I Will Make You Love Me

An Extreme Tale of

Sex, Lies, & Duct Tape

Megan Weber reluctantly opened her mouth and let him put it in. There was no use refusing or trying to get away. Her hands were bound together with multiple layers of thick duct tape behind her back. He had forced her to her knees and his grip on her long, black hair would only tighten if she struggled. Within seconds, the long shaft was sliding in and out between her pouty but unwilling lips.

 

“Suck it. Suck it like you used to.”

 

She looked up and met Nick’s eyes. She could barely see them through his shaggy, brown hair. He normally kept his hair professionally trimmed short, but he obviously didn’t care anymore. She silently pleaded him not to do this, but those dark eyes were not the same baby blue eyes she fell in love with. Those eyes were gone. That man was gone. She lowered her gaze back to the task at hand and did as he said.

 

“You fucking like that, don’t you? Do you miss it?”

 

Megan couldn’t speak. She tried to nod her head as Nick’s thrusts intensified. She gagged as he struck the back of her throat. He wasn’t this rough when they were a couple. She had never seen this side of him.

 

“That’s a good girl. Bet you wish it was the real thing.”

 

Nick pulled the six-inch barrel of his Smith and Wesson revolver out of her mouth. Its front sight knocked against her top teeth as it exited. Nick’s right hand was firmly around the wooden grip as he aimed the weapon between her eyes. Her saliva dripped off its black finish.

 

“Please,” she begged. “You don’t have to do this.”

 

Nick laughed. “What choice do I have? You dumped me. You called me a mistake. Well, this mistake is going to set things right.”

 

Megan sobbed uncontrollably while the man she once loved held a gun to her forehead. Why was he doing this, she asked herself. She had broken up with him about a year ago, but she had told Nick that she wanted to remain friends. He agreed, however quickly disappeared. No texts. No calls. He even left his job. She hadn’t seen him since. She thought this part of her life was over and done with. She was happy now in her new relationship. She had moved on. Apparently, Nick did not.

 

“I told you… I can’t change who I am.”

 

Nick pistol whipped the side of her head and without the use of her hands, Megan hit the floor hard on her side. At that moment, she was glad she finally finished renovating the inside of this old farmhouse after her parents left it to her. She had replaced the roof, fixed all the windows, painted all the walls, and most importantly, installed carpeting. Even so, she saw stars and before she could sit up, Nick flipped her over and pushed her face against the floor. She could feel his muscular frame pushing down on her tiny torso and more worrisome, the barrel pressed against the back of her head.

 

“Well, go on. You’re a carpet-muncher now, right?”

 

Crude, but he was right, she thought. Over a year ago, she finally realized she was a lesbian. While she cared a great deal for Nick, she never fully felt comfortable with him or any other guy in that way. It was hard to explain, but she knew she wasn’t feeling the same things that other girls felt with their boyfriends. It was as if she was playing some part in a play. She was trying to be the person her friends and family wanted her to be. After so many failed relationships with men her age, she had thought that maybe dating an older man was what she needed. None of her friends approved of Nick. One of her friends even suggested that she was trying to replace her father with him. She pressed on hoping that those feelings would bloom inside of her.

 

They never did.

 

As she grew more and more depressed, she sought out comfort in a fellow student she didn’t know very well. She thought the girl was just friendly. It turned out that she was attracted to Megan. After a drunken night of experiences Megan never had before, she knew, then and there, who she was. She couldn’t even remember the girl’s name, but she will never forget the way she made Megan feel. It was as if the final piece of the puzzle was put into place and she could finally be happy with whom she was as a person.

 

When she met Nick for dinner the next night, she had planned to tell him about her revelation and break up with him. She hoped he would take it well. I’m just a college student, she thought. I shouldn’t be expecting anything serious out of him and neither should he. We’re just two people having a good time.

 

Nick had different plans that night.

 

He had a ring in his pocket.

 

“You said you loved me!” he screamed, shocking her back to present-day reality. “I left my wife for you. I risked my whole career for you.”

