“YEAH, BABY!” BRIAN hollered from the bedroom. Laura was in the kitchen, helping Janet chop bell peppers for the gumbo while Rob was preparing the sausage. The three of them looked up from their tasks as Brian hobbled into the kitchen on his crutches, beaming.
Laura felt herself smiling back. Brian had just called Coach Perkins to update him on his recovery, and based on his response, it had to have been good news.
“What’d he say?” Janet asked excitedly, moving toward her son.
“I get to keep my scholarship, and they’re gonna work with me on physical therapy this year!” Brian exclaimed. “They want me to come back to Baton Rouge as soon as I can so we can get started. Coach said I can train with the team, and if everything’s good, I should be back starting the year after—maybe even sooner.” He grabbed a piece of the pepper off of Laura’s cutting board and threw it in his mouth, then kissed her on the cheek.
“That’s amazing!” Laura cried. A sense of relief rushed over her, as well as gratitude. They’d been through hell this year: moving back to Toulouse, living with Janet and Rob, losing all their money. But they’d done it all for this moment, when Brian could return to the team with the hopes of getting back on the field and leading the Tigers once more.
Janet crossed her arms, looking worried. “You’re not gonna jump into training too fast, are you? I don’t think you’re supposed to put that kind of pressure on it for a while.”
“Don’t worry, Mom,” Brian said. “They won’t make me do anything too major for a while.” He paused. “I can’t believe they’re actually taking me back!”
“So proud of you, son,” Rob said.
Laura walked over to Brian and gave him a hug, nuzzling her face into his light blue polo shirt. “I’m really happy for you.”
But even as the words came out of her mouth, contradictory thoughts spun through her mind. The idea of moving back to Baton Rouge with Brian worried her. Sure, she could apply for LSU’s spring semester, but she wondered if they moved back, would she go back to waitressing at the coffeehouse again, doing her husband’s homework at night, and spending game days hearing people talk about all the great things he was doing with his life?
The real question was, what was she doing with hers?
• • •
“YOUR HUSBAND IS the man,” Kenny said to Laura as he opened his front door and gave Brian a one-armed hug.
Laura squeezed past them and entered the cozy front room of his parents’ camp at Mossy Pointe, a small man-made beach twenty miles from Toulouse. Kenny had it for the weekend and was hosting a party to celebrate his best friend’s successful surgery.
“Where should I put these?” She held up a bag of tortilla chips and a medium plastic container filled with homemade cowboy caviar.
“Ooh, what’s this?” Kenny asked, lifting the lid and greedily eyeing the mixture of black-eyed peas, tomatoes, corn, and avocado. He looked up at her, worry flitting across his face. “Did you make this?”
Brian answered for her. “Don’t worry, man—it’s a Janet Landry contribution.” Laura rolled her eyes. Kenny had experienced one of her cooking mishaps a couple of years back—she had made Brian a yellow cake with chocolate frosting for his seventeenth birthday, and everyone at the party realized within the first bite that she had used baking soda instead of baking powder.
“I’ll just put these in the kitchen,” she said, flashing a polite smile.
The guys followed her, and Kenny threw Brian a beer from the fridge.
“Should you be drinking with the painkillers?” Laura whispered in his ear as he cracked open the can. She wanted to remind him that he’d promised to stop drinking entirely, but held her tongue. After all, this was a celebration.
“Nah, I’m good,” Brian said with a laugh. “I didn’t take any today—knew I was coming here.”
As people started arriving, remarking over Brian’s surgery and congratulating him on being back on the team, Laura snuck outside to get some fresh air and set up for the party. She covered the long picnic table out back with old issues of the Toulouse Town Talk and set three rolls of paper towels on top. Through cabin windows, Laura watched everyone huddle around Brian, focused in on his every word. She wondered if he was telling them that he couldn’t have done any of this without her; how she’d helped save money for him before he lost it; how it was her idea to file the appeal for the insurance; how she missed four days of school to be by his side at the hospital in New Orleans. And if he wasn’t saying it out loud, did he at least appreciate it?
As Laura was putting the plastic forks and knives in a mason jar, everyone finally started coming outside. She looked up to see Claire and Gabby in the crowd.
