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Friday morning Marc unlocked the door to the fitness center and Minnow asked, "Marc, hiring Tabby is one thing but don't you think giving her a key to this place was a little premature?"
He gave a snort of laughter. "Are you worried she'll sneak in at night and work out? Or help herself to a smoothie and not clean the blender? Oh, maybe she'll come and use the elliptical!"
"Don't be snotty. I'm just saying that we don't know her that well. Besides, why does she need a key? We'll be here during open hours."
He stopped and gave her a glare. "You're just grumpy because you had to sleep on that couch! What if I'm sick and you're visiting Jo? Someone has to let her in. It's not a big deal, Min. You ran her background, didn't you?"
"I'm still waiting for the results, moron," Min replied with a huff of annoyance. "And what I did on that couch couldn't be considered sleeping! It was a torture test."
Yesterday, Tabby, the perky blonde with a perky body and a perky smile had irritated her, but Minnow couldn't deny she knew her way around a pole. She had to elbow Marc in the ribs more than once as Tabby demonstrated her talents. Tabby even tamed it down when Minnow reminded her she would be teaching a class, not getting tips from drunk customers. After a short interview and filling out her job application, they agreed to hire her. Then Marc gave her a key and Minnow's mood tanked. She was still steaming about it when Marc reminded her that Mo expected a ride.
"Oh, shoot! I forgot. Send her a text and tell her I'm on the way, will you?" Minnow ran out the door without waiting for a reply.
When she returned with Mo, Marc had already been hard at work setting up video equipment. They'd rented TV's to play videos of the different of classes they offered. It hadn't taken long to realize showing the visitors a video of a yoga class was easier than trying to explain it. They would also run videos that came with the new workout equipment. Mo helped them arrange tables for Francine's catering and checked the supplies for the juice bar. Marc unloaded chairs they borrowed from the funeral home and these were placed near the television sets in hopes that the guests would watch.
Minnow outlined the catering menu, and Mo's eyes flicked to Marc. He avoided her gaze, confirming what Mo and likely everyone except Minnow already knew. Well, at least they would have a good turn out for the food if nothing else. Mo kept her mouth shut and let Minnow chatter about the grand opening when she dropped her off in Faultless later that day.
"I'll see you tomorrow," Mo smiled as she hopped out, happy to see Tony already at home.
"Will you need a ride in the morning?"
"No. Tony's bringing me," Mo promised.
***
When Marc rose early Saturday morning, he found Minnow had been awake for hours. Her snarled greeting as she hoarded her coffee cup and the mass of tangled brown hair suggested she hadn't spent a good night on the couch. The empty coffee pot was another not-so-subtle hint. While he made his own pot of coffee, Min left the kitchen muttering she had something important to do. He wandered to the living room with his cup of coffee to find the sofa cushions slashed and Min stabbing what was left of it like a maniacal psychopath.
He sat on a chair with a grin. "What happened? I thought the furniture was better than Elm Street."
"This sofa was designed by the devil and manufactured by his minions. It belongs on Hell Street and no one will ever be sacrificed on it again." Min turned with the butcher knife raised and blew at the long strands of hair over her eyes. It didn't help, so she crossed her eyes and blew again with the same results. Marc jumped up and took the knife away from her, afraid she'd use it next to remove the offending hair and then blame him. Min wiped the hair from her face and turned to him with a twitching eye. "I'm not done with Satan's sofa."
He looked over her shoulder. "Oh, yes, you are. How many cups of coffee have you had so far?" Minnow plus caffeine plus no food equaled a bad day for Marc. And they both needed to be at their best if they wanted to at least pretend the fitness center was the real reason they were in Sinful. Crabby Minnow plus Francine's catering plus the voluptuous Tabby was sure to end badly as well, so Marc parked her in a kitchen chair and made breakfast.
"Thank you, Marky," she said with a yawn when he set a plate in front of her. "I had two." He gave her a confused look, and she explained. "Coffee? I had two pots this morning, starting at three AM."
He choked on his own food and looked at the clock, doing mental calculations. An over stimulated Minnow... well, it was an amped up tale of woe. "Why don't you take a speed walk to work off some of that energy?" he asked.
She glared with bloodshot eyes. "I have no energy. That sofa sucked it out of me during the few hours I tossed on it for two nights."
"Then go work off the caffeine," he said firmly. "I think two pots of coffee can fuel you around the block. Or through the bayou."
She dragged herself up from the chair and patted his head. "You're a good little wife." Less than five minutes later she was ready for her morning outing. Usually Minnow jogged, but after that breakfast she followed Marc's advice and took a brisk walk. By the time she returned the grumpy Minnow vanished and civil Minnow returned. Marc had tidied the kitchen and was working on the mess she made in the living room, so she took a shower.
She came out drying her hair with a towel and he asked, "What are you going to tell Moses if she asks for her sofa?"
"I'm going to lie about what happened, tell her to pick out a new one, and expense it to the FBI," Minnow shrugged.
"First a stripper, now a sofa? I'm glad those are going on your expense report and not mine," he teased.
"That's the cost of doing business," she sniffed. "I'm not cheap."
"If I didn't know you had two pots of coffee running through your veins, I'd make the obvious response to that," he chuckled. "But I'm afraid you'd kick me down the stairs if I did."
"You can make any comment you like as long as I get the bed tonight."
"I don't think so. You just demolished the only other piece of furniture one could sleep on."
"That's a lie. Enjoy the chair," she suggested.
"Wrong again, Skinny Minnie. But now's not the time to argue about sleeping arrangements. We need to get to the fitness center."
Minnow looked at her watch with a shriek. "Leave the mess," she yelled to Marc. "I'll never hear the end of it if my sisters beat me there."
