Terminal.
Worries about Seth, worries about college, everything paled in comparison to Wanda’s eight-letter diagnosis. The doctors gave her until June and said they would do everything in their power to postpone the inevitable. Wanda was ready to fight. She would always fight.
“Thought you were headed to Charlotte,” my mom said, glancing at me from the kitchen.
“Thought you were headed to the game,” I answered.
I paused in our living room and searched for my sunglasses. I had told Adam I would stop by the hospital on my way to the game, but it was too bright to make the trip without them.
“Have you seen my sunglasses?” I asked, staring at my mom as she straightened her bedazzled jersey. “I thought I left them in here.”
“Check your room.”
I found them beside my laptop, where my Alabama application was still visible on the screen. The application was halfway completed, and I felt like I was cheating on Auburn by even entertaining the idea.
“Claire!” my mom called from the kitchen. “You’ve got something in the mail!”
I slid the sunglasses over my hair and took the stairs two at a time. My mom was standing in the kitchen, leaning against the island.
“Something you want to tell me?” she said, smiling as she showed me a blue envelope.
I rushed across the floor, emotions swelling as I spotted the AU logo at the top. Welcome to the Family was written beneath the logo.
“I’ve been so busy, I haven’t even thought about checking my application,” I said, ripping the letter from inside.
Dear Claire,
Welcome to Auburn University!
“I got in,” I said, quiet at first. My eyes burned as I stared at my mom. Tears streamed down her cheeks. “I got in!” I repeated, louder. “Mom, I got in! I got in!”
She hugged me and we jumped up and down.
“I got in!” I said again, handing her the letter and pulling out the rest of the information.
“You got in,” she repeated.
I patted my pocket, searching for my phone. I had to tell my dad. I had to tell Case. Adam. Adam, I needed to tell in person. He would be excited for me, but I needed to do it face-to-face.
I hit the home button on my phone. A text was waiting.
Seth: I got in
Anxiety washed over me like waves on a sandcastle, pulling my excitement out to sea and leaving the remnants destroyed in the sand.
“You okay?” my mom asked, reaching for the rest of the information.
“Yeah,” I lied. I forced a smile and cleared the text. “Going to call Dad on my way to Charlotte. I’ll text you when I get there.”
“You telling your brother, too?”
“Yeah, after the game.”
She hugged me again, her arms tight around me like she didn’t want to let go. “You’re going to do great,” she said, her voice shaky. “I’m going to miss you, and I’m going to call you every day, but I’m so incredibly proud of you. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Backpack on my shoulder and sunglasses on my head, I stepped into the afternoon and stared at the azure sky. If fate was up there, taunting me, I needed it to switch to my side.
I drove to Charlotte, begging the universe to let Seth’s Auburn acceptance be a lie. Maybe this was his way of getting my attention? I shook my head, knowing that wasn’t the truth. Seth was a jerk, but he never slacked on his grades. If he wanted to get into Auburn, he could’ve.
Everything about this made my stomach churn. I had to tell Adam. Now there wasn’t any other choice.
Dusk shot a mix of colors across the sky and reflected off the hospital’s large glass windows. I pulled into a parking space at the front and texted Adam before turning off the car.
Claire: I’m here. Good luck tonight!
He’d be too preoccupied with the game to see the text until later, but it eased my guilt. I couldn’t remedy the Seth situation in an instant, but at least this way I felt like I was focusing on Adam.
I crammed the phone in my pocket and crossed through the cars. When I found Wanda’s room, the smell of bland soup hung in the air. I scrunched my nose as she waved me in.
“Tell me you brought contraband,” she said, letting the too-thin mixture drip off her spoon. I shook my head, and she frowned. “If I give you a dollar, would you run to the vending machine and sneak me a Snickers?”
“The doctor has your sugar intake limited, but I’ll check for trail mix.”
“You’re my favorite,” she answered. “Don’t tell Adam or I’ll deny it.”
She shifted against the pillows while I took a seat on the couch and glanced at the television. An old Western was on the screen. She turned it off and smiled.
“Tell me about the outside world,” she said. “Any juicy gossip?”
“No juicy gossip,” I said, “but I come bearing gifts.” I dug into my backpack and pulled out a small electronic. Wanda’s brow furrowed until I turned it around.
“My lands,” she whispered.
“Electronic Scrabble,” I said, leaning so she could take the gift. “Didn’t think they were still around, but I found one online. Figured it would be a good distraction for when Adam and I are at school.”
