Annalisa and Colin took a cab to her condo, where she pretended not to notice the undercover car parked across the street. Her home felt like a zoo display. She checked her phone three times while Colin located his suitcase and toiletries. She was both relieved and disappointed to see no texts or missed calls. She didn’t want to hear the killer’s whispery voice, but his silence was somehow worse. At least if he called again with the same number, they could use it to track his location. To keep busy, she cleared away the cold remnants of coffee from that morning, where Nick’s mug and hers had been left sitting on the counter as they’d dashed out the door. She debated calling him to check in as she stood in the living room and stared at the blanket and pillow he’d left folded and stacked on the end of her couch.
Behind her, Colin made a clearing noise in his throat, and she nearly jumped out of her skin. “All set,” he said, his tone apologetic for startling her. “I can catch another cab or—”
“No, I’ll drive you. It’s not far.”
He tilted his head. “Better yet, why don’t you join me?”
She blinked at him. “What?”
“You look dead on your feet. Come stay the night with me. I’ve got two giant beds, a Jacuzzi tub, and a room service menu that reads like a novel. We can order food and catch up some more.” He gave her the same crooked smile that had melted her heart in high school, the same one she’d seen on Katie’s face in the missing Halloween photo. How had she never noticed the similarity before?
“Okay,” she surprised herself by saying. “Yes.” Better than sitting here alone in her apartment like a stuffed goose on Christmas morning.
His grin widened as he held her gaze. “Yes.”
She threw a few things together in a small tote bag and then drove them both to his swanky downtown hotel. “Travel writing pays better than I would have guessed,” she said to him as they rode up in a shimmering gold elevator.
“Oh, don’t be fooled. I have stayed in some luxurious places, but more often, it’s an Airbnb or a fly-by-night hotel. Once, I even slept on the beach.”
“Sounds romantic.”
“Not really,” he said as he swiped his key at the door. “There were sand fleas.”
She hid her smile and followed him into the giant room. As he’d advertised, there were two large beds with fluffy white comforters and an ocean of pillows. Her body ached just looking at them. Gingerly, she perched on one cushy edge while he consulted the room service menu.
“What do you feel like?” he asked. “Pasta? Steak? Seafood?” He put the menu down and rolled his eyes. “Listen to me, I sound like a flight attendant asking for your dinner selection.”
“Do they still serve you dinner on planes?” She’d only traveled by airplane once, a three-hour flight to Florida that had netted her a single can of ginger ale and an impossibly small package of pretzels.
“Sometimes.” He took the menu and sat next to her on the bed, close enough that their shoulders touched. “But here you can have anything you want.”
“Mmm,” she said, springing up from the bed. “I’ll have a burger, and I’d love to use your shower if that’s okay.”
“Of course, it’s fine. I’ll order the food.”
She fled to the other room and spent longer than usual standing under the hot spray. Colin’s hotel room was gorgeous with its thick carpets, damask drapes, and giant porcelain tub, but it was paid for by the night. No one actually lived in a room like this, and she had no idea how long he planned to stay. Best not to let herself get too comfortable. She floated out of the stall on a steam cloud, refreshed from the shower, and towel dried her hair before wrapping herself in a giant white robe.
Outside, Colin was setting up their dinner along the desk. “I don’t have a table,” he said, rueful. He’d dragged over the high-backed armchair for himself while she took the rolling desk chair. They ate burgers and drank cold beer from tall glasses. “Tell me about Nick,” he said eventually.
“What about him?”
He looked suddenly uncomfortable. “Well, from what your brothers said, he didn’t treat you very well.”
“Let’s just say his wedding vows were more aspirational than inspirational.”
“Sorry.”
She shrugged. “We were young and stupid.”
“And now?”
“Now? Definitely less young. Maybe less stupid. Time will tell on that one, I suppose.”
“But you work together. That could get awkward.”
“It isn’t,” she said, surprised it was the truth. “He was a lousy husband, but Nick’s a great cop. A great partner.”
“Partner.” Colin looked at the floor as he tested out the word.
She waited but he didn’t say anything further. “I wanted someone to notice me,” she said finally. “I wanted someone who listened when I talked.” She remembered those early days when she had rattled on to Nick about her family, her college classes, her girlfriends and their boy troubles. She’d tried to give him a crash course in Annalisa Vega, to catch him up to where Colin had been when he’d skipped town.
Colin raised his gaze to hers. “I’m listening.”
