I met a delightful young woman the other day and was amused to hear her stories about the blog she has started recently, which is really out there in every sense of the word.
Unfortunately, she had to change the name (it included a four-letter word which refers to an intimate part of a woman’s anatomy), since several organizations were banning it, and fire-walling her efforts was defeating the raison d’être behind launching the blog. She smartly switched the name to something far more innocuous-sounding.
But the content remained as in-your-face as ever. So, what was all the fuss about? As she put it succinctly: ‘Sex!’ Since she had decided to talk about her own sexuality in an entirely candid fashion, most of the responses had to do with talking dirty to her. As she put it: ‘Men wanted me to be still more explicit. And if I didn’t oblige, they’d shower a stream of filthy abuses.’ The debate that followed provided an insight into the so-called ‘new morality’ we keep discussing ad nauseum. True, women are far more open today when it comes to articulating their feelings vis-à-vis their bodies. But are men equally willing to hear these freed voices? Do old taboos still dominate our consciousness or have we relaxed rigid mores sufficiently to accommodate a woman’s desires – stated, secret or otherwise?
Blogging is about self expression. And freedom. It must be immensely gratifying to have one’s say sans any restrictions. Especially, in as repressed a society as ours. I believe a blogger has to be in constant communication with those who want a response. I really don’t know how an Aamir Khan or an Amitabh Bachchan does it, given their frenetic schedules, but the fact they are ‘contactable’ by ornery folks, is in itself a big move. Hollywood biggies hire professionals to keep updating their blogs. It is a full time job in itself. But here in India, celebs are expected to be in direct touch with fans who want to bond on their blogs.
What happens to those who do not get a response? Do they sulk? Accuse? Abuse? All three? I asked the attractive blogger how she dealt with the issue. How often did she write fresh stuff? Was it always about sex? She laughed and said she did explore other terrains as well, but mainly she discussed modern attitudes to dating. Drunken dates were high on her list of no-nos. However, as a single woman, she didn’t restrict her writing to just ranting about personal issues. As a concerned citizen she wanted her blog to address more serious problems confronting our society – child abuse, rape and sex crimes of all hues and definitions. Her blog was successfully reaching out to women in distress who were writing in with horrifying stories of marital violence, among other ghastly incidents that society often turns a blind eye to. And yes, she updated the material thrice a week.
Was the blog yet another cathartic/therapeutic self indulgence, or something much more? Is there a small but significant revolution taking place in the female domain, beyond the judgemental eyes of disapproving zealots? My newly acquired blogger-friend was pretty clear about her mission. She loved blogging, and she believed it served a definite social purpose. Through her frequent updates she not only succeeded in clearing the cobwebs in her own head, but also provided a liberal platform to men and women who wanted to share their thoughts on life, love and lust.
Her day job was more mundane, but kept her plugged into the here-and-now. Plus, it paid her bills. Her edgy defiance and strident assertions apart, I saw her as a representative of today’s ‘everywoman’. Slightly confused, but wanting more than ever to have her voice heard. If nobody else is willing to listen, that’s okay. She has her blog. And the blog is beginning to get an impressive number of hits. Some of them are yucky (‘Your blog sucks. Do you?’), others reassuring. She ain’t complaining. She is using her space to reach out, without having to bother about reactions. She is doing so bravely and boldly – not for her the anonymous route (strictly no names). ‘This is ME!’ she states simply. Take it or leave it. More and more fans are taking it … and begging for more.
Perhaps the blog’s growing popularity will give her the guts to go back to its original name. And just in case you are wondering what that four letter word is, let me just say it starts with a ‘c’, but it isn’t the one you are thinking about!
Go figure …