Chapter 8
Lifestyle Strategies
Earlier I covered some of the important aspects of how sleep, exercise, and stress can impact your hormones and your overall health. I discussed how too much stress and cortisol contribute to belly fat, hormonal imbalances, sleep disorders, and metabolic syndrome, and about how sleep deprivation can lead to weight gain, inflammation, and chronic illness. I also illustrated the importance of an active lifestyle and exercising to keep our mobility as we age, and to help protect us from diseases like cancer and coronary heart disease. I also included information on all the positive attributes of engaging in physical activities such as, improved mood, sleep, and insulin sensitivity.
Now, I’d like to touch on the topic of telomeres including, what they are, and how they relate to your health, longevity, and lifestyle.
Telomeres are the protective caps on the ends of our chromosomes, they have often been compared with the plastic tips on shoelaces, because they keep chromosome ends from fraying and sticking to each other.
Telomeres shorten a little bit each time a cell divides, and get shorter as we age. The length of our telomeres can affect both our health and our longevity. People with shorter telomeres age more rapidly and are more prone to diseases like: cancer, coronary heart disease, heart failure, diabetes, and osteoporosis. Having shorter telomeres has also been associated with having a shorter lifespan. There are many factors outside of normal aging which can prematurely shorten our telomeres. These include smoking, obesity, pollution, exposure to toxins, stress, and sleep deprivation.
Elizabeth H. Blackburn is a Nobel Laureate and Morris Hertzstein Professor of Biology and Physiology, in the Department of Biochemistry and Biophysics at the University of California San Francisco. She is a leader in the area of telomere research, and it was she, who discovered the molecular nature of telomeres.
In a 2015 study, which was published in the journal Molecular Psychiatry. Elizabeth H. Blackburn and a group of other esteemed researchers studied 239 healthy, non-smoking, post-menopausal women for one year. The study was developed to examine the effects that stress and stressful major life events would have on the length of the women’s telomeres, and to see if lifestyle patterns played any role in the outcome. Major stressors in this study included: the death of a close friend or family member, extreme stress in the work place, loss of employment, financial burdens, being a caregiver, and troubled relationships. All things that most of us have experienced at one time or another. What they found was that major stressors over the year, significantly predicted accelerated telomere shortening over the same time period. In other words, too much stress might not give you gray hairs, but it can prematurely speed up the aging process.
Notably, they also found that women who maintained healthy lifestyles (a combination of eating a nutritious diet, getting enough sleep, and exercising,) had no telomere shortening when exposed to the same types of adverse life events. This proves once again, that our lifestyles can either be the predictors of illness, or of wellbeing.
The exciting news is that we can protect ourselves from early aging. We have the power to impact our hormones, our micro biome, and our genes.
How to Get Moving
Exercise. Many people groan inwardly just seeing or hearing the word because they think that for it to be effective, exercise has to be torture.
Additionally, to someone who’s never been active before, the idea of exercise can be very intimidating. There can be uncertainty about how to begin, ability to participate, and how to be effective. I know a lot of people also equate exercising to joining a gym, and that’s okay if going to a gym is something that you enjoy, but you don’t have to join a gym to be healthy. The most important thing is that being active should be fun. It doesn’t have to be torture, and it shouldn’t be. How could anyone stick to doing an activity they hated?
You don’t have to start big either. You can start by making a few small changes, and work your way up to being more active at your body’s own pace. Here are some examples of things that you can do to get started:
» Park a little further from work, school, or the store
» Choose to take the stairs when you can
» Get up from your desk to walk around every hour or so
» Go for a walk on your lunch break
» Bike or walk to places whenever you can
» When you’re at home find reasons to go up and down the stairs, or to walk from room to room
» Go for long walks after dinner with your favorite person
When I first began my own personal journey to better health, I bought a bicycle and a helmet, so that I could go for bike rides, and I bought an instructional DVD so I could learn to belly dance. I got moving in my own way, on my own terms, and I had fun doing it. You can too!
