Chapter Fifteen

 

Who was Jesse talking to? And more importantly, why did he scamper off and disappear when the call came in?

While I waited for him to return, I finished a thick slice of French toast and peeled an orange. I’d even managed to top up my coffee and add a drizzle of milk to it.

Finally, Jesse made his way back into the kitchen, a satisfied smile on his face. He cut into his breakfast and popped a piece into his mouth, chewing slowly and letting a deep moan escape. “This is very tasty.”

“I’ll leave the recipe for you.” My voice was curt, surprising me as the tone rolled out.

Yes, I was having feelings for Jesse, and judging by the way he kissed me, he was too, so the hey honey phone call really rubbed me the wrong way.

“You okay?”

I took a sip of coffee. “I’m going to level with you. I really enjoy your company.”

He reached beyond the fruit basket and held my hand. “And I enjoy yours. These last couple of days have been amazing.”

“They have been, yes.” It was hard to disagree. “Which makes things difficult.”

“How so?”

“I’m going home in two days.”

“So?” He stabbed another piece and popped it into his mouth.

I ripped the orange peel into tiny fragments, unsure of where I was taking this conversation. Or even what the end result would be. “I’ve shared more with you than I have anyone else in a long time.”

“Is this about trust?”

Was it? Maybe.

“Let me stop you right there and explain the phone call, before things get taken out of hand.” A grin pushed up the corners of his mouth, showing the hint of a dimple. “I trust you. I’ve let you in my house, and where I may have been a little hesitant about seeing us grow, I’ve mostly let you into my heart. And after all Jenna did to me, that’s a start. A huge start.” He sighed and cast his gaze down. “But I’m holding something back.”

As his shoulders rolled in, my heart ached.

“Jenna left and moved back to the city. Remember when I mentioned how she got what she wanted and left?”

I nodded, reflecting on the conversation in the diner. Something about her parents not liking him, and constantly asking if they were pregnant. My eyes widened at the thought, and I searched out Jesse’s. I didn’t want to presume a thing, so I waited.

“When Jenna left, she was pregnant. She was ten weeks along when she moved into her parent’s basement, and she hadn’t yet told me. But her parents sure knew.” A lacing of vitriol weaved through his words. He shook his head. “She didn’t tell me until after her ultrasound when she found out the sex of our child. I wasn’t even there when she gave birth.”

I couldn’t imagine having a child I couldn’t see all the time. The constant heartache that would cause would be unmeasurable. And I also couldn’t imagine taking the child away and not having a family. If I had gotten pregnant with Charlie’s baby, he’d know. At least I’d like to think I’d tell him.

“What do you have?”

A twinkle returned to light up his eyes. “A daughter, Sarah. She’s eighteen months old and quite the chatty little one. Looks just like her mother. That’s who I was talking too.”

He pulled out his phone and when it faced me, there was a little cherub of a face with dark eyes and hair. I saw Jesse in her features, but then again, I had no idea what Jenna looked like.

“She’s cute, but I think she looks like you.”

He stared at his phone. “You think so?” It deepened the smile.

“I do.”

“That night when I came across you on the highway, I was just coming home from seeing her. Jenna and I agreed she’s too young to spend the weekend away, so I go to her.”

I nodded, an intense dislike of his ex-wife forming in my gut. She maybe got all she wanted, but clearly, not ethically. “How often do you see Sarah?”

He stared at the picture before turning it off and pocketing it. “Not as often as I’d like, that’s for sure. But one weekend a month, I stay with friends and spend as much time with her. And I facetime Sarah all the time.”

“That’s great.”

He squeezed my hand. “I’m sorry I kept it from you. But how do you tell someone you have a child that doesn’t live with you? Even people around here don’t know.”

“I completely understand. Really, I get it.” And I did.

Already, because of his job, he was a bit of an odd duck, and to think he has a child with the wife who hated this town. As I rolled the situation around in my head, his financial situation became even more clear. He likely paid a hefty parental support, which ate up his income, even though he didn’t get to be a full-time father. Sometimes the system wasn’t right.

“What about a job there?”

“I’ve thought about that, several times over. But the cost of living is much higher than here since this place is paid off. If I sold it, it still wouldn’t be enough to get a decent down payment on a place there. Even an apartment would eat away my income.”

Jenna really screwed him over and my heart went out to him. There had to be other options, however, I was sure Jesse had thought them all through.

“Well, someday when she’s older, I hope she’ll be here for the holidays, and you can do all the fun things with her that we did together.”

“That’s the dream.”

“It’ll happen.” I believed it and walked over to park myself between his legs when he turned to face me. My heart beat ultra fast as I hovered over him. Seeing the sadness on his face broke me a little, and I wanted to see that sweet smile and know I was responsible for putting it there. “I’m sorry things between you and Jenna didn’t work out.” I leaned my forearms on his strong shoulders. “But she lost out. Big time.” My fingertips swirled on the back of his neck and I inhaled his fresh scent. “However, you’re all mine to claim.” I brushed my lips over his, taunting and teasingly.

His mouth parted and I dove in, exploring and tasting, all the while giving my heart to this wonderful man. As his hands gripped tighter around my waist, I wanted more. More of Jesse. More of his kiss. I wanted to explore everything he’d give me. And it was something I could do. All my life, I’d never taken chances – on anything. But this?

“I need you, Jesse.”

“I need you too.”

The sweetest words I’d ever heard. How wonderful it felt to be needed.

“I know it sounds crazy and risky, like wildly unsettled, but I’ve never been so sure of something in my life.” And that truth set me free. Suddenly my future didn’t seem so dismal and grey, picturing Jesse in it gave it life and colour.

He stared into the depths of my eyes. “What becomes of us now? What happens after the wedding?”

My shoulders lifted in defeat, but I couldn’t stop the blossoming smile from spreading across my face. “I honestly don’t know, but we’ll find a way to make it work. Maybe I find a job here.” I tapped the paper for good measure.

“Maybe I do make the move to the city.” It wasn’t said though with the best of intentions. More like a last resort.

I cupped his face and straddled his thighs. “I believe in us, of what’s growing between us, more than I’ve believed in much of anything lately.”

“Even with all my baggage?”

I laughed. “My luggage is way bigger than yours and if you can so easily accept me with mine, yours will be a walk in the park.”

“So, we’re really going to do this?” His eyes sparkled like a kid in the candy store, all lit up with endless possibilities.

“I’m in, if you are.” I snuggled closer to him ensuring not a gap of air separated us.

“I’m all in.” A smile cracked his whiskery face. “Merry Christmas, Mona.”

My gaze danced between his eyes. “Merry Christmas. This has been the best one ever.”

I leaned forward and delicately touched my lips to his while cupping his perfect face and inhaling his sultry scent. I tipped my head and the moment his lips claimed mine, my body surrendered to his touch, knowing it was safe within his arms.

Mom’s final written words lit up like a neon sign. This is what she wanted for me. This is what I never had with Charlie. Never once. My heart knew what was important. It knew who was important.