Chapter 19

Ella

Shutting the door of my suite, I gestured to the table on the other end of the room. “Help yourself.”

My room was a mirror copy of Jesse’s suite. I’d been a little bit—okay, a lot of bit—annoyed when we’d checked in. I seriously doubted any other crew member had a similarly luxurious room. Again. I knew for a fact that Harper and Wes were staying on a whole different floor. They’d both given me some b.s. line about needing to secure the whole floor the band was staying on. Why I’d been gifted—again—with the luxe suite while people way more important than me were in smaller rooms wasn’t a mystery. My brother was overstepping. Again.

We were going to have words when he came back from his city tour with Shay.

“You want any?” Jesse mumbled around his very full mouthful of burger.

I laughed. “No thank you. I had breakfast with Harper earlier. I’m good.”

He nodded and gobbled another huge bite.

There was something oddly charming about his lack of manners. Like it was proof that he really was just a regular guy. And maybe I was special because he was comfortable enough to be totally himself in front of me. But I was probably reading way too much into his actions. He was probably just that hungry.

But the way he ripped into that burger was just so primal. Like a barbarian who’d missed his last three meals and had hunted his kill himself.

He swallowed and licked his fingers with a lingering thoroughness that had me licking my lips in response. Did he treat everything he found tasty with that much attention? What would it be like to have all that attention and devotion focused on me?

My nipples tingled at the thought.

“Right.” Jesse popped a fry into his mouth then carefully wiped his hands on a cloth napkin. “So, I think we need to talk.”

All the heat that’d been coursing through my body froze at that phrase. We need to talk was never good. But hearing it from your crush/whatever-the-hell-we-were wasn’t good.

“Oh?” I replied shakily. My knees suddenly felt weak, so I sagged onto a plush chaise near the table Jesse was sitting at.

He turned in his seat and braced his hands on his knees. The man sprawl did seriously interesting things to his pants.

Not that I was looking or anything. Pay attention, Ella!

“Yeah, I know I was a shit last night. I’m sorry, Ella. I can’t remember most of what I’d said, but the bits and pieces I do remember aren’t great. I was an ass, no excuses.”

I practically sagged in relief. He wasn’t breaking up with me! Wait, were we even together for him to break us up? Ugh. I hated this whole no label bullshit, but this definitely wasn’t the time to hash that out. Hell, we hadn’t even slept together yet.

“Ella?” Jesse frowned at my distraction.

“Yeah no. I get it. You were in a bad headspace last night. Like I said, I understood and I accept your apology. But it can’t happen again. You don’t get to lash out at me because I’m the closest target. I don’t deserve that. Do it again, and I’m gone. I don’t give third chances.”

“Got it.” Jesse nodded tightly. “It wasn’t cool, and I’m gonna work on that.” He paused and took another deep breath. “I’m also not gonna be drinking like that anymore. Chase and I talked about it a few months back, and I know he’s made big steps. I promised to do the same, but I haven’t really held up my end. But I’m gonna work on it. I don’t think I need a program or rehab or anything. I’m just saying I know it’s a problem, and I’m gonna fix it. Along with the whole anger thing.”

“Right.” I curled my lips in and weighed what I said next. Fuck it. In for a penny… I tipped my head toward the cigarette tucked behind his ear. “What about those?”

“What?” Jesse frowned, clearly confused.

“The cigarettes. Since you’re giving up things, how about giving up the cigarettes too?”

He groaned and pulled the cigarette from behind his ear. Twirling it between his fingers, he stared down at the white stick. “Fuck. I don’t think I can do that.”

“You know, they make all these things to help you step down in use. Patches, gum, I think there’s even an inhaler. You can replace that safety cig behind your ear with a pen or something so you still have something to twirl. And you can replace your oral fixation with suckers or gum.”

Jesse stared at the cigarette in his hand like he was hypnotized by the way it felt between his fingers.

I bit my lip. “I’m just saying… Kissing an astray isn’t exactly sexy.”

“So, we’re talking about kissing again, huh?” Jesse looked up with a smirk, tossing his cigarette aside like he hadn’t been fondling it like a lover. “Now that I’m not hiding a groupie in my bathroom?”

I closed my eyes and cursed. “Yeah. I guess it’s my turn to apologize now. I’m sorry for what I said about you hiding a groupie in your room. It’s just hard to believe I’m enough when we haven’t even…”

“What?” Jesse’s smirk spread into a full grin.

