Oh my God! I can’t believe I just did what I did.
When I walked in Saint Mathew’s church I had no intentions of doing anything near what Wesley and I just did. I’ve never been to confession before. I’m not even catholic. But I figured now was a good time to confess what I’ve been doing at night for the last few weeks. I wasn’t sure if it would be Wesley or one of the other priests I would be confessing to. I knew though, if it was Wesley, the church’s rules would prevent him from confronting me in person about my transgressions. I wanted to tell someone, and I felt safe doing it this way.
But the moment I heard his voice on the other side of the screen, my thought process went the other way. To an even more sinful route. Everything I told him was the truth. I couldn’t stop thinking about him after I got home the night he caught me trying to sell myself. And once I knew Sam was asleep for the night, I found a spot away from him and let my mind run wild. The orgasm I had to thoughts of Wesley was the most intense orgasm I’d ever had in my life. Until fifteen minutes ago, at least.
As I rush down the street toward the building Sam and I are hiding in, I look down at my hand. The hand I used to touch myself in a confessional booth. With a priest on the other side. I was so wet, the tips of two of my fingers are still sticky.
I’ve never been so bold. And I never thought I would do such a thing. I don’t know what it is about Wesley, but he makes me do things I would have never done before. He drives me crazy with lust.
Spotting a corner store, I walk around to the back of it and find the water spigot. Turning the knob, I run water over my hands to wash away the evidence. No matter how clean I get my hands though, the image of me sitting there with my hand up my skirt and Wesley on the other side of the screen is seared in my brain. This new-found naughty side of me tells me I won’t be forgetting it anytime soon either.
Coming to the door of the building Sam and I are living in, I push it open and make my way up the steps. I told Sam earlier I was going out to find us some food. Guilt clutches my stomach because I’m coming back empty handed. My plan was to pilfer some food before I went to the church. Instead my feet led me to the church first, as if something was pulling me along. Sam and I ate the last of our food last night. I’ll have to go back out later to find something for him. I can go a day without food, but Sam needs to eat.
Before I make it to the door of the room we’re staying in, I hear Sam let out a belly laugh. It’s something I’ve never heard from him before. Or rather, it’s something I haven’t heard in years. Not since he was a toddler.
Stopping in the doorway, I lean against the frame and watch my little brother. He’s sitting with his legs crossed on the bed, a book set in front of him. A smile plays on my face as he reads one of the books I got him from the free bin at the library. From the humorous expression on his face, it must be the one filled with jokes.
Seeing the look on his face makes everything that’s happened over the last few weeks worth it. I’d do anything for Sam. Anything.
Sensing my presence, Sam looks up and spots me at the door. The smile doesn’t leave his face, and I give him my own smile as I walk across the room.
“I guess picking that book was a good choice?” I ask
“Yep. I’ve got a joke for you.” His grin grows. “What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?”
I sit down on the end of the mattress. “What’s that?”
“Anyone can roast beef, but no one can pee soup.”
He finishes the joke with another round of laughter, and I join in.
“That’s a good one!”
Once his laughter calms enough to talk, he goes for another.
“Why did Harry Potter go bald in his teens?”
“Uh, I don’t know.”
“Because he lost his Hedwig.”
I giggle and shake my head. “That’s just awful!”
His eyes crinkle with how big his grin is. “But it’s funny. What did the pencil say to the pen?” he asks.
I lift my shoulders in a shrug.
“I was Groot.”
My hand flies to my mouth, and my eyes widen in mock horror. “Oh my God. Poor Groot!”
He tells me a few more jokes, which has us both rolling around on the mattress in laughter.
A shuffling sound comes from over by the door, and I quickly sit up, my eyes flying in that direction. My jaw drops, along with my stomach, when I find Wesley standing in the doorway, his hands casually shoved into his pockets as he watches the two of us with a look of concern wrinkling his brows.
I jump to my feet and quickly make my way over to him. Grabbing him by the arm, I turn him away from Sam, whose wide eyes are firmly on the stranger.
“What are you doing here?” I hiss.
Wesley’s brows drop even lower. “I followed you.”
“Apparently,” I mutter, feeling like an idiot for not paying attention to my surroundings when I came into the building. How could I have been so careless? “Why?”
His eyes move back and forth between mine, the stunning grayness filled with questions. “Because I was concerned about you.” He looks over his shoulder toward Sam, and my stomach churns with dread. “And it’s obvious my concern was valid.” He looks back at me. “Who is he?”
I drop my hand from his arm and fold my arms over my chest, gripping each side of my dress tightly. Lifting my chin, I glare at him. “My brother.”
“What are you two doing here?”
I slam my mouth closed. Part of me wants to tell Wesley the truth. There’s something calming about him that makes me think he’s a man I could trust. But I can’t. It’s not just my life that would be put in jeopardy. Sam has been through enough already. I won’t risk him being put through more.
“That’s my business. Not yours,” I tell Wesley hotly.
