Chapter 9
I pulled off my shirt and tossed it on a branch of the gnarled tree I crouched behind. My side already throbbed and my stomach twisted at the thought of phasing, but I was committed. Backing out now would definitely show weakness. I kept telling myself it was only a run and let my body phase slowly into wolf form.
Pain like a dozen hot irons scalded my side as my skin and organs took on the wolf shape. I breathed through gritted teeth and kept silent, but by the time the phase was complete, the pain was so intense I threw up on the red sand and had to lie on my side for several minutes until my strength returned.
A howl sounded and I forced myself to my feet. My limbs trembled, but I shook my coat against the pain and trotted out from behind the bushes. Ben and Brian waited on a rise, both heads turned in my direction. I hoped they hadn't heard me lose my lunch, but there was nothing I could do about it. I pushed the pain down and loped to join them. They turned without a sound and fell in on either side of me. It was then that I knew this wasn't going to be just an ordinary run.
I decided to draw them away from Two, knowing that if the others joined in, I would have no chance. I loomed above them, a bear-sized black wolf with a smaller black wolf running on each side. The weakness through my limbs threatened to steal my strength and running took every ounce of willpower to push past the driving pain. I ran around brush I would normally jump, and took the path up a sandy wash to save my energy. Sunlight bounced off the deep red sand, casting shadows at the base of scrub brush and sage. The azure sky looked like a bowl turned upside down, watching the scene unfold below with the impassivity of the everlasting.
The threat and hostility underlying the scent of the two wolves burned into my mind. They had fought for Two on several other occasions, but accepted defeat almost before we had begun. This time was different; their confidence and the looks they threw each other set my teeth on edge. It disgusted me that they waited until I was at my weakest to challenge me for Two, but I was determined to defeat them no matter what the cost.
The brothers waited until we were several canyons away from Two to attack. They darted forward as one, but I was ready when Brian dove at my front paws. I jumped over his head and spun so that I landed facing them both. Ben snarled and tried to bowl me over with a shoulder against my chest, but I was stronger than either of them even injured.
I grabbed the back of Ben's neck and threw him to the side. He landed against a rock and whined, then charged back with another snarl. Brian leaped at my back when I turned to meet Ben's attack. I rolled and broke his grip on my fur. He hit the ground, leaving a jagged tear across my shoulder.
Ben dove at my throat as I rose back to my feet, but I ducked my head and his fangs lacerated my forehead instead. I gave an inward sigh of thanks for the hard skull my mom always complained about and forced him back. I wiped the blood from my eyes with a paw to clear my vision and felt Brian's jaws close around my back leg. I spun and grabbed his throat before he could leap clear.
I forced him onto his back on the ground. He struggled for a moment and the scent of desperation wafted heavily in the air. I tightened my hold and Brian gave in. His tail curled up to his stomach and he held still. A whine escaped his throat.
Ben advanced from my other side, but the growl that rumbled through my chest stopped him. He may have wanted to attack me, but his brother's life hung by the pressure of my fangs. Instinct bade me to tear into him, to put all the rage and frustration of the past weeks into ripping out his throat; but I knew my responsibilities and the consequences of such an action.
I clamped down briefly to remind him who was in charge, then slowly let go and stepped back to allow him to rise. He cast a furtive glance in my direction and ducked behind Ben. Red showed on Ben's muzzle from my bleeding forehead. He met my eyes for the briefest second, then turned away. I watched until the two brothers left around the next bend. As soon as they were out of sight, my legs gave out and I collapsed on the ground.
The pain that knifed through my side had doubled, and maneuvering through the fight had intensified it until I could barely think. Blood leaked in my eyes. I wiped my face on my shoulder and debated whether to phase or try to make it back to Two as a wolf. I didn't know if I could even survive another phase. I clenched my jaw and limped slowly back the way we had come.
My fear was that Ben and Brian would attack again while I was weak, but either my bravado fooled them or they realized the stupidity of their actions because I didn’t see them. The trek back to our camp felt twice as long. The sun pounded on my black fur with relentless fury, and the azure sky faded to a heartbreaking pale blue. The scent of sun-baked sage tickled my nose and I sneezed. Pure agony ripped through my stomach. I sat for five minutes convincing my legs to carry me despite the pain.