“Hey, girl!” Claire said, carrying a bottle of wine.
“Why are you setting up Kenny’s party?” Gabby asked, giving her a hug.
Laura laughed. “Do you really think Kenny Fontenot knows how to set up for anything? For his Super Bowl party last year, he filled the washing machine with ice and put the beers in there.”
“I dunno,” Gabby said, grinning. “That sounds pretty genius to me.”
The girls sat down at the end of the bench as the rest of the partygoers gathered around the keg. “You doing okay?” Claire asked, eyeing her shrewdly.
Laura shrugged. “Just a little stressed with finals and everything, but holding up fine.”
Gabby uncorked the wine and poured it. “Well, tonight we celebrate.” The three girls raised their red Solo cups. “To Brian’s recovery!” she shouted.
Laura flashed a closed-lip smile, clinking her cup with theirs. “Cheers.”
• • •
A FEW HOURS later, the party had consumed a total of thirty hamburgers, twenty-three hot dogs, six bags of chips, four twelve-packs of beer, and six bottles of wine. The party had moved over to Kenny’s fire pit, and Brian was drunkenly holding court, detailing every painstaking moment of his recovery.
Laura, Claire, and Gabby sat on a log away from the crowd. “So, has anyone talked to Madison since she left with Cash?” Laura asked, pouring some more seltzer water into her cup. She had stopped drinking wine an hour ago, since she was Brian’s designated driver.
“We texted a little a couple of days ago,” Claire said. “I think she’s feeling guilty about George, but as much as I hate Cash, I told her she had to do what felt right. Otherwise she’s going to have too many lingering doubts and questions.”
“Is it weird that I actually really liked George?” Gabby confessed, straightening her legs out on the grass.
“No,” Laura agreed. “I thought he was good for her . . . in his own odd way.”
“I actually liked him, too,” Claire said. “But she’s been in love with Cash since they were kids. I can’t blame her for wanting to give that a chance, I guess. I just wish he wasn’t the worst.”
Laura sighed. “Maybe she’s in love with the idea of him, and doesn’t see the bad stuff.” She leaned forward on the log, her elbows propped on her knees. “Maybe she’ll wake up one day and realize he doesn’t make her as happy as she thinks he does.” As she said the words, she couldn’t help but wonder if she was projecting her own insecurities on her friend.
“Well, as much as I don’t like him, I’m all for her doing this.” Gabby cradled the red cup in front of her. “If I learned anything this year, it’s that it’s important to be with the one you love.”
Claire put her hand on Gabby’s arm. “Has Tony reached out any more?”
She shook her head. “Nah. I mean, I wouldn’t have kept texting either if I wasn’t getting a response. It’s for the best, really.”
“I don’t know why you don’t just tell him everything,” Claire said. “Your mom’s out now. Mr. Ford can’t put her back in or anything.”
“We don’t know what he’s capable of,” Gabby said, shaking her head. “And I’m afraid to find out.”
“You could take him,” Claire said, waving her away. “Do I need to remind you about the time you made Collette O’Conner cry in front of everyone at the prom?”
“Well, she shouldn’t have talked about my mom like that.” She shook her head.
The girls laughed, then fell silent. The crowd had gotten progressively drunker as the night wore on. The group was now making s’mores and having a sing-along, like they were at some adult summer camp.
“Should we go over and be social, y’all?” Laura asked. She couldn’t see Brian in the crowd, but knowing him, he was the closest to the fire. Brian loved to roast marshmallows, and they’d always argue over whether they were best browned or blackened.
“Meh,” Gabby said, but nodded.
The girls stood up, and Laura brushed the back of her shorts to get rid of the dirt and leaves that stuck to them. As they walked over to join the rest of the party, she noticed that the bag of marshmallows was empty. “I’ll go grab some more,” she said. “Be right back!”
Inside, she searched the kitchen counter but found only empty beer bottles and plastic food containers scattered across it. She headed over to the walk-in pantry and twisted the doorknob. As the hinges squeaked, a woman’s voice squealed inside. By the time Laura realized someone was in there, it was too late.
Tanya Pothier, one of the seniors on her cheer team last year, peeked out from the doorway. Tanya’s dark eyes were a little unfocused, her brown hair mussed and her lips red.
