We’d almost made it to the tree line when a man in a khaki-colored uniform appeared before us, brandishing a big net.
“Why, hello there, little one,” he said, moving close. “If you’ll just come with me, nobody has to get hurt.”
“Is he talking to me?” I whispered to Amy.
Of course, she couldn’t really reply without the man hearing a tiny little bird speaking in a strange Southern accent.
“What do you want to bet that jerk called Barney Fife here as he made his way out of the park?” I growled.
“Tweet, tweet,” Amy said brightly.
The guy lunged, swinging his net toward me. But either he wasn’t fast enough, or I was a good deal quicker than I realized. With a move befitting a pro athlete, I lunged out of the madman’s path, accidentally shaking Amy loose in the process.
“What now?” I yelled.
“Chirp!” Amy flew forward, like a little, yellow navigation beacon.
And I readily followed.
We charged forward, quickly putting distance between us and the net, but now we had a different problem.
And it was spelled D-O-G.
Big dogs, little dogs, leashed dogs, free dogs.
They all evaded their owners to give chase to the furry missile flying across the park.
So now, I had a small army of dogs of all sizes, colors, and stripes, plus an animal control officer, after me. Somehow my life had devolved into a Benny Hill chase scene.
And despite that one pro-athlete move, I was not in the best shape of my life, either. Still, I lumbered as fast as I could down the path that led to the parking lot. My muscles burned and my breath escaped in ragged gasps, fervently praying Kaye would be there to back me up when I arrived. I darted around a bend and nearly ran head-first into a second animal control officer.
“You have got to be kidding me,” I yelled as I changed course and skidded into the big grassy area nearby AKA slobber-monster central.
A third officer crouched nearby with his net at the ready. Had I done something truly awful in a past life? Because not even a con deserved this kind of poor fortune.
“Tweet!” Amy shouted urgently. “Tweet, tweet!”
I jumped, just in time to dodge a terrier with wildly gnashing teeth. As I sailed through the air, the third officer swung his net. With the last little bit of feline grace I had left in my system, I managed to get my paws on the outer rim of the net and push off from it.
“You don’t sound like a bird!” I yelled to my partner in crime as I hit the ground and took off running again, making a beeline for the wooded safe haven. I mean, surely as a cat I could maneuver the trees and underbrush better than gangly humans and a bunch of crazed dogs.
Well, unfortunately, the dogs moved through the bushes a lot faster than I’d originally given them credit for. And I was nearly deafened by their howls and barking as they crashed through the woods like a herd of drunken elephants.
I kept pushing forward, desperate to get away. Cat or not, I wanted to live!
The last thing I needed was to end up a chew toy for a bunch of over-privileged mongrels. Or worse, to be scooped up by human dog catchers and locked up in a prison even worse than the one I’d only escaped weeks before. As a shifter, I’d heard story after story of friends that had gotten sloppy and got caught.
They tended to end up microchipped and ‘fixed.’
Well, that wouldn’t be my fate. Not today. Not ever.
I crested a small hill and found a small dip in the ground. At the bottom, a bustling creek snaked through the landscape.
“Oh, c’mon,” I moaned. Cats and water did not mix. Seriously, whose idea of a cruel joke was this?
The dogs were still crashing along behind me. Distant shouts of humans followed in kind—both dog catchers and dog owners alike, if I had to guess.
I had two evils behind me, but only one evil out front.
It was time to get wet.
“Go, Moss, go,” Amy shouted. I was shocked she’d managed to keep pace, but there she was. With me until the bitter end. Oh, please, please don’t let this be the end.
“Okay, I’m going in,” I panted. Soon I’d have no energy left. My only hope was that some outside party intervened before that happened. Pushing forward, I jumped with all my might and landed mid-stream with a massive splash.
“Gross,” I moaned as I pushed off the slimy rocks and tried to paddle for the other side.
I splashed and crashed my way across, getting more and more soaked and more and more desperate with each stroke. Water, muck, and other yucky stuff clung to my fur, threatening to pull me under.
After everything I’ve been through in life, was this really how I died?
Sobbing like a kitten, I staggered out of the creek and up the muddy bank.
“I hate the Magical Corrections System,” I said, each word punctuated by a desperate gasp for air. “I hate that I was a thief. I’ve said this several times today, but I swear it on my life, I’m never doing anything that could get me in trouble ever again. No way, no how.”
“I think the dogs have lost your scent,” Amy said a few moments later. “They don’t seem to be following.”
I nodded, keeping my focus on moving forward. I was so tired, achy, dirty, and so full of remorse I was ready to burst. It was all I could do to keep trudging along.
With a shudder that almost became a literal cry of relief, we broke through the trees on the other side of the creek, very close to the parking lot.
“Surely she’s here by now,” I said with a whimper. Everything hurt. I needed to be done. To be safe. To be out of this mess.
But Kaye was nowhere to be seen.
“Ah, gotcha!”
I couldn’t even react before the net landed over top of me. With a twist and a scoop, I was suddenly airborne, tangled in the mass of nylon and wire.
As hard as I tried to break free, I couldn’t escape my bonds. Not until the human chose to shake me out of the net and into a dank metal cage.
A door slammed, thrusting me into darkness. I was trapped, dirty, aching, tired, and so, so sorry for everything I’d ever done wrong in my miserable life. “H-how did this happen?” I mewled weakly.
“This is horrible,” Amy squeaked as she landed on top of my cage. “But we’re in this together. I won’t leave you, Moss.”
“No, you have to stay here and wait for Kaye. Tell her what happened and tell her to hightail it to the animal control office before they snip me!”
Amy gasped. “Oh, I hadn’t even thought of that. Okay, I’ll find Kaye and then we’ll both bust you out.”
She flew off, leaving me utterly alone as the truck rumbled out of the parking lot.