The outside doors at Two were designed to be pushed open by a nose or shoulder. I went to the little-used back door closest to my room and shoved it open, dismayed at how much strength it took. I limped down the hall to my rooms and was grateful to find that Nora had remembered not to shut the door all the way. I pushed it closed with my shoulder and made it to the middle of the living room floor before I collapsed. My body shuddered. I tried to keep from phasing, but lost control through the pain. The phase stretched my wounds and sent a dagger of pain through my side so sharp a yell tore from my lips. I curled in around my side and tried to remain conscious.
“Vance?” Panic filled Nora's voice. Her footsteps ran into the room and fingers touched my shoulder so softly I barely felt them. “Vance, what happened?”
She ran to the door and I listened to her footsteps fade away. I sat up and had the presence of mind to pull a blanket from the couch down to cover my nakedness. Two sets of footsteps returned and the door was shoved open. “Vance, I tried to warn-“ Traer’s eyes widened and he paused, his eyes on the blood streaming down my forehead.
“Not as bad as it looks,” I forced out. Pain throbbed with every breath.
Relief flooded Nora's eyes and she smiled despite a tear that trickled down her cheek.
“It looks pretty bad,” Traer replied. A muscle twitched in his jaw. “What on earth happened?”
“Brian and Ben attacked me.”
The words sent a surge of anger through my limbs and I pushed up despite the pain. Both of them moved to help me, but I gave them a sharp look and they waited. I sat on the edge of the couch and tried to clear the pain and anger from my thoughts so I could think clearly.
“What are you going to do?” Traer asked softly after a moment.
A dark numbness filled my chest, black and angry. Betrayal. That was how it felt to be attacked by two of the werewolves I had grown up with. The fact that they waited until I was at my weakest showed a cowardice I had never taught them. Fury burned through my body and I grabbed a lamp from the end table and threw it across the room. It shattered against the wall and fell to pieces on the ground. The tinkling of broken glass reminded me of the wind chimes that used to hang on our porch during my brief childhood.
I sat back with my eyes on the mess I had made. The pain was a dull throb within my anger. “Throw them out.”
“It's about time,” Traer replied with a candor that surprised me. I glanced at him and he shrugged. “They're getting a bit big for their britches. Time they started to fend for themselves.”
Traer lifted a bandage and I shook my head. I brushed a hand across the wound on my forehead and found that it was already healing. “I’ll be fine,” I said. Bandages were the least of my worries at the moment. Disagreement colored his eyes, but he knew better than to argue. “You know they won't go lightly.”
The young doctor nodded. “And Max and Drake'll probably go with them. I can't speak for Thomas. There's no telling what he'll do.”
The last Alpha of our group was surprisingly mild for his football player stature. Next to me, he was the largest member of the group, but he tended to keep out of disputes. When he did decide it was time to leave, he would go quietly; of that I was sure.
Something was bothering the gray werewolf. Frustration showed clearly on his face edged with something else. “What’s wrong?” I asked.
“I think you need to see a real doctor.”
“You are a real doctor,” I pointed out. “And I’m healing.”
He gave me a tolerant look and nodded his head toward my throbbing side and the bruises that spidered away from the scar. “A specialist, then.”
“In the internal workings of werewolf organs? The specialist would probably be a Hunter,” I replied dryly. I glanced at Nora and regretted the statement. “I didn't mean it that way.”
She smiled sadly. “Unfortunately it's true, at least for my Dad's faction. He'd probably heal you, then kill you just for the sport of it.”
“Sounds pleasant,” Traer said, his voice tight at the thought.
I tried to find a more comfortable position on the couch, then winced when another sharp pain surged through my side. Nora set a hand on my arm and Traer stepped closer. I rolled my eyes, but felt touched by their concern. “I'm alright, really.”
“I'll believe it when I see it,” Traer replied, but he turned away at my look. “I'm going to see if Seth's got dinner started.” He smiled at Nora. “Maybe it'll actually be edible thanks to your tutoring.”
“Who would have thought werewolves would be such eager students?” she asked with a laugh.
