After the concert, the mood backstage was weird. Everyone was looking at me. Like full on craning their necks when I walked by. And I caught more than a few of them staring at my crotch. What the fuck was going on?
I darted into our private greenroom to make sure everything was all right. But my zipper was up, and I couldn’t see any stains or anything on my pants. Weird.
“Why would you do this?” Rowan all but screamed at me.
I jerked my head up from my zipper inspection as the door bounced off the wall and Rowan came tearing into the greenroom. “Huh? What’s going on?”
“Are you fucked in the head or something? I don’t give a shit if you wanna sabotage your relationship or whatever, but how dare you use me to do it!” Black streaks of mascara coursed down Rowan’s cheeks, and her eyes were blazing red like she’d been crying. A lot.
I didn’t like seeing any woman crying, but I still didn’t know what she was accusing me of. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“You son of a bitch!” Chase roared from the doorway.
The next thing I knew something slammed into the side of my face, and I went down. Again.
“She fucking loves you! And you do this to her?” Chase roared above me.
Wham
I couldn’t even tell which way was up. All I knew was pain and confusion.
“Motherfucker!” Chase spit out. “I knew you’d do something like this!”
Wham
“What the hell?” I grunted as his fist slammed into my ribs.
I bucked, trying to toss him off me, but he wouldn’t move.
So I slammed my fists into any part of him I could reach. “I didn’t do shit.”
“You’re the biggest asshole I’ve ever met.” Spittle from Chase’s words fell down on me. “You know that, asshole? I knew you’d do this. I knew!”
“Chase! Get off him!” Wes yelled nearby.
I didn’t let up. I kept punching him back.
“Fuck!” Wes yelled. “Security! Security!”
Someone grabbed Chase and hauled him off me. I rolled to my side, hacking up a lung. Pain coursed through my body with every breath. Between this morning and just now, Chase had done some serious pain to my ribs. Maybe broke one or two? Fuck.
Blinking against the sweat running down my face, I rolled to my knees and looked up. Four security guards stood between me and Chase, who Wes had pressed against the far wall, talking close into his face and pointing his finger. Xander stood next to Rowan, shaking his head, looking all disappointed while Noah stared at his cell phone screen with his eyebrows up into his hairline. Nice to know our little show was that boring to him.
“All right!” Wes kept a hand on Chase’s shoulder and turned to address the room. “I think we have it in hand now. Thanks, guys.”
The security guards traded a couple looks then shrugged and filed out. Xander followed to close the door behind them.
Leaving me in the room with my band, Wes, and Rowan.
Pushing myself upright, I swayed on my feet for a second as my head swam. “Someone wanna tell me what the fuck is going on?”
“He doesn’t know?” Wes asked.
“Does it sound like I know?” I all but yelled. “Rowan was in the middle of accusing me of something I still don’t understand when this asshole came out of nowhere and sucker punched me. Again.”
“Our sex tape is online,” Rowan’s voice rang through the room. “It’s all over social media.”
I blinked. “What sex tape?”
“Are you fucking serious, man!” Chase yelled. Wes jumped between us, bracing his hands against Chase’s shoulders and pressing him back. “I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Video of you two fucking is all over the internet. Everyone’s seen it. Everyone.”
My stomach lurched as my wooziness multiplied. My naked ass and dick were on the internet? What? Why?
And then it clicked.
Rowan’s jealousy. Her obvious attempts to get me back.
“What the fuck?” I turned to Rowan, incensed. “Why the fuck would you post that shit? You seriously think that’s going to get me to come back to you? What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Me?” Rowan pressed a hand against her chest. “I didn’t post it. I don’t want to be all over the internet like that.”
“How could you do that to my sister?” Chase yelled at me. “She fucking loves you, and you’re screwing around on her already? And you’re recording it? What the fuck!”
I raised my palms. “It’s an old video! I swear!”
“Fuck you. Like I believe that.” Chase sneered. “I know a fucking guilty face when I see one. And you’ve been guilty since day one. You’re a shitty, shitty friend. Ex friend, asshole.”
I shook my head and opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I turned to Rowan, but she smirked at me, clearly not interested in coming to my defense.
If Chase thought that about me, Ella would too. Fuck.
I didn’t cheat on her. I would never cheat on her. But how did I prove a negative? Especially when the one person who could say something in my defense wouldn’t.
Shit.
Shit.
Noah raised his hand. “It’s an old tape. From before this tour. Before last tour too, come to think of it.”
We all blinked at him.
“How the hell would you know that?” Chase asked. “Were you fucking in on it or something?”
“Bleh.” Noah’s nose wrinkled. “I know it’s an old video because Jesse didn’t have his unicorn ass tattoo in it.”
We all blinked at him again.
“What?” Noah raised his palms. “So I watched it. Big deal.”
Wes laughed, shaking his head.
“That’s fucked up, Noah.” Xander scoffed.
Noah shrugged. “Like you weren’t curious.”
“Doesn’t mean I wanna see any of your naked asses. Especially if they’re thrusting and your dick is—” Xander broke off, shuddering.
Noah shrugged and turned to me. “You have some serious game. Respect.”
I didn’t even know what to say to that. I blinked a couple of times then turned to Wes. “Right, if we’re done here, I have some damage control to take care of with my girl. Can you arrange a car for me?”
“I’m not done with him!” Rowan screeched. “I wanna know how the tape got out! Who’d you share it with? Who did you send it to?”
“I haven’t looked at that thing since you sent it to me.” I shook my head then swayed as the movement fucked with my equilibrium. “I didn’t save it. I didn’t send it to anyone. For all I know, you’re the one who put it out there.”
“Which I believe would be in violation of the NDA you signed.” Wes raised his eyebrows.
“I didn’t do this!” Rowan shrieked.
