Chapter 6

“Your pack is amazing,” I told Rafe later after I phased in the cave and he came in wearing the shorts and shirt I had bought. “They care about you very much.”

“And I, them,” he said. He wrapped the rope he had gotten from the cooler around his waist and tucked it under the shorts. “They saved my life and gave me a reason to live.” He shook out the bear skin and spread it near the fire he had built. “You can sleep here.”

“I don't sleep, remember?” I said, though the bed looked very inviting and after the chase, my limbs felt heavy with exhaustion. My mind raced and I knew it would be a long time before I would be able to give in to sleep.

“That's right,” he said. He glanced at me with a teasing twinkle in his eyes. “The insomniac werewolf who chases elk by night and saves poor, caged wild creatures by day.”

I sat on the rug and smiled. “You aren't the poor, wild creature I thought you were.”

He gave me an unreadable look. “Aren't I?”

I shook my head and concentrated on the bear's thick fur, running my hand along the surface to make patterns.

“Why did you really save me, Colleen?”

I glanced at him and he met my gaze full on, his brow furrowed. “I told you-” I began, but he cut me off.

“I know, my eyes.” A smile twitched at the corners of his mouth. “I can't believe that eyes would make you dare flames and death to save a stranger.”

I squirmed on the rug, but I couldn't find the words to answer his question.

“You fell in love with me.”

Rafe's soft words were spoken with certainty, and the truth that beat through my soul was echoed in his eyes. My heart slowed and I tried to deny the statement, but we both knew I couldn't. “Yes,” I finally whispered.

His fingers touched my chin and lifted my face so I would meet his eyes. “Did you know that wolves mate for life? They chose one wolf as their companion on this earth and I've seen many wolves who chose to live the rest of their lives alone after losing their mate.” His eyes were soft with understanding. “It's in the blood.”

I shook my head. “Not my blood,” I replied quietly. “I wasn't born a werewolf.”

“Yet here you are,” Rafe said with a smile. He brushed the hair back from my face with a finger, then sat down at the edge of the bear skin. “Men on the radio rave about God, or a higher power, or something in the universe that guides us for the greater good.” His gaze darkened and he stared out the cave entrance into the night. “I used to hate whatever that was, some insurmountable being who had allowed my parents to be slaughtered and let me live for no apparent reason.”

His gaze lightened and his golden eyes reminded me of the moon, calling to me with some unknown force, soothing the parts of me that felt sharp and jagged with everything that had happened. “But then I watched the wolves and felt the love and respect they had for each other. I remembered the way my mom used to look at my dad, and how they used to laugh and hold hands. It was enough to hope that someday I would feel the same way about someone.”

He dropped his eyes. “But all I am is really just a wild werewolf. I kill and I eat what I kill, I defend the pack with my life as they have defended me, and I have conversations with total strangers around campfires just to pretend that I’m human.” His brow tightened. “It really isn't much to offer.”

I stared at him, the way the firelight played off his tangled brown hair, casting the strong line of his jaw, his soft lips, and his dark brows in profile. My heart slowed at the self-deprecating look in his eyes and the scorn he felt for himself. His hands rested on his knees and when I touched one of them, he moved to turn away, but I caught his hand and wouldn't let go until he looked at me.

His eyes met mine with an exposed, haunted look. “I loved you before I even knew anything about you,” I said softly. “Everything I learn just adds to that love.” His eyes studied mine intently, looking for laughter or derision. When he found none, he dropped his eyes to our hands.

I took a steeling breath and continued, “I've found a werewolf who cares about his pack more than most do for their own family. I see someone who appreciates the forest in a way only those who have depended upon it for survival can. I hear the depth of love in your voice when you speak about your parents and I'm shocked to see that instead of being embittered or filled with hatred because of what you went through, you're humble and torn.”

He turned his face away, but I caught his cheek with my hand and drew it gently back to me. He blinked rapidly and tears shone in the firelight. I took a small breath. “And I see someone that I love so much it hurts.” He looked back at me and opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, I covered it with my own.

The kiss sent a thrill of warmth through my body. His lips were soft at first, then needing and wanting as though he couldn't get enough. He pulled away quicker than I was ready and stared at me, his eyes wide and still wet with tears. “Why love me?”

I blinked back tears of my own. “Powers of the universe?”

He laughed and pulled me into a hug so tight and fierce that for the first time since I phased under Tannin's supervision, I finally felt safe and wanted, not a problem for people to solve in Roger's case, or a sister to protect because I had been let down before, but as someone with needs and wants and feelings of my own. I hugged Rafe back as fiercely and felt him smile against my hair.

He finally let me go and fell back on the bear skin. “Loving you is exhausting.”

I laughed and pushed his shoulder. “Then sleep, you baby.” Dark rings circled his eyes, disclosing how late it truly was. After not sleeping last night, I realized I must not have looked much better.

“I'll sleep if you sleep,” he said, pulling me down next to him.

I shook my head. “Insomniac, remember?”

He sighed and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a close embrace I never wanted to break. “Then I'll sing and force you to listen until you want to escape my voice so badly you'll sleep just to get away.”

I laughed. “You have a wonderful voice. I'll take you up on your offer just so you have to sing to me again.”

He breathed into my hair. “I'll sing to you every night for the rest of our lives.”

“Promise?”

He nodded, then began a soft song about wolves disappearing into shadows and the moon searching for her lost children.