Adele was a woman with an inner strength her brother had often envied. It wasn’t enough. Gavin had watched her go down for weeks. She looked exhausted, defeated even, and seemed to have aged. Not bothering with makeup didn’t help. Neither did the navy-blue cardigan she was wearing, fit only for the bin. Two months since the abduction and still she hadn’t come to terms with her guilt over Mackenzie.
Adele and Blair had tried to work it out. It only lasted weeks before he left for good. The split couldn’t have come at a worse time. He’d always been more than her husband; he’d been her best friend. Adele hadn’t appreciated how much she relied on him until he wasn’t there. Without him the world didn’t make sense.
Gavin kissed her forehead and guided Monica and Alice inside. On the night of the birthday party, when his sister had proudly given them a tour, it had been a show house. Not anymore. Clothes were scattered on every chair. Adele saw the surprise on their faces and made a half-hearted apology. ‘Sorry about the state of the place. Keep meaning to get round to tidying up. Can’t find the energy.’
This was so unlike his sister. Gavin drew her aside. ‘You okay?’
Her answer was candid. ‘As a matter of fact, no, I’m not.’
‘What’s wrong?’
‘What isn’t wrong? Since Blair left the boys are a nightmare. Adam more than Richard. He was the quiet one. Now he’s surly and aggressive. I hardly recognise him.’
‘They need time to adjust. Besides, he’s a teenager.’
‘It’s worse than that. The school’s given him a final warning.’
‘Why? What’s he done?’
‘Got caught cheating in an exam. Before that he beat a pupil up.’
‘Doesn’t sound like Adam.’
‘One more “incident” and he’ll be expelled. And he hates Blair. Hates him. If I even say his name he goes out of the room. I’ve explained things sometimes don’t work out with adults. Talking to myself. He won’t forgive him for what he’s done to us.’
‘Kids are tougher than we think, he’ll get over it.’
‘That’s just it. I don’t know that he will. At least not before he’s screwed up his future.’
‘Is Richard the same?’
‘Coping better than his brother which isn’t saying much. Stays in his room most of the time. Won’t discuss it. You can see he just misses his dad.’
‘Want me to speak to them?’
Adele shrugged. ‘Would you?’
‘Where are they?’
She pointed at the ceiling. ‘Where they always are.’
Gavin climbed the stairs, knocked on the door and went in. Adam was on the carpet, his back against the bed, playing with his X-Box. He didn’t notice his uncle until he was in front of him. ‘Am I interrupting?’
The boy looked at him blankly.
‘Where’s Richard?’
‘In his room, I suppose.’
‘Get him, will you? It’s important.’
Talking to teenagers was a waste of time, but for Adele’s sake he had to give it a shot. When he had them together he closed the door.
‘Cards on the table. Tell me how you’re doing.’
He’d known the boys all their lives. Suddenly the years watching them growing up meant nothing, he’d become the enemy. Adam answered. ‘We’re all right.’
‘Pleased to hear it. Really pleased. Because your mum. In fact, I’m worried about whether she’ll ever be all right again.’
The boys didn’t react.
‘Look, when I was your age I didn’t realise adults were just people. And people make mistakes. Sometimes they do it wrong.’
Adam said, ‘If you’re talking about him, he’s a waster, and she’s an idiot for putting up with it.’
‘Him is your father. And sure he’s wrong. Made a complete mess of it. Nobody knows that better than he does. But give him a chance to make it right. And she – your mum – an idiot? No, just a woman, a wife and mother, desperately trying to hold her family together. On top of that she’s got your Aunt Mackenzie to worry about. So, believe me, your mum’s a lot more hurt than you are. She’s sad and she’s scared and she’s angry. And she needs her boys to help her get through it.’
Gavin walked to the bedroom door. ‘Her heart’s been broken once. She doesn’t deserve to have it broken again. Time to man-up, guys.’
Downstairs Derek still hadn’t arrived. Adele was in the kitchen. Monica said, ‘How did it go?’
He made a face. ‘Who knows? All you can do is try.’
‘They could come to us once a week. Give Adele a break.’
‘They’ll see that as a prison sentence.’
‘Okay. Once or twice a month, then. Get to know Alice. Be good for everybody.’
Gavin put his arms round her waist. ‘I’m lucky to have you.’
‘At last, you’re starting to notice.’
He kissed her cheek. ‘I never stopped noticing.’
‘What does Derek want to talk about?’
The doorbell rang and Gavin said, ‘We’ll soon find out, he’s here.’
At the last family gathering Derek Crawford had accused Blair Gardiner and they’d ended up fighting. There would be no repeat. Blair wasn’t part of the family anymore.
It was rare to see him casually dressed, usually he wore a suit. Tonight he hadn’t bothered with a jacket and his white shirt was open at the neck. The casualness didn’t extend to his expression. He said, ‘Sorry I’m late,’ and came into the lounge. Adele had made an effort and put on makeup. She forced a smile and passed a cup of coffee to her brother-in-law, wondering like the others what this was about.
