Create Your Own Reality
When is it appropriate to tell one’s children that they create their own reality?
When would you have liked to have been told? So, you learned when you were 35 and already a mother? Did you ever wish that you had known earlier? Yes, of course, you say, of course, for it would have helped you understand your life circumstances better. Our admonition is to tell your little ones as soon as they can talk. As you walk your talk, so will they. Speak to them of your own dreams and aspirations. As children grow up, most parenting is based on the idea of protecting them from dangers. You tell them not to speak to strangers, you tell them not to cross the road, you tell them not to touch what is dirty and to keep away from an open flame. Your way of educating them largely puts them in a defensive mode where they learn, as you have learned, how to resist the world and push against the things they don’t want, just as you have been doing.
Would you deny anyone the valuable knowledge that they create their own reality? Then don’t deny it to your children. When you inform your children about who they are, they will become your teachers and you will marvel at them. How much more appropriate it is to tell your child, “You are a child of the Universe and the power that creates worlds is within you. As you think of something you want, and focus for a little while on the nice feeling of possessing it, it will be yours,” instead of, “Save for a rainy day, you never know when things may run out!”
You can become whatever you want to be, and most of you struggle with that concept. You believe it, or at least want to believe it; it sounds logical, but your inner feelings tell you otherwise for you have been programmed and taught to accept less. How grand it would be if you could give your children the gift of knowing, as they emerge into this world, that they can become whatever they want.
How can I balance what is practical with what I know to be true? For example, if I tell my children they can have, and do, and become whatever they want, how do I tell them that I can’t afford to buy them the thing they are asking me for? I don’t want to send them contradictory messages.
Remember, children are fickle beings, even more so than their parents! Just as we have taught you to feel what it is that you want, teach your own children the same thing. You are not teaching your child that the Universe will provide an ice-cream each time he or she asks for one, for you know that too much of that is inappropriate. First, teach your children how to feel, and if they want something big thing, tell them to keep it a secret and to play with their wishes for a while. You see, for the most part, a child’s wishes are short lived. Little Tommy wants a new red bicycle, and he really believes that he wants it. Then just one day after deciding that he really, really wants it, he sees the other boys in the neighbourhood all have blue bicycles, so guess what? Tommy now wants a blue one, and no longer a red one. That is the nature of children. What we are teaching you is what we advise you to teach your children. You do not sit about and visualise buying a bunch of grapes, do you? No, for the means to do so is already within your realm of expectation. Your belief system has already delivered you to the point where no hurdles need to be overcome in order to acquire a bunch of grapes.
Teach your children, as we teach you, that they are the source of all that they want. Tell them that, if they change their mind each day, the Universe won’t know what to send them. Let us say this to you. If a child really and truly wants a new red bicycle, and allows it into his or her life and gets to a point of expectation, it will come. Either you, or an uncle, aunt, grandparent, or a prize will deliver it to that child.
The disappointments that occur in a child’s life are caused by the unspoken communication between parents and child. Every thought that you have as a parent is communicated directly to your child, whether or not that child is physically present. If you as the parent are struggling with self-worth, or finances, or a lack of self-confidence or respect, then those feelings are passed on to the child.
Every unresolved emotion gets passed on to the child. Every belief gets passed on to the child. Children are like sponges. The greatest service you can offer them is to change your beliefs concerning abundance. If you are afraid that your children’s belief in abundance is going to be a drain on your resources, then this is a sign for you to change your own beliefs regarding your resources.
I have two children. One child I feel very close to. I recognised him the minute he was born; it was a close soul connection. I love my other child, too, but she has recognised this special connection and I sense that she feels left out or hurt.
You have a soul connection to both children, not just to the one child. No child is born to parents without there being an agreement and dialogue between the parents and the incoming soul. You may not be aware of this dialogue, but we assure you it was there.
Remember that each child came to you voluntarily and that you voluntarily agreed to be the host parent. You may or may not have had more lifetime connections with the one child, but that is relatively unimportant. Do not deny your feelings or your attraction to the one child, for this child is reflecting something back you. What might that be? Each child inherits imprinting that forms the basis of the personality. This imprinting is passed down from generation to generation. Perhaps this child reminds you of a parent or grandparent. Perhaps the feeling of preference for the one child is because the other child shows you an aspect of yourself that you have yet to resolve. It is far too simplistic to answer all these feelings of special connections with suggestions that imply past life and soul connections. When we observe humanity, we observe that most, if not all, things come forth from within the family dynamic, both from within your new family, and your original family.