While we’re on the topic, DVD’s are a great resource. There’s an abundance of different DVD’s available, with professional trainers who’ll guide you through an activity such as: dance, yoga, martial arts, weight training, or cardio. It’s a no pressure way to becoming more active because you can work out in the privacy of your own home, at your own pace. You don’t have to drive anywhere, and you can fit the activity into your own schedule, instead of rushing to keep an appointment. For many people, this is a great solution. I’m a certified personal trainer, capable of creating my own workouts, but I use DVD’s all the time. I enjoy the convenience, the variety of activities available, and the personalities of the trainers. For me it can be more fun, and more motivating than working out on my own.
You need to be active for at least 30 minutes a day, 5-6 days a week, but fitting more movement into your life doesn’t need to be hard core or extreme.
Here are a few more ideas to help you find an activity that’s right for you. How about bike riding in the park, or dancing to your favorite tunes in your living room? What about taking a dance class, or a karate class, or joining a softball team? Maybe you like bowling, or have always wanted to learn to play tennis? Skiing, roller skating, canoeing, swimming, the possibilities are endless. Try something new, or perhaps rediscover an activity that you used to love. Getting your exercise can be a totally positive experience. Now is the time for you to find fun activities, and to enjoy your life!
Getting Enough Sleep, the More You Know…
It’s fascinating to think about how all the key components of health: diet, sleep, exercise, and stress management, are all so interdependent on each other. For example, getting enough sleep at night helps us to better cope with stress during the day. Improved stress management helps us focus better and sleep better. Regular exercise during the day improves the quality of our sleep. Lack of sleep seems to cause increased hunger, especially for high calorie foods, and interestingly, what we eat may also affect how well we sleep!
In a 2016 study, published in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine, researchers studied 26 healthy adults to see if diet could impact sleep. They compared the sleep patterns of participants on a controlled high fiber diet, to the sleep patterns of the same participants when food choice was unrestricted. The results? When the participants ate a high fiber diet they slept better and more deeply, with less sleep disturbances. Conversely, when the participants consumed a low fiber - high sugar diet, they experienced a lest restful sleep, with more sleep disturbances.
Amazingly, the food we choose to eat can even affect the quality of our sleep! Many other things can too. Things like stress, our busy schedules, caffeine intake, and even our technology, can all interfere with our getting a good night’s rest. More than one third of Americans don’t get enough sleep, and when you think about how it all connects, getting enough sleep is one of the cornerstones of good health. Everyone is different, some people need a little less sleep than others, but on average most people require between 7 and 10 hours of sleep a night.
Here are some ideas to help you develop better sleep patterns:
1. Turn your bedroom into a peaceful oasis meant for sleep.
Keep your room dark, and cool. Remove all electronics from your room. Devices like televisions, phones, computers, and printers can all be too stimulating to allow you to relax, and the lights from these devices interfere with your sleep hormones. Make sure your bed and pillows are comfortable and that the room is well ventilated.
2. Set a regular sleep schedule.
Try to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, even on weekends. Getting up at the same time every morning is the key, so try not to sleep in.
3. Try not to take naps.
Daytime naps can interfere with your nighttime sleep. If you do nap, try to make it before 3pm and nap for less than one hour.
4. Create a bedtime routine.
Those of us who are parents know how important a set bedtime with a quite bedtime routine is for getting small children to bed at night. The same rules apply to adults, maybe even more so. After our hectic, stressful, and hurried days, we need some down time to unwind and relax before bed if we want any chance at getting a peaceful night’s sleep. Take an hour or two before bedtime each night to engage in some quite relaxing activities such as: reading, listening to some quite music, taking a warm bath, meditating, stretching, or practicing some relaxation yoga. Dim the lights to set a more sleep inducing atmosphere.
5. Try not to deal with anything too stressful or upsetting right before bed.
Strong negative emotions will keep you awake at night. You need to feel calm and relaxed to sleep.
