“I REMEMBER this.” Sebastian walked up the low, wide concrete steps to the sea lion enclosure. Built to resemble a Roman temple, large round columns encircled the pool of water where the animals swam.
He went to the wrought iron fencing, topped by long curved spikes to keep the animals in, and wrapped his hands around the metal posts. As if sea lions could leap over the tall fence.
Inside, the sea lions basked on large rocks in the middle of the pool or darted past under the water.
“We have lost the ability to build things of beauty just because they are beautiful,” Ray said as he stood next to Sebastian.
“Who would build such a thing nowadays? A Roman temple to house seals?” Sebastian laughed. “But I’m sure, when it was built, they didn’t think it odd.”
They watched the sleek black animals glide through the water, come to the surface to snatch a lungful of air, then dive down again.
“Are you tired?” Ray asked as they walked away.
“I could use a break.” Sebastian didn’t really want to admit it, but a sit-down would be nice. “Perhaps we can find a bench in the shade?”
“I know just the place.” Ray led him over to a circular fountain with benches placed around it. Overhead, the oak trees formed a canopy to shade them.
Sebastian sat, and Ray sat next to him, their legs and shoulders touching. “Am I too close?” Ray asked.
“No, not at all.” Sebastian smiled at him.
Ray put his arm around Sebastian and rested it on the back of the bench, looking to anyone passing by like nothing more than two good friends.
“Are you enjoying yourself?” Ray asked, his mouth very close to Sebastian’s ear. His warm breath teased along Sebastian’s skin.
“Very much. This was a wonderful idea.” Sebastian rested his hand on his own leg, unsure of placing it on Ray’s thigh.
Ray pulled off the hat and plopped it in his lap. Then he reached up, took Sebastian’s chin, and turned his face to him.
“May I?” His gaze locked with Sebastian’s.
Tingling started low in Sebastian’s body, nearly drowned out by the butterflies in his belly. Ray was going to kiss him. There could be no doubt Ray wanted to, not with him asking permission. All Sebastian had to do was grant it….
“Please,” he whispered.
In a courtly gesture, Ray brought the hat up to shield their faces from any passersby and pressed his lips to Sebastian’s.
Sebastian sighed. Ray caught it and sent it back to him. Sebastian’s good hand fluttered, for a moment unsure; then he cupped Ray’s cheek as he deepened the kiss, his fingers sliding into the man’s thick, straight hair. His heart did the A-fib dance and his groin came to life. Quelle surprise!
“Oh my,” Sebastian whispered, his lips still barely pressed to Ray’s. His body hadn’t responded this way is such a long time. It scared him but excited him, all in the same breath.
They moved apart, and Ray let the hat drop to reveal them, leaving Ray smiling and Sebastian catching his breath. Ray took Sebastian’s hand in his and just held it as they relaxed, watching people stroll past.
They sat, silent and content, until Ray turned to him and asked, “Shall we move on?”
Sebastian wanted to stay right where they were, have another kiss or two or three behind his straw hat, hold hands, and let the afternoon move on. But the day would have to end sometime, and he wasn’t sure he wanted Ray to think he’d been completely swept away by one kiss. Although it was a marvelous, toe-curling, breath-stealing kiss. Sebastian wanted to retain some bit of control and, for now, he didn’t want Ray to think he had the upper hand.
After his long years of experience dealing with lovers and potential lovers, Sebastian knew he had to play it close to the vest. No matter how much he wanted to take Ray’s mouth in a deep kiss, he had to appear nonchalant. And he would, even if it killed him.
“Yes, I’d love to see the Louisiana swamp exhibit. Also I’m getting a bit peckish.” This time Sebastian stood first, grabbed his hat from Ray’s lap, put it back on his head, and started strolling, leaving Ray to catch up.
And like a faithful terrier, Ray came to Sebastian’s side, slipping his arm through Sebastian’s good arm. He smiled and gave Sebastian a sideways glance.
“Will there be alligators?” Sebastian asked.
“Yes. Very many, as a matter of fact. If we are lucky, we might be able to watch them being fed. I understand they use chickens.”
Sebastian gasped, his hand to his throat, and halted in his tracks. “Live ones?” The thought of hearing the chickens clucking and squawking as they were tossed to the hungry gators was almost too much for him.
“No. Just the carcasses.” Ray frowned. “We do not have to watch.”
“Thank God.” He exhaled. “I just don’t think I could eat after seeing that.” He rubbed his belly.