 

He was right again. They had met as student and teacher at a state university. She was in her first year, trying to finish up her prerequisites when she decided to take Professor Heston’s Intro to American History class. She was barely passing her other classes, but she excelled in his class. Professor Heston showed such passion during his lectures that she hung on every word. She quickly found herself moving from the back of the lecture hall to the front row, from the classroom to his office, from calling him Professor Heston to calling him Nick, from campus coffee shops to hotel rooms. Before she knew it, she was in a full-fledged relationship with a man twenty years her senior, and he was leaving his wife for her.

 

“I’m sorry, Nick. I truly am. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I had just moved out of my mom’s house and started college. Everything was so new to me. I didn’t even know myself.”

 

“It’s too late to apologize. What’s done is done, but don’t you worry. I can fix this.”

 

Nick climbed off her and rolled her onto her back. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a grey rag. He used it to wipe the spit off his gun. Megan could smell the oil on the cloth.

 

It was then that she remembered what had happened. It all came rushing back to her. There was a knock on the door. She wasn’t expecting anybody and didn’t receive many visitors this far out in the country. She could see a shadowy silhouette behind the frosted glass window on the almost new door. She didn’t even think twice before she opened it. She was so shocked to see Nick standing there. His unkempt hair, unshaven face, and clothes were so out of character for him. In the past, he had always liked to dress professionally, whether he was in the classroom or lounging around at home. His closet had nothing but sweater vests and tweed jackets. He stood at the entryway in an old, stained sweatshirt and torn jeans that looked like they weren’t good enough for the Goodwill. No words were shared between them. Her jaw hung open and she didn’t have time to react, as he lunged for her and pressed that smelly rag over her mouth and nose. When she awoke, she found herself staring down the barrel of one of the guns from his antique collection.

 

The present situation hadn’t changed much.

 

“You see, Meg, while you were snoozing, I did some snooping. I’ve been watching you for some time now and I know what your girlfriend looks like, but I didn’t know her name. Luckily, all you kids have cell phones and you didn’t delete those text messages from earlier today. You know the ones. I love you more. No, I love you more. Guess what, darling? I texted Shannon and she should be here any minute.”

 

Megan felt her heart stop. “Don’t hurt her!”

 

Nick smiled and started walking in a circle around her. “That’s exactly what I plan to do, Meg. That’s part one: Kill the bitch. Do you want to know what part two is? I bet you can’t guess.”

 

“Please…I’ll do whatever you want. Just leave her alone.”

 

Nick brought his boot down on the side of her ribs. Megan curled up in the fetal position with tears streaming down her face.

 

“You were supposed to say, ‘Why yes, Nick. I would love to hear part two of your brilliant plan.’ And I would say, ‘Thank you for asking and being so polite, Meg’.

 

Part two involves the concept of Stockholm’s Syndrome. Pop quiz time, class. Have you heard of it? Probably not. Too busy making googly eyes at your teacher and ruining his life. Anyways, the year was 1973. In Stockholm, Sweden, some bank employees were taken hostage for about six days, around 130 hours. In that short amount of time, they formed an emotional connection to their captors to the point of sympathizing with them and even defending them after they were free.

 

That’s what I want from you, darling. I’m not going to kill you. I just want to keep you here for a while. We’ll talk and reminisce about the good times. Eventually, you will start falling for me all over again. I want you to love me again. I WILL make you love me. Say that you love me.”

 

“I . . . I can’t.”

 

Nick brought his foot down, stomping on her ribs again. “Say it!”

 

“I . . . HATE YOU!”

 

Nick had his foot raised for another assault but put it down. Instead, he climbed on top of Megan and wrapped his hands around her throat. “It doesn’t have to be like this, Meg. Why are you being so difficult? It can be like it was. What do I have to do? Brick up all the windows and doors? I’ll do it if it means you’ll love me again.”

 

Megan tried bucking him off with her legs and hips, but it was no use. He outweighed her and with her hands behind her back, she had no chance of prying his off her neck. She couldn’t get any air and was fading fast. The last thing she had heard before she passed out was Nick whispering in her ear, “I love you.”

 

Megan felt like everyone in the restaurant was staring at them. Friday night was date night in Anytown, USA. Every table in this fancy restaurant had two people: One man and one woman. That is, except for theirs.

 

“Hello? Earth to Meg.”

 

Megan turned her attention back to her date, Shannon. She was tall, blonde, and very attractive. She would be Megan’s type if Megan had dated the same sex long enough to even have a type. And from the way each of them dressed in those short, tight, black dresses, nobody in the room would confuse them for sisters eating out.

