Derek’s eyes hurt and his back ached. The sun was setting all around him, staining the sky like blood. He had an hour left until Albury, and he wasn’t stopping. Mara’s voice message had come three hours ago, while he was sitting in a bar with Chase and a few of the HFA kids, having a victory beer. He’d almost spilt his drink on himself jamming his phone to his ear.
“Hi, Derek, I’m in Albury, at my grandma’s old place. I saw what you did with Chase, and I finally read your story.”
She gave a small sob.
“Can you come and get me? Please? I really want to see you.”
Derek had shoved his phone in his pocket, already fumbling for his keys.
“Mara?” Chase had asked, and a few staff members looked around eagerly.
“Yeah, she’s at her grandma’s place in Albury.”
He smirked. “I thought she might be. Get going, then.”
But Derek had frozen in place. “You thought she might…?”
“Be at her grandma’s? Yeah, I handle her finances. I know she owns that old house.”
Derek gaped at him. “Then, why…?”
“I figured Mara was owed a little actual privacy.” Chase took the pint-glass out of his hand. “I’ll take care of this. You go get our girl.”
“Wait,” a punky-looking chick said. “You found Mara? Mara’s coming back?!”
“That’s none of your business,” Chase snapped. “Run, Mr Football. Run before the vermin demand to come with you.”
Derek had made a quick stop at home to change clothes, then hit the road, sitting on the speed limit at every turn. That had been two and a half hours ago. His heart was hammering so hard he was worried about the long-term health risks, and only pride kept him from peeing in bottles. He couldn’t shake the feeling that Mara might be gone by the time he got there—like a secret society that vacated the building as soon as a stranger approached.
He pulled over at the highway McDonald’s to use the bathroom and grab a bottled water. When he returned to his G-wagon, he saw Howard was calling. He hesitated, then answered through Bluetooth.
“Where are you?” Howard demanded. “What the fuck’s going on?”
“Nothing.” He pulled out of the car park. “I can’t talk for long.”
“Have you lost your fucking mind? Has this female you’re seeing turned your head all the way around? You canceled your next meeting with The Rattlers. You’re doing this ambassador bullshit. What the fuck are you thinking?”
“Don’t worry about me, mate. And don’t worry about The Rattlers. I already told them I’m staying with The Sharks.”
Howard sucked in a breath. “You little… When? How?”
“It’s a long story.” Derek cracked open the bottle of water. “I didn’t want to do this over the phone, but I don’t need your help anymore, mate.”
“Wait, what? You’re cutting me out? After all I’ve done for you?”
“If you want to see it that way.”
Howard drew in a breath. “You’ll be broke by the end of the year.”
“I don’t think so, mate. I showed a finance guy how much you charge, and he shit bricks. Says you’re robbing me blind.”
Chase had also offered to find him two people to do the same work for half the pay, but Derek wasn’t petty enough to mention that. There was a long silence. Derek guessed his ex-manager was doing some quick thinking.
“Look, mate, I’m sorry, but you can’t do this,” Howard said in what he clearly thought was a ‘tough-but-fair’ voice. “Think of your sisters. Think of your family. They’re gonna need your help and you’re gonna need my help.”
So, he’d landed on the family thing, had he? That made sense. Howard had always acted like a surrogate dad. But he already had a dad, a dad doing hard time for murder. And if that wasn’t an advert for the limitations of fatherhood, Derek didn’t know what was.
“Derek?” Howard said in his low, listen-to-father voice. “You there?”
“I’m here. And I appreciate the concern, but money’s not gonna be a problem.”
“Why not?”
He grinned. “Because my missus is crazy rich. I’ll drop off the severance papers Monday, Howard. See you.”
He hung up, laughing to himself.
Albury had exploded in size since he and Mara were kids, the suburbs sprawling where there’d once been canola fields and bushland. Derek rolled through the wide streets, past sun-bleached storefronts and blondes pushing strollers. He wasn’t in his decoy car, but no one seemed to recognise him, which was a relief. The last time he was in Albury, there’d been a mini-parade as people in shops and parks rushed out to see him. Then again, he’d been in Willow’s Lamborghini, with Willow throwing chocolate Fantails out of the window like a demented ginger Santa Claus.
This time, if he was lucky—and managed to control his appetite—he might be able to swing this without anyone knowing he was here.
He drove past his old high school, raising his middle finger out of habit. A gang of older boys stood by the fence, kicking the dirt, and looking so fake tough Derek laughed. It was crazy to think he’d met the girl of his dreams at their age.
He stared at the teenagers and something shifted inside him. He was a moron to have done what he did to Mara—but Beth was right. He’d also been a kid with two crazy parents and no idea what he was doing. And if Mara could forgive him—and he hoped like fuck she could—he could probably look into forgiving himself.
Derek followed the main road to the bad side of town. The houses got smaller and the gardens, uglier. This was where he’d ridden his bike with his mates, done stupid dares, and drunk stolen booze, or Red Bull when they couldn’t get alcohol. He turned into Mara’s old street, Bailey Avenue, and his head swam. The dilapidated houses and overgrown hedges were exactly the same. They made him think of witches living on the edge of civilisation. Of his wolf girl, mixing her potions. But when he pulled up to Winnie Temple’s place, he found it had changed. Her perfectly manicured garden beds were bursting with weeds and blackberry brambles, and the house was pink. Not a professional pink. Pink like a big salmon had chucked up all over it.
