THEY DROVE into the park where Magazine runs through it and turned into the parking lot for the zoo. Ray found a spot near the front entrance. He trotted around the car to open Sebastian’s door and help him out.
It was gallant, in a way. Sebastian felt quite taken care of and, surprisingly, it felt good. Ray had a way of making it all part of being a gentleman, not as if Sebastian were an invalid.
The entrance stretched for what looked to Sebastian half a block, but Ray led him straight to the far booth.
“Two, please. Seniors.” Ray spoke into the little circle cut into the glass booth as he passed her his credit card.
The woman inside slipped him two tickets, and he took them. He gave one to Sebastian. “Here.”
“Thank you. Remember, this time lunch is on me,” Sebastian reminded him.
“Of course.” Ray smiled and led the way to the turnstile. They gave up their tickets and entered.
Immediately Sebastian’s nose was assaulted by smells, hurling him back in time to his youth. Fresh-popped popcorn. Hot dogs. A faint odor of animals.
“I have been here before, when I was a small child.” He stared all around him as the long-forgotten memory surged back. “It didn’t look anything like this. But it smelled exactly the same.”
“I think there is a rule that all zoos must smell the same.”
Sebastian wandered deeper into the zoo as Ray picked up a map from the info booth. All around, the sounds of animals whooping and roaring, birds chattering, people talking, children running, took him back in time.
“And the sounds. How very odd.”
Ray caught up to him and showed him the map. “Where would you like to go first?” They sat on a bench near the Asian exhibit to decide.
“It all looks wonderful. I don’t remember it being so large. You’ve been here before, so what do you suggest?”
“Well, it is larger than before. Let’s walk through to the elephants, see them, then over to catch the tram. We can ride it, get off, and get back on wherever we want.”
“I vaguely remember the sea lions. They were in the most fabulous enclosure, or was I dreaming?” He looked around, as if he could see them from where they sat.
“You were not dreaming. It is still there, and one of the most beautiful of the buildings they saved. It is one of my favorites. We’ll ride the tram to the reptile houses, which were built in the twenties, and then stroll over to the sea lions.”
“Sounds great.” They stood.
Ray offered his arm again, and Sebastian took it. They strolled, arm in arm, under a canopy of huge oaks, hundreds of years old, to the elephants. Ray and Sebastian leaned against the fence of the enclosure and looked across at the pachyderms as they swayed back and forth, trunks searching the ground for food.
“I wonder if they ever get bored.” Sebastian pointed. “They live for a long time.”
“In a way, it is sad.” Ray frowned. “But this is a nice enclosure, and I am sure they are well cared for. At least, I would like to believe that.”
He took Sebastian’s arm. “Let’s catch the tram.”
They walked past the large fountain with playing elephant sculptures, through the old iron gates.
“I remember these,” Sebastian said. “There used to be a sun dial…. There it is!”
“They kept as much as possible from the old zoo. So many people grew up with them, to remove them would have destroyed memories.”
“Yes. It’s true. Why do you know so much about the zoo? How long have you lived in New Orleans, Ray?”
“I come here often and sometimes, I talk to the curators. I have lived here for the last five years. After Claude died, I moved to New Orleans. I just could not bear to stay in our house anymore.”
Sebastian patted Ray’s hand. “I understand. Frank and I lived in one of my houses in the Faubourg Marigny; it was larger than the cottage. After he died, I moved back to the Quarter. Memories.” He gave a little shudder.
“Yes, memories.”
“Look! The Roman taffy man!” Sebastian let Ray’s arm go and strode over to a large wooden wagon. “Did you know it used to be pulled by a mule? It would visit all the neighborhoods, and we’d all go running with our nickels to buy a stick of taffy. I should buy some for the boys, for old times’ sake.”
“I did not know that. I just thought it had always been here. Perhaps on our way out, so you do not have to carry it all day?”
“Good idea. Don’t let me forget.”
Ray led him to a little house where they bought tram tickets, then sat down to wait. The room was built to resemble a train station in Africa, with long benches and lots of windows. As they waited, a woman with two young children came in and sat down.
Ray wrapped his arm around Sebastian, his hand resting on his shoulder.
The woman frowned and pulled her kids to her. Ray ignored her, but Sebastian fought the urge to glare back. This was supposed to be a pleasant day, and he didn’t want anyone to spoil it.