“Yeah,” she said softly. “But for how long?” He had no good answer for that so they stared at each other in silence for a long moment. “Is it really terrible?” she asked. “Being back?”
He let out a slow breath. “It’s weird. I’ve spent so many years deliberately not being here, you know? I’d take any assignment, anywhere, as long as it was far away from Chicago. I built this place up in my memory to the point where I felt like I might shatter if I came back here. But…”
“But?”
“It looks so much the same. Every so often, there’s a strange building, wham, out of nowhere, but mostly it’s just as I remember … and I’m finding that I … like it? I thought I’d left this place for good, but seeing it again makes me realize how much I’ve carried it with me this whole time. When the plane came down, I was legitimately excited to see the skyline and the lake beside it. I love the bridges and the food trucks and the jaywalkers and all the seagulls everywhere. When I saw the river today, it felt like it was running through me.” He shook his head. “I believe you can live anywhere and be happy. But maybe only one place can ever be home. It’s the place you recognize with your heart as much as your eyes.”
She smiled through her tears. “I’ve missed you.”
He stretched out a foot and hooked it around the base of her rolling chair. “And I missed you,” he said, dragging her closer. He cupped the side of her face. “My Mona Lisa. The girl with the prettiest smile.”
She thought he might kiss her then, but he merely ran his thumb over her cheek and then dropped his hand back to his lap. “I realized today when your brothers were sharing their feelings about Nick that I, too, would like to punch his mouth. Then I realized he could probably punch mine. I haven’t treated you very well either.”
She reached for his hand and squeezed it. “You had to get out. I understand.”
He regarded her with an intense look. “And you had to stay.” She’d been sixteen with no distant relative for escape. All those nights sleeping with her light on, terrified that a man might come in with his ropes. Colin gripped her hand tightly, and she resisted the temptation to look away, to refuse to show him how much she’d hurt. “I think I’m only realizing now how hard that must have been,” he murmured. He brought their joined hands up to his lips and kissed her knuckles.
She felt an answering flutter in her belly. “Colin…”
“It’s my turn for the shower,” he said, breaking contact. “Feel free to order dessert if you like.”
“No thanks, I’m stuffed.” She wiped her hands and mouth one last time on the linen napkin and then amused herself with the TV remote while Colin took his shower. The Cubs were losing to the Pirates, eight to three. She flipped over to the travel channel, which was featuring the top ten most stunning beaches or some such mindless countdown. Colin reappeared dressed in a robe that was a twin to hers. She realized she should probably put on pajamas, naked as she was under the terry cloth, but she was too comfortable to move, sprawled atop the downy comforter.
She flinched, surprised when he stretched out next to her instead of taking the other bed. He left a foot of space between them. “Have you been there?” she asked, waving the remote at the white, sandy Turks and Caicos beach that shimmered on the TV.
His gaze flicked to the screen. “Yes.”
She gave an envious sigh. “Is it that blue in real life?”
“Crystal. Like a summer dream.”
“You’re not making this any easier, you know,” she said, rolling to face him.
He gave her a tender smile and tucked a lock of her unruly hair behind her ear. “You could go. You could go anywhere you want.”
“I don’t even have a passport.”
“So, get one. Get one and I’ll show you the world.”
Her insides jolted at his words. She said nothing.
“Colin…”
“Hmm?” He’d picked up his phone, his attention elsewhere.
“Did you ever make it to Salar de Uyuni?” She held her breath after the question, which she knew was foolish to care about. What did it matter whether he remembered their plans from twenty years ago?
He looked up from his phone to meet her eyes. “No. Not yet.”
A flush went through her as he held her gaze. She saw that he felt it, too, that their relationship still existed in a place of improbability, like a prehistoric dry lake set high in the Andes Mountains.
He flashed a grin and snapped off the TV. “Hey, check this out.” He fiddled with his phone until a song began to play from it.
She smiled as she recognized the tune, “More Than a Feeling,” by Boston.
“You remember?” he asked as he lay down facing her again.
“Yes.” Their first dance, their first kiss. “I remember.” She felt overcome again, exhausted and yet giddy with memory. For years, she’d thought she carried all these moments alone. Her eyes filled with fresh tears, and she couldn’t blink them away.
“Shh, don’t cry.” His face crumpled too and he pulled her into a full body hug. He stroked her spine and rubbed the back of her head while she burrowed against him. She listened to the familiar thrumming of his heart and smiled when she realized he was still so excited to hold her. Her fingers wandered up his back to play in his damp hair.