“We get a little bored here,” Traer replied. He nodded at me and left the room.
I leaned against the couch and thought vaguely that the blood from my shoulder was going to ruin the leather. Nora watched me for a moment, then settled next to me and stared at the wall. “Why did you agree to go running with them?” she asked after a couple of minutes had passed.
“It sounded like fun,” I replied as more of a question than a statement. I could feel her disapproving stare and sighed. “It's an Alpha thing.”
“So because I'm not a werewolf I couldn't possibly understand it?” the accusation in her voice covered the hurt she felt at being left out.
I tipped my head to look at her. “Alphas grow up knowing that someday they'll be in charge of the protection and wellbeing of their own pack. We normally test our strength against our fathers and other members of their pack, making sure that we're ready for when we set out on our own.”
“But you don't have a pack here,” Nora said with dawning understanding in her voice. “You're left to pit against your peers. What were your parents thinking?”
I shrugged, then clenched my teeth at the resulting pain. “Maybe we would grow out of it, or they could put it off until we had our own packs and they wouldn't have to deal with it.”
“They're shrugging off their responsibility.” Anger touched her voice.
I felt a sudden need to defend my mother. No matter what I had gone through, she still acted like my mom long after Dad quit the charade that had become our lives. “They see it as protecting us. We safe here, fed-”
“If you can call it that,” she cut in.
I continued, “We have clothes, food, shelter, and access to the finest schools by the internet as well as the connections to attend any of them electronically. Our needs are taken care of.”
“Except emotionally,” she pointed out.
My voice dropped. “Emotional security comes when Hunters are killing off every Alpha they can get their hands on and you're safe because your parents have the foresight to hide you away.” I took a calming breath and said quietly, “Even when their friends are being killed.”
She closed her eyes for a second; when she looked at me again there was something unreadable in them. Her hand reached up and she set it gently on my jaw. “You are their emotional security,” she said quietly. “You tolerate this for them.”
“They care in their own way,” I replied past a tremble through my limbs that had nothing to do with pain. I closed my eyes and turned my face into her hand. “Like I care.” Her scent filled my nose and my head clouded past any other thought.
Her other hand touched my dark blond hair hesitantly, then her fingers tangled in it, brushing my ear and sending a surge of heat through my body. “You care so much,” she whispered.
I opened my eyes and tried to think past the fog in my mind that came from being so close to her, but my brain refused to process anything but the nearness of her lips and the way her eyes peered into mine with such intensity, but also with a touch of fear that showed she was afraid of what could happen. An echoing surge of emotion rushed through my chest and it was all I could do to keep from kissing her. “We have to be careful,” I breathed out haltingly.
“You're never careful,” she replied with a smile that melted onto my lips.
The taste of her kiss sent such a strong surge of need and want through me that I could barely breathe. I kissed her back and felt the need echoed through her touch. Her hand drifted from my jaw to my chest and felt so hot against my bare skin I imagined that it left a red outline. I didn't care if such a mark lasted a lifetime.
My cell phone rang and jolted us back to reality. Our lips separated and we stared at each other, amazed at what had happened, at the gulf that had been crossed. The fact that she was a Hunter mattered little to me anymore. I saw the same realization in her eyes and the bashful way she lowered them to her hand on my chest.
She pulled it back and I longed for her touch again. The phone gave another insistent ring. “You better take it,” Nora said quietly.
I didn’t want to. I had never wanted to ignore the phone more. Nora picked it up and handed it to me, expectancy and a touch of humor in her gaze. I shook my head. She laughed and flipped it open. I sighed and was about to hit the speaker phone button by habit, but remembered Mom's previous opinions regarding Nora and lifted it to my ear.
“Hello?”
“I'm calling to apologize for our conversation the other day,” Mom said in a voice that sounded resigned and apologetic at the same time.
I smiled because she sounded the same way about every other time she called, usually because we both ended up saying things we weren't proud of. “I'm sorry, too. I have a knack for pushing your buttons.”
“You do,” she agreed without admitting that she was at fault for the conversation as well.
I took a shallow breath against a surge of pain through my side. “I'm kicking Ben and Brian out of Two today.”
