“How ya doing?” Yoola greeted Rolo. She was short, energetic, and hard not to like.

“Hey Yoola! Hula Yoola … Uvula Yoola …” Rolo was trying to think of something funny to rhyme, but failing.

“Uvula?” she teased with a smirk, then gave him a big hug.

Smuffins bumped fists with Rolo. “What up, dawg?” He was Rolo’s best friend, a big guy for his age, already growing a wispy mustache. He always seemed to be scowling, which looked quite intimidating. But that was just how his face normally looked. Inside he was a warm softy.

“Hey, Smuffins, the muffin man!” said Rolo.

Smuffins approved with his scowly version of a smile. “Alright, that works, that works.”

Yoola and Smuffins were dressed in matching green tracksuits. They lived together across the street with the same owners.

Yoola pointed to Rolo’s harness. “Is that new?”

“Yeah, Zira took me shopping at the pet store yesterday.”

“Looks good.”

“Well …” Rolo shrugged.

“You don’t like it?”

“I woulda preferred the blue one.”

“Why didn’t you get it?”

“I dunno. She really liked this one.”

Smuffins chimed in. “Dude, you jus’ gotta tell her what you want.”

Rolo mocked, “This advice coming from a guy with a big pink bow?”

Indeed, Smuffins had a large pink bow on top of his hair, which certainly helped to soften his intimidating face. He shrugged. “I pick my battles. Besides, it makes my girl happy. She’s good to me.” He nodded at his owner sitting on the bench, a blorxlingette younger than Zira. She waved back at him enthusiastically.

Zira then jogged up to the group and greeted them in a sugary voice. “Well hello there, earthies! Found your little friend, huh?” She patted Yoola and Smuffins on their heads. “Rolo, do you need to go potty?”

He dropped his face into his hand in utter embarrassment and covered his eyes, as if no one else could see him that way. Through gritted teeth, he mumbled, “Zira! Go away. You’re embarrassing me!”

“Okay, fine. I’ll be back in a sec.” She attached his leash and tied the handle to the tree. “Have fun with your little friends. And be good!”

Rolo closed his eyes even tighter and grimaced.

Yoola chuckled as Zira jogged away. “You have such a cute owner.”

Another one of their friends, Fabli, strutted up behind them. He was the oldest of the group, in peak physical condition. His hair was long and wavy and dyed excessively blonde. His skin was tanned to a dark bronze, and his teeth somehow shined whiter than white. He was raised and groomed as a show earthling, and he always managed to slip his championship titles into any conversation.

“Hellooo,” he said in an exotic, suave accent.

Rolo said, “Hey, Fabli. Bobbly … nobbly …” Again, he couldn’t think of a good rhyme.

“Yo, Fabli!” cheered Yoola as she gave him a big hug.

“Hey, careful of de hair! I’ve got a big show tomorrow.”

“Oh wow, which one?” she asked.

“De Blorxminster Kennel Club. I’ve got a good shot at best-in-show dis year.”

Rolo was happy to be here at the park with his friends (despite his embarrassing owner). Even if they were merely chit-chatting, it was the first time in almost a week that he got to hang out with other earthlings—peers who understood him and talked to him as equals, not talking down to him the way blorxlings always did.

He asked Yoola, “So, what have you been up to?”

“Let’s see. On Blaturday we went on a walk. And on Blunday we went on a walk. Oh, and I switched to a new food, which is pretty exciting. So it’s been a pretty good week so far!”

“Nice,” he said, just to be polite. Her routine was as boring as his, yet she seemed content, even happy, which was puzzling to him.

Smuffins added, “And I got a new pet toy for my birthday. It’s one of those hover drones that shoots laser pointers. It’s pretty cool,” he bragged with a scowly grin.

Yoola teased, “I dunno about that. It looks dangerous to me. I don’t like going near that thing.”

“Nah, you jus’ jealous.”

“Ha! You just wish you had my automatic ball launcher!”

“Oh puh-lease. That thing’s not even close! No contest.”

Fabli changed the topic back to his competitions. “I’ve been doing my training, getting my agility times down for de show. And I went to de groomer today.” Somehow the breeze was always gently blowing through his flowing hair.

Yoola asked, “How about you, Rolo?”

“Oh, same ol’. Naps, snacks, the usual. I guess I shouldn’t complain. But, uh …” He hesitated. “Can I ask you all something? Like, don’t you ever wonder if maybe there’s something more?”

“More what?” Yoola asked.

“Like more we should be doing.”

Smuffins thought about this for a moment. “Like … car rides?”

“No, I mean, I dunno, more than just playing and being taken care of?”

Yoola looked perplexed. “What’s wrong with that?”

Rolo didn’t know how to answer that, so he just said, “Nothing.”

Fabli asked skeptically, “Are you on any new medications?”

“What else is there, dawg?” said Smuffins. “We’re safe, we’re healthy, we’re well fed. And they give us cool toys and we can chill all day. Nothing else we need, right?”

Rolo contemplated this, but it still didn’t feel right.

Yoola asked, “What’s the matter, Rolo? Is your body going through changes and now you’re having deep, philosophical thoughts?” She giggled.

He blushed and smiled. “Mmmaybee … But … don’t you ever wonder where we came from?”

“I came from a champion breeder,” boasted Fabli.

“No, before that. Like someplace earthlings lived in the wild, where we ran around hunting and taking care of ourselves?”

Yoola sneered in repulsion. “Like those packs of stray street earthlings? Outside?! Gross.”

Smuffins squinted at him. “You don’t hunt!”

“Well, no. Bad example,” Rolo admitted. “But maybe I would if I had the choice.”

Fabli tried to be helpful. “You could go into competitions.”

Rolo thought about how much exercise that would require—way too much.

“Dawg, I don’t know what you worrying about. Life has always been this good. We got it made! You should be happy with what you got.”

Rolo sighed. “I know I should, but …”

During all this talk, Rolo had unbuckled his harness to scratch an itch. Unfortunately, that got the attention of two robots patrolling the park: earthling catchers. They looked like military machines, painted tan with the “Animal Control Force” logo on their backs. They were much bigger than earthlings, about the size of blorxlings, but Private B-L1 was tall and thin, and Private B-D3 was short and squat. They rolled up to the group.

Private B-D3 confronted Rolo, speaking in a military staccato. “Earthling, civil code 473-dash-7 requires you to wear a harness or collar at all times in public.”

Private B-L1 commanded, “All of you, identify your owners now.”

Yoola, Smuffins, and Fabli each pointed to their owners. Rolo looked around for Zira while fumbling to re-buckle his harness.

B-L1 prodded him. “Where is your owner, earthling?”

“Um, she was just here, but I don’t see her—”

“Civil code 314-dash-9 requires earthlings to be under direct supervision of their owners or wranglers at all times in public.”

“Let’s see your identification tag.”

Nervously, Rolo pulled out the ID tag he wore around his neck.

B-L1 scanned it and looked up his records. “It says here your pet license is expired. Your owner needed to renew this on Bleptember 40th. And I see you’ve got a prior for chasing squirlers. And it says you were never neutered.”

“Neutered!” Rolo exclaimed with wide eyes.

“Civil code 518-dash-1.”

“That is a class 2 violation,” said B-L1. “Looks like we’re going to have to take you in now.”