Each child that comes into your life comes with a gift. They come to show you who you are through the experience of being a parent to them. This is indeed the greater gift of parenting. All souls within the same biological family come together consciously and out of choice in order to help one another grow. The best question you can ask is what are your children teaching you about yourself? In answering that question, you can begin to embrace parenting with a more open heart and see your children as emerging adults, emerging personalities that are on the same spiritual path as you.
“Each child that comes into your life comes with a gift.”
I was born with a physical limitation and have come to accept this as ‘karma’ from a past life or as something that I choose to learn from in this life. However, how can I be assured that I don’t take this condition with me and create a future life with the same problem?
Let us reassure you that what you call ‘karma’ has nothing to do with punishment or retribution for deeds done in past lives. Your thoughts and emotions are the cause of karmic conditions, and these thoughts and emotions can develop certain patterns over time.
When a child is born with a physical limitation, it always has to do with the family itself. Emotional entanglements and blockages arise within family units that can last for generation after generation, often passed through either the male line or the female line. An incident such as the loss of a child, sexual abuse, the early death of a parent, an adoption, or forms of repressive, oppressive, or restrictive behaviour, can all be passed from mother to daughter, to granddaughter, to great granddaughter, and likewise from father to son, and to grandsons. As almost all children associate emotionally with the parent of the same gender, to learn about that particular role, they also absorb the emotional blockages of the parent in question. This parent in turn may have taken on an emotional burden from the grandparent, and so on and so on. When you look at human families, you often see repetition. Often mothers who have children during their teens will have daughters who do the same. A child always seeks harmony, and when he or she observes a mother or father’s pain, the child will often voluntarily take on part or most of the burden, out of love for the parent. This is the nature of children and the soul knew, prior to manifesting itself as the child, that this would occur.
The emotional entanglements literally block the flow of life force energy in the developing foetus. A foetus develops as a direct expression of the incoming soul. Each contour of the face, skull and body is an expression of the emotional state of the soul in question. So-called ‘birth defects’ are in fact the compounded effect of unresolved emotions within a given family.
However, the incoming soul is aware of this prior to incarnation, and the blueprint of its upcoming life is chosen consciously and with awareness. The incoming soul almost always has an intimate relationship with other members of the family, having worked with them in other incarnations or in the non-physical planes. However, at times a soul can volunteer to work with a family that is unknown to it in order to help them move forward. When it does so, the volunteer soul’s evolution is also helped forward.
When your scientists speak of genetic defects or inherited illnesses, it is of this that they are speaking. It is consciousness that builds the body, and just as the great-great-grandmother’s emotional state may have caused a physical ailment, this ailment can then be passed on to the descendants down the female line if there has been no resolution of the particular emotion, or the restrictive belief behind the emotion. Often, the very same soul that was the great-great-grandmother, for example, will re-enter the family as the great-great-granddaughter in an attempt to resolve the family issue. This occurs more frequently than is supposed.
So why would a soul choose an environment that it knows in advance may lead to physical or emotional challenges? You are all growth-seeking beings, and as such will take any opportunity to expand your capacity to love. Almost without exception, all the souls involved in such emotional entanglements are known to each other and have worked together as a biological family unit in previous lifetimes. Problems that occur in one generation are revisited in another as the souls involved seek to resolve all the problems in which they have taken part. If the original family ‘karma’ began with the great-grandfather who forced an unwed daughter to give up her child for adoption, then, if the inherited emotional state has not yet been resolved, that great-grandfather may choose to be reborn into the same family as the grandchild of the original daughter in order to do so.
