Preface

ALTHOUGH IT SOUNDS LIKE A B MOVIE, our story began in the summer of 1968, at the top of the Empire State Building. I was visiting New York with two girlfriends from Minnesota, and Michael was there with several of his seminary high-school friends from Ohio. Our faces were smooth with youthful anticipation, our lives fairly uncomplicated. We felt an instant connection, and I came home and announced to my best friend, “I met the man I know I could happily marry.” Then he went off to march in the Vietnam War and I marched against it but our friendship remained unshakable; our correspondence honest and constant. Meanwhile, I married someone else, gave birth to a beautiful daughter, and later divorced. When Michael moved to Minnesota in 1973, I finally married my soul mate. He adopted Jessica, and we became an “official” family. I soon discovered, however, that when I married Michael, I also married Vietnam and the trauma he carried from his combat experience.

This book is about our journey and the journeys of others who, like us, have learned to live with the challenges and scars of trauma and the “shock wave” effects of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). While our family’s trauma stemmed from war, there are many other causes for trauma, from physical and sexual abuse and violence, to economic and natural disasters, serious accidents, sudden deaths, and terrorist attacks. As my family learned, when trauma affects a loved one, it affects the entire family.

Shock Waves is especially for those who, in their efforts to understand and care for their traumatized love one, discover they need care and understanding themselves. Shock Waves is a story of healing and healers. Most important, it is a story of hope.