 

“I’m listening. It’s just that I’m not used to this. I don’t think I’ve been out on a date-date with a woman before.”

 

“Oh, I’m sorry. Is picking up straight, drunken sorority girls more your thing, I take it?”

 

Megan blushed and looked away. It was true. Ever since she’d found out she was gay, she started going to a lot of parties, finding the drunkest, hottest girls, and seeing how far she could take things. Sometimes they ended up back at her apartment, but most of the time, it was just some random room at whatever frat or sorority house where the party was being held. Almost all of the women were straight, but Megan didn’t care as long as she got what she wanted. She wasn’t interested in jumping into another long term relationship since she just broke up with what’s-his-face.

 

Shannon was different, though. Shannon was in her Composition class at the University. They had to work together on an assignment for a few weeks. Megan was attracted to her, but unless she planned on sneaking alcohol into the classroom, it wasn’t going to happen. To her surprise, Shannon made the first move and asked her out on a date.

 

“I’m new to all this,” admitted Megan. “I guess I don’t have a very good ‘gaydar’ or whatever you called it. If I can’t spot them, how can I ask them out? I’m not used to being out in public either. It feels weird.”

 

Shannon smirked. She picked up her butter knife and water glass. She struck the glass several times, silencing the room. “May I have your attention, please?”

 

“What are you doing?”

 

Shannon shushed her and went back to addressing the room, “I’d like to make an announcement. We’re lesbians and we’re on a date. That is all.”

 

Shannon put down her glass, grabbed a dinner roll, and used the knife to butter it. All the while, Megan wanted to die right there. The restaurant sat in stunned silence and then, gradually, returned to normal.

 

“Feel better?” Shannon had asked before she took a bite.

 

“Not really. I can’t believe you did that. What are you going to do on our next date? Buy a billboard with a picture of the two of us?”

 

Shannon smiled. “Why, Meg, did you just ask me out on a second date? I do believe I’ve made some progress with you. Billboard? Usually, lesbians bring moving trucks with them to their second dates.”

 

Megan gave her a weird  look.

 

“Sorry. Bad lesbian joke. Yes, Meg, if you’re asking, I’d love to go out on another date with you, but I’d really like to finish this one first.”

 

Their plates arrived and left with no more embarrassing incidents. The two walked out of the restaurant after some flirtatious small talk. Oddly enough, Megan did find herself more comfortable after Shannon told everyone in the room her ‘dirty secret’. After eating, they went to a local bar that Megan knew all too well. Shannon promised she wasn’t going to get drunk. She didn’t want Megan taking advantage of her on the first date. They were going to take it slow. Maybe on the second date, she joked, they could do it in the back of the moving truck.

 

But once again, Shannon made the first move. Kissing led to heavy petting, which led to cheers and leers from the bar patrons. It was Shannon who suggested taking it back to her dorm for some privacy.

 

They walked hand-in-hand to the ironic ‘girls only’ dorm. They rushed to her room as fast as they could to avoid the monitors. Once there, the kissing and groping resumed. They fell onto the bed together with Shannon on top. Shannon’s mouth tasted of strawberries, like the daiquiri she was drinking.

 

Shannon’s lips left hers. She took Megan’s hands off her breasts and forced them against the bed. Megan was confused until she saw Shannon’s smirk. Shannon sat up, climbed on top of her, and asked Megan to close her eyes. When she did, Megan felt her dress being pulled up above her hips. Megan shuttered as Shannon’s hand pressed against her stomach and slowly slid down the front of her black, silk thong. Her fingers brushed passed her trimmed pubic hair and two slid inside her wetness.

 

Megan arched her back and moaned. As she gripped the sheets, she opened her eyes and was staring directly into Shannon’s. Her lips trembled as Shannon’s fingers moved faster. This is the one, she thought. No more taking home straight girls in the hopes of making a connection. This was real. This was what she really wanted.

 

Megan wanted to touch Shannon, but her hands still gripped the sheets, unable to move. Their eyes were still locked. She felt an orgasm coming as Shannon’s fingers teased and thrust into her. Shannon closed her eyes, breaking eye contact, and leaned down. Meg closed her eyes too and her lips parted as Shannon’s tongue found its way in. Megan was on the verge of screaming in pleasure.