“What? Why?” Mom demanded.
“They attacked me when we were out running. They're trying for leadership of Two.”
I could almost hear Mom's teeth grinding through the phone and knew neither werewolf wanted to see the look she had on her face. “I'm going to call their mothers,” she said.
I fought back a laugh. “They're not kids, Mom. They're eighteen. It's time for them to leave anyway.”
“Yes, but after all we've done for them, given them a safe place away from killers. . . .”
She paused and I knew the topic turned her thoughts to Nora. I spoke before she could. “I'm taking care of it, so don't worry. I'll let you know how it goes.”
I was about to hang up the phone when she said with more concern than I could remember hearing from her, “Are you okay? Did they hurt you?”
I hesitated, then brought the phone back up. “I'm alright. Nothing a night's rest won't heal.”
“Traer told me your side is still giving you problems,” she said.
A grim smile touched my lips. “He worries too much.”
“You don't worry enough,” she replied.
I rolled my eyes at the same words Traer had said before the run. “Maybe so, but it's working out. Let their parents know they might be seeing more of their sons soon.”
“Good riddance,” Mom said the words I felt.
I hung up the phone and Nora leaned against my shoulder. “You're a good son.”
I shook my head. “Not really, but we both gave up pretending long ago. I think we understand each other better this way.”
She sat in silence for a few minutes, then sighed.
“What?” I asked even though my stomach twisted at the direction I guessed her thoughts had taken.
“I miss my dad,” she said, confirming my guess. “He worries, too.”
After my conversation with Mom I didn't feel that I could rightfully deny her unspoken request. I held out the phone and her eyes lit up. “Really?”
I nodded. “Just remember how many lives are in your hands.”
She sobered a bit, but dialed the number with a smile of anticipation. The phone rang twice, then a deep voice answered.
“Hello?”
“Daddy?”
“Noralie? Is that you?” Sharp relief colored his voice. “Are you okay?”
“I'm fine, Dad, and I'm safe.”
“When the others didn't come back, we assumed the worst. We’ve been searching night and day, but it’s like you vanished off the face of the Earth. Is everyone alright?”
The sadness in her voice broke my heart. “They're all dead.”
His voice tightened. “What happened? Where are you? I'm coming to get you.”
Nora's eyes flicked to mine. “That's not possible.” She rushed on before he could argue, “We happened upon a werewolf hideout and Jerome thought we could take them. Everyone was killed and they were going to kill me, too, but one of the werewolves saved my life. He's keeping me safe.”
“You're being held captive?” The anger that laced his voice sent a surge of adrenaline through my body. I rubbed my knuckles together and tried to stay calm. “Do you know where you're at? I’ll find you and have them all destroyed. You'll be safe.”
“Dad. Dad!” It took a minute for him to calm down.
Tears glistened in Nora's eyes at the fear in his voice. The longing that shone in them was unmistakable, and I knew I couldn't keep her at Two any longer. “I'll take you to him,” I whispered. A pain close to that in my side ran through my heart at the thought of letting her go.
Her eyes widened and the tears that had sparkled in them fell down her cheeks. “Really?”
“You want to go home. I won't make you stay.”
I forced a smile at the way her eyes brightened and she told her dad, “Vance says he'll take me to you. I can come home!”
He fell silent for a minute and when he cleared his throat, I realized he had also been crying. I hated myself for the pain I had put them through, and felt equal pain for the families of all the Hunters that lay dead in White Horse Canyon. When her father spoke again, his voice was slightly unsteady. “Where can I meet you?”
She looked at me, her eyes searching mine. I thought quickly. “Four Corners,” I said. It was hours away and would throw him off if he tried to search for us. “We can meet him at sunrise.”
“Sunrise at Four Corners,” she repeated with such enthusiasm my heart ached. She met my gaze and her smile faltered. “But Dad, I want your word that Vance won't be hurt and he'll be allowed to go back home without anyone following him.”
I frowned, but she waited for her father to reply. He took a breath. “He'll be protected; you have my word.”
“Dad,” Nora said with a sudden sternness that said she knew her father well. “He saved my life and I want to make sure he isn't hurt. If he'll be in danger, I won't come.”