His eyes do that assessing thing again before he speaks. “You can trust me, Jersey.”
I’m already shaking my head. “I don’t know you, so I don’t know if I can trust you. I won’t take that chance. There’s too much at stake.”
The muscles in his cheeks twitch, and from the look, it appears he’s not too pleased with my response. He’ll just have to get over it.
“Fine, you don’t have to tell me.” He steps closer, and it’s not until then I realize just how much bigger he is than me. I’m forced to tip my head way back to look at him. He lowers his voice. “But I want the two of you to come home with me.”
I lick my dry lips and shake my head again. “We can’t.”
Lifting a hand, he gently pries my arms loose then holds one of my hands. The way his fingers grip mine sends warmth up my arm. Are priests allowed to hold the hand of the opposite sex? The question is ludicrous, even to my own ears. Not even thirty minutes ago, this same priest was getting himself off in a confessional booth. Something tells me the rules no longer apply.
And that makes me feel guilty. I’m the one who lured this man off his righteous path. I should be condemned to hell.
“Please, Jersey. There’s no way I can leave the two of you here. It’s either come home with me, or I stay here with you. I promise you nothing will happen. I don’t know what’s going on, but no one will know you’re with me.” He squeezes my hand.
Unwisely, I take a moment to consider his offer. Food, warm water, and something soft to sleep on sounds really good right about now. I look over at Sam, who’s still sitting on the bed watching us with a wary expression, and take in his disheveled appearance. His clothes are filthy, and his face is smudged with dirt. Oil coats his hair, making it lay flat on his head.
I bring my eyes back to Wesley. I don’t know how much trouble he’ll be in for what we did during confession. Is he even still a priest? Just because he fell off the celibacy wagon, doesn’t mean he’s lost his religious values. I honestly don’t think he’ll tell anyone Sam and I are staying with him.
“Okay,” I say quietly.
The relief that appears on Wesley’s face makes me wonder why he cares so much. I mean, I get that he’s a priest and part of being one is caring for people, but this seems like so much more. The way he looks at me, even the night he almost caught me stealing food from his church, was more intense than simply a member of the clergy worrying over his flock. So what could it possibly be?
He smiles, causing a dimple to pop out on one of his cheeks. That little indent sends flutters to my stomach, and I’m reminded once again of what we were doing in his church not long ago.
“Go grab whatever you need. I’ll wait here.”
His voice shakes me out of my daydream, and I walk around him on shaky legs. I try to smile at Sam as I go to him.
“Who’s that man?” he asks, his eyes darting around me to look at Wesley.
“He’s a priest,” I tell him, getting down to my knees by the bed to start gathering the few belongings we have. Everything should fit into one backpack. “He’s going to let us stay with him for a few days.”
Sam throws the blanket off his legs and scoots to the edge of the mattress. “Are you sure he won’t tell on us?” I bring my eyes to him when I hear the fear in his tone. “I don’t want to go back, Jersey.”
I lean closer to him, keeping my voice low, but adding strength to my words. “You will never go back there, you hear me? I swear on my life, Sam. Nothing or no one will ever hurt you again.” I glance back over at Wesley before looking at Sam again. “Wesley is a friend who’s helping us for a few days. We’re still going to leave as soon as I get enough money.”
He chews on his cheek in a way that kids do when they’re nervous. After a moment, his head moves up and down. “Okay.”
“Grab your books and put them in here.” I hand him the backpack.
I get up and go over to the old desk that’s on the other side of the room. Pulling the bottom drawer all the way out, I shove my hand to the very back and grab the envelope I put there weeks ago. It’s all the money I’ve made so far working the streets. This, along with whatever else I manage to make, will get Sam and me out of town.
Noticing Sam struggling to get up from the mattress, I rush over to help him. Wesley beats me to it. He’s got Sam by both arms, gently helping him get to his feet. The gash on his leg is a lot better, but it’s still pretty sore. Putting weight on it is painful.
Wesley’s eyes drop to Sam’s leg. He can’t see the bandage because he’s wearing a pair of pants, but I know he doesn’t miss the way Sam wobbles and keeps his foot barely on the floor. Wesley looks at me in question, and I stubbornly shake my head.
His eyes narrow slightly, but he thankfully doesn’t question me on the matter.
“I’m Wesley. Or Father Adair if you prefer,” he introduces himself, his hand still on Sam’s arm to make sure he doesn’t fall.
Sam eyes him warily. “Sam.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Sam.” Bending down, Wesley grabs the backpack from the mattress and throws it over his shoulder. “Is this everything?”
“Yes.” I stuff the envelope of money in my dress pocket and move to Sam’s other side. Grabbing his arm, I put it over my shoulder. “We’re ready.”
Wesley's eyes move back down to Sam’s leg. “I can carry him,” he offers.
“No thanks,” Sam’s answer comes so fast that it almost makes me laugh.
Wesley jerks his chin up. “Suit yourself.”
He turns and walks toward the door, and Sam and I follow behind.