6. Take notes or make a list for tomorrow.
In the evening, before you’re too tired, write down everything that you want to remember for the next day. Keep this list near your bed, somewhere that you’ll see it in the morning. By keeping it close by, you can add to it if you suddenly think of something else. When you’re done you’ll be better able to sleep because you won’t be up all night, worrying about the things you must take care of tomorrow.
7. Don’t keep looking at the time.
Once you’re in bed don’t play the how many hours’ game. You know the one, if I fall asleep right now I’ll get 6 hours, 4 hours, 3 hours… This just stresses you out, which can ruin your chances of getting any rest.
8. Limit your caffeine.
If you’re having difficulty sleeping it could be that you’re over caffeinated. Limit your caffeine intake and don’t have any caffeine late in the afternoon.
9. Don’t drink alcohol to help you sleep.
Although alcohol may initially make you feel drowsy, it will interfere with and disrupt your sleep.
10. Exercise regularly, but not too close to bed time.
People who exercise sleep better, but exercising too late in the day can be too rousing. Remember you want to be relaxed, not invigorated before bed.
11. Don’t eat a big meal too close to bedtime.
A big meal before bed will just make you uncomfortable and could interfere with your sleep. If you feel hungry before bed, have a small snack to satisfy your hunger.
12. Don’t drink too much liquid an hour before bed.
Don’t go to bed thirsty, but try not to drink too much right before bed. You don’t want your sleep to be interrupted by added trips to the bathroom in the middle of the night.
13. Do keep some water near the bedside.
It’s nice to have some fresh water handy for sipping if you should wake up with a dry throat or mouth, in the middle of the night.
14. Don’t struggle.
Staying in bed when you can’t sleep will only frustrate you and further prevent you from getting to sleep. If after 20 minutes or so you find that you can’t fall asleep, get out of bed and go do something quite in another room. Although you may be tempted, do not use the time to catch up on work or your bills. You could become too awake and possibly too stressed, to get back in bed. Instead choose relaxing activities like reading, or listening to soft music.
15. Make the most out of the daylight.
Our bodies sleep patterns, are regulated by daylight. When you wake up in the morning open all the drapes and let the sun in. Get outside if you’re able, and if it’s dark when you arise, turn on all the lights.
Sleep Apnea
If you snore loudly, awaken feeling unrested after a good night’s sleep, awaken with a bad head ache, or a dry throat, you may have sleep apnea. Sleep apnea is a condition where breathing stops briefly during the night, sometimes several times during a night. Talk to your doctor if you think you have sleep apnea. Sleep apnea is a potentially dangerous condition which can lead to high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, and non-alcoholic liver fatty liver disease. It also can increase the risks for stroke and sudden death.
Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS)
RLS is a neurological disorder which causes your legs to jerk or move at night. People who have RLS have an overwhelming urge to move or kick their legs, due to uncomfortable or painful sensations in their legs. The symptoms typically get worse at night when they are trying to relax or sleep.
Periodic Limb Disorder
Periodic limb disorder is a neurological disorder which causes a person’s legs jump and twitch involuntarily every 20 to 40 seconds while they sleep.
There’s an array of other medical conditions which can also interfere with your sleep such as: seasonal allergies, CODP, and depression. If you think you have a medical condition which is affecting your ability to sleep talk to your doctor.
Taking a Load Off
Most of us are living our lives under some sort of daily pressure. Whether it be problems at work, financial burdens, health issues, or just the stresses of everyday living; we all have things which happen in our lives that can make us feel worried, or cause us to feel stressed. This burden is not only a mental burden, but a physical one, which affects our bodies. Think about it, when we are stressed we get neck aches, stomach aches, and headaches. During a stressful encounter, our hearts can race and pound. Continual stress can also raise cortisol levels (which as mentioned previously causes inflammation,) the storage of belly fat, and can lead to a host of other health problems. Spending each day in a constant state of stress is like walking around with a crushing weight on your head and your shoulders all the time. How could anyone sleep, eat, enjoy relationships, or love their lives under such constant weight and pressure?
