46

Roddie Drummond

Fifteen years earlier

Mhairi was screaming at me. Every word seemed to be stoking the fury in her eyes. I tried to calm her down, aware of another presence in the room, listening to every word, watching every move. Waiting. Mhairi’s eyes frequently darted towards him, standing in the doorframe, as she raged.

I’d seen her face set tightly when she’d arrived home to find us waiting for her, but she’d said nothing until she’d put Sonya to bed. Then she came into the living room and her fury uncorked. She didn’t care who could hear her. Her words were for him, too.

‘How could you be involved in such a thing?’ Mhairi’s voice had changed. The anger still snarled, but something else had joined it. Disappointment. And that was harder to bear.

‘You don’t understand,’ I told her, one hand reaching out to her, but she stepped out of reach.

‘You’re bloody right I don’t. I don’t understand any of this. Drugs and crooks and people-smuggling. Ray dying. Donnie as good as. You and Henry involved in this . . . business. No, I don’t understand,’ she ranted.

‘It’s just this once,’ I assured her, glancing at the figure in the doorway. ‘Henry agreed to help his friend, that’s all. And he asked me to give him a hand. The money’s good, Mhairi, and we can use it, you know that . . .’

Her eyes flashed again. ‘The money? The money’s good? What about those women? What’s good for them?’

I couldn’t answer that. I’d ignored the truth of what Henry and his friends were doing—only concentrated on the benefits for him. And Mhairi, of course.

‘You can’t tell anyone, Mhairi,’ I had to say. It was important she knew.

‘You expect me to keep quiet? You expect me to be part of it all?’

I saw our guest’s head raise slightly at this. Could tell the atmosphere was changing.

I didn’t know how much English Tamaz knew, but I suspected enough to understand what was being said. I had to make Mhairi understand.

‘You’re not part of this, I am,’ I said. ‘You just need to keep it to yourself. You can’t tell anyone.’

Her laugh was brittle. ‘Secrets. More secrets.’

‘Mhairi, listen to me. You don’t understand how important it is that you say nothing about this.’

She followed my glance to Tamaz, studying him as if he had just arrived, even though we had been waiting for her to return with the child. ‘And what happens if I don’t?’

Tamaz stared back at her, his expression inscrutable.

I dropped another log into the grate; it had been well-seasoned and the fire was hot, but I felt the need to do something. The bark began to smoulder immediately. I had set it earlier that evening and Tamaz had ordered me to put a match to it while we were waiting for Mhairi. The big man felt the cold. That surprised me.

I turned and looked at Tamaz again, the reflection of the flames dancing in his pupils the only sign of life I could see. The big Russian could have been a statue, he was so still.

‘Mhairi, please,’ I begged. I was starting to feel a little frightened by now. She didn’t reply. The look she was giving Tamaz was one I had seen many times. It was a challenge, a dare.

Tamaz still bore his blank expression but I knew he was the last person in the world she should be goading. Sonya made a noise in the bedroom. A little moan as she slept. Tamaz heard it.

‘Go see baby,’ he said, but when Mhairi moved to pass him he stepped in her way and pointed at me. ‘No. You go see baby.’

I didn’t move. Sonya moaned again. It’s just a little moan, I wanted to say. She does it all the time. But I didn’t speak. Tamaz stared at Mhairi. He looked calm.

‘Roddie?’ I could sense confusion in Mhairi’s eyes.

‘She won’t say anything,’ I told Tamaz. I moved to stand between the big man and Mhairi.

‘Go see baby,’ Tamaz repeated in his monotone, as if he was bored.

Sonya had fallen silent again. ‘She’s fine,’ I said, the words trembling. ‘Let’s just relax here, okay? All of us relax.’ I held my hands out, one in Mhairi’s direction, the other towards Tamaz. ‘Mhairi, tell him you won’t say anything about what you saw.’

For a moment I thought she was going to continue to defy him, but then I saw fear overcome her outrage. She looked to the floor.

‘Everything’s fine.’ I smiled at Tamaz with a confidence he most certainly did not feel. ‘We’ll go back, tell them everything’s fine. No worries, okay?’

Tamaz didn’t move. He looked at me, blinked, then switched to Mhairi. She raised her eyes again and I saw quiet defiance.

Tamaz gave her a curt nod. ‘Go see baby.’

‘Tamaz, mate, the baby’s fine, she just . . .’

Those flat, emotionless eyes slid back towards me. ‘Go see baby. Or I go see baby. You choose.’

‘Don’t you go anywhere near her,’ Mhairi screamed, launching herself at the big man, but he merely folded his huge arms around her and pinned her against him. She struggled but wasn’t strong enough to break free.

Tamaz looked at me again. ‘Go see baby.’ His voice was even.

My heart thudded in my chest. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t say anything.

‘Do it now,’ Tamaz shouted.

I caught Mhairi’s eye. I wanted to tell her it would be all right. I wanted to tell Tamaz that I was staying right where I was. I wanted to be man enough to protect the woman I loved. I wanted to be the hero of my own story . . .

I slid past the Russian and moved into the bedroom. It was dark and it was cool and Sonya was sleeping soundly.

I should have gone back into the living room. I should have done the right thing. I should have been there.

I closed the bedroom door, sat on a small stool beside Sonya’s cot, stroked her head and spoke softly, soothingly, fearful I would wake her up, but needing to make some kind of noise to block out the sounds from beyond that closed door . . .