him bouncing down the passageway. I tapped my fingers on the console while I waited to step into my dream world. My mind started weaving different futures for myself but they all came to nightmarish conclusions because of my failings. My parents were going to be disappointed in me, I just knew it. Hey, I was disappointed in me and Alwin… No need to even dwell on what he thought. I sighed to distract my tears. I had to think positively. I looked out toward the other landing bays. I could see small ships whizzing around a large freighter and also other ships that came to dock and gantries that were sliding along deep grooves in the skin of the station. That helped to pass the time and help me forget about my self-doubt.
When Alwin returned I tried not to stare. He wore a suit, not quite a ship suit, but something tailored. It was dark, with a white insert like a ‘V’ down the front. My eyes travelled down to take in the narrow leg of the suit and the fitted boots. He looked, well, great. Even better than Nel Wingham. And that was saying something. My mouth hung open for a bit and then I snapped it shut, deciding it was better to ignore him. There was no point in torturing myself over him after all.
‘Come on, let’s see some sights on the way to the Regency Grande. We’re a bit early so we have time.’
He keyed the hatch and stepped out. The gravity was very odd at first. It seemed to fluctuate. I already felt seedy so the uncertain footing didn’t help. I scrambled after him with a handful of robes clutched in my hand and found the gravity steadily increasing as we entered the corridor. I felt self-conscious but he didn’t comment about my outfit or my bad footing.
An official in a pale, blue uniform greeted us as we passed out of our landing bay. I stared at him until Alwin tugged my hand and drew me forward.
‘Don’t stare like that, Rae,’ he whispered to me.
‘Sorry. He’s the second-cleanest person I’ve ever met in my life.’
Alwin’s brows drew together and then he shrugged. ‘Let’s take the lift to the main promenade. We have time for a quick look at all the beautiful people before we meet with your parents.’
‘Sure, why not?’ My mind was everywhere at once. I didn’t think it was possible to contain such excitement. I was taking a stroll towards the rest of my life. What happened in the next few hours would change my life or destroy it. Alwin had made it clear that I couldn’t be part of his world. I’d never forgive him for what he had done to me. Him and his stupid audit and that kiss, of course. I flushed with embarrassment at the thought of it.
There were only a few people in the large corridor as we waited for the lift. The ceiling was rounded and easily three times my height. It was so clean too. Obviously there was no need to cut it down for scrap.
‘It’s so big,’ I said as I gaped again, unable to hide my wonder.
‘Yes,’ replied Alwin, a smile quirking his lips. ‘They drive huge conveyors along here.’
I blinked. I’d seen a conveyor on one of the documentaries on Lollydrop. I didn’t want to be standing in the corridor when one lumbered through.
The lift doors hissed open. It was already half full of humans and aliens. They didn’t even glance at us when we stepped in. Alwin stared at the lift door after telling the lift where we wanted to go. I did the same, if only to stop myself from gawping at everything and everyone. I couldn’t help letting my gaze wander. Everyone stared at the lift doors, like they didn’t care to notice anyone else. As each stop passed by, Alwin drew me out of the way, as people got out on their particular floors. More people flowed in and soon we were pressed up against the back wall of the lift. I noticed how everyone adjusted themselves so that there was an equal distance between the next person. The resulting spacing had an odd sort of symmetry to it.
I was very aware of Alwin, standing next to him. His hand flew around my waist as the wall behind us slid open. He prevented me from sprawling onto the floor of the main promenade. My gasp of surprise petered out when I took in the people, the shops, stalls, and glittering bits of hanging decorations. The noise of the people as they walked and talked washed over me and hurt my ears.
‘Oh god, I can’t do this!’ I began to shake, my stomach looped over itself. I turned to run.
‘Rae, what is it? Come back.’