I knew it wouldn’t be easy. I knew what I was getting into when I stalked her. When I pushed her into that spacious trunk of her car. I tried to prepare. To expect every contingency. But I didn’t see this coming. It’s as simple as that.
Lauren agreed to this. She agreed to let this happen to her. It is the sad truth. I don’t understand it. Or maybe I do. Maybe we all do. But what I don’t know is how far down the rabbit hole I’ve fallen.
“What do you know?”
“Jesus, Liam. I know everything. What are you talking about?”
She’s so sure of herself. I can tell Lauren is used to being in charge. Particularly when it comes to men. She thinks she’s calling the shots. That my brother delegated this to her.
“What, exactly?” I ask.
She pauses before answering. I stand a good ten feet away from her, unmoving, like she has suddenly come down with some awful and contagious disease. At the same time, she watches me like a rabbit might watch a dog. She knows she’s faster, smarter, but she can’t ignore the inherent risk of being this close to me.
“Call your brother if you need to,” she says. “I don’t care. Just let me out of this tape. It hurts.”
“No,” I say without thinking. Of course I am not going to let her out of the tape. Not yet.
She looks around the cabin again. The motion transforms her, sheds years from her age. Like she is looking for someone. Like her parent might suddenly appear to hold her hand and tell her what to do. As I think this, I feel a new sensation. Empathy, I think. Then she looks at the tarp again and I remember just how serious this all is.
“It’s a stunt,” she says, the pitch of her voice rising. “We’re just supposed to lay low for a couple of days. Then he’ll find me. He’ll be the hero. I get not going to the trailer. That makes sense. It does.”
A stunt? Is that what he told her? It is certainly not what he told me. Far from it.
“He didn’t tell me that you’d know,” I say.
“He didn’t?” she asks. I can see her brain spinning around, faster and faster. “That makes sense, too. We talked about it. It has to look real. If it goes wrong, everything goes to shit. For everyone.”
“Yeah,” I say.
I move closer to her. I can sense her questions coming, ones I won’t be able to answer.
“So you and Drew have talked about it?”
She snorts. “Of course. Come on, take the tape off. I’m obviously not going anywhere.”
“And you were okay with this?” I ask.
Her head tilts. The aura of superiority returns.
“Really.” She laughs. “I always thought of you as the tough guy. But you’re nervous, aren’t you?”
All I can do is stare back at her. She has no idea what she’s gotten herself into.
“You need to drink,” I say.
I grab the water off the floor and twist the cap. Moving closer, I reach out with it.
“If you take the fucking tape off, I can do that myself,” she says.
Her use of the F word bugs me. I’m not sure why. But I have so much I need to do. So many steps before it’s all done. I check my watch. The event starts in less than an hour. I’m not changing the plan. That’s not going to happen. I won’t let it. We need to go.
“Listen to me,” I say firmly. She flinches and my voice softens despite myself. “We’re leaving. You need to stay calm and quiet. Do you understand?”
“What? Where? To the trailer?”
“Not yet,” I say.
“But . . . Liam, we can’t get caught. Not now. You understand that, right?” she asks, as if speaking to a three-year-old.
I shake my head, annoyed. “We won’t. Everything is under control.”
She looks around the cabin, her eyes lingering on the tarp. “I doubt that.”
I could hit her. I could slam my fist into her perfect face and watch her glasses break into jagged little pieces. But I won’t. She underestimates me. And until I fully understand this new wrinkle in the plan, maybe that’s a good thing.
I’m not sure what I’m doing when I reach around behind my back. I slip my fingers around the grip of the pistol and ease it out from under my waistband. When I bring it around, when she sees it, everything changes. I see the fear again, and uncertainty. For the first time, she looks as if she might try to escape. So I turn the barrel in her direction.
“Maybe you think you know me. Maybe you have some ideas. But the truth is, it doesn’t matter. I don’t care. About you. About anything. So, before you think of doing anything cute, remember this. I’ll put a bullet in myself as quickly as I’ll put a bullet in you.”
My words are like something physical. They change her, syphoning the glimmer of arrogance from her eyes, draining the blood from her face. But she nods.
“Good,” I say.
I slip the gun back into my pants and help Lauren to her feet. We move to the door. Once on the decking, I glance one last time at the mound in the corner, then lock the door behind me, checking it twice to make sure it is secure.