I smirked at Rowan. “Kinda hard to prove a negative, especially when no one will help you, isn’t it?”
She scowled back at me. “This is bullshit. I wanna know who’s responsible! I’m not going to take this lying down!”
“You don’t have to tell us.” Noah nodded. “We all know you prefer girl on top.”
“Oh fuck you, Noah.” Rowan stomped over to the door Xander was still leaning against and shoved her sharp talons into his chest. “Move! Get out of my way.”
Xander shook his head. “No, wait.” He turned his head to Noah. “That was fucked up. We’re not doing that kinda bullshit on my watch. Apologize to the lady.”
Noah scoffed, but when Xander’s firm expression didn’t change Noah rolled his eyes. “Fine. I’m sorry, Rowan. I won’t sex shame you again.” He waited a beat. “We good?”
Rowan rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Can I leave now?”
“We’re going to get to the bottom of this, Rowan,” Wes said from the other side of the room. “Tyler is on his way from LA, and I know he’s got people already working on DMCA take down notices. We’ll fix this the best we can.”
“You can’t unring this bell.” Tears welled in Rowan’s eyes. “Everyone’s seen it, and it’s only a matter of time before someone puts my name on it too.”
“I’m sorry, Rowan.” The words felt meaningless in the face of her obvious pain.
I didn’t know how this had happened, but now I honestly believed she didn’t do it. And despite our issues, I didn’t want to see her hurt. She might’ve been a bitch, but no one deserved this shitstorm.
I remembered the way everyone had been watching me backstage after the concert ended. Their eyes on me. Looking at my crotch. Picturing me naked. Fuck. I’d have to go the rest of my life with everyone having the knowledge of what I looked like nude. Having sex. The sounds I made. My skin crawled and bile tickled the back of my throat. Violated didn’t even come close to covering what it felt like.
I definitely didn’t want to go through this either.
Rowan shook her head and wiped at her wet eyes.
“If it helps any—”
“Noah!” we all yelled at him.
“What?” His shoulders went up. “All I was going to say was that her face isn’t in the video at all. There’s no way for anyone to say for sure that it’s her in the video.”
Rowan smiled weakly. “Thanks, Noah.”
“No problem.” He shrugged a shoulder then swiped at his nose. “And I’m sorry I’m an ass sometimes. I tend to think without speaking. Wait, flip that.”
“You can take some time if you need it, Rowan,” Wes added. “We get that this is a lot. So take all the time you need. With pay, of course.”
“Thanks.” Rowan looked down at her boots. “I’ll let Harper know if I need time off.” Then she slipped out the door after Xander pulled it open.
He closed the door again then turned to face us. “So where are you at, Chase? You going to jump Jesse the second our backs are turned? Again? Because this is turning into a dangerous and annoying hobby of yours.”
Chase slumped against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. “I still don’t like the thought of him with my sister.”
Noah snorted a laugh. “Especially now that you can probably picture it with the whole video leak and everything.”
“Fucking hell.” I rubbed a hand over my face and heard a distant smack.
“Ow,” Noah whined.
I didn’t care who’d smacked him, but I appreciated it all the same.
It was gonna be awesome to have those little jokes at my expense for the rest of my life. Fucking hell.
“But yeah.” Chase sighed. “I guess we’re good.”
“What?”
Chase shrugged. “I’m not gonna lie—it’s gonna take me a minute to get totally okay with you and my sister being together. You’re not who I thought she’d end up with. I never would’ve chosen you for her.”
“Pretty sure you made that clear with beatdown number two.” Noah laughed into his hand.
I flipped him off without even looking at the asshole. “You’re gonna be the one at the end of a beatdown if you don’t shut your pie hole, No.”
“Noted,” Noah muttered. “Geez, it’s like none of you can take a joke lately.”
“Because it’s not a fucking joke!” Xander yelled. “Jesse had his privacy violated. He’s going to have to deal with that the rest of his life. And Chase walked in on something no one should ever have to see their sister doing. Try to have some fucking empathy for a change, asshole.”
“Hey, I’m just trying to lighten the mood.” Noah held out his palms then gestured wildly. “You all are walking around with clouds over your heads like the world is going to end. It’s not like we didn’t all know that Ella has sex, or Jesse for that matter. It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Wow.” I shook my head. “I don’t have time for this bullshit. I gotta get to Ella. She’s probably freaking out. I gotta make this right with her. Somehow.”
“Wait a second, Jess.” Chase turned to Noah. “Do you seriously not get that it is that big of a deal? For the rest of his life, every time someone mentions him or us in the media, it’ll drag this tape back up. Everyone is gonna watch it. Everyone is gonna have an opinion about it. Ella is going to have to deal with it for the rest of her life—or as long as she’s dumb enough to be with this dickwad.”
“Thanks, bro.” I laughed lightly, shaking my head.
“No problem.” Chase hitched his chin at me. “And we’re square. You guys are right. I need to start treating Ella like an adult. If she’s picked you, I guess that’s all right with me. And it helps that I have a new target to take out all this pent-up aggression on.”
We all waited a beat, not getting what target Chase was talking about.
“Noah. I’m talking about Noah,” Chase all but yelled. “If he doesn’t get his head out of his ass about this sex tape, I’m gonna tear him a new one. I got your back, Jess.”
I laughed. “Clearly. And apparently Noah’s too.”
Noah cupped his hands over his ass. “Not funny, assholes.”
“Come on.” Chase crossed the room and clapped my shoulder. “Let’s get you to your girl. I think a show of unity is exactly what this moment needs.”
“But groupies…” Noah whined.
Chase swiveled around to glare at Noah. “New asshole coming your way in five…four…”
Noah shoved past Xander to bolt out of the room with Chase close on his heels.