 

But something was wrong. The sweet flavor of strawberries was gone and in its place, the taste of cheap whiskey. Megan’s eyes flashed open.

 

Nick was on top of her.

 

She felt his coarse face against hers and his tongue swirling around in her mouth. Even worse, she could feel that her jeans were undone and his hand was inside her underwear. She was repulsed and felt bile coming up the back of her throat. Without thinking, Megan bit down hard on his tongue. Nick let out a yell and pulled himself away. She no longer had to worry about tasting whiskey. The coppery taste of blood filled her mouth now.

 

“Fucking bitch!” Nick screamed as he brought his foot down repeatedly on her already sore ribs. Megan was crying in pain, but also because of the violation. She curled up onto her side and prayed to God for help or to just to let her die right there. All of a sudden, the blows stopped and Nick walked over to the window.

 

Megan wiped her eyes on the carpet the best she could. She looked down at her open jeans and her lace panties, Shannon’s favorite. That’s when she saw it: A nail file. She had been looking for it a couple of days ago and there it was, under an end table. It was only a couple of feet away from her. She quickly looked away and back at Nick, hoping he didn’t see what she saw.

 

He was too busy looking out the window. “I think we have company.”

 

Megan knew it was Shannon. She could now hear the distinct sound of a car with a broken muffler. It was damaged weeks ago when she was driving down the dirt road to Megan’s house. As a poor college student, she had little money for car repairs and it would have to wait until a student loan kicked in. Megan was so used to the sound that she could tell that Shannon was at the end of her long, private driveway.

 

Megan knew she had to act quickly. While Nick was distracted, Megan had to take this opportunity to quickly and quietly roll over to the nail file. She got on her stomach and rolled onto her back. Almost there, she thought. She rolled onto her stomach again and then, to her back. She heard a crack and bit down on her lip to stop from screaming. Something felt wrong with her hand and now, the memory was coming back to her.

 

She remembered feeling woozy. She was starting to come around after Nick knocked her out at the front door. The gun and her ex-lover’s sinister smile was the first thing she saw when her vision came into focus. Her head felt like it weighed a thousand pounds, as she tried to move it to make sense of her surroundings. She could see a roll a duct tape sitting out and thought it was out of place on the kitchen counter. She couldn’t remember how or why she was sitting here.

 

“Let me see your left hand.”

 

Her mind screamed at her not to listen, but for some reason, her body did as it was told. As opposed to her head, her hand felt weightless. It was drawn to Nick’s voice, almost floating to him. Nick took her hand and slid a ring onto her ring finger. Even groggy, Megan could see that it was the engagement ring he wanted to give her the night they broke up.

 

“This ring was. . . is a symbol of my love for you. You didn’t care. You never even put it on. Doesn’t it look good on your finger?”

 

Megan tried to shake her head, but she wasn’t sure if her body obeyed. Her head definitely moved in some sort of motion and she felt like passing out again.

 

Nick smiled. “Our love is forever. This ring is never going to leave this finger.”

 

Nick turned the ring so the diamond was jutting out to the side. He then put her limp hand down on the counter and held it by the wrist. With his other hand, he produced a hammer. “You know what they say…Love hurts.”

 

He brought the hammer down on. The first hit missed and struck her middle finger. Megan cried out in pain. The numbness in her head did not translate to her appendages. The second hit was true. Nick looked at his handy work and hit ring again. Megan fell off her chair into the living room. She raised her hand to her face. She saw her two fingers bent unnaturally and the dented gold band cutting into her ring finger. As she heard the ripping of duct tape, Megan felt herself passing out from the pain.

 

“What the fuck are you doing!?”

 

Megan looked up as Nick rushed towards her. Ignoring the pain, she rolled one more time onto her stomach and then, rolled onto her side. With her back to the table, she strained to reach under it. Nick was on her quickly. She tried to kick at him, but he easily picked her up from the floor and threw her onto the couch. He sat next to her and pointed his gun at the front door.

 

“We’re going to sit right here and wait for your girlfriend to walk through that door. I know she has a key. I’ve watched her come by many of nights and leave in the mornings after you two do what you sickos do.”