“It feels funny to be in a hotel with you,” she confessed into the fragrant hollow of his neck. “Back then, we were lucky to get ten minutes in a room with a locked door.”
“But we made the most of them, as I recall.” He traced one fingertip down her collarbone and into the shadowed V of her robe.
“You certainly were Johnny-on-the-spot.”
“Hey, now, I think I’m being maligned.”
“You were sixteen. Sixteen-year-old boys are known for their enthusiasm, not their stamina.” She grinned and pressed a quick kiss to the underside of his chin, which made him growl in the back of his throat and flip her under him. Their bare legs rubbed together and his mouth settled on hers. She opened for him right away, as hungry as he was. Her skin warmed in all the old places. The robe sagged open as they moved together and his hand slipped inside.
“Anna,” he said, his voice aching as his palm found her naked breast.
“Colin.” She forced herself to think. “I—I didn’t come prepared for this. I don’t have anything.…”
“Oh.” He shifted off her and leaned over the side of the bed for his pants. From his wallet, he withdrew a condom like a magician with a black hat. “Ta-da.”
She decided not to linger on the issue of why he had one so handy. “Ever hopeful, hmm?” she asked, gently teasing as he settled over her again.
“Yeah, I remember you made me carry one around for the better part of a year before I finally got to use it.” He puffed up, pretending to be affronted.
“Poor baby.” She touched a finger to the dent in his chin. “I had to be sure you really meant it.”
“Anna.” His expression softened, and he held her face between his hands. “I always meant it.”
They kissed some more, robes falling away completely, and she discovered he’d learned some new tricks in the years they’d been apart. But then again, so had she. Their bodies still spoke the same language, as eager to be joined as they’d been during their early fumblings in his twin bed, ears cocked for the creak of parental footsteps on the wooden stairs. She didn’t have to hold back her groan of satisfaction when he finally slid inside.
After, he cuddled her like a long-lost teddy bear, tighter than she really enjoyed, but she didn’t want to leave the shelter of his arms. She kissed the smooth flesh of his bicep and closed her eyes for sleep.
She awoke an unknown number of hours later. The drapes held back most of the light, but she could see a corona of sun burning around them. Phone, she realized with a start. Hers was ringing on the desk across the room. Colin stirred as she scrambled naked from the bed and checked the number. Him. She pressed opened the app to record the call and hit the answer button with a shaking finger. “Yes?”
“Detective Vega. I hope I haven’t woken you.”
“It’s fine.” Her heart pounded so fast it made her dizzy. She gripped the back of the chair for strength. “I’m—I’m awake.”
Colin sat up bare-chested and watched her intently.
“I take it you retrieved the gift I left for you,” said the man on the phone.
“You mean the music box? It’s beautiful.” She licked her lips. “Maybe you could tell me where you got it.”
“Oh, I think you already know.”
“Why did you pick that one? I mean, Grace had a large collection.”
“It was the one she and I listened to together,” he replied, and her flesh rippled with goose bumps. She struggled to focus, to keep him talking.
“It was kind of you to think of me. I was less charmed by the rope, though. And that you took my frog.”
“But I gave him back,” he said, putting on a pout. “He can return to his place next to the azalea bush.”
Her stomach lurched at the reminder of how close he’d been. “You went to my house.”
“And you weren’t home.” He sighed. “It’s a pity we keep missing each other.”
Bile rose in her throat but she swallowed it back down. “We could meet.” On the nightstand, her personal phone started to ring. Colin snatched it up.
“Meet you? I’ve been trying, but you’re not cooperating.” He sounded peeved now. “I’ve had to improvise.”
“Just name the place.”
Colin climbed off the bed with her other phone. She tried to wave him off but he kept coming. “It’s Zimmer,” he whispered, holding it up for her.
“Who’s that?” the man on the phone demanded at the sound of Colin’s voice. “Is someone there with you, Annalisa? Someone in your bed?”
“No one,” she said desperately, feeling him slipping away. She shushed Colin even as he took the other call.
“I’ll let you get back to him, then. We can talk some other time when I have your full attention.”
He clicked off and she tossed the phone down with a curse. Colin stretched out her other phone to her. “I think you’d better take this.”
“What now?” she snapped, a hand to her head.
“They traced his phone. They got a location.” His eyes were huge and terrified.
“What? Where?”
“He’s calling from your house.”