“Don’t be a smartass. You know what.”

“I’m not in a hurry. You’ll be worth the wait.”

“What the hell are we waiting for? I was ready for you in high school!”

Jesse pushed up and prowled toward me like a panther, all lithe grace with predatory hunger shining in his eyes.

I held my breath and couldn’t ignore the thrill that pulsed through me.

This was it. Ten plus years of angst and longing and Jesse freaking Mala was coming to claim me. Finally.

He stopped in front of where I was still sitting sideways on the chaise, and he stepped between my legs, forcing me to splay my thighs. Bending down slightly, he tipped my chin up and stared intently into my eyes.

After the longest heartbeat known to man, he finally shook his head.

And my heart dropped. He didn’t want me.

“I don’t know what the hell you see when you look at me, but I seriously fucking hope I’m worthy of it one day.”

Jesse.” I shook my head. It ripped me up inside that he didn’t think he was worthy of me. Like I was above him. Me.

“I’m gonna do everything I can to make sure you don’t regret it. This. Me.”

I had a half a breath to brace myself. Then he was pressing his large body against mine and into the chaise behind me. His mouth came down over mine, and every single thought I had flew out of my brain.

His lips moved over mine with a mastery that had me tingling all over. And there was something about feeling the weight of his body on top of me that made my core pulse even hotter.

He devoured me. Like kissing me was the best thing ever. And I had to agree. Kissing Jesse was like nothing else. All heat and intensity. He took my lips like he’d die if he didn’t have me.

Me.

I wouldn’t believe it if it wasn’t literally happening right now. To me.

His hand cupped my cheek as he deepened the kiss. His tongue teasing mine and making me arch into his body still pressed above mine.

After an endless amount of kissing, he pulled back slightly and nuzzled my nose with his. The playful action had me smiling back at him even as my heart raced because of him.

“I feel like I have more to make up for. Like my apology for last night isn’t enough.” His eyes twinkled as he smirked at me. After pressing another quick kiss to my lips, he moved down my body. His broad shoulders easily urged my thighs further apart as he nestled between them.

I closed my eyes because the sight of him there was too fricking much. Then he tugged at the skirt of my sundress, pushing it up until my panties—which I hadn’t chosen with this moment in mind—were fully on display. I had to look down to remember which pair I’d put on this morning. White and lacy. Thank god.

Not that Jesse spent any time studying them. He ran a finger up the center of me, smirking at how wet I visibly was even through my panties. Then he gripped the tiny fabric in his hands.

Riiiip.

Fuck. That was hella hot. He’d literally ripped my panties in two. Elastic still circled my waist and legs, but the lace covering the rest of me was gone. I probably should’ve felt exposed or whatever, but I was having a hard time getting past what he’d just done. His display of strength—and need—was so fricking hot, there was probably a puddle under me now.

Jesse rumbled above me. “Fuck yeah. So fucking gorgeous.”

His finger ran up and down my lips. My very wet, very sensitive lips. I couldn’t help it; I arched into his hand.

He laughed slightly. “Someone’s a little eager, huh?”

I groaned. “Considering it’s only been my hand down there for the last year, uh, yeah.”

“A year?” Jesse’s thumb nudged my lips apart and easily found my clit. Not that it was exactly hiding. “Aw, sweet girl. We’re going to take care of that. Trust me.”

I wasn’t capable of thought, let alone speech.

His fingers danced along my outer lips, rubbing against my waxed skin. His calloused fingertips felt distinctly manly against my soft, sensitive flesh. And so freaking torturous. He dipped and skimmed and teased, never spending enough time where I wanted him.

I arched into his hand, trying to get him to stay where I needed his touch, but he sat back away from me.

“Let’s get these babies free,” Jesse said as he pushed up the skirt of my sundress.

“What? What are you talking about? What babies?”

“Your tits. I want to see them bobbing free above me while I’m busy down here. I love looking at your tits.”

“What tits?” I reached down and pulled my sundress off myself. Anything to get him back to work where I really needed him. If he didn’t hurry up, I was gonna finish on my own. “I don’t even wear a bra because I don’t have any tits.”

“Fuck yeah. That’s what I love about your tits.” He reached up and palmed my very small breast, his thumb abrading my sensitive nipple. “No bra ever. I love watching them move under your clothes. Your pointy nipples tenting your tops whenever I’m around. Showing me exactly how much you want me.”