The answer lies in learning to take a load off. Not off your feet, but off your mind. Learning ways to better cope with unavoidable stress, to release or relieve stress, and to rid yourself of unnecessary stress, are how you take the load off.
Sleep
I’ve already covered the importance of good sleep, and daily exercise so I’ll just lightly touch on these two topics regarding how they can reduce your stress.
You’ve probably heard the expressions “everything will look better in the morning” and “let me sleep on it.” That’s because a good night’s sleep really does put everything into perspective. Problems somehow loom larger than life, and things are harder to deal with when we are sleep deprived. Getting a good night’s sleep is not only physically restorative, it’s mentally restorative too. When we get enough sleep we are better able to make decisions, learn new stuff, remember things, and handle problems.
Exercise
Exercising creates endorphins, and endorphins make you happy. Endorphins are small chemical communicators produced by the body to alleviate pain. They also create feelings of euphoria and relaxation. That’s why people feel happier after a good workout. Exercise also improves your blood flow, and helps bring more oxygen to your brain. Working out is a great way to blow off steam, relieve pent up stress, improve your focus, your mood, and help you to sleep better at night.
Yoga
Yoga, a form of exercise which has been around for about 5000 years, can be another great way to re-center yourself and relieve stress. The practice of yoga combines controlled breathing, strength, balance, and flexibility, with focus & serenity. The combination of physical activity and tranquility, really delivers when it comes to creating positive results. Practicing yoga can: lower your blood pressure, lessen anxiety, reduce depression, and diminish pain. Bonus benefits include: better balance and functionality in daily activities, increased muscle tone, improved range of motion, enhanced athletic performance, and a sense of well-being.
Meditation
You don’t have to climb to the peak of the Himalayans, or become a Buddhist monk, to enjoy the inner peace that comes from practicing meditation.
Here’s why you should try it. Meditation is one of the most powerful ways to elicit something known as “the relaxation response.” The relaxation response is a physiological state of calmness, produced using relaxation techniques. There have been many benefits associated with creating this state of calmness. Regular meditation has been connected with: improved sleep, lower stress levels, better coping skills during stressful situations, a general feeling of wellbeing, improved brain function and focus, and a stronger immune system.
Additionally, meditation can have a positive effect on many health conditions which are often adversely affected by stress, such as: anxiety disorders, depression, high blood pressure, pain, asthma, acid reflux disease, and heart disease.
Keeping all of that in mind, here are seven easy steps to help you learn to meditate. Even if you don’t do it regularly, these steps will help you to relax if you’ve had a very stressful day.
1. Set a low volume timer for 10 – 20 minutes.
2. Pick a word or phrase to repeat. This will be your mantra. It can be anything that makes you feel good, like “ocean breeze,” “today is a good day,” “happy,” etc.
3. Sit in a quiet spot, in a comfortable position, with your eyes closed.
4. Relax all your muscles.
5. Breathe slowly and naturally. As you exhale, repeat your mantra silently to yourself. If other thoughts drift into your mind, it’s okay. Just gently return to your mantra.
6. After the 10 – 20 minutes have passed, sit quietly for another minute or two and allow your thoughts to return.
7. Open your eyes and sit for another minute before rising, and resuming your regular activities.
There’s also a variety of other meditation techniques that you can try. Single point or concentrative meditation, involves spending 10-20 minutes or more, focused on one object, sound, or image. You can focus on things like: a favorite photograph, a piece of art, soothing music, logs burning in a fire place, or a flower in the garden. It’s normal for your mind to occasionally wander. If it does, just gently bring your focus back to your chosen object.