Mara? Or vandals? He hoped vandals.
He pulled up under the huge gum tree where he used to park, and despite the pink house, he was sure—physically sure—Mrs Temple was going to come outside and tell him he’d better have car insurance because branches fell all the time.
He looked down at his hands, drawing comfort from the tattoos. He hadn’t had them when he was eighteen. This wasn’t the past.
Then, just like it used to, the screen door swung open, and Mara stepped out to defend him against her grandmother’s grumpiness. Only she wasn’t from the past, either. She had long hair and smooth skin and she stood, waving at him in a tiny blue sundress, looking absolutely gorgeous.
When he got out of the car, he found his legs were heavy. In no way had he planned to be nervous to see her. In no way was he ready to get hurt—yet here he was, hesitating. After all they’d gone through and everything they’d missed over the past ten years, who could promise it would all be okay?
The screen door banged open again, and Pan sprinted across the lawn, a scrap of yellow sunshine. Derek dropped to one knee and picked her up. She licked his face and he could have fucking cried. He carried her over to Mara. “Hi, Little Miss. Does this belong to you?”
Mara’s eyes were shining with tears. “You came.”
“Yeah, sorry I’m a bit late.”
“You must have left as soon as you got my message.”
“Nah, or I’d have gotten here a decade ago.”
They smiled at each other, and Derek knew it was now or never. He lowered Pan to the ground, glad to have an excuse to kneel. The words he’d rehearsed the whole way to Albury sat on the tip of his tongue. “Mara?”
She pressed a hand to her mouth. “What are you doing?”
“What I should have done ten years ago.” He took her hand. “Mara, I’m so sorry for the Troy thing. There’s nothing for me to forgive. It just doesn’t fucking matter.”
She smiled, tears welling in her eyes. “I’m glad to hear you say that.”
“I’m sorry I made you wait. It wasn’t fair.”
The tears spilled out like clear pearls and Mara shook her head. “The crazy thing is, I did wait. I haven’t loved anyone since you.”
A lump rose in his throat. He swallowed hard. “Me either, which is why I’d like to ask you to marry me.”
She smiled down at him, her whole face shining.
“You don’t have to say yes—”
“Yes!”
He blinked. “Yes?”
“Yes!” She put her hand on his shoulders. “Yes, I’ll marry you. Daddy, I need…”
And he understood. He got to his feet and pulled her into his arms, kissing her deeply. She was warm and fresh and tasted like home. They kissed until Pan’s barking tore them apart.
“Oh my god,” Mara said, wiping away tears. “We’re engaged.”
“Yeah,” Derek rubbed his own stupidly wet eyes. “Fuck, I forgot.”
He got back on his left knee and dug around in his jeans until he found the small sapphire ring. He held it up. “This is for you, if you’d like it?”
Mara stared at the ring in wonder. “Is that…?”
“Yeah, your grandma gave it to me before I left town. Told me to hold onto it.”
Mara stared at him. “Grandma did that? She gave you her engagement ring?”
“Yeah. I thought she was telling me to do the right thing, but now I think maybe she knew what was going to happen and she was trying to give me a way back.”
Pan yipped, and Derek pulled her under his arm, holding her up along with the ring. “Mara Kennedy, will you do me the honour of marrying me? Can I be your Daddy forever?”
“Derek…” Mara’s voice was little more than a whisper. “You have no idea how precious this is.”
“I do. Because I know you.”
Mara held out her hand and he slid the sapphire onto her ring finger. The blue stone sparkled in the sunlight, and he bowed his head, letting the hot tears run down his face. He felt like she held all of him in the palm of her hand.
“Daddy?” A cool finger slid under his chin, urging him to his feet. He stood, towering over the woman he loved.
“Yes, Little Miss?”
“I love you.”
And Derek felt the terror he’d first felt at eighteen in English class. The knowledge that he truly loved something that existed outside his own body. Something that was always at risk. But then she took his hand, and he knew the price was more than fair. A little fear, for all of her love.
He looked up at the cathedral of white gum trees above them and wished they were getting married now, but there was plenty of time for that. Mara held her grandma’s ring to the sun, studying it from all sides.
“I wanted to propose when we were kids,” he told her.
“You did not!”
“I did. When I came back up here to look for you, I had that ring in my pocket.”
Her face fell. “Oh, Derek, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be.” He slung an arm around her shoulders. “It all worked out okay in the end.”
She smiled. “You know, I thought about running away to Melbourne and becoming a stripper so I could live near you.”
Derek laughed. “I would have bought all your time every night. You would have ended my career.”
“Nothing could have done that.” She snuggled into his side. “I missed you.”
The hot glow in Derek’s chest spread; it felt like it was taking over his body. They kissed, and it was like falling into the warm centre of a star. Him and Mara, together at last.