He pushed up and suckled my left nipple into his mouth. I splayed my thighs wider and groaned at the sensation of his lips on me and his jeans pressing into my center. He moved over to my right nipple and his jean-clad erection pushed harder into me. I had to close my eyes as everything was suddenly too much.

“Mmm, there. Right there,” Jesse said after he pulled back. “You look like a fucking Botticelli painting. All flowing hair, pointy nipples, and lush round hips. Fuck.”

And for the first time in a long time, I felt it. The light coming from Jesse’s eyes and his seductive words made me feel like a sex siren. Like I was tempting Jesse into forbidden, naughty territory.

I smirked back at him. “You make me feel like Venus. What with me laying here all nude in front of my adoring audience.”

Jesse’s lips quirked. “I’ll show you an adoring audience.”

Then I gasped as he ducked back between my splayed thighs, his fingers and now tongue teasing my wet sex. His calloused fingers went back to play with my lips, drawing up and down their sensitive skin while his deft tongue caressed my aching clit.

“Oh god. Oh Jesse. I can’t, I don’t—” I broke off with a groan as he thrust a finger inside me. Hell, that had to’ve been two as they stretched me wide. “Oh wow. Oh, oh, oh.”

He started a driving rhythm, thrusting his fingers into me while his tongue flickered over my clit. And all I could do was widen my thighs and hold on for the ride. It was everything I wanted and more. That lovely grinding friction had me panting and arching into his touch.

Then his fingers curved and tapped at that spot inside me while his mouth did this suckling thing on my clit.

And I broke.

Waves of pleasure crashed over me, wracking my body with my orgasm. I might’ve screamed. I know I definitely cried.

And Jesse, the bastard, didn’t let up for one second. He continued to touch and suckle me until it was too much. I tried to roll away from him, but his body between my legs made that impossible.

“Too much.” I gasped. “I can’t, please!”

The bastard between my legs chuckled darkly before he finally relented, pulling his fingers free and resting his head on my thigh.

Even that was too much. His breath fanned over my too sensitive sex, and a wave of aftershocks shook my body.

I reached down and covered my pussy. “You gotta stop. You’re gonna liquefy my bones.”

“Fuck, I’d love to read that headline. Fucked to Death. Rock Star, Jesse Mala, Kills Partner With One Too Many Orgasms.”

I groaned even as a smile curved my lips. “You laugh, but you don’t know the pain. I thought for sure you were trying to kill me.”

Jesse rolled onto his side with a grunt. “I think these fucking jeans are strangling my dick.”

“Aww, poor killer rock star.” Totally comfortable with my nudity now, I sat up and pouted my lip at him. “Want some help with that?”

“Mmmm.” His eyebrows twitched then an unholy grin swept across his face. “Yeah actually I would. Lay back.”

“Wait, what?” That was so not the approach I thought he was going to take. “I’m not joking about how sensitive my pussy is right now. I really can’t—”

“That’s not the body part I’m interested in right now. Lay back.”

Frowning, I obeyed, sitting up with my back against the high part of the chaise.

“Nah, that’s not going to work.” Jesse stood up and pulled his shirt off.

I had like a second to appreciate the sculpted gorgeousness that was his pecs and abs before he bent and pushed his jeans down his legs. Then he was standing in front of me in only his black, tight boxer briefs that did absolutely nothing to hide his very impressive dick. Then he pushed the boxer briefs down.

Holy shit.

That was the monster Jesse wanted to put…somewhere in or near me?

“…okay?”

I blinked, and the whole room came back into focus. I hadn’t even realized I’d gotten tunnel vision.

Or that Jesse had been talking.

“What?”

He smirked like he knew exactly what I’d been so focused on. The joke was on him because no way was I letting him put that Coke can he had swinging between his legs anywhere near me.

“If you’d scootch down a couple of inches, I think we’ll be good to go.”

“Jesse, I don’t…that is, I won’t be able to get my mouth around that.”

He hitched a shoulder. “That’s okay. It’s not what I had in mind.”

I blinked. “Uh, okay.”

I moved a little bit down the chaise and sucked in a breath when Jesse swung his leg over my body and stood over me. His dick looked even more imposing above me. He ran a fist up and down his length, and I’m not ashamed to admit my mouth watered at the sight. It really was the prettiest dick I’d ever seen in person.