 

Megan shifted uncomfortably on the couch, trying to put some space between her and Nick and at the same time, position the sharp end of the nail file against the duct tape. She managed to poke it through the area between her wrists and started to saw.

 

Megan heard Shannon’s car pull up to the house. She heard the car door squeak as it opened, even over the messed-up muffler. For some reason, Shannon left her car running. Perhaps she was having battery issues again. Megan let out a scream, but Nick quickly pushed his forearm against her throat. With his other hand, he pulled out that gun oil rag and began stuffing it into her mouth. She gagged at the taste. At least her nose was uncovered, but the smell still invaded her nostrils.

 

Nick pointed his gun back at the door. “That wasn’t very smart, babe. No wonder you were failing all your other classes. Just sit tight. Once this whore is out of our life, we can begin again.”

 

Megan’s eyes watered. The oil was strong and she started to feel lightheaded. I have to hang on, she thought as she regained her grip on the nail file. She started sawing again when she heard the familiar creaks and groans on her porch steps.

 

Her mind flashed back to the time, Shannon tried to sneak out and sneak back in with groceries to cook her breakfast in bed after their first night together in the house. She failed miserably, but they had a blast cooking together.

 

“This is so exciting. We’re going to be so happy together.”

 

Creak.

 

And the time Shannon blindfolded her and led her up the steps to a surprise birthday party. Balloons and streamers covered the bare, unpainted walls. Her friends and most importantly, her mother yelled, “Surprise,” when she took her blindfold off.

 

“Nothing will ever get between us again.”

 

Creak.

 

And the time Megan’s grandmother died and Shannon held her, as she walked her up those steps after the funeral. She was there for the good times and the bad.

 

“You’re going to be my little teacher’s pet again.”

 

Creak.

 

Megan blinked her eyes, trying get rid of the tears blurring her vision. In the door’s window, she made out the feminine silhouette of her girlfriend. She never knocked. She never rang the doorbell. She always came right in. Megan felt some of the duct tape give away, but she wasn’t free yet.

 

“There’s our girl.”

 

Megan kept sawing as the silhouette stood at the window.

 

“Come on. What is she doing? You don’t have to huff and puff. The door is open.”

 

Megan felt more duct tape come loose. She pulled and twisted, but it was not enough. Shannon’s blurry form reached up and looked as if she was going to knock. Then, a dark rectangle came into view and was pressed against the window. Shannon turned away and quickly made it down the steps.

 

Creak. Groan. Creak.

 

Nick got up and rushed to the door. As he pulled it open and raised his gun, Shannon’s beat-up car had already sped out of the semi-circle driveway, leaving a trail of dust. Nick stood there for a second in shock. The sound of the car faded into the distance.

 

Megan had no idea what was going on, but she knew she still had to get free. Plans had changed. Maybe Nick would go after Shannon.

 

Nick turned and looked at the outside of the door. He pulled the rectangle off. Megan could now see it was an envelope. Nick pulled up the flap and took out a folded sheet of paper. He stood there reading and after a few moments, started laughing.

 

Megan’s wrists were still bound, but she finally managed to spit out the oily rag. She gasped for clean air. At least, I won’t pass out now, she thought.

 

“You’re never going to believe this, sweetheart.”

 

Nick walked over to her and stood in front of the couch with his revolver held at his side and the letter raised in front of him.

 

“It’s time for one of my lectures, my dear. You always loved them. Well, class is in session.” His voiced boomed as if he were in his old classroom auditorium. “Get your notebooks and pencils out. It’s time to take notes. Our reading homework for the week was a letter from a lesbian slut named Shannon. Miss Weber, did you do the assigned reading?”

 

Megan didn’t give him the satisfaction of answering. He knew she hadn’t read it. He was just playing up the showman in him. It used to make her feel giddy inside when she was in his classroom, but now, it made her sick.

 

“I’ll take that as a ‘no’. Miss Weber, if you plan on passing my class, you’ll need to do the assigned reading. Now, I’ll let you slide this time because you’re so damn cute.” He smiled and winked at her. “How about I read it to you? It’s hilarious.

 

Meg,

I’m sorry to do this like this, but I can’t bear to face you. I think I’ve made a horrible mistake. My time with you has been great. It really has. It’s just that I think I still like guys. They say college is the place for girls to experiment. Well, I think that’s all this was for me. I thought this was what I wanted, but I was wrong. Please, don’t be mad.