On the couch, Monica squeezed Gavin’s hand, her question about to be answered. Derek cleared his throat. ‘I asked to meet this evening to bring you up-to-date on Mackenzie so we’re all on the same page.’
To Gavin it sounded as if he was running a team meeting.
‘Dr Chilolo was sure that physically there’s little standing in the way of her making a complete recovery. He was right. Every day, Mackenzie is getting stronger. Mentally, if anything, she’s worse.’
He took a sip from his cup. ‘You love her as much as I do, which makes what I have to say harder. But I don’t have a choice.’
Gavin guessed what was coming and he was right. Derek looked straight at him and said, ‘What you did – however well-intentioned – was a bad idea.’
‘She asked me to take her.’
Derek nodded. ‘You don’t have to convince me, I’m sure she did. But you have to appreciate – we all have to appreciate – there’s a big difference between what Mackenzie wants and what Mackenzie needs.’
Adele was next on his list. ‘Asking how she’s doing, talking to her about therapy, upsets her.’ He held up his hand. ‘I know. She appears to be okay. Enthusiastic even. If only you could hear what she tells me. It gets so bad she’s afraid to go to sleep. When she eventually does it’s never for more than an hour or two. Then she wakes up screaming, convinced she can hear rats behind the walls. It’s heartbreaking.’
He looked at each of them in turn. ‘We all have our own thoughts about what happened two months ago. I certainly do. I’ve done my best but she isn’t getting better.’
‘I don’t understand. I saw her on Friday. She told me she was feeling fine.’
Derek shook his head. ‘That’s the thing. The Mackenzie you see is different from the one I live with. Very different.’
Adele tried to be positive. ‘I’m sorry, Derek, I still don’t understand. She even talked about her plans to open a shelter for women who’ve been abused.’
He raised an eyebrow. This was the first he’d heard of it.
‘She feels strongly about getting them out of harm’s way. I think it’s a wonderful idea. I told her I’d help.’
Derek lost his temper. ‘You don’t get it. She’s worse. A lot worse. What that bastard did to her… do you really believe reliving the nightmare every day for the rest of her life is going to help? Mackenzie needs to forget it. Move on.’
Monica spoke calmly. ‘I hear what you’re saying Derek but I agree with Adele. It’s a great idea. Working with other people, helping them, would be the best therapy she could get. Maybe you’re being over-protective.’
He let out an exasperated sigh. ‘She won’t consider proper therapy. Flatly refuses. And without a professional in charge the kind of things you’re doing and saying could even be dangerous. As for being over-protective, maybe I am. But remember, I nearly lost her.’
Gavin voiced what the three of them were thinking. ‘Are you asking us to stay away from Mackenzie?’
The two men stared at each other. ‘No, I haven’t said that. In fact, quite the opposite. The thing is: I need to get back to work. I can’t stay away indefinitely. Mrs Hawthorne, our cleaner, has been sitting with Mackenzie a couple of days a week so I can go in. But she has other commitments. If necessary, I’ll hire a private nurse. But I was hoping Adele and Monica might step up. It’s just really important that nothing and no one stands in the way of her recovery. We all have to realise what is and isn’t good for her. As I said, that we’re on the same page here.’
He sat back apparently unaware of the effect he’d had on them. ‘We all have Mackenzie’s best interests at heart. If she’s going to recover we have to work together on this. Do you agree?’
Monica moved in to smooth the ruffled feathers. ‘Absolutely Derek. We’ll be there for her. I was thinking the three of us could treat ourselves to afternoon tea at Crossbasket Castle in Blantyre. What do you think, Adele? Then we could work out a rota – you know, going to the gym and stuff.’
Derek’s bullish approach was ill-judged and Gavin didn’t know whether to be proud of Monica or angry at him.
Derek tried to soften what he’d been saying. ‘It’s not all bad news. She’s given up smoking and it looks as if alcohol is out of the picture. Hasn’t once taken a drink. She’s even talked about going back to the garden centre. I don’t discourage it, though of course it won’t be happening. And, as you’ve probably guessed, we won’t be splitting up. Mackenzie needs me more than ever.’
Adele was still smarting from their difference of opinions but did her best to hide it. ‘Oh, that’s marvellous news. I was afraid to ask.’
Monica was more clear-sighted. ‘What about the man in the car?’
Derek Crawford didn’t hide his displeasure with her. ‘Turns out it was my mistake, he was a friend from Alcoholics Anonymous.’
The news, delivered casually, was a stark reminder they’d chosen to think the worst. That when Mackenzie needed them to believe her none of them had. For seconds they avoided each others’ eyes, not comfortable enough to speak, until Monica said, ‘AA? She was going to AA? Why didn’t she tell us?’
Gavin answered. ‘Maybe she didn’t trust us.’
Derek didn’t comment. He got up and walked to the door. ‘I’d better be getting back. There is one more thing. And Mackenzie mustn’t hear about it.’ He spoke as if it had almost slipped his mind. ‘The lawyer got it wrong. Because they can’t be sure who the knife belonged to the procurator fiscal didn’t dismiss the charge. I’m going to be tried for the culpable homicide of Joe Melia.’