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“NOW THAT YOUR BROTHER's made a mess of our family's relationship with Wilhelmina Collins, we can say farewell to Longbourn!” Mr. Bennet's exclamation was followed by an overdramatic sniffle. “Your mother is feeling under the weather, you know. If she died, what is to stop Miss Collins from tossing our entire family on the street, Elisander? Hmm?”
Elisander's peace was destroyed by his father's wild claims. Duchess, the Bennets' fox terrier, was lounging on the floor near his feet. As he reached down to scratch the dog's head, he said, “Father, nothing you say makes a bit of sense! To begin with, I thought you would be happy about Joseph's engagement! He's going to marry the lady of Netherfield! He's aligned himself with a very wealthy woman.”
“Yes. I know. And his engagement thrills me. Truly,” Mr. Bennet assured his second son. “However, it does not erase the fact that Wilhelmina Collins has suffered quite a grievous slight! Joseph declined her proposal, changed his mind... and abandoned her on the way to Gretna Green?” Elisander's father groaned into his perspiring palm. “It is too awful to think about!”
When Duchess licked his toes, Elisander retracted his feet and sat cross-legged on the sofa. It was not a gentlemanly way to sit, and he half-expected a lecture from his father, but Mr. Bennet was too addicted to his own grief to spare a thought for his son's poor posture.
“Father...” Elisander started his sentence with a heavy sigh, “Mother is feeling under the weather, but she is hardly close to death. Her illness is a cold. Nothing more. In a few days, her sniffling will cease, and you will feel sheepish about this entire conversation!”
“Will I?” Mr. Bennet raised a doubtful eyebrow. “This morning, she had a suspicious rattle in her lungs! My own mother—your grandmother—died of such an illness. When a disease settles in one's lungs, it is nothing to take lightly.”
Elisander glanced at Kier, who shared the drawing room with Elisander and their father. Elisander envied his younger brother's ability to concentrate on his novel. As their father squawked and warbled, Kier's eyes never wandered from the pages of his book.
“Very well. Let's say Mother is dying...” Elisander began.
Elisander's tongue was halted by a sharp gasp from Mr. Bennet. “Do you think she is?”
“No, Father! Of course not!” exclaimed an aggrieved Elisander. Across the room, Kier was stifling a snicker. His brother must have been listening to their conversation more than Elisander realized. “For the sake of argument, let us assume Mother is on death's door. Do you really think Miss Collins would be cruel enough to toss us from our home?”
“Yes, I do! I absolutely do!” Mr. Bennet argued. “There is nothing more frightening than a woman who's suffered an insult, Elisander! She will remember Joseph's unchivalrous behavior for the rest of her life! Mark my words!”
“So... what do we do?” Though he invited his father to share a solution, Elisander was hardly eager to hear it.
“You must fix this mistake!” Mr. Bennet declared. “You, and only you, have the power unravel your brother's mess. I believe Miss Collins has an affinity for you. I beg you to use that affinity to your advantage.”
“Does that mean you expect me to marry her?” Elisander moaned.
“No. Unless you want to marry her?” For a few seconds, Mr. Bennet's eyes were hopeful, but his son's shaking head made him surrender the notion. “I'm only asking you to pay her a visit, Elisander. Ingratiate yourself to her. Be her friend. Remind her of our family's positive traits.”
“Must I?” Elisander already knew the answer. Asking was a waste of time.
“Of course you must! And I will accompany you, of course.”
Duchess' collar jingled as she leapt into Elisander's lap. She could not bear to be separated from her favorite Bennet brother.
“And we'll take Kier with us,” Mr. Bennet added. “I'm sure he has nothing better to do, and he's harmless enough. I doubt Miss Collins will object to his presence.”
Kier finally glanced up from his book. “Can I object?” he asked.
“No. You're going. Elisander is going. The three of us are all making the trip to Wilhelmina's cottage!” Mr. Bennet decided. “And if I hear any more objections, do not be surprised if I disown the lot of you!”