“All I’m going to need is those pretty little tits of yours.” He came down on his knees, still straddling my body, so his dick lined up in the vast valley between my tiny breasts.

“Pretty sure this works better with more well-endowed women,” I muttered as I stared down the barrel of his barrel. If anything, his huge dick made my breasts look even smaller.

Why did that look so hot?

I licked my lips, imagining trying to give him a blow job. Screw it. As long as he wasn’t an asshole, that would be fun. Hot even.

Jesse ran his hand over his dick.

“Christ, sweet girl. You look so fucking sexy with those nipples pointing up at me.” He let go of his cock to twist and pull at my nipples. Then he paused. “Shit, I forgot about lube. Give me a sec.”

He vaulted over my body like an Olympic huddler, and I didn’t mind watching him go. His taut ass flexed with his steps like a freaking work of art. Michelangelo should’ve sculpted Jesse. He definitely would’ve looked more impressive downstairs than the original.

In seconds, Jesse was back with a little tube of lotion. He straddled my body again and spread the flowery scented white lotion all over my chest.

“Fuck me. In a few minutes it’ll be me painting your tits white.” He ran his softer fingers over my nipples, squeezing and plucking at the distended nubs.

I felt an answering pang between my thighs. I would’ve thought my poor aching pussy was done with orgasms for the day—hell, month—but she was a thirsty bitch. I groaned and moved restlessly under Jesse’s hulking figure.

“Oh yeah. I knew you’d want more.” He smiled arrogantly down at me. “If we had the time, I’d make you beg before I fucked you. But we definitely don’t have enough time for me to fuck you properly. You’re going to have to wait until tonight. All needy and wet. Fucking aching for me. Let me hear you, sweet girl. What do you want? You want this dick?”

I moaned as his dirty talk just made me wetter. My sex fluttered like it could feel the thrusts Jesse made against my chest. I wanted to touch myself, give my pussy a little relief, but the way he knelt over me made that impossible.

I just had to lay here and watch him pleasure himself.

It was the hottest fricking thing I’d ever done. And I was just a spectator.

“You’ve been teasing me so fucking long. Watching that ass bounce under those fucking skirts. I can’t wait until I get to watch it bounce under me. And these fucking tits. All pointy and naughty. Just begging for my mouth.”

I couldn’t take it. Watching him, listening to him. I had to do something.

Craning my head forward, I caught the tip of his dick on his next thrust with my lips. He thrusted again, and I licked the head. It was salty and so fucking masculine.

“That’s right, sweet girl. Lick me. Lick that dick. Give me a little more.”

His dirty talk washed over me. I was fixated on the sight of his dick thrusting toward me.

The next thing I knew I heard a thwap and felt a sting on my pussy.

Jesse had reached behind him with his right hand and spanked my pussy.

Jesus. Why was that so fucking hot?

I sucked and licked at anything that came near me.

Thwap, thwap, thwap

“Christ. So fucking good. And all mine. Not gonna give you up. Gonna fucking chain you to my bed and make you give me that mouth anytime I want. So fucking sweet. Let me see those green eyes, sweet girl. Look at me.”

I looked up at Jesse. He grunted as sweat ran down the side of his face.

Thwap, thwap

And I broke.

But so did Jesse. As my body shuddered beneath him, he painted ribbons of white cum all over my chest and neck. The warm stripes felt like validation. Jesse wanted me. Jesse found value in me. I was enough. I was so freaking hot that he didn’t even need to fuck me to come. He just had to look at me and thumb my nipples, and I’d made him come.

Despite the fact that I was literally underneath him at the moment, I had all the power.

When I finally had control of my body again, I grinned wickedly as I ran a finger through the mess covering me. I couldn’t wait to see where we went from here.

Jesse groaned from his sprawl on the end of the bed. “I can’t feel my knees.”

“Do you usually feel your knees?”

He snorted a laugh and scrubbed his hands over his face. “Fuck me. I can’t remember.”

I giggled along with him.

We weren’t touching, and I felt closer to him than ever before.

In the distance, my phone chimed with an alarm.

Now it was my turn to groan.

“What’s that for?” Jesse asked.

“It’s a reminder to put a bra on because we have to be at the media call in twenty minutes.”

“Perfect. That’s just enough time for me to make sure we get all dirty spots on you squeaky clean.”

My frown quickly turned into a grin.

And I might’ve raced him to the bathroom.