Wanda lowered her glasses so they sat on the tip of her nose. The machine beeped to life, and she grinned. “I feel like a child on Christmas morning. Thank you, dear.”
“You’re welcome.”
She fiddled with the game for a minute, and I looked at my phone.
“How’s school?” she asked.
“Long,” I answered. “We have semester exams in a few weeks, so all the teachers are trying to cram information before then. Most days I feel like banging my head on the desk. Otherwise, it’s not that bad.”
“Adam doing okay in school?”
“He’s doing okay in the class we share,” I replied. “Can’t speak for his other classes, but he seems like he’s caught up.”
“Good.” She blew out an exhale and relaxed into the pillows. “I worry about him and how this affects his school. Your dad is doing such a wonderful job helping him with football and scholarships, but none of it matters if he doesn’t keep those grades up.”
“I don’t think you have to worry about him,” I said. “Adam’s pretty set on playing college football. He wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize his chances.”
She nodded. “He was talking about Clemson and Alabama the other day, so I got the nurse to help me look them up. They looked like nice schools, but he said he’d bring me an information packet as soon as he picks. They still send those, don’t they, dear?”
“Depends on the school. Some send info, but others send instructions for how to find the information online.”
“Well, you’re a smart girl. Which would you pick?”
“Either is fine,” I said.
They weren’t the schools of my choice, but they were still good schools. If Adam was dead set on not going to Auburn, those were two football programs he’d do well in.
Goose bumps spread along my skin, brought by nerves and the frigid temperature of Wanda’s room. I raked a hand over my arm, seeing her brow tug together as she straightened in the bed.
“Are you two looking at the same schools?” she asked.
“Not exactly,” I said. “I’m going to Auburn.”
“That’s where you two went with your dad, right?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“And remind me, where was it?”
“Alabama.”
She paused, mischief clear behind her green eyes.
“He’ll pick the best school for him,” I said. “If that’s Alabama, great. If it’s Clemson, great. Who knows, he might stay in North Carolina and surprise us all.”
“Do you want him to go to Alabama?”
“It doesn’t matter, does it?”
There was a small knock on the door, and the doctor pushed it open. He glanced at Wanda, then me, then back. “Ready for respiratory therapy?” he asked, grabbing a plastic thing with a blue hose attached.
Wanda didn’t look thrilled. “Thought once was enough,” she said, scowling.
“Once was enough, three days ago,” he replied. “We upped your therapy to three times daily, remember?”
“I’m going on a food run,” I said, winking at her as I approached the door.
Wanda’s face softened momentarily, but hardened as she glared at the doctor again. I shut the door and stepped into the hall.
I found a vending machine near the lobby. Trail mix wasn’t an option, so I continued to the ground floor. The makeshift store near the cafeteria had a decent selection. I scanned the labels for the one with the least amount of sugar and headed to the register. My phone rang as the cashier scanned my stuff.
Seth.
I groaned and handed the worker a ten-dollar bill. I was cramming the change in my pocket when he called again.
My blood heated, and my hand clenched around the phone. We couldn’t do this forever, and he couldn’t take silence for a hint. I was done being patient.
“This has to stop,” I hissed into the phone, finding a chair as isolated as I could. “When I don’t answer you, it’s because I don’t want to talk to you! Leave me alone.”
“I miss you,” he said, his deep voice curling around the words in a way that used to make me swoon.
Not anymore.
I shook my head. “No, you don’t get the right to miss me. You broke up with me. Now you get to move on and enjoy your freedom. Remember?”
“I can’t move on,” he said, sighing. “I made a mistake, Claire. I want to fix this before it’s too late.”
“It is too late. I have a boyfriend, Seth. Go find someone and be happy.”
“You make me happy.”
“Then you shouldn’t have broken my heart.” Anger swept through me. “You should’ve tried long distance. You should’ve tried something!”
“I was stupid.”
“Yeah, you were.” I turned the bag of trail mix in my free hand. “Whatever we were … it’s in the past,” I said. “Please let it go and move on. I did.”
“Do you love him?”
I hesitated as adrenaline tingled through me. When I moved to Pader, Adam was the last thing I wanted. I hadn’t expected any of this, but that didn’t change how I felt.
“Do you love him?” Seth repeated.
“Yeah,” I answered. “I do.”
Seth started to reply, but I hung up the phone before his words were all the way out. I needed nothing more from him. I, Claire Collins, was in love with Adam Meade. For now, that’s all I needed.