“Oh my god—I’m so sorry,” Laura said, backing away from the door. “Carry on!”
Tanya covered her mouth and hiccupped, stumbling out of the closet. The door swung wider, and Laura’s mouth dropped when her eyes locked on Brian.
“I’m sorry, babe,” he slurred. “I can explain.”
Laura felt like she was going to vomit. She turned to Tanya, who at least had the decency to look embarrassed. “Out. Now,” she said, pointing to the door to the yard.
After Tanya slunk away, Laura focused her rage back on Brian. She grabbed his arm and dragged him into the den, slamming the door behind them.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” she screamed, not even caring who heard.
“Calm down . . .” he mumbled, sitting on the green-and-red-plaid couch. Brian tapped the cushion next to him, inviting her to join him. Was he out of his freaking mind?
She scowled at him and paced around the room instead. The den’s wood-paneled walls were covered with animal mounts, all of which were staring at them. “How could you do this to me, Brian?” It felt like her heart was beating a thousand times a minute. “And at a party with all of our friends? I just cannot believe you.”
He leaned heavily against the couch. “It was an accident.”
“So, you just accidentally went into the pantry and started making out with another girl?” She paused her pacing, her head pounding like she’d been the one drinking all night.
Brian frowned, clearly trying to think through his excuses. “I’m drunk, babe. I didn’t know what I was doin’.”
How many times in her life was Laura going to hear some lame justification for Brian’s bad behavior? All of a sudden she felt exhausted, like she’d been holding up a wall for months and it finally was collapsing around her. She sat down on a worn armchair across from him and knew what she had to do.
“Brian, I can’t do this anymore,” she said.
“No, don’t say that,” he begged. “You’re overreacting. I just messed up.”
Laura took a deep breath and held her shoulders back, looking directly into his glazed eyes. “Brian, this is so much more than an argument about you kissing some girl. I know you’re drunk right now, and maybe you won’t remember any of this tomorrow, but I need to say this.”
He sat back and stared at her.
“Since we’ve been together, everything I’ve done has been for you. Our whole relationship has revolved around what our lives are gonna be like once you go there and when you do that.” She looked down at her hands, clasped tightly in her lap, and spoke the truth she’d been feeling for months. “I don’t feel like you ever encouraged me or even supported me.” Her mind flashed to Vince, who always pushed her to do better.
“That’s so not true,” Brian interrupted.
“Brian, you told me to quit high school!”
“That’s not fair—you wanted to do that,” he said, his face growing red.
Laura bit her lip and looked away from him. “I thought I did . . . but everyone makes mistakes, right?” She pointed in the direction of the kitchen, reminding him why they were arguing in the first place. “This year, going back to school, I realized that what I really need is to focus on my plans, not yours.”
Brian swallowed and lowered his head.
Laura took a deep breath, her stomach clenching. She couldn’t believe what she was about to say—that it had come to this, after everything they’d been through this year—but she knew it was the right decision. “I don’t think that we should be together anymore.”
Brian’s eyes widened as his face went slack with shock. “Oh baby, you don’t mean that,” he slurred. “You love me.” He held out his hands toward her but didn’t move from the couch. “C’mon. I’m gonna make you so happy. It’s what we both wanted.”
Laura stood from the armchair. “Brian, I’ve always loved you. I will probably always have a place in my heart for you. But this is something that I need to do for myself.” She looked him in the eyes. “There will be other girls who will cheer you on. But it’s not going to be me anymore.”
“Stop it,” Brian hissed, leaning forward so suddenly that he almost toppled off the sofa. “Don’t say that. We can get through this, I promise.”
Laura glanced back at Brian. He was now sprawled across the couch, his beer-stained T-shirt straining over his belly. His drunkenness only reminded Laura of all the promises he’d made her over the past year and how few of them he’d actually kept.
“I just don’t think you’re ever gonna change. But the thing is . . . I have.”
As she walked out of the room, Laura fought back tears. Leaving Brian was the scariest thing she’d ever done, and the hardest. But she couldn’t deny that it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She’d spent so long carrying his dreams for him. And now, finally, she had the freedom to find her own.