I think it is fairly safe to say that, had I known exactly what would be involved with having our son participating in the summer swim team, I might have encouraged him to take up a different sport. I’m pretty sure that even underwater basket weaving would have been preferable. That first season I felt myself in awe of and readily willing to bow down to all of the swimming families who I knew had been at it for many years. Every Saturday morning would find us up at the crack of dawn, bleary-eyed, clutching our coffee cups. We huddled together, ready to cheer on our kids for the entire minute or so that they were actually participating, while the rest of the time we ate snacks and sat around waiting for the next event. We would stand up and yell out our encouraging words like maniacs, all the while knowing full well that there was no way our kids could actually hear us when they were in the water. So basically we were just a bunch of parents cheering for the sake of each other in order to prove that despite our grumpy, early morning attitudes, we did, in fact, support and love our children.
By our second year we felt like we had graduated from our amateur status and saved our cheering for primarily those moments when the kids were standing on the starting block or just getting ready to touch the wall at the end of the event. As we became a bit quieter, we found ourselves experiencing a whole new side of the sport. You see, unlike other sports, when it comes to the mayhem of swim meets, you often feel like you are missing out on many of the nuances. There are so many kids and so many events and so many people coming and going that you feel fortunate if you actually manage to cheer for the right kid at the right time. Quieting down a bit not only saved our voices, it also allowed us to be more in tune with our surroundings.
It’s been said that comparison is the thief of joy. It robs us of the confidence we have in the truth that we were uniquely created by a loving God and put in our lane for a purpose.
One particularly hot Saturday morning it was all we could do to not jump in the water and swim alongside our kids in an effort to cool off. I found myself dreaming of drinking iced tea under a palm tree on a beach somewhere, but was quickly brought out of my reverie by shouting from my son’s coach. He stood at the end of the lanes cheering on the girls from our team competing in that event when suddenly I heard these words being yelled out: “Don’t look at the other lanes! It’s slowing you down! Focus on your lane!” I looked up in time to see one swimmer backstroking her way to the finish line but peeking every now and then to size up her competition. Every time those pink goggle–clad eyes glanced over at the swimmers in the lane next to her, she lost a little bit more ground. And sure enough, her fingers touched the wall just slightly behind the others.
It’s so hard to resist, isn’t it? That temptation to compare ourselves to those around us is always there. From the moment we are born, our vital statistics are put into a system by which we are then charted and compared to our peers. I’ll never forget bringing my newborn son to the pediatrician for the first time. I watched as he was weighed and measured and the numbers plugged into the computer. The doctor came into the room and showed me exactly how he stacked up against other newborn baby boys. Suddenly my precious, unique child, who I was so certain was the most incredible baby ever born, was reduced to a dot on a chart. Did he fall above the line, below the line, or exactly on the line? How did he rank? Which category did he fit into?
From scripture we know that this tendency to compare ourselves to each other has been a struggle throughout all of history. “But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding” (2 Corinthians 10:12 ESV). You see, when we compare ourselves to those around us, we allow them to define our worth. They become our barometer, our standard. And the things we see as our shortcomings are measured against their strengths. Every day we are slammed with opportunities to compare. There’s the mom in the carpool line who somehow manages to look chic in workout clothes while you, on the other hand, find yourself wearing whatever landed on the floor the previous night as you crawled into bed. There are those Facebook status updates showing the happy couple out on the town trying the latest restaurants while you are standing at the kitchen sink eating what’s left of the chicken nuggets on your child’s dinner plate.
Just like the swimmer on that hot Saturday morning, looking over to see how others are doing in their lanes only serves to slow us down in our own lane. It’s been said that comparison is the thief of joy. But I think it steals so much more than just our joy. I believe it robs us of the confidence we have in the truth that we were uniquely created by a loving God and put in our lane for a purpose. “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well” (Psalm 139:14 ESV). Playing the comparing game causes us to miss out on the opportunity to praise God for how He has created us. It’s virtually impossible to focus on our own finish line when we are constantly peeking over to check on the progress of those around us. But when our soul knows—really, really knows—just how wonderfully made we are, suddenly those other lanes begin to fade. And we can glide through the waters of life secure in the love of our heavenly Father.
Capture a memory from the beach with a framed monogram letter made with seashells collected from the sandy shoreline.
1 If your frame is unfinished, paint it in the color of your choice and allow to dry completely.
2 Cut a piece of burlap to fit the inside of the frame and secure in place with hot glue. Don’t worry about the edges being perfect because you will be covering them up in the next step.
3 Use twine or ribbon in the color of your choice and attach with hot glue to the edge of the frame being sure to overlap the burlap and cover the raw edges.
4 Decide on your letter and select your seashells. Arrange seashells in the shape of your letter and then secure in place with hot glue.
5 For a fun finishing touch, hot glue another seashell to the corner of the frame.