Another meditation technique which can be very affective, is guided meditation. In guided meditation, another person leads you through the meditation from beginning to end. Often such guided meditations are available as recordings, that you can listen to at home. If you think you’d enjoy trying some guided meditation, the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research center, and the Chopra Center, both offer some free voice guided meditations on their websites, http://marc.ucla.edu/ & http://www.chopra.com/articles/guided-meditations. You can also find many other sources for guided meditations like these, on the internet.
Relaxation Yoga
Relaxation yoga is a series of gentle stretches meant to ease sore muscles and help calm your mind. Many people practice relaxation yoga before going to bed as part of their regular bedtime routine. You can listen to soft music while you move through the poses and you can even do some of the stretches right in your bed. Relaxation yoga is different than other forms of yoga. It isn’t strenuous, and nearly anyone can participate. For a free demonstration please visit, http://healthybodyconnection.com/relaxation-yoga/
Get in Touch with Your Surroundings
Whether it’s a bare foot walk along the shore, or threw a grassy field, a walk through the woods on a fall day or just sitting enjoying the day for a few minutes in your own back yard, getting out into nature can be an excellent way to relieve your stress.
It might seem a little hokey, but it works. The trick is to use your time in nature to connect with your surroundings. Concentrate on the sights, sounds, smells, and sensations. Do you feel the sun on your face, or the breeze as it stirs around your skin? Can you feel the warm sand or soft grass beneath your feet? Do you hear birds calling in the trees, or the leaves crunching under your boots? Can you hear children laughing at play? Can you smell the sweetness of flowers in the wind? To notice the sights, sounds, and smells around you, you have to slow down enough to focus on them. This kind of open awareness, is actually another form of meditation, in which you are fully present and aware of all that is happening around you.
When I lived closer to the shore, I would often visit the beach. It was a small local beach which never had massive crowds of people on it. I would find myself a quiet spot to just sit and enjoy my surroundings. I’d watch the waves drift to the shore, and the seagulls as they flew, circled, and landed. I was aware of the other people on the beach like the children playing nearby, and the couples who were strolling on the shoreline. I could smell the salty ocean air. I could hear the cry of the gulls, the sound of the surf, and the laughter of the children. I can still remember clearly how the sun and breeze felt on my skin, and the feeling of the sand between my toes. I would instinctually go there whenever I needed some serenity and clarity. I would just sit there taking it all in. When I was ready to leave, I left feeling happy, serene, and rejuvenated.
I don’t live near the ocean anymore, but I still practice this form of open awareness. Sometimes I go for a long walk. Sometimes I just sit in my yard enjoying the sun and the air. There is a true magic in noticing and appreciating the beauty of the world around you. It grounds you, and somehow at the same time it lifts you up.
Do That Thing You Love Doing
Is there something that you love doing, that just feels natural and makes you happy?
What I’m talking about is that thing that you were born to do, that thing which fills you up inside. I like to call it your inner music, because it’s like a beautiful song in your soul that needs to be expressed.
Almost anything can be the source of that inner music, from mountain climbing, to playing an instrument, from teaching, to quenching a thirst to learn. For some it could be the desire to create, to draw, cook, garden, or sculpt. For others, the music might be sharing their message, their truth, or their vision with others. The possibilities are unlimited, and it’s something different for each of us. Whatever it is for you, it’s important that you to make time in your life for it. Climb that mountain, write that book, reconnect with your creativity, open that dream business, or share your vision with the world.
Many of us put our own happiness on hold for someday, because we are just too busy or too bogged down by obligations today. The problem is that somehow, someday never arrives. By stifling your passions, you are editing yourself and denying the part of you that most makes you, you. You can’t be truly happy, when you aren’t being true to yourself. Don’t stifle that special music within you. Follow your passions and live your best life today, tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
“Don’t die with your music still in you”
- Dr. Wayne W. Dyer.
Don’t Worry Needlessly
Happiness is the opposite of stress, and if you’re worried you’re not happy.
