Even after we found out that he didn’t cause the crash, Eric was still controversial. There were consequences for sheltering and repairing an unlicensed robot. We were all taken to the Robot Decommissioning Authority for questioning. The Robot Decommissioning Authority was a very small man with very big teeth. When he smiled, it looked like his teeth were trying to run away and find a bigger mouth to live in. He asked us loads of questions. Then said the only absolutely safe solution was to take Eric to R-U-Recycling and put him in the crusher. ‘This should have been done weeks ago,’ he said. ‘When Alfred Miles had the misfortune to discover this Eric thing in Lost Property.’

‘No!’ begged Dr Shilling. ‘Eric was built with noble intentions. When the plane crashed, he was behaving nobly. Bravely. He saved my father’s life. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for Eric.’

‘There are plenty of robots who can do anything that Eric can do far more quietly and efficiently and with far less squashing of police cars and disrupting of airports.’

‘My grandfather built Eric,’ said Dr Shilling, ‘to protect my father. Thanks to Alfie, he has come down to me through the generations. He is like family. He’s all the family I have. Please.’

The Authority agreed that Eric was a robot of historical interest and that Dr Shilling could keep him in the museum.

I was glad that he was not going to be destroyed but a museum? Really? Surely Eric was good for something more than being looked at.

A plane flew over.

‘Twelve fifteen. From Sarajevo,’ said Shatter. ‘Wednesdays only.’

‘How do you know that?’ asked the Authority.

‘Because next. Wednesday I’m going to be. On that plane. Sarajevo is my home. I’m going. Home.’

‘She’s from Bosnia,’ said Tyler. ‘That’s why her home is in Sarajevo, which is the capital of Bosnia. She had her foot blown off by a landmine during the war there.’

‘Surely not,’ said the Authority. ‘The war in Bosnia ended in 1995.’

‘But I stepped on. A landmine last. Year,’ said Shatter. ‘When my dad. And me were. Picking. Blackberries.’

‘I always thought you were fighting in a war,’ said D’Arcy.

‘No. Picking. Blackberries.’

‘The war was over before she was born,’ said the Authority.

‘You think. So?’ Shatter glared at him. ‘A war is only. Over when it stops. Hurting people.’

Which is when I had my great idea. I put my hand up. ‘Eric’s a knight,’ I said. ‘All he needs is a quest. I think I’ve got an idea.’

Dr Shilling took me and Mum to the airport to wave Eric off. Shatter was going with him. They had to turn off the metal detector so that he could go through Departures without setting off every alarm in the place. He introduced himself to all the security people:

MY NAME IS ERIC, THE WORLD’S MOST POLITE ROBOT. PERHAPS WE CAN BE FRIENDS.

Dr Shilling said, ‘Goodbye and take care.’

Eric said, I’M SORRY. I’M PRESSING YOUR EJECTOR BUTTON NOW.

Which made no sense unless you knew that he was speaking in the voice of Dr Shilling’s grandmother. He was reminding her that he was sort of part of her family.

Then he looked at Shatter and said, FOR GLORY!

‘See you some. Time,’ Shatter said to me.

‘See you sometime,’ I replied.

And then they were gone.

We still need to keep talking to you to keep your brain patterns busy. We tell you what we’re up to and what’s happening in the world. Mum keeps a note of anything that makes your brain activity spike. The biggest spikes always come whenever we see Eric’s quest on the news. Mum always brings a tablet in and plays the reports about ten times at maximum volume.

‘At over six foot and weighing half a ton, Eric looks a bit different from the robots who clean our floors and deliver our pizzas,’ said the news reporter. ‘Some people have called him the Mechanical Knight, partly because he has courtly manners and partly because he looks like a gigantic suit of armour.’

The film showed Eric walking around a hillside somewhere, a group of people watching him from behind a Perspex screen.

‘Look!’ shouted Mum. ‘Isn’t that your little friend, the fierce one?’

Shatter was right at the front of the crowd. Dr Shilling was standing right behind her.

‘This is one knight,’ said the news reporter, ‘who has found his quest!’

On the screen Eric took one more step and – Blam! – the ground beneath his feet exploded. Eric crashed to the ground.

‘Yes!’ said the news reporter. ‘The mechanical knight has gone into battle against the scourge of landmines left over from the war. His method is very simple. He looks down at the location of the landmine and says, “I AM ERIC. THE WORLD’S MOST POLITE ROBOT”, then he steps on the mine and it explodes.’

As she said the last bit, Eric staggered back on to his feet. His body was dented. His head had gone a bit wonky and his arm was hanging off.

‘Poor Eric!’ gasped Mum, holding her hands to her face.

‘Don’t worry about Eric,’ said the reporter, as if he had heard her. ‘With a bit of welding and some WD-40 the metal man can be made good as new. The man of steel is virtually indestructible.’

At the end of the report they interviewed Shatter. They said she’d invented Eric, but she put them right. She said her friend had found him and she’d helped fix him. We cheered when she said my name. And your brain activity peaked when we cheered. ‘He’s a. Warrior,’ said Shatter, grinning with pride. ‘He goes round fighting. For kids.’ BLAM! ‘So they. Don’t get. Hurt I. Love explosions. Brilliant! We’re going to. Travel all over. The world destroying land. Mines in Egypt, Cambodia, Uganda – you. Name it.’

After that they interviewed Dr Shilling. ‘It was my grandfather,’ she said, ‘who originally repaired Eric. Many years ago. He would be so proud of the work that Eric is doing now to protect children all over the world. For many years Eric was missing. I’m so glad that Alfie Miles found him.’

The camera showed Eric inspecting his damaged arm. When he realised the camera was on him, he adjusted his joints and said:

A GENTLEMAN LOOKS HIS BEST AT ALL TIMES.