CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

WITH FOUR AND A half hours to go, I had to do something to kill time. Just hanging around would have driven me insane. I decided to go over to Jimmy’s. I was in the hall mirror at home.

But before I could mirror-port—that’s what I’d started calling going from mirror to mirror—something happened. Something that took about a thousand years off my life.

Jimmy appeared beside me. In the mirror where I was. Standing beside me, two and a half inches away

All my internal body organs went into Turbo Freak Alert Meltdown.

“Hi,” he said. That’s all, just “hi.” I can’t properly explain what was happening to my heart. It wasn’t in its natural rhythm, I can say that much.

“I guess it’s a shock to see me, isn’t it?”

Shock? No—discovering Ed McMahon on your front porch with a camera crew when you come home from school would be an example of a “shock.” This was pretty much way beyond that.

“You think I’m your boyfriend Jimmy, don’t you?”

No, actually I think you’re John Lennon and I’m Yoko Ono. Won’t my parents be pleased we’re back.

“I’m not. I’m Liz’s boyfriend, Jim. Pleased t’meetcha.”

This was fruit. He was fruit. I was fruit. The entire universe was fruit. All of a sudden, I knew where I was. In the psycho ward. Now it all made sense. I could be content here, I decided, putting on my happy face. I can learn to love macramé and I’ll bet we have a great croquet course on the yards. I just hope the nurses aren’t mean.

“Let me explain.”

Oh, please. It would be ever so nice. Please, please, please!

“Liz created me. Sort of like when you created her. I’m a second-generation mirror person. Which means I have restrictions. Like never being able to leave Mirror World.

“But that’s okay. I like it here.

“Not like ol’ Liz.

“She always wanted to see what it was like out there.

“But she doesn’t belong out there.

“She belongs in here.

“With me.

“I guess we both have a problem.”

I just listened. The rubber in my legs was beginning to solidify. He was sure one talkative cowboy!

And he had blue eyes. Jimmy’s—the real Jimmy’s—eyes were brown, like my own. Our kids didn’t stand a chance. Doomed to eyes of prose, not poetry. The guy, whoever he was, kept talking.

“I can help you solve your problem.

“Which will solve mine.”

He talked in paragraphs. I’d never heard that done before. Kind of like this girl Felicia Kearns in my drama class when she was learning her lines. She talked like that. Say a sentence, stop, like it was the end, and then say another one.

I found my voice.

“How?”

“I can show you how to get her back in here.”

“You can?” I couldn’t hide the thrill this news brought. I grabbed his arm. Nothing there. I’d forgotten we were mirror people.

“Yes, I can. It won’t be easy though. You’ll have to trick her.”

Whoa! Easy with the surprises, big guy.

“I know that, Austin Powers. I’ve already got a plan.”

“It won’t work.” He gave me this little knowing grin. I detest smugness in mirror people. It’s obnoxious. And how did he know my plan wouldn’t work? How’d he know my plan? Oh no... I knew why. He could read my mind too. This was terrific. Was nothing private in here?

“Not much.”

I groaned. Why didn’t I have a mind like our neighbor Mrs. King? Nothing in there but alcohol and cockroaches. Bet the mindreaders in here would give her a wide berth.

“I don’t know who Mrs. King is,” he was saying, “but if it makes you feel better, I can’t read your mind all the time. Only when we’re in the same mirror.”

I guess that means he’d been in a mirror with me before. Behind me or something. Good thing I hadn’t known. I’d be in intensive care, hooked to a monitor and eating my ribeye through a tube.

“All that’s unimportant, Elizabeth. What’s important is getting Liz back in here and you back in your own world.”

Now he was saying something. As a summit meeting, that was a wrap. We were both in complete agreement on the main point of the agenda. I didn’t agree with his opinion of my plan though. I didn’t have to voice my feelings. He already knew.

“Go ahead and try it. It won’t work. Liz can’t be scared and she already suspects a trick. She’s pretty smart.”

Well, maybe it wouldn’t work, but so far he hadn’t shown me a better idea. Then he did.

He was right. Next to his scheme, my plan was crappola. But, I’m stubborn and didn’t want to give up on my idea. If it didn’t work, I’d give his a shot. Besides, I didn’t know if I could trust him. Look what happened the last time I put any faith in a mirror person!

He said something then that made complete sense.