I always used to joke that I was born with the worry gene. I used to say that I inherited it from my grandmother. I adored my grandmother, she was kind, gentle, and loving, but she was a terrible worrier. I remember how when I was eight years old, she’d never let me go in more than a half inch of water when we’d visit the beach together. She’d keep a strong grip on my wrist, sure that I’d be swept out to sea by an undercurrent at any moment. I also remember how she’d nervously watch me, afraid that I’d fall and break both my legs, whenever she caught me walking along the foot-high brick borders which edged the trees and flower beds just outside of her apartment building. Her heart was in the right place I know, but she suffered needlessly from all of that worrying.
I might have actually inherited that gene, if there is such a thing. As I grew into an adult I found myself becoming increasingly fearful myself. I began to sweat the big stuff and the little stuff too. All that fear, and gut churning worrying was ruining my life. I spent years drowning in all that self-created misery. In time, I was fortunate enough to recognize what all that stress was doing to my life, my happiness, and my health. Intuitively, I began to make changes. Realizing that I had denied my true self for too long, I ended a stressful, and unfulfilling career path. I chose to take back my power, and to pursue my dreams. I started to learn that I didn’t have to sweat so much of the small stuff.
Dr. Wayne Dyer was an internationally renowned author and motivational speaker. Often called the father of motivation, his passion was to help others through teaching the principles of self-discovery and personal growth. He authored over forty books, including twenty-one New York Times best-sellers. He sadly passed away in 2015 at the age of 75.
Some of the best lessons that I have learned about obtaining happiness and peace, I have learned by listening to the wisdom of Dr. Dyer. He once said that there are no good reasons to worry. He explained that there are only two kinds of situations, the ones we have control over and the ones we don’t.
Why should we worry about the things which we have control over? We control the situation, so why worry? Why worry about the things we have no control over? Worrying won’t help. Worrying never improves a situation, it just adds stress to it.
Are there some situations, in which our fears or worries are justified? Of course, there are! But, outside of those truly serious occasions, Dr. Dyer makes a valid point. Why spend your time and energy worrying about the small stuff? Making yourself miserable and sick, or losing sleep, isn’t going to help in anyway.
When I start to feel stressed out, I try to remember to ask myself if what I’m worried about will affect my life, and my future in the big picture? Will what I’m worried about even matter in five years? If it won’t matter in five years, then chances are it probably isn’t something worth worrying about today.
Focusing on the Positive
Have you ever heard of a self-fulfilling prophesy? A self-fulling prophecy is when something happens because we expect it to. In life perception is reality. In other words, the way we think about our lives, has a powerful impact on the quality of our lives. Our perspective is everything.
By placing our focus on the things which we view as being wrong in our lives, we are unconsciously narrowing our perspective, closing ourselves off from happiness, and promoting our own bad experiences. Negative thoughts about ourselves, our situations, or our relationships, tend to spiral downward. As we repeatedly replay these kinds of destructive thoughts in our minds, we become fixed on them and our lives dissolve into a constant state of turmoil, and stress. Every aspect of life becomes tainted. Work, personal relationships, and our health all suffer.
Fortunately, this doesn’t have to be the case. Positive thoughts are equally powerful. By consciously choosing to appreciate, enjoy, and be grateful for all that is good in our lives, we can widen the scope of our attention, and multiply our good experiences. When we do that, we become open to the possibilities, we begin to see and appreciate the kindness of others, and we’re able to embrace life with a sense of optimism and well-being. This is called being mindful. When we look at the world through this lens, our relationships deepen, we experience more beauty in the world, we become aware of what truly matters in life, we are more kind to ourselves and to others, and good things begin to flow into our lives.
One easy and effective way to help you become more mindful, is to keep a gratitude journal. While this might sound a bit out-there, numerous studies have been done on the effects of positive emotions like gratitude. Researchers have found that gratitude is strongly correlated to, and is an indication of wellbeing. Gratitude has been shown to: improve sleep, improve immune function, benefit the cardiovascular system, lower cortisol in response to stress, reduce the risk of stroke, and to shorten and lesson episodes of depression.