Ray leaned over and whispered into his ear, “I think we are being watched.”
“Yes. With a very judgmental eye too.”
The woman shot them an icy glare; her spine straightened and she thrust out her pointy chesticles, as if protecting her children. She reminded Sebastian of a blend between a porcupine and a 1980s cone-bra-wearing Madonna.
“Why do they always think we might molest children?” Ray whispered.
“Stupidity or ignorance. I don’t know which one is worse.” Sebastian said this a little louder, so she would hear.
She blushed and took both kids by the hand and went to sit on the far side of the room.
“Let’s sit behind them on the tram,” Sebastian suggested.
“You are a devil.” Ray laughed.
“Sometimes. When I get my back up.”
“I prefer sitting toward the rear. The engine is quite loud.” He gave Sebastian a look as if to say “behave,” and Sebastian shook his head.
“Never. If I ever do, you’ll know I’m dead.”
Ray sobered. “Please. You joke too much about dying.”
Sebastian patted Ray’s hand. “Well, I have to, don’t you see? Gallows humor. It’s a survival mechanism, I suppose. Perhaps I’ve seen death too many times.”
“Perhaps my own pain is still too fresh.” Ray looked away. “The tram is here.” He stood, and Sebastian followed him outside.
They waited for it to stop, then got in close to the rear. Ray was silent, and Sebastian feared he’d once again put his foot in his mouth.
What if Ray was right and he wasn’t ready to move on? Wasn’t ready to have a relationship with another man? Not if Claude still haunted him. Perhaps it would be best if Sebastian just kept this at a friendship and didn’t try for anything more involved.
It would be nice to have someone to just go places with, like the zoo, the museum, or shopping on Magazine Street. Someone with shared interests, but he could keep his heart safe.
The tram wove its way through the park at a leisurely pace, passing under massive oak trees with arms that dipped down to touch the earth, then soared back up to the sky. Children climbed on some of them; some had lovers taking pictures of each other posed along the branches.
Ray still didn’t say a word.
“Are you all right?” Sebastian touched Ray’s knee.
“Yes, I am. Just thinking.”
“A penny for your thoughts.” Sebastian hoped Ray would share his feelings with him, so at least he’d know where he stood.
“I have been thinking what a fool I am.”
Sebastian’s stomach dropped out from under him. Ray was going to end it before it even started. Despite the fact Sebastian had worried about the same thing, the idea Ray wouldn’t think him worth the effort hurt.
“A fool?” Sebastian didn’t want to hear this, but perhaps it was better to do it now than later.
“For letting Claude’s memory come between us and what we might have together.” He took Sebastian’s hand in his and brought it to his lips to brush a kiss across his knuckles.
“Oh.” Sebastian’s heart did that little A-fib thing again.
“I promise. No more talk about Claude. No more melancholy. When I am with you, I will only feel lucky, think only good thoughts”—he leaned closer—“want to be with only you.”
“Oh my.”
Ray leaned in, and Sebastian closed his eyes to wait for the kiss.
The tram came to a halt. “Reptile house!” the conductor shouted, and they broke apart. Sebastian sighed.
“This is our stop.” Ray got out and helped Sebastian down.
“You were right.” Sebastian gazed at the structures. “They are marvelous. But I have to admit something to you—I hate snakes.”
“So do I, but I love these buildings and the little treasure just outside the gate, behind them.”
Sebastian followed Ray to the rear, which was the actual entrance to the buildings. A long, shallow wading pool stood just outside the iron fence. It had the most marvelous bronze sculptures of children.
“I love these bronzes. To look at them, to imagine the days when the pool was filled and children splashed….” Ray’s eyes softened.
“Well, if you like those sculptures, you’re going to love the ones in my patio.” They now were the pride of Sebastian’s home. Only Lane and Matt knew the truth about the identity of the model.
Sebastian slipped his arm in Ray’s and tugged. “Come on. I want to see the sea lions.”
“Ah, when do I get to see your patio?” Ray asked as they strolled along the concrete path.
“In due time, love, in due time.”
Ray halted, and Sebastian stopped. “What?”
A large grin bloomed on Ray’s face. And in his dark brown eyes, Sebastian could read pleasure and hope.
Sebastian laughed, pulled off his hat, and playfully plopped it on Ray’s head.
“In due time.”