Hopefully still your friend,

Shannon”

 

Nick put the paper down on the counter, pulled out a red pen, and started making marks on the page. Megan’s eyes were watering, despite having gotten rid of the rag. She couldn’t believe Shannon was breaking up with her. She didn’t even have the guts to face me, she thought. For a few moments, she was alone with her thoughts until she heard Nick laughing once again.

 

“I hope you can see why I find this so funny. She called you a mistake. She wants to be just friends. This all sounds so familiar! It’s Shakespearean even! By the way, I also found it funny because of all her spelling and grammatical errors. Seriously, how did you girls get into college?”

 

Megan quietly sobbed. She no longer cared that her life was in danger. Shannon was her everything. Without her, she thought, I have no reason to go on.

 

Nick walked over to her, leaned forward, and snapped his fingers. “Hey, Miss Weber. Can you compose yourself for a moment and explain to the rest of your classmates what Shannon was trying to say in this letter? What symbolism can we find in her words?”

 

Nick pushed the letter towards her. With one fluid motion, her now free fist swung, driving the nail file through the letter and into the side of Nick’s neck. Nick screamed and stumbled backwards. The previously white letter now bloomed red as blood gushed from his neck. He dropped the revolver and it went off. Megan felt the bullet fly by her hair and heard glass shatter as it hit a picture frame on the wall.

 

Nick fell onto his back. He reached upwards towards Megan and tried to speak, but only gurgles came forth. He managed to grab the nail file and pull it out. Blood sprayed against the carpet. Shannon’s note fell to the side. Megan got up from the couch, walked towards Nick, reached across the kitchen counter, and grabbed the almost forgotten hammer. Megan knelt down and grabbed Nick’s hand that held the nail file. She brought down the hammer repeatedly, all the while Nick tried to scream. When his hand was a mush of bone and flesh and looked much, much worse than her hand, she picked his gun up off the floor with her good hand and sat on top of Nick. She smiled at him and shoved the barrel against his lips.

 

“Suck it.”

 

Nick’s eyes went wide. His pupils darted in all directions. His good hand slapped against Megan’s body, but he was losing his strength fast. She easily pinned it to the floor with her free but crippled hand.

 

“You like that, don’t ya?” she said as she forced his mouth open with the gun. His mouth was an overflowing lake of blood as she dipped the barrel in, like one might do with their big toe to test the water.

 

“I should have taken European history. I don’t know what was worse; having to sit through those boring, two hour lectures, or having to wait two hours for you to get it up and me having to fake it because you could only last a few minutes.“ She quickly jammed it against the back of his throat. She cocked the hammer back as he gagged, either on the barrel or his own blood.

 

“Class dismissed.”

 

Megan fired. The gun kicked back, throwing her, some blood, and a couple of Nick’s teeth onto the floor. She sat up and looked at the carnage before her. Brain matter and flesh with wet clumps of hair spread out behind Nick’s head like gory butterfly wings. She was about to look away when she noticed a square of light appear in his pocket. Then, she heard a buzzing sound. My phone, she thought. She switched the gun to her bad hand, reached into Nick’s pocket, and retrieved her phone. The screen told her it was Shannon calling. After a few more buzzes, she decided to answer.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Did you get my letter?”

 

Megan stared down at the bloody paper on the floor. Blood spatter had ruined most of the letter, but she could still see the words, ‘mistake’ and ‘hopefully still your friend’.

 

“Yeah, I got it.”

 

“I’m sorry. You deserve more than a stupid letter. Can I come over and explain?”

 

Megan was quiet. She looked down at her dead ex. She turned to the couch to sit down when she saw the bullet hole that went through the picture on the wall. It was a picture of Shannon and her. The bullet hit Shannon dead center on her forehead.

 

“Meg? Are you there?”

 

“Yeah, I’m here,” she said as she stared at the revolver in her hand. “You can come over now, if you’d like.”

 

“Okay, I’ll head back there now. Thanks for understanding, Meg.”

 

“No problem.”

 

Megan hung up and sat down on the couch. All around her was blood and gore. Her house was in shambles. Her life was in shambles.

 

But she could fix this.

 

“I can fix this. I can fix us. I can make you love me again. I will make you love me.”