Even though they rushed, Jo still arrived ahead of them. Minnow gave a huff of disappointment. "Don't forget the early worm gets eaten," she reminded Jo, who laughed it off.
"Don't count on it," Ryan warned. "Jo's likely going to get the bird and the worm."
"Well, good for you Miss Never Tardy. Why don't you get those banners from the storage room? You and Ryan can start hanging them." Minnow was irritated because Jo beat her.
"Hey, Minnow? Would you prefer we start on the FAT or the FART side of the building?" Ryan asked.
"Jonah, do something with him," Minnow warned, "or I'll harness him to the treadmill and set it to eternal sprint."
"I take it back." Ryan ran for the storage room. Minnow was thin, but also fast and strong for her size. If she attacked first, she usually got the upper hand.
"Wimp," Marc teased.
"Darn right," Ryan admitted as he passed Marc with his arms full. "And don't pretend you're not because you've seen what those women can do."
A short time later Mo and Tony arrived. Tony looked as grumpy as Minnow felt, so Mo gave him a shove toward her and declared, "You two can work together." Then she and Jo giggled as neither Min nor Tony spoke.
"What's up with him?" Jo whispered to Mo.
"He told the neighbors we're married, and I told him I'm not lying to his neighbors." Mo batted her lashes playfully. "So he's wearing square wheels until we are."
Jo rolled her eyes. "Well, he's a man. You'd just better find someone to perform the ceremony soon, or he'll turn into a perpetually crabby man because he'll have those tires burned off in a hurry."
Mo agreed, but didn't tell Jo the plans for Sunday. She just prayed no one would find out. Being married by Shirlene Mooney wasn't something she was proud of, but she'd do it for Tony's sake. He planned to sneak over to the Mooneys later to settle the details of the ceremony.
Soon Tabby arrived as she would be doing live demonstrations for the visitors. The male hormones went into overdrive and even Tony's mood improved. Things went well until the food from Francine's began arriving. Everyone waited for Minnow to blow up, but before she could speak Tabby tossed a grenade at the already edgy Minnow.
"What kind of fitness instructor are you, ordering this kind of food? The kind that eats a box of doughnuts then harks them up?"
And then there were only three real players in the room- Tabby, Francine, and Minnow. Everyone else took a step back. Minnow inhaled a deep breath and prepared to shred Tabby, but Francine beat her to it.
"Listen up, missy! Around here we grow our boobs all natural and don't have them installed by a doctor. Our thighs aren't sucked out like a snotty nose and we don't have body parts lopped off like ugly warts. I don't serve non-food to fake people, and I refuse to cook 'low cal, low carb, low fat, no flavor and no reason to eat or live' food. I have a reputation and I guarantee it's a darn sight better than yours!"
Even Minnow didn't have anything to say after that. She nearly applauded because Francine put Tabby in her place. Minnow gloated as each incoming pan increased in unhealthy, but tastes so good ingredients because all she really saw was the peevish look on Tabby's face.
Fortunately, the influx of visitors began as soon as word spread that Francine's food was arriving at the fitness center. From that point things became too busy for Minnow to worry about Tabby. The Gaines kept busy answering questions and explaining the classes. Mo and Jo watched over the buffet line while most of the men watched Tabby's demonstrations.
Ida Belle and Gertie passed through the food line. Jo nodded a greeting and Mo asked, "Where's Fortune?"
"She had to leave town for a few days," Ida Belle replied. "She's arranging to have the rest of her belongings moved to Sinful."
"Well, I'm sorry she missed this," Mo said. "I bet she'd be good at teaching a self-defense class."
"Oh, are they looking for instructors?" Gertie asked. "Because I learned how to Hula dance from a native Hawaiian."
"Gertie, how many times do I have to tell you he wasn't Hawaiian? He was Portuguese and I doubt he ever learned to dance anything but drunk on his feet. Besides, no one wants to take Hula classes from you," Ida Belle told her as they moved down the line.
"And how do you know? Have you asked?" Gertie demanded. Ida Belle was out of range by the time she answered, but Mo chuckled at the outraged look on Gertie's face.
She gave Carter a smile and a quick wave as he was pushed through the line. His brows went up in a comical expression and she realized they hadn't talked for several days. In a way, his rash announcement that they were cousins was a blessing in disguise being the incentive Mo needed to make up her mind about moving to Faultless. It also cemented the bond of friendship they already had, making them feel more like siblings than cousins.
When there was a small break, Jo turned to Mo with a doubtful expression. "I think we're getting the short end of the stick here. Ryan and Tony need a turn, don't you think?
Mo smiled and went to stand near Tony as he watched Tabby and her tamed down show. She waited patiently as he continued watching. Suddenly, he jumped when he realized Mo watched him watch Tabby. His face turned red, then he tried to excuse himself.
"It's not my fault. Ryan dragged me over here."
Mo looked about. "I don't see Ryan. Wait, isn't he helping Jo with the food? I think he's been there about five minutes now. I guess Ryan's a smart man."
Tony grabbed her by the arm and dragged her away from the crowd. "And I'm a very desperate man."
"So you watch other women? Maybe you'd better see how Ryan wiggles his way out of these messes. 'Cuz I'm not buying it," she stated bluntly.
"Okay, I was killing time because you were busy. Why are you laughing? I don't think it's funny!"
"I do and I know Ryan doesn't squirm off the hook with pathetic excuses like that, but I'll let it slide because I know you have somewhere to be, right?" She cleared her throat and his eyes slid back from Tabby, who finished her demo, to Mo.
"Do you think you could learn to do that?" he asked.
She put her index finger under his chin. "Anthony? I already know how to do that," she replied. "And if you ever want to see it, you'll get out to the Mooneys and..."
Tony ran for the door and Mo shrugged. "And I'll go help Jo."