“Then we shall avoid the feeding. We will see the exhibit, have lunch, and then catch the tram back to the front of the zoo.”
“Marvelous.” Sebastian started off again toward the sign announcing the tram station. They sat and waited with some other zoo-goers in the little three-sided shed until the tram pulled in, then boarded.
When they disembarked from the train outside the swamp exhibit, it was nearly midafternoon. Sebastian’s stomach growled, telling him lunch was overdue. They strolled through the exhibit, saw some of the animals, peeked at the gators sunning on the banks, then went inside the café.
Cajun music filled the air, and black-and-white photos of the bayou country hung on the walls.
“Blessed air, I sing your praises!” Sebastian brought out his hankie and mopped the damp from his brow.
Ray waited, cool and calm, as if the humidity dare not touch him.
After Sebastian put his hankie back in the pocket of his pants, they stepped up to the window and ordered a plate of jambalaya, two meat pies, and two iced teas. Sebastian paid, and Ray carried their tray to a table in a far corner, away from the other diners scattered about the room.
They chatted as they shared the meal.
“So, where did you live in France?”
“When my father was alive and serving as a diplomat, we lived in Paris. When he retired, we were allowed to stay in France. How he managed that, I have no idea. He bought a small house in Provence, and that is where I have always lived, off and on. Since my parents’ death, I have made it my home. Of course, I traveled quite a lot. It was during a trip to New Orleans that I fell in love with the city.”
“I’ve never been to France. Frank and I had plans, though.” Sebastian shrugged. “It wasn’t to be, I suppose.”
“You could have gone afterward. Why did you not?” Ray looked deep into Sebastian’s eyes, as if searching for the answer.
“Alone?” Sebastian shook his head. “Perhaps I would have, if I’d been younger. I’d have taken on the world then. But now….” He shrugged. “I don’t speak the language. Frank knew some French—enough to get us by. I’d be lost.” He didn’t want to admit how badly he’d been devastated by Frank’s death. Looking back, he’d used it as an excuse to distance himself from any more pain and anguish, and, in a way, from life. Perhaps that had been a mistake, after all.
“I only spoke a little English when I first moved here. You could pick it up quickly,” Ray assured him.
“No, I don’t think so. I’m not very good with languages. But what about Claude? Was he French?”
“Yes. I met him while traveling in Provence. His family owned lavender fields. We were together for a long time.” Ray’s eyes clouded, looking far sadder than he had all day. “But now I am moving on.”
“Well, it’s a good thing I’m moving on also. It just took me much longer to get going, that’s all.” Sebastian chuckled. “Is the house in France the one where—”
“Yes. We were at dinner with friends. One minute we were discussing the latest showing at the gallery in town, and the next, Claude….” His voice faltered.
Sebastian reached out and took his hand. “You don’t have to tell me.”
Ray looked up, tears in his eyes. “I never got the chance to tell him how much I loved him.”
“I’m sure he knew.” Sebastian squeezed Ray’s hand, then handed Ray his handkerchief.
Ray shook his head as he wiped at his eyes with it. “No. We had been having terrible fights for months. We had one that night before the guests arrived. It was all just keeping up appearances, really.”
“I’m so sorry.” Sebastian didn’t know what to say but knew nothing he could say would make it better.
“I keep thinking, if only I had not argued. If only I had not made such a ‘big deal,’ as you say, about something as small as what we were serving for dinner.”
“Everyone argues. Lord knows, Frank and I had our share of screaming, knockdown fights.” Sebastian tsked. “Lovers’ spats at best. At worst, I was ready to leave him.” He’d never confided that to anyone, but he’d been so hurt to find out Frank had cheated that it took a few days before it sank in that Frank had HIV.
“You are right, of course. I am just struggling right now. It is not you.”
“My dear, please do not use the old ‘It’s not you, it’s me.’ It couldn’t possibly be me.” Sebastian tried his best to lighten the mood. “I’m quite the catch, you know.”
Ray laughed. “I do know. Trust me, I am quite aware of your charms. You are all I can think about. During the day, at night, in my bed.” He gave a sly smile as he handed Sebastian back his now-damp handkerchief. Sebastian tucked it back in his pocket.
“Oh my.” Sebastian leaned closer and lowered his voice. “In bed? What are you thinking?”
“What I want to do to you, of course,” Ray whispered, as he placed his hand on Sebastian’s knee and gave it a squeeze. A tremor of desire rippled through Sebastian, giving new life to his cock.
“Oh my,” he murmured.
Perhaps he was wrong. Perhaps old people did talk dirty.