the edge of the office door.
“Boss?”
Robb didn’t bother to look up. He was staring listlessly at the blank computer screen in front of him. She called him again, this time by name and he seemed to snap out of it—but only a little.
“Hey Chrissy, sorry I didn’t hear you,” he murmured, rubbing his blood shot eyes. “What’s up?”
“I just swung by to grab my last check,” she started carefully.
He nodded to himself as he opened the top drawer of his desk and handed her a wad of cash. He didn’t even bother to count it.
“This is way more than I’m owed,” she began, but he cut her off.
“Just take it.”
Jane hesitated—her feelings were conflicted when it came to Robb. He’d been Dave’s best friend, a man she assumed could be no better than the one he claimed was like a brother...but Robb was good to her. He was generous and kind. She felt a pang of guilt at the sadness he was experiencing.
“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked.
He turned to stare at her with deadpan eyes. He aged quite a bit over the last few months. “I just keep asking myself the same question over and over again: How did I not know?”
Jane nodded in understanding as she took a few steps closer, “It wasn’t your fault, what happened.”
“I knew that girl,” he choked out suddenly as his eyes glazed over with unshed tears, “The one that he....”
Jane held her breath. Her feet were stuck to the floor.
“I mean, I didn’t know her personally, how could I? I was such a mess back then and she was only a kid...just a kid.” He buried his hands in his face in an attempt to block out a black hole of bad memories.
His anguish was heartfelt and it made Jane’s compassion towards the man increase exponentially. She pressed her cold hand against his back and rubbed gently as he broke down.
“I could have helped her, if I had known. I would have—“
“It’s the past. You can’t hold onto that,” she whispered. “Justice was served.”
“But not soon enough.”
She agreed with him there. “All you can do now is move on. Let go of him and stop blaming yourself—I’m sure she doesn’t,” Jane insisted.
Robb raised his gaze to hers once more. He looked into her eyes with thousands of questions bleeding through his own. “You know you’re wise for someone so young.”
“Sometimes we don’t get a choice. Sometimes we have to be.”
He nodded in understanding as he pulled himself together. “I’m gonna miss your pizza.”
She laughed, anything to fight away the emotion clawing to get out of her, “I’ll send you a pie from New York,” she joked, knowing she would never see him again. “Promise me something?”
He looked at her curiously but nodded in consent.
“Don’t let someone else’s actions define you. You know your truth, you’ve fought hard to get where you are. Don’t let the mistakes of those you trusted fall on your shoulders. You’re a good man and he didn’t deserve you.”
He was crying again then claiming they were tears of gratitude. Jane always thought that was a funny expression. People didn’t cry for any other reason than sadness—even if they didn’t realize it at the time.
She sighed as she wrapped her arms around Robb, who sobbed onto her shoulder. She was all too familiar with the sound of those grief-ridden tears—they were a childhood being put to death.