As that soul approaches the physical plane of the family in question, just prior to incarnation, its vibration begins to change. It begins to resonate once again with the ‘family karma’, and the body it builds begins to reflect that vibration. A family’s strongly held beliefs can also have similar effects. When a sperm and an egg come together, not only does the DNA combine to create a unique being, but also there is a unique preparatory aura formed around the newly created single cell. Each sperm carries a replica of the auric field of the father and each egg carries a replica of the auric field of the mother. In this magnetic energy field are contained all the emotions, thoughts, beliefs, wishes and hopes of the parent. As egg and sperm combine, all these thoughts and feelings combine to create a unique mental and emotional body for the incoming soul. To this energy field is added the unique energy signature of the incoming soul, if indeed a soul has chosen to incarnate at that time. The unique signature of the incoming soul will contain the totality of all that soul’s experience. This soul energy, knowledge, and experience will fuse with the newly formed aura. In this way, a unique personality is created as a combination of mother, father, and incoming soul qualities.
If the mother of the incoming child had feelings of deep loneliness, these feelings would also become part of the child’s experience. However, the child is under the strong influence of the soul. The soul may have chosen this particular mother because it, too, had struggled with loneliness in past life experiences, and therefore chose once again to take on this ‘blueprint for life’ from the mother in order to evolve through this feeling. This is how a soul seeks growth.
Whatever the situation, whatever the ailment or physical limitation, or even mental illness, it is essential to remember that all this is done out of love, love for one another, and ultimately, love for yourself.
If you have a limiting physical restriction, it would help you to ask yourself what the physical restriction is giving you that you may not otherwise have had. Has it caused you to spend more time with your parents than is usual? Has it assisted you to develop qualities such as persistence, courage or compassion?
What does the restriction represent to you? As you give yourself the answers to what it represents for you, you will begin to uncover the true reason for the illness and become aware of the family karma you have come to assist your family with. Whether you experience your condition as negative or positive, it is truly love in action. You can resolve these issues emotionally and spiritually by releasing all that restricts you. When a soul chooses this kind of experience, it does so with great care. Not only does a soul choose with great care, it also summons forth advisors and considers all possibilities before embarking consciously on such a journey. Not only does the soul choose a life with such physical restrictions in order to serve others, it does so primarily to serve its own growth. If there were no value in the experience, then the experience would not have been chosen. You are growth-seeking beings, and this is how choices are made.
If you have an inherited condition and are concerned that you may take it with you into your next life, then cease worrying. There is a law that says that you cannot leave something until you love it. Loving is about allowing and accepting. As you accept your physical restriction, you release it. On a deeper level, you will one day see all the beauty and love that this issue has brought you. As you come to the realisation that all has been in service to you and your family, you will bless the condition and thank it for its service to you. As you release something with love, you cease placing your attention on it; and as you cease placing your attention on it, it ceases to be in your experience. Good health to you!
What else is there to be learned from our biological family?
It is important for you to know that, although we speak of inherited thoughts and emotions, you are not constrained by them unwillingly. We have spoken about opposites, have we not? The family blueprint that you inherited was chosen by you because it provided you with opportunities to develop in the areas you had previously selected. Perhaps you wanted to develop the art of forgiveness, understanding, compassion, determination, courage, or any number of soul qualities.
Not all of your feelings actually originate with you. Many of you who are reading this material are the children of those who have experienced wars, and as with all wars, there is trauma. These traumas have become a part of your emotional make-up and have also dictated the way in which your own parents were able to do their parenting. As you step back and look at your family in the light of this information, you can clearly see how thoughts and feelings are passed down through a family. It is those very thoughts and feelings which ‘one didn’t talk about’ that cause most emotional entanglements. These ‘traumas’ awaken a child to the pain of the parent. As it comes into the world a child seeks harmony. It is then the natural tendency of the child to alleviate some of the parent’s pain by voluntarily carrying the emotional burden within its own body. It does so out of love for the parent.
Emotion is healed at the point when you can honour your parents for what they have delivered to you, for they truly have been in service to you, as you have been in service to them. All that they are became a part of you, and it has been your part in the family karma to evolve those aspects. When you understand that everything was pre-planned and by choice, you can then honour the gift that your parents have given you. At this point, you are released to the true essence of your soul. As you release your parents with love and honour, your soul will have more and more influence upon you, and your life will be filled with joy.
If you disown parents, you deny the choices you made prior to this lifetime. And you deny the essence of who you are, for you are, in part, their creation. You hold within you their characteristics, thoughts, ideas, and beliefs. You are dominated by them only if you believe that you are, for you are here to evolve the family, and in doing so, you evolve the family of humanity, for as one person releases all that is restrictive, the planet is changed forever.