In 2003, the American Psychological Association published the findings from a large research project on gratitude and thankfulness. The project which consisted of three different studies, was conducted by two of the most well-respected experts in the field of phycology, Dr. Robert A. Emmons, and Dr. Michael E. McCullough. Doctors Emmons & McCullough, found that people who kept a gratitude journal were more likely to achieve their goals, felt more optimistic and enthusiastic, and were more likely to help others. One of the studies included a group of people with neuromuscular disease. This group reported: increased levels of energy, better sleep, and feeling more connected to others, after only 21 days of gratitude intervention.
In 2015, a study led by Professor Alex Wood Ph.D. and Dr. Deepak Chopra was also published in the American Psychological Association. The study focused on the effects of gratitude on 186 men and women with asymptomatic Heart Failure. This study found that not only was gratitude associated with: better sleep, less depressed mood, and less fatigue, it was also associated with better self-efficacy, and lower inflammatory biomarkers.
Keeping a gratitude journal takes about 5 minutes out of your day, and will provide you with scientifically proven benefits. Imagine that something as basic as how you view your life, can improve your sleep, your energy, your sense of wellbeing, and can even lower the inflammatory biomarkers in your body!
Here’s how to keep a gratitude journal.
1. During the day make a point of noticing the things which make you feel good, appreciative, happy, or that just make you smile.
2. In the evening, find a quite spot where you can sit down and reflect on your day.
3. Write down a few things from your day that you are grateful for. There are no rules as to what you can feel grateful for or as to what you can write down. It can be anything from I am grateful for the sunny weather to I am grateful that my father pulled through his surgery today.
4. Instead of trying to come up with a laundry list of items, take the time to explore and appreciate 2-3 special happenings or people who touched your life in a good way today. Reflect on how they made you feel, why it was special.
5. You can do this exercise every night, 2-3 nights a week, or even just once a week, whichever way works best to you. If you like, keeping your gratitude journal can even become part of your regular bedtime routine.
Take Five
In today’s busy world we are often running, rushing, and under the gun, from early in the morning till we fall into bed at night. Is it any wonder that we can’t sleep and we can’t seem to relax? To de-stress, we must take breaks from all that hectic craziness. Whether it’s in the form of an afternoon walk on your lunch break, taking some time to curl up with a great book and a cup of tea in the evening, meditating, or taking some time to pamper yourself, everyone needs and deserves a little down time to relax and unwind.
Friends, Family, and Community
You’ve probably heard the saying “it takes a village to raise a child.” In part that saying might have evolved from the fact that we need each other, and we’re not meant to go it alone. We all need to be part of something bigger than ourselves. We need a community to belong to. In many cultures, though out history, being exiled from your community was the worst possible of punishments because, nothing is as important to our emotional well-being as love, friendship, and community. We all have a need to connect, to be accepted, to be loved.
Today, we create community thorough our loved ones, friends, families, neighbors, religious groups, social groups, and by volunteering. Family game night, date night with your spouse, family gatherings, and going out with your friends is more important than you may have realized. Taking some time to connect with others is a vital part of having a happy, less stressed lifestyle. Personal interactions add meaning, and pleasure to your life. Laughing together with people you care about is good for you, and it’s good for them too! It’s part of that all-important down time, and it helps create the balance that we all crave, and need.
Our communities not only offer us acceptance and love: they offer us support and understanding. It’s good to remember that we’re not alone, when we’re facing challenges, and it’s so rewarding to share good news with someone who’s cheering for your success. Make time to spend with those important people in your life. Your life and theirs will be better for it.
Here’s a bonus tip, hug someone you love. I know for me; nothing takes the edge off a stressful day better than a tight hug from my husband. Hugging and cuddling lowers cortisol levels, blood pressure, and reduces stress. One study even found that people who receive more hugs are better protected against catching a cold.