I pictured him making a face like my mom when I argued. He replied in a tight, controlled voice, “He'll be safe. I promise.”
I didn't believe him, but Nora smiled. “Thank you, Daddy. I'll see you tomorrow morning.”
“I'll be there,” he vowed.
She hung up the phone, then threw her arms around me with such vigor my breath caught at the pain. “Thank you so much,” she said. “I can't describe how much it means to me to see him again.” She realized what she was doing and dropped her arms. The blush touched her cheeks again. “Sorry. I forgot.”
I gave a weak smile. “It's alright.” I studied the red rock wall across from us. “So. Tomorrow, huh?” I said after a minute.
She smiled. “Yes, tomorrow.” She gave me a warm smile. “Thank you very much, Vance. I don't know how to repay you.”
My eyebrows rose. “Maybe by not letting your dad kill me?”
She laughed. “It'll be okay, don't worry.”
But I wasn't so sure.
“Come on tough guy,” Nora said, rising from the couch. She held out a hand. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”
I grunted with the pain of standing. Nora slipped under my arm and helped me limp to the bathroom. I stood in the shower, then jerked back as water hit me. I had expected Nora to go, but she stood behind me with a white washrag in one hand. “Don’t worry,” she said with a teasing gleam in her eyes. “I’m just going to help you wash off the worst of it.
The blanket around my waist hung soaked and tattered, but I kept a tight hold on it. Somehow, being in the shower with Nora at my back made me feel more vulnerable than I had ever been in my entire life. She waited a minute, then the soft fibers of the rag worked slowly over the tear in my shoulder from Brian’s teeth. The water that pooled around my feet turned red before rushing down the drain. My legs felt suddenly weak. I leaned my forehead against the cool tile of the shower wall and closed my eyes.
Nora stopped. “Are you alright?”
I nodded, but couldn’t find the words to speak.
“Want to sit down?” Nora asked.
I backed up and she helped me slide down to sit so the water hit my chest. I hated that I was so vulnerable and weak in front of her that I needed her assistance to sit down. She could kill me with a single shot, regardless of how bad her aim had been the last time. Yet she tended to me. The thought curled around my heart and confused my thoughts. I ducked my head on my knees, careful to keep the blanket in place. Nora knelt beside me, and after a minute she continued washing my shoulder.
“Sorry,” I said quietly. “I just got dizzy.”
“You’ve lost a lot of blood,” she replied. “Are you sure you don’t want Traer to look at these?”
I nodded and sat back. She moved to wash my face without care for how the water drenched her clothes and hair. Her sunflower and vanilla scent held the cinnamon and sage smell of the red rocks. It suited her, but I refrained from saying it.
I closed my eyes as she worked on the gash and fought back a smile when she muttered something about me not taking good enough care of myself. “As I recall,” I said quietly. “I found you in here not too long ago.”
I opened my eyes to find her watching me, a slight smile on her face. “That was different.”
Her searching look made me feel bare, exposed in ways I couldn’t hide. I studied the blood that pooled from the fang marks around my ankle. I forgot that it had been bitten. The blood trickled down my skin and touched the water with red before it swirled away and was washed out, forgotten. I felt much the same way before Nora came along. Now, her presence was too near and too real. I gave her everything without thought of how it would work out. Now she was leaving.
“I can take care of the rest,” I said quietly without meeting her eyes.
“Are you sure?” she asked.
When I didn’t answer, she rose and stepped out of the shower. She hesitated in the bathroom, then the door closed. A growl escaped my lips and I hit the floor of the shower hard enough to shatter a tile. I stared at the remains of yet another mess I had created. Water pooled around the dent and I imagined it seeping down into the sand below Two, giving life to something in need.
I rose and steadied myself with a hand against the shower wall when my knees threatened to buckle. I let the water run through my hair as I wondered what I had gotten myself into. Werewolves mated for life, but the girl who had stolen my heart was human. She wouldn’t feel the same pain at leaving me. I tried to convince myself that she cared, but the fact remained that she would be gone come morning, and